Hey guys, I think this belongs here. Has anyone got magnetic implants or other transhumanist style shit...

Hey guys, I think this belongs here. Has anyone got magnetic implants or other transhumanist style shit? Also does anyone know of a place in the south of England that would do one?

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wired.com/2007/04/esp/
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>Be in car accident
>Unconscious
>Get taken to hospital for MRI to assess damage
>Fingers explode

Sure sounds like a great idea! Remind me to get one in my dick so I can really feel the energy of fucking my motor-assisted fleshlight!

Fucking idiot.

Shit I'd say losing the tip of one finger would be worth it to be able to feel the presence of generators and motors.

>feel the presence of generators
Yeh. Because the obnoxious as fuck noise isn't enough to give that away.

You're missing the point bro. It'll be a useful thing that's also interesting enough to compensate for my lack of personality.

I suddenly need magnets in my fingers

Kys, even worse than tattoo fags. Get something actually useful, like bionic eyes.

>Thinking surgical implants aren't held on your medical records, which are always accessed before something like an MRI.

Clearly too much faith in the NHS.

These aren't placed by surgeons, there's no medical record besides your receipt, if that. It's usually done on the dl because it violates laws in most developed countries.

>need to install new component
>magnetic fingers
At least you won't lose the screws

I'd sure love losing my finger because some not-a-surgeon fucked up

I don't get the benefit.

>it violates laws in most developed countries.
Source?

Magic tricks

The only semi useful biohacking related thing I've heard of is this small plate drilled into your chest that sends an electrical signal to your brain every time you're facing north. It'd be interesting to see how much your sense of direction would improve with prolonged use.

You could just have a ring or a bracelet that vibrates everytime you face north, that way you wouldn't have to put shit in your body

Could be interesting

>transhumanist
it's a fucking magnet in your finger
it's a cheap gimmick
stop trying to make this seem cool or important

Better get a brain coprocessor, retard

Enjoy destructing every electrical device with data on it you will get in your hands

It wouldn't be that strong ,it would be so weak that would be useless

Or you could just carry a compass around like the retard you would have to be to care which way fucking north is anyway.

It's a cheap gimmick that works! I want 10 of them!

So what is the point to do this to your body if it'll be useless.
Op is a faggot

Imagine how many little kids you could fool. Enjoy life a magician op.

Hey lifting paper clips with one finger and needing to be really carefully with that has it uses

>care which way fucking north is anyway.

That's not the point. The point is that if you conditioned yourself to "intuitively" know where north is, you add a whole other layer of perception to your sense of direction.

why the fuck does it have to be drilled into your chest lol

The only real use I can see for it it's teaching little kids how is west left of north and east right of north


Hell if anything it would be annoying as fuck

Who gives a fuck? It's like spending five hours every day with a KFC chicken leg shoved up your nose so that after a couple of years, you can intuitively identify where a certain chicken was cooked. Useless.

>magnets under skin

At last, Singularity!

>MRI starts
>CRAWLING THROUGH MY SKIN

Wtf i hate mrts now

and take your iShit with you

I've had several magnets in my left ring finger, experimenting with size to find what the best size is, its pretty fun but is in no way useful and people will think you're weird if you tell them, also gotta be careful if you're playing with big electro magnets because they rip straight out. Pretty easy to do your self though watch codys labs first video on it, make sure to gold plate/sterilise everything

You have no idea how well knowing the north can help people navigate. People who have trained their "sense of north" are able to traverse through mazes a lot quicker than others who do not.

or a life lmao

>because they rip straight out
Jesus God

Sounds retarded.

Yeah because I get lost in a maze every other day

Again, it has nothing to fucking do with just knowing which way north is, it has implications.

Retards.

>Retards
Not an argument, chicken breath.

>it has implications

Yeah it implies that you're fucking retarded

I wasn't arguing, just stating the facts.

There was 0 facts in your post

The biggest loser I know has one of these.

Do you think a surgeon with years of education, training, and practice is putting in stupid fucking magnets?

>PAGING DR. FAGGOT, QUIT SAVING THAT DUDE'S LIFE, THIS DEGENERATE NEEDS A MAGNET IN HIS FINGER

Get the fuck outta here

What facts nigga? What implications? You get the fuck outta here too

Retard.

>Shove magnets or rfid chips into your skin
>LMAO I'M A TRANSHUMANIST LOOK AT ME
no you're a fucking moron.

Not an argument

>small plate drilled into your chest that sends an electrical signal to your brain every time you're facing north
damn magneto you could just carry a compass

>>Do you think a surgeon with years of education, training, and practice is putting in stupid fucking magnets?
Literally have you heard of plastic surgery you cucknugget

This is the dumbest shit

You really can't make the connection between intuitively knowing where north is and one's sense of direction and spatial mapping?

I like the bracelet idea better, but a compass would not work the same way.

Somewhat less dumb than people that disfigure themselves with ugly piercings and/or tattoos but still dumb.

>You really can't make the connection between intuitively knowing where north is and one's sense of direction and spatial mapping?
Go lick a stump, Jethro. We have smart phones with maps now.

There's no fucking reason to know where's north 100% of the time.

It's that too much information for you retarded brain or what

Nigger, I'm in medical school. Do you think a plastic surgeon goes through 4 years of undergrad, 4 years of medical school, and 6 years of residency to PUT IN FUCKING MAGNETS?

Plastic surgery, and all surgery for that matter, involves an incredibly detailed understanding of physiology, anatomy, and kinesiology. Properly forming a jaw, or a nose, or a set of tits is as much of an art form as it is a procedure.

Putting in a magnet is a minor procedure that involves little to no skill. Surgeon's wouldn't fucking bother with this shit. And honestly, if you're dumb enough to put a magnet in your finger you probably don't have the cashflow to have a plastic surgeon insert one.

Elective surgery is bad enough, this is just retarded.

This. And compasses. Hell, if you had an implant to tell you where north is, what's the point of improving one's sense of direction? The implant would do it for you.

Enjoy your no batteries.

>undergoing a shock whenever you face north will cause you to develop an intuitive sense of cardinal direction

wew the level of retardation is powerful with this one
better go buy a magnet, capacitor and battery to grant yourself this powerful magic ability

Yeah because compasses and maps uses battery now

I have to wonder how safe this even is in the first place. Wouldn't the body just reject any foreign material?

KEK

underrated

yes, that's why it's impossible to have a hip replaced. or get a breast implant.

If you're going to be out in the fucking wilderness, you might as well spend 10 minutes learning where the north star is. Or just shove a stick in the ground and see which way the sun is going.

Or maybe you could ram a compass up your cock.

I can't hear you over the sound of compasses in your fingers

Kill yourselves, pragmatists. It's not about that. It's interesting because you're improving innate capabilities of the human brain, isn't that the purpose of all this trans-humanist nonsense?

Yeah ,you should stick a vibrator up your ass that it's activate every time there is a wi fi signal


How about that

Knowledge improves your capabilities too.

Get the fuck out of here with that trans-humanist bullshit.

We haven't even perfect organ transplants and now you're thinking of becoming more than human?

Call me a pragmatist, I call you a fucking retard.

wtf i want a sextant in my scrotum now

No disagreement there.

And I call you a pessimist.

Some people have a mental disorder that causes them to believe wifi causes them physical pain.

I was actually really interested in these for a while. There is this one woman who did it herself, gave a few ted talks and that sort of thing. Being me and stupid 16, I gave it a try.

>convince mom this is actually a cool idea
>Buy mini magnets off ebay but pretend they are for another project of mine
>one night, have icepack, xacto knife and towels
>numb hand for a while, feels good
>slice skin on either middle finger or ring finger of my non-dominant hand, can't remember
>can't manage to past the second layer, where the actual muscles and shit are
>every time I try get incredible pain
>at this time I'm bleeding a decent amount, ice not reducing the pain

lol

if you actually plan to do it yourself, either don't or numb your hand to the point you can't feel it, and be ready to lose a finger.

No mention of the haptic compass after this many posts?

wired.com/2007/04/esp/

Fuck Cred Forums, I'm losing faith.

Okay I take it back.

But still, sensebridge.net

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the magnets were coated ghetto style in hot clue so the magnet wouldn't corrode and fuck you up. If you attempt this instead of going to someone you need a magnet with a coating that won't rust away, or if doing it professionally get it coated in medical grade silicon

Wow that shows how stupid and useless the idea is

but just look at your iphone LOL

>if you actually plan to do it, don't
there much more concise

What law could this possibly break that all the other extreme body modification crap doesn't?

>Whichever buzzer was pointing north would go off. Constantly.
>"It was slightly strange at first," Wächter says, "though on the bike, it was great."

What a fucking perv.

i hope you don't build computers

Wouldn't affect computers.

are you sure

They lose effectiveness very rapidly the further away the are. A hard disk is pretty well protected so your average consumer magnet wouldn't affect it at all I think. If you sent it through an MRI machine that would wreck the shit out of it.

who the fuck calls this "transhumanism"?