/ICE/

FILTHY OUTLANDERS STOP COMING HERE REEEEEEEEEEE -edition

anything and everything you need to know or discuss about Iceland belongs here

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youtube.com/watch?v=CY3wzOOva28
youtube.com/watch?v=5F_INMLk_lE
youtu.be/5F_INMLk_lE
forlagid.is/?cat=1775
youtube.com/watch?v=VgwRGOWnQuU
reddit.com/r/Iceland/search?q=moving american&restrict_sr=on&sort=relevance&t=all
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

/balt/

hello /balt/ how is your day

my dad cheered for iceland in the euros

I would too if my national football team lost twice to the Faroe Islands

denbt nations must stick together desu

Do you guys all know each other?
Your entire population is the same as my city

Do you praise the fairies 5 times a day while facing the holy rock ?

>tfw 5'4 and built like an Icelandic construction worker

that means you're built like a pole m8

don't mock the hidden people Hans

Do you know your entire city?

Are bastard children very common in Iceland?

What even happens in iceland?
Is life just boring like in my little village?
or is it fucking amazing?

I don't know 300,000 people no
>tfw not normie

yes, there isn't really a notion for it here
here it's usually: meet up -> become gf/bf -> move in together -> have kids -> get married
my cousin has two kids with her bf of 7 years and they're pretty conservative but don't really consider it a rush to get married even if they are in all but name

there are a shit ton of tourists (more in the summer but plenty year round) here so the town is very much alive
much more alive and much more to do than there was 20 years ago

not really an expert on it though since I rarely leave the house

but I cheered for Iceland before we lost to the faroes (are you the faroese poster)?
this, how did you recover anyway?

>are you the faroese poster

we recovered thanks to a tourist explosion and we still have a strong export based economy with aluminum and fish

also I believe Föroyar have their own flag on Cred Forums

>don't mock the hidden people Hans
>trips
Kek has spoken.

Never forgive, never forget.

>my city has more than three times more people than iceland

>also I believe Föroyar have their own flag on Cred Forums
yes, but I'm a Faroe Islander in Denmark

Am I welcome Iceland. Your people were very nice when I visited.

>Hidden people
Super Autismo

GIVE FISHING RIGHTS BACK REEEEEEEE

I suppose it is easier to recover from an economic crisis being a smaller nation (see Cyprus or Ireland)

He is a Faroese poster who went to Denmark for studies

Will your government pay me for fucking your women? I'm 6'2'' with blue eyes and dark hair. I could make a lot of pretty babies.

I am sorry better luck next time

of course

see our african friend i have no idea how this hoax became so widespread
as I'm aware it started spreading on egyptian facebook

how does it feel to btfo the eternal anglo

pretty good
this is taught in primary school as Iceland's finest hour

are Icelandic people tall? Every icelandic poster I've seen here is a manlet so that gives me hope

does someone has that video about the iceland girls who want to peg guys?

Do you get to read sagas in history classes?
And do they teach you about Norse mythology in school?

Fun fact: Iceland has a phallus museum. Literally loads of dicks and dildos for sale in the gift shop

Why are Danish posters so chill

Foroyar reporting in

went to grab dinner

about 180 cm average
am 182 myself

fuck off

yes, the sagas are required reading from middle school to the end of high school
you also have to know a bit about Norse mythology and read the Eddas

even moved to Reykjavík recently

weed

velkominn

>182cm Manlet

Takk fyri vinurin

Return lceland to balt at once!

how tall are you
how tall are germans
the swamp germans are pretty tall but the regular ones aren't that tall are they?

Please tell me the secrets behind this strange practice
youtube.com/watch?v=CY3wzOOva28

signed

/balt/ is an Icelandic protectorate
we defend them from the evil Russkies

apparently my home team learned this from a visiting team from Scotland and it quickly became popular in Iceland

Iceland we love uuuu!

Yes

If I decided some day to keep sailing North from the tip of Donegal would I reach ye lads?
How long would that take?

I am 192cm and I don't feel like I am tall. I see a lot of people bigger than me.

according to google maps you'd miss us and reach north eastern greenland

eesti is beesti

Ohh...
Is there much there?

there is nothing in greenland but polar bears and seals

>fuck off
post it
pls

turns you on?
youtube.com/watch?v=5F_INMLk_lE

Ah.
It's grand. I found that if I keep sailing North from Downings in Donegal I'd reach Þjóðvegur
I'm gonna do it someday lads.

what about the iceniggers?

>turns you on?
thank and yes
im jelous actually, im antarctica and couldnt see an aurora and you see them usually there
i will have to go to iceland when i return

you gotta go slightly west and there you have it

hello my friends

aurora is great
only a month or so before they start being common

>mfw 1.74 18yo manlet

I have no future in northern europe, I have to stay in this poor shithole so I won't be towered by everyone

Ak?

nei, þetta er maggi texas

you are too close to the magnetic pole

this meme nation is better than us in everything, even at footy :(

is the aurora even visible from any inhabited place south of the equator?
rio grande isn't nearly as far south as Iceland is north

gib free burgers pls

How long do ye think it would take sailing?
2 or 3 days?

the lead singer looks ugly compared to the others

no idea
not a sailor
know it's something like 1000 km though

yes, sometimes when the geomagnetic storm are intense people from some parts of new zeland can see it, from ushuaia is impossible since is too far from the geomagnetic south pole

and obviously from some antarctic stations too

>I will never live in Iceland
>I am locked into this endless plain of boredom and poverty
Kill me please.

you have cheap vodka though

Jaysus, only 30 hours.
It'll be fierce craic altogether.

I don't drink alcohol.

how do icelandic manlets cope with living in such a tall country?

why not

I don't like its taste neither effect of drinking it.

god speed
supposedly the seas can be pretty rough in the region though

the same as manlets in the rest of northern europe, by posting frog memes on the internet

are leftists as present in iceland as in, say sweden?

I will have a tall wife so my children arent turbomanlet 1.75 like me

start m8
you'll get used to the taste and alcohol high (aka being drunk) is the best feeling ever

not quite thankfully
things are still pretty bad here

As every russian I am very adictive person. If I play vidiya I play all day long forgetting about everything. If I eat I almost explode my stomach so if I start drinking it will end badly.

shité, are there fugees there already?

alcoholism is a meme made up by pussies who can't handle a bit to drink
t. expert

Hey grannar, pls send neftóbak

I see a lot of alcoholics everyday mate, it's not a meme. Monday, 7am, I am going to uni and see a dude standing in the middle of some yard and drinking vodka directly from the bottle.

faeroe sort of sounds like "faro" in spanish, which means lighthouse. Is your country some big lighthouse meme or sumn?

Stop trying to corrupt him you degenerate, alcohol is shit

yea
not many but still like 50

sænskt snus er betra
en þið verðið þá að senda okkur eldvatn

Iceland why have you stopped raiding Ireland?
We have grown weak in your absence

Yes basicly. Or pharaohs

your country is hot you wouldn't understand

why are Icelanders and Faroese so cool compared to other snowniggers

raping and pillaging is looked down upon in our degenerate times unfortunately

I heard we got like 50. Probably outdated though

You dont leave your room much, do you?

>Pharaos
hmmm only us woke niggas know that them kangs is your ancestors doe

it's what being on an island does to you

>muh fyn and muh sjælland do not count btw

>raping and pillaging
Only if you're white, Eivin

its just that other scandinavians and northern europeans are very rude people

>its what being on an island do to you
You mean getting cucked for almost a millenia?

you can pillage me all you like ;)

Yep, my local team, motherwell, were those that started it

>pic

I need to visit ireland
are irish grills qts?

this one?
youtu.be/5F_INMLk_lE

Iceland is too cold and harsh for kebabs and therefore a paradise t: Finnish man

>we recovered thanks to a tourist explosion
tfw I visited Iceland before it was cool

>pic
Really makes you think.
Especially since you still learn a Danish in school and recently needed our help to debunk the rumors about marrying your women that are circulating in the middleeast.

Am I white Cred Forums?

I look like pic related but a bit uglier

Not enough forrests. No Finn could survive there.

>are irish grills qts
you should know, the vikings kidnapped so many that icelanders share genes with us now
But yeah they're ok. Not as good as say Spaniards but you still would

forgot pic

Finns are sensible people

danes are very experienced in dealing with muslims so you are welcome to handle that for us

>not as good as spanish
I hope you are joking m8

that's actually true
they're probably not too different from icelandic grills
in that case they're pretty qt

white
everything west of constantinople is white

spanish girls are sexy as fuck t b h
if you think they aren't maybe you dont see the ones I do

but they are obnoxious though

I have a physio degree, is it helpful if you want a job in iceland?

all grills are obnoxious

yes but not as helpful as in germany for example
we mostly need low-skill labor

so like construction workers and shit? Aren't most migrants well educated?

>so like construction workers and shit?
exactly that and people willing to work in hotels, restaurants and tourist shops see: if you're referring to the refugees then no they're mostly uneducated

You bet. Pic related is our current plan. They never realize it before its too late.

Are you a brit by any chance?
Literally only people I see being crazy about spanish girls despite that they look like a hooknosed transvestite 99% of the time.

Or maybe you're talking about mestizos/latinas in South America?

all women are like that

Does Senja count?

No I'm Irish and have two Irish parents
i haven't seen any danish girls so I can't judge but every summer thousands of Spanish come here so I see them all the time

I'm talking about the labor workers, in Germany and USA most european migrants have atleast a degree

none of the norwegian islands except for svalbard are far enough from the mainland
norwegians are cool though

nope, here we mostly have uneducated poles and lithuanians that work in construction

Where are the best immigrants from?
Do they integrate well?

>immigrants integrating
you cant integrate unless you're born in a country and go to school with mostly natives
the integration meme is a myth

do you live in iceland?

>Where are the best immigrants from?
other nordics
they integrate pretty well
the poles and thais not so well

>mfw you have a physio degree but you would never fit in a country like iceland because you're a 1.74 manlet

I don't. I'm just curious, but I think it would be interesting to live in Iceland for a few months.

Try crossdressing. Maybe you could pull off as a girl with your height and all.

this is a no-bully thread

M8, by their nature Greeks are extra hairy. and thus could not pass as grilllls.

t. 1/4 Greek

I'd rather live in Peru

Just a joke calm your knickers

>tfw 178cm
So close yet so far.

Do you shave your legs? Growing up I had a lot of leg hair but almost no chest hair

Try east asia. Heard Korean girls have a thing for thing for hairy and tanned guys for whatever reason. And the height even fits.

>being under 180cm
not even European desu

What do you do for fun that is specific to Iceland?

...

>t. Wasnt considered white 100 years ago
Dont you have some cars to blow up?

N-No B-Bully plox.

>t.wont be white in 20 years
dont you have some refugees feet to scrub?

not much
what do you do that's uniquely french?

its not as bad as Cred Forums makes out t b h

>noice dubdubs
Nah m8... why would anyone shave their legs? Hairy legs are manly :^).

... Thinking about it though, you must have pretty fuckin' hairy legs to warrant ever shave them.

Icelanders are manlets, 174cm is average

why would you lie on the internet
it's 181 cm for men

Is that the average overall or Adults only?

why is iceland so cool

Far away from the Equator and close to the North Pole.

>managing to not be rare with this low population
How autistic are Icelanders?

being that far north does it to you

okay, 181 then. 174 is normal though. really just a soft penis lengths difference

We used to play to pétanque but it's been replace by mölkky lately.

How rare are natural blondes in Iceland? Here they're very rare.

Perhaps their Cred Forums representatives represent a vocal minority.

If you're interested: natural blondes are fairly common among (white) South Africans. Including Jewesses, of course.

Please send more of your blonde girls

it's a huge difference in averages though
174 is Albania or South Korea

don't know the stats but not at all rare
also a fair number of redheads here

huh, interesting
don't really know if there's much here
swimming pools are very popular though and every town, even small ones in the countryside, has a heated pool

do Polish women dye their hair blonde?
I would say atleast 50% of Irish women dye their hair blonde

I'll take one of your fine blond qts my friend.

Oh yes, 9 out of 10 blondes are dyed. There are so few natural blondes that in all of my schools i've only seen 3 natural blondes. And i've been to primary school, middle and high school. There are natural blonde women here but the if you will finde one and a qt at that chances are she's 100 percent taken. I've been spending too much time on Cred Forums and /gif/ becasue they gave me blonde women fetish and i hate dyed hair which means getting gf in this country is almost impossible.

most common hair here is brown
even blonde people here arent bleach blonde like Nordics

Though one thing I've noticed in white South Africans is that many of them (at least from my purely anecdotal observations) enter life with blonde hair and it gradually darkens over time. Even happened to me! By the time I had turned 9 my hair had browned completely -- a fairly bright, vibrant brown mind you but, brown nonetheless.

With the way things are going here, they'll come of their own accord. If you can try nab an Afrikaaner, or a Cape Town Euromutt, they're extra rare and have special attributes (Afrikaaners tend to be more boisterous, lively & individualistic, think un-cucked other-side-of-the-same-coin Dutch. the Bolanders seem to practise some vague form of Eugenics "we don't marry barbie-dolls" I think because they want strong Rugby-playing sons..) (Cape Town Euromutt, especially if they attended of the elite girls-only schools, are more traditionally feminine, but in a modern context ... multiple generations of mix-breeding only the finest races together --- thanks Apartheid! more petite than not)
Also, perhaps I'm just naive, but in my experience most white girls don't dye. only old women to hide their age...

I have got solid tips to pick up Polish women
just act like pic related and you can choose any woman you like

Hverr er ég?
Hverr ert þú?
Hvar erum við?

djúpt

"vare" is the only thing I can conjugate in Icelandic, desu.
I can't even decline the word "hverr" correctly, I am a disgrace ;_;
B-but I can speak a little Latin.

it's vera* and hver* m8
hverr might be old norse though, not sure
>tfw can't speak latin
why even lve

"vare" instead of "vera" was a typo.
"Hverr" is Old Norse, male pronoun. "Hver" is Old Norse, female pronoun.
I am not female, am I?
Well, in Old Norse I should have said "Hverr em ek?" probably.
But oh well.
>why even lve
Taciti "Germaniam" legere volo, ufs (ut fidelis sim).
I want to read Tacitus' "Germania", desu.

Ehh if it would only work that way.

Et tu catamitus?
Ex tu boipuccius
Dongus expandus
Ejaculare Nostrum
....

AUSTIMUS MAXIMUS (XD)

>Et tu catamitus?
*Et tu catamite?
Vocative, dude.
>Ex tu boipuccius
Ablative doesn't work that way.
>Dongus expandus
>Dongus
No.
>Ejaculare Nostrum
Doesn't make sense.
>AUSTIMUS MAXIMUS
>Austimus

yea Icelandic dropped the gender difference in the nominative forms for some pronouns and some plural forms merged

I read a translation of Germania but it's not the same ;_;

There's this super adorable Icelandic girl in my school. We take a few classes together, and we see each other every day. It's her first year and my last, and I feel like I fucked up any chances with her by not taking enough risks.

how old is she? and where in sweden is this?

Near stockholm. She's 16 I think.

Thank you for indulging me, Hans. I don't know what came over me.

I don't know why but I can't stop giggling at my stupid jokes.

Take her before some nigger will steal her 1st time.

oh just checking
know a qt studying in Göteborg but she's also older than 16

>icelandic ring road is 850 miles

WTF

why is that surprising?
is it longer or shorter than you expected?

I thought I could drive around your whole island in a day

Not much risk of competition. We're both in asperg class, pretty cut off from the rest of the school. Still, that isn't fullproof. We do seem to live pretty close to each other, at least compared to how far away the other students live. All in all I seem to have been dealt a decent hand here. The biggest problem is my own fears.

nah mon
Iceland is larger than Ireland (the island) and slightly larger than Portugal or the UK minus England

It would be comfy to rent a bike or a horse and visit some parts at a slower pace, but renting a horse is expensive.

DESU! How is the E-book market in Iceland?

>mfw 178cm
Forever king of manlets

really have no idea
why are you wondering about that?

you can also use a car like normal people

Prins Póló belongs to Ice

I want to buy some books in Icelandic :3

this is correct
prins póló is now a property of Iceland

I see
no idea how to get them outside of iceland desu

Larger than Ireland and Portugal? Wow, there go my preconceived notions.

the island itself isn't small
it's just mostly uninhabitable

I'm imaging you don't have a big railway net since you don't have many cities.

there are no trains or trams or anything of the sort on the island

>no trains
Wait what? Not even one small line to transport cargo? How do you do it then? All by trucks?

Thank you desu.

www . forlagid . is

are those ebooks?:3

>or anything of the sort
Not even qt trams?

nothing
imports arrive by sea or air and are moved to shops by trucks
public transport is by busses only

the main exports are aluminum, and all the smelters are by the sea and have their own harbors for importing raw aluminum and exporting refined aluminum, and fish which never leaves the harbor since the fish working stations are by the harbor

all other cargo that needs to go from one end of the island to the other moves by truck or sea

forlagid.is/?cat=1775
these are ebooks
they do have a warning though that they don't work on kindle but if you want them on kindle their books are available on amazon

It's time for anschluss, iceniggers.

I use KOBO :3

Thank you desu.

So you travel by bus or plane?

I have an icelandic last name and am 1/4 icelandic according to my DNA test. Can I get citizenship? I want to become a strongman and hang out at the pool t bh

come and get it mohammad

mainly private car or air
the island isn't that small but it's also not that big, you can drive anywhere in at most a day
flying is becoming more popular though

there are busses but they're mostly used by tourists or people that for some reason don't own a car

I believe you have to be the child of an Icelandic citizen to be eligible
no idea if ancestors of West Icelanders as they're called get any special treatment

we need labor though, I don't think it's very hard to get in

How often do you feel depressed by the bad weather?

Are you people friendly toward european tourists?

What do you generally do for fun on your spare time?

it's not so much the weather but the light
waking up when it's dark and leaving work/school when it's dark sucks

I like to think we're friendly towards most tourists, especially european ones

I mainly shitpost, play vidya and drink but normies go out partying

what do you do in Brazil?
go to the beach? or is that too normie

Cool, seem quite a regular place to be, then
Don't you get the impression Iceland is too much isolated from mainland Europe, and you generally feel like you're missing something by staying on the island or are there things that are fine for getting by anyway?

I have a friend from Sardinia and he always felt like he was trapped because he had to live on an island for like his first 20 years. I don't know if Icelanders feel the same about the place.

Most big cities in brazil are near the coast, so people like going to the beach, especially tourists.

Middle-class Brazilians like gathering together and doing something called "churrasco".
They gather around and cook some special barbecue meat called "picanha". It's quite good, you can google that if you never heard about it.

They generally buy local beers and drink while chatting and stuff. Those are like mini-parties and it can happen quite often no matter the age of the group.

...

Kek, are "west icelanders" known at all there? My family is from Gimli, Manitoba, where we celebrate Islendingadagurinn every year (get drunk and watch neckbeards pretend to fight eachother like vikings):

youtube.com/watch?v=VgwRGOWnQuU

>Don't you get the impression Iceland is too much isolated from mainland Europe, and you generally feel like you're missing something by staying on the island
eh, not really
I've lived here all my life and Icelanders are pretty insular
we don't hear too much about what's happening in Europe or what there is to miss
Reykjavík is the center of the country (not literally) and everything that's "going on" so to speak happens in Reykjavík where I happen to live

I can only imagine it's quite different in Sardinia where they mostly hear about Italian things and what's happening in Italy which must be concentrated in central-north italy which is also where all the jobs are

All educated people and most uneducated know about Gimli
about a fifth of the population left for the new world in the 19th century so it was no small deal
not many are aware just how "Icelandic" it still is though

OK I will check back in once I have learned your impossible language. Pray for me

gangi þér vel sonur Óðins

how much is the cost of living in iceland?
is hot water free?

>how much is the cost of living in iceland?
high, as expensive as countries that are not Luxembourg or Switzerland get

>is hot water free?
not quite but cheap like $30 a month for all you could possibly use it for

You guys said you need manual labor jobs? How much do they typically pay? Are there any skilled trade openings? How are Americans received there and re there any American immigrants? I promise to learn icelandic if you let me in Thor

>How much do they typically pay?
like 3-500,000 isk = $2,600-4,300 a month maybe

>Are there any skilled trade openings?
probably, not quite sure though

>How are Americans received there and re there any American immigrants?
Everyone (note, not literally everyone) loves Americans
there like 600 Americans here making them the 7th largest immigrant group after Poles, Lithuanians, Danes, Germans, Latvians and Brits

problem is it's pretty hard for anyone outside the EU to get a work/residency permit
not sure how exactly you'd go about it

according to [spoiler]reddit[/spoiler] you essentially have to get employed before moving
reddit.com/r/Iceland/search?q=moving american&restrict_sr=on&sort=relevance&t=all

Wait, 32,000$ worth for manual labor jobs? What the fuck sign me up. Iceland seems like a really comfy place dude, I'd love to live there for a few years something about living in what's basically the boundary of the world is amazing to me (Life of walter mitty turned me into an icelandboo tbqh) How are the universities there? Would serving in the national guard help with permanent residency/citizenship?

>How are the universities there?
there are two none-meme ones
University of Iceland is the biggest one, state funded and teaches most everything
its geology department is very respected
University of Reykjavík is private and mainly focuses on computer science and law
>Would serving in the national guard help with permanent residency/citizenship?
probably not
you can't even be stationed in Iceland anymore since the base was closed
studying here probably would though

walter mitty was a great movie, all the scenes that were not in NY were shot in Iceland, Greenland was Stykkishólmur in the west and Pakistan in Vatnajökull national park in the south

...

I don't understand this meme

An Icelandic guy recently visited my office for business and he gave me a bottle of brennivin. What's the best way to drink it other than straight?

like you'd drink vodka really except it's best chilled
it's pretty similar
it goes great with fermented shark or herring

I meant as in serving in your national guard, like France's Foreign Legion (also considering that for EU citizenship). Is U of Iceland in Reykjavik too? It was a really good movie wasn't it? Enjoyed it way more than I thought I would and it left me feeling really optimistic about life

>I meant as in serving in your national guard
there is no such thing
we have no army, no navy, no militia, no national guard, etc.
our defense is the responsibility of NATO

> Is U of Iceland in Reykjavik too?
yes, in the very town center in fact
15 minute walk to the parliament or the seat of government and 30 minutes to Hallgrímskirkja the big church which is in all photos of Reykjavík

and yea, usually not a big fan of Ben Stiller but he really pulled through
the movie was simple and a bit cliched but sweet and upbeat

So how big is Reykjavik? Is it dense or spread out in a sprawl? Are there any other cool cities and villages to check out? Btw, you should definitely come check out the US sometime, don't believe the memes you won't actually get shot.

it's a bit of a sprawl unfortunately
it's 200,000 people in 6 municipalities with their own separate building plans and mayors for some inexplicable reason

there are other towns, most notably Akureyri (population 18,000, biggest outside of the capital region) in the north, and dozens if not hundreds of smaller villages scattered around the island

and yea, New York and California are definitely on my list
it's just so expensive to go to the US compared to Europe
got at least 1 European trip, maybe 2 planned before heading west

Reminds me of Boston with the style of houses for some reason. Word of advice, New York (city) is fucking Norway tier expensive and honestly not that great for any visit longer than a day or two. If you can go visit Philadelphia and Boston. Philadelphia is more or less my home city and it's got some amazing buildings and history, same with Boston. They both have alot of revolutionary and colonial history so if you have any interest I strongly suggest checking them out! I don't know much about Cali, you'd have to ask somebody who lives there.

there was a whisper that you would be taking our dollar for currency and we lost our shit.

I remember that
nothing came of it though since the idea was mostly brought up by anti-EU types as almost everyone realizes the Icelandic króna is fucked

I'm sure NY is great, know plenty of people who've been there and loved it
but yea, I've also considered Boston since they've been offering (relatively) cheap flights over there but it's not as flashy or exciting as the big apple you know for someone making his first trip

also, lost your shit in a good or bad way?
what did Canadians think of it?

seeing the state of the Canada dollar I'm kinda relieved it didn't happen though

in a good way. we like attention.

Benis