/asean/

fuck off list:
everyone except asean countries

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=oT9NoiQLSeo
gmanetwork.com/news/story/582413/news/nation/duterte-china-claims-over-sea-made-in-good-faith
youtube.com/watch?v=HbKoXaIVO9s
youtube.com/watch?v=JG6x4MHdTWM
youtube.com/watch?v=-FOkm4P5pjo
youtube.com/watch?v=BKgDcN6MH_Y
youtube.com/watch?v=l3jGfeH0HE4
youtube.com/watch?v=YF-tBVVumMw
youtube.com/watch?v=WU54WpQNYic
youtube.com/watch?v=TPj4xrD77BE
youtube.com/watch?v=IpyxNne4odE
youtube.com/watch?v=2Z1nEnr3GME
youtube.com/watch?v=6L1_empGNvg
youtube.com/watch?v=IOC-GLs9TEw
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

We have enough Filipinos here that we should be /asean/, too.

Nice try Mr. Chang

Cinapore

wkwkwkwkwk

why don't you take a seat right over there? user.

Thread theme

more like sillypenis mirite

/asean/ is dead

Not a fan of the "Republic" of the Philippines

Check the Cred Forums Twitter lads

Absolutely brilliant.

Most Hmong diaspora so we're in 2bh

what's the proper? Maynila or Manila? what do NCR people usually say?

Im just wondering

Do you guys do your laundry with your own hands or with a washing machine?

Mommy does it for me because mommy loves her good boy

i call it metro
para medyo socy
lam mo na yun kuya

Washing machine and sun powered dryer.

With a maid

call me kuya more,I love it when you do that ;3

rate my maid of honor

Washing machine. I've never seen or heard of someone doing it by hand, not even the abos because they don't wash their clothes.

>medium water
>put two cheap ass ariel kasi 7.50 nalang
>put all of my week worth of clothes
>15 minutes
>put in spinner for 5 minutes(2 batches)
>sampay sa loob ng kuwarto because i dont want my sister sniffing my brief

The GF passing me a snack

My maid said Bisaya is shit. She's tagalog BTW.

Maids have their own maid?

They are rich in their hometown, so why not?

Is that a bear?, dunno why its neck kinda long

>Foreigners have to do visa runs because they hate their own country

fucking brown shitholes

Yes. It's in the Jakarta zoo. They have some really cool animals I had never seen before.

Thanks for the info

Have you ever seen a Philippines Mouse-Deer? It's so fucking adorable (and probably delicious too, if it wasn't an endangered species)

nice car

Looks like a sun bear from the neck marks, its a mainland SEA & Borneo only bear.

yes they're very cute,you shouldn't eat cute things

Best brand of shoes in the world, and pretty cheap too for their quality.
Just ordered one of these motherfuckers. Not gonna lie. When I come to Asea I will have to hide in my hotel so that girls don't rape me when they see me wearing them.

I dont know that gay hipster faggot is allowed in this general

>you shouldn't eat cute thing
The cycle of life is beautiful in its own way too user

that's not a cycle,that's just a straight line

>I dont know that gay hipster faggot is allowed in this general

Get on my level, you fucking plebeian.

Hehehe saved!
Do you think I can buy Nazi paraphernalia in Indonesia?

>tfw no Nazi Indonesian GF

Washing machine
If i do it with my hands it will take half a day

Of course.

You will never relocate to the Philippines, staying in a cozy condo in Cebu City, making a living online at your desk overlooking the bustling seaside city and surrounding countryside. When you finish, you walk out to your balcony and water your potted mango tree and chili peppers. Turning to walk back in, you see your Filipina gf of indeterminate mixed ancestry who is currently a nursing resident at a local hospital walking in the door as she arrives from her afternoon shift. You ask her how everything went as you make some iced coffee for both of you; it was tiring, as usual.

After a quick shower and relaxing on the couch while talking about your weekend plans, you both decide to go out for some food. You take a walk down to your favourite greasy spoon for some evening sisig and beer. Despite being only 4'9”, your gf can knock back a surprising number of San Miguels. You also share some isaw, which is the chef's specialty and one of your favourites. And like clockwork, the older waitress tries to convince you to date her niece, which you politely decline (for the 7th time this month). Afterward, your Filipina gf asks you why you never take her out to a fine restaurant.

When you arrive back home, you quickly check your earnings on your laptop before relaxing on the couch again. You've done almost nothing today, yet you feel exhausted. It must be the heat. Your Filipina gf scooches over and starts playfully tugging on your full beard while whispering in Tagalog (she isn't Cebuano). You know what's happening next.
(cont'd)

You take your Filipina gf to bed and make passionate love until she climaxes multiple times and you cum deep inside her. She even lets penetrate her ass for the first time, using her own juices as lube for anal.

Shower number two follows, a much longer shower lasting the better part of an hour, leaving you both fresh again, and your balls so thoroughly drained you could see the difference on the bathroom scale.

You open a window to let the cool breeze in but then you remember this is the Philippines, promptly close it, and turn on the AC for a bit. You go back to bed and lay together until she falls asleep in your arms. When you can't sleep you quietly get up and continue writing that novel you've been working on and checking Canadian marijuana stock prices while sipping some lambanog until you feel sleepy. Then, you slip back into bed and snuggle with your Filipina gf until the neighbours' roosters wake you up in a few hours.

>tfw it had nazi flag but now is banned because International's butthurt
Fuck wescuck I swear.

>Literally knocked out by all the feels for not being in Asea already. I go to sleep with the satisfaction that I am one day closer to either being in Asea or to death

what did we mean by this?

It it so bad over there right now?

Rape

My

Benis

honey

So baby pull me closer

And touch tips

Of my kontol

pull the sheets right off the corner

Just you and me baby girl

hello friends

fukc off

It's not very normal to say stuffs like "I love you" or "you are beautiful" here, i wonder if the other ASEAN countries are the same?

Girls say that to me. But one day when I didn't bring my wallet out, I was ignored

but i thought viet girls all say ME LUV U LONG TIME when they first meet you

lay off the full metal jacket la

>*it aint me starts playing in the background*

I keked at the movie. Muh freedom.

I'm guilty of this

When I first paid a visit to Germany ages ago I turned off a German chick I was trying to impress by pestering her and everyone about WW2, Nazis, WW1, Kaiser Wilhelm, Wunderwaffe and Hitler.

She then introduced me to her grandpa who was a Wehrmacht survivor and had a different spin on how things went

>WE WUZ PROTECTING YUROP FROM BOLSHEVIKISM/GOMMUNISM
>WE NEVER RAPED WOMEN, WE WOULD GIT SHOT JA
>WE WUZ PEACEFUL BUT PARTISANS KEPT SHOOTING AT US

it depends

when i was in college i have two girls, qt girl calls me her future husband and other one pretends to be our daugther calls me daddy

the best part is when you get to fuck them and they keep saying kuya in bed

Good Day!

A friend of mine will be conducting a study on social media including perceptions and attitudes of Filipinos towards social media in general. If you are available and interested in sharing your thoughts with regards to this topic, please complete this form:

The study will be conducted somewhere in Legaspi Village, Makati City on Sept 26 2016. Cash incentives will be given to the participants. Thanks!

Fuck off Dutertard

bagong modus operandi ni Recto Killer
babala

Is this about Psychology / Sociology or for the purpose of the Philippine literature? If it's about literature count me in.

Hey that's not nice. Titless people are human too.

Sure we're the same, it's weird and awkward, even casually with your wife. Unless somewhere private.

BOBO AKO MID

Well history is written by the winner after all.

kek

In UK people kiss each other in public. That would be weird here.

the one on the far right is a qt

why are duterte supporters so cringy?

PFFTT HAHHAHAAHA

why are flips in general so cringy?

go back to liking mocha uson's fanpage, jose :^)

>hate pinoy when playing Dota
>like to talk to them when using Discord
mixed feeling

>using discord ironically

i hate non pinoys when playing dota

Tfw I havent played dota in 4 months

is she (((our))) guy?

please reply at me im desperate
you hate duterte right?

(You)

What are /asean/ approved pro-duterte facebook pages? I don't want the yellow media anymore

>duterte on foreign investors: GET OUT REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>duterte on china and russia: pls gib money

what did he mean by this?

>tfw no Philippine porn industry

you should have 1 desu
would pay to watch since flip soft porn are getting boring

I can make porn better than you

At what age do /aseans/ normally lose their virginity?
I'm 20 and still a kv

brit porn are usually when i want to laugh while jacking off desu

23 n no virgin

>find actually decent looking flip porn
>girl and guy do it lifelessly
>even the viva hotbabes shit has more effort in "make believe fucking" than actual hardcore flip porn

I fucking hate seeing maids and uggos when searching for flip porn

most flips in the US probably lose their virginity around 15
theyre all sluts and horny fuckers

With my bigger dick, girls orgasm will be genuine compared to tiny malay chan penis.

You should just be a trap slut

thats why you need porn industry desu
more pros for the industry meek out the lifeless shitty porn

[citation needed]

Will tatay du30 ban anime?

Malay chan crossdress and gets pounded in boipucci by me

try do 10 pull up, chin up

W-What ?~?

weakling

I lost mine at 11, feels great doing it at grade 5

He's pro Japan, he'll probably encourage anime instead.

Yea, our maid used to do that as well.

saving for mahal

...

Guess Im not going out on a drinking spree with my friends cause its raining hard which means more insane traffic.

>not drinking at home with friends
>while playing drinking games and cards against humanity

post the pregnant hotaru

Why play a crappy game when we can shitpost at Cred Forums together.

>cards against humanity
pls tell me how to bantz like a faggot: the game

Drinking is degeneracy anyway
Drunks should be shot too imo

I always wondered if there are any feelypinoys who speak spanish. That would be weird to hear.

kumusta

Puta

jk ILY

I only hate bule after browsing Cred Forums. It shows their true colour.

youtube.com/watch?v=oT9NoiQLSeo

Combine Japanese, Tagalog and Spanish = Chavacano dialect in the Philippines. My grandmother is Chavacano.

and English as well*

This, I didn't realize that they hated non whites this much.

>smuggled arroz
KEK.

Wow that sounds surprisingly very close to Spanish, I mean, I could understand almost everything. This means the day I go to the Philipines to retire I can get myself a qt chabacana speaking pinoy girl to fuck every day.

No. You trap slut

>gmanetwork.com/news/story/582413/news/nation/duterte-china-claims-over-sea-made-in-good-faith

Holy shit.

Heollo

Did u see spein?

Does anyone know what happen in Myanmar these days?

Can you even match my level of fabulous? I'm so fabulous that I lift my loincloth

Hello Sbitzerlend

You lift loincloth to signal nigger cock to come fug you

Im more worried about Cambodia or Laos desu

Heoll spein

I lik spein do you lik spein?

They're both fine. I have seen some Camdianons a few times.

Im speinesh so i haet spen

>it's everyone's fishpond
>meanwhile Filipino fishermen and vessels are being rammed by Chinese coast guard
>meanwhile China is building bases in the region
kek, I've never seen such c.uckness from a leader

>Argentina invades Falklands
>UK still defends its territory despite being insignificant

>Japan bombs Pearl harbour
>US chases down Japan to Asia and drops the bomb on them despite

>US invades Spanish Cuba
>Spain fought their hardest to keep their land despite their colony costing them more than it benefits them

Wy u haet spein?

Cuba was a province, not a colony. It was as Spanish as the Iberian Peninsula.

as in you met up with a Cambodian with an internet connection and hanged out with him?

thats nice.

I must haaet spen alwys

end yourself

...

Cute!

Test

where is that cute Singaporean girl from yesterday's Singapore tread?

I love you

>tfw doctor advises me not to make children because big chance of hereditary disease
>literally tells me just to adopt
Do you all sometimes feel like life hates you?

what did she mean by this?

It's better to adopt tb.h, adopt a baby girl and have 10/10 you will have a smarass daughter like Joel and Sarah from the last of us

>Want to pilot a jet as a kid
>Hereditary disease that can cause blood cells to burst
>NEVER EVER
Better to accept fate at an earlier age.

let's go to the Himalayas or the South American mountain ranges, onii-chan

But next year Langkawi airshow might have MiG-29 and Yurofighter simulators again, at least I want to get in and play pretend.
>tfw when the older sister already shoots a gun, rides tanks and play at the air force simulators before you.
Life is so unfair, I want to play with the Flankers simulator as well.
>captcha is a F-15
Why must google rub salt into my wounds?

I just wanna be taller.

wear heels

is your sister in the air force or something?

>shoot all drunktards
>Alhamdulillah
Does flip have gambling problem?

Shut up.

Maid Machine

>i dont want my sister sniffing my brief
you wish, pervert

>Washing machine. I've never seen or heard of someone doing it by hand
tsk tsk, that's just sad

>goes outside after four months riding a bike
>drives to the nearest park.
>everything go so well
>suddenly wild motorcycle out of nowere.
>turn around to dodge
>Flies off bike and landed on the ground and have bruises
I fucking hate motorcycles so fucking much

Nope, a diplomatic officer.
They might be required to work as a liaison officer between branches of the govt so part of the training involves several weeks with a lot of the branches to learn about them as well as training over the span of a year.
Paratroopers, police, armour, navy, air force among them, state enterprise among the.

>motorcycles

It's an Asean thing, huh?

>expecting his 4 months indoor """"""""training"""""""" to go well outside

you deserve it shitter

Washing machine and drier.
If the laundry is too delicate to be washed by machine, I will scrub it by hands gently.

...

DELETE THIS

>It's not very normal to say stuffs like "I love you" or "you are beautiful" here
i don't know i've never said those to anybody
hahahaha

Next time learn to do a superman before finishing HS.
Driving school "training" is of no use in third world countries.

eh, we usually say luv u brad! or luv u mahal playfully though

>Driving school "training" is of no use in third world countries.
>Not just paying for your license

Cops here deliberately fail you so that you have to pay the test fee again and again.

...

Indopedo has gone too far

>>>reddsit:zero

women couldnt just happy if praised with monotone words like that anymore
use a prose

>tfw the first and only time I've ridden a bike was on my license test
>tfw passed without a problem
What a fucking joke of a system, no wonder we get so many traffic accidents.

i thought Cred Forums users have thick skinned by now...oh wait this is Cred Forums

IT'S THE BEAT OF MY HEART

drive four wheels trust me its safer inside even if youre stuck in a traffic jam at least you dont fall and die easily like 90% of total bikefags
>tfw speeding about to reach traffic light while still green
>no cars around that time so some motrcyclst took advantage despite red light on his side of the road
>i end up hitting him hard at 80km/h while he flew away like superman
>left my car try help him out of courtesy. he was swearing and screaming in agony as hes leg is curved & broken
>call the cops and the ambulance and spent the whole day tending to this stupid problem
>the cop interrogated and concluded i wasnt at fault 1. the light was red when he pass 2. tht nigga dont even pay his road tax and no license
>i am entitled to sue tht poorfag and made his life even miserable

...

>break up with gf
>she will not call you abang from now on
Life is cruel.

I thought kakak was your abang.

...

find someone who could call you "Adik". the mature the better

>>i am entitled to sue tht poorfag and made his life even miserable
please tell me you did

you did right?

...

Duh, you think that impact he made is 'just a scratch'?

...

all girls are whores by default

We are corrupt but never experienced intentional fail, you need to fall off the ramp or knock over multiple cones to actually fail.
The system got nothing to do with Malaysians who goes 140-180 in the highway and disregarding traffic rules,rides on the other side of the road, mat rempit and irresponsible parenting.
If we went full draconian at least half the country will be without motorcycles or transportation and the country crippled with truck and bus drivers in jail.
Although I won't deny that JPJ is one of the most corrupt otherwise we won't go out of our way to screw them every chance we get. They deserved it.
Reminds me of a guy who rides on the opposite side of the road and rams into my father's car, cleaning flesh and replacing the bumper is not a nice experience.
>Wants to sue in court
>When police report and the whole school is witness that he is on the wrong side of the road.

The cutest!

...

In England passing your driving test on your first try is unheard of, this country is literally giving out licenses to incompetent retards like me.

did you sue him for annoyance fee too?

...

Should i vote for Ahok or SBY's spawn?

Ahok is our kin so him.

Haven't gone to England to know about their system but multiple tests will burn the wallets of low income folks.
Can't say I'm not guilty myself since I do not have license for tracked vehicles.

no such thing lol. my lawyer didnt mentioned anything like tht

thanks china

At least the current governor is doing some shit. The other candidates only offer their name and fame.

>tfw meet a whitey with a white guilt
>he Started talking how much of a disgrace his race is.
>literally have no pride
Why are they doing this to their own selves?

>literally got prescribed cuckoldry

lel

try exploit him into buying you lunch

that's why they stay with tourist visas and do visa runs.

Ride a bicycle everyday but make sure the seat is raised higher than usual, your legs should get a bit longer after a couple of months.

actually trying to convince him to start having a pride and at the same time guiding him to some good tourist spots with my car.

Pretty docile and a bro if you ignore his shitty white guilt

what's wrong with adopting?
that kid will still love you like a real dad

Cred Forums memes got to his head

well the real father probably has better genes than juanon anyway

>what's wrong with adopting?
There is nothing wrong with wanting to have your own child born from your genes, its just that it is still pretty cool if you are connected by blood.

Also, tradition.

So what exactly is this hereditary disease?

I asked what was wrong with adopting,I didn't say anything bad about having offspring

being a yellowtard X^D

being ugly

leukemia and vasculitis.

meant for

so its friday night lads, wat all yall are planning?
>tfw too feverish to go out, it started since morning

Sounds like a lot of work.

I asked her out to the movies and she said yes

I don't go out at night.

Not recomended if you are planning to have children though.
>literally bust your nuts

good,you'll never have to worry about aswang getting you

>FREE WIFI for all NAIA Airports up to 1GBps speed
>Naia passengers can enjoy free WiFi until Oct. 10

>Ninoy Aquino International Airport (Naia) passengers can now have unlimited high-speed WiFi access for free, at least until the Duterte administration’s 100th day in office on October 10.

Tfw I'll never experience 1GBps speed

>"user-kun what time is it?"
>"oh its around DU:30"

youtube.com/watch?v=HbKoXaIVO9s

> aku ****h prhatian
> aku b***h kasih sayang
> aku p*p*k p*p*k p*p*k
> ahh~ p*p*k

wkwkwkwk
good one gan

Someone edit the flag into some isis one or pic related

>be coming back from shop buying Indonormie, chippy and magic buscuits
>get on free uni double decker bus
>sit behind qt jap
>tfw she ask the guy next to her to take picture of her and her friends
>tfw I wanted to do that
UPRISING WHEN

also, good tune
youtube.com/watch?v=JG6x4MHdTWM

UK Uni shooting when?

>3 fucking hours in traffic

Fuck fixing drugs, fix the fucking traffic

The 1gbps was so last year even in mactan airport we have that

Its not that great tho

Abang=mas=kakak
Kakak was more widely used for Jakartafags. While Abang was more widely used for Sumatrafags, or Sundanese.

The admin claimswill still take 4 years to fix it even with meme powers

more like increase taxes on vehicles, make it harder for people to get licenses and encourage more public transport

tki ya lu?
kok bisa tau lagu-lagu dangdut house gini sih lu?
wkkwkwkwkwkwkwkwkkw

pengen ngentot tapi jomblo dan bokek gan

youtube.com/watch?v=-FOkm4P5pjo

eeaaa eeeaaaaaaaa

halah ngentat ngentot
ketemu cewek aja gemeteran palingan lu

Alright lads

>tfw called some guy on wc "mas"
>he asked to be called as "abang" because he's not old

Define "tki"
Learnt from my maids

tenaga kerja indonesia

>download movies probably in less than 1 min
>not that great

youtube.com/watch?v=BKgDcN6MH_Y
I love this indonesian meme magic

I hope they ban porn sites

fucking madurese man

wkwkwkwk

puritan scum

Ohhh wkwkwkwkwk

that is why you better pray that duts gets his emergency powers so we can watch the bankettas and squatter houses bulldozed away so we can improve the fucking traffic

Fuck them
they making me lose money!

wtf I hate Indonesia now

This. Make being a squatter illegal.
But he needs money to relocate them tho

What kind of nasyid is this?

youtube.com/watch?v=l3jGfeH0HE4

>posting 2011 meme

your meme games years too late

i-its new to me t-too

Why can't we just build some decent commie block apartments, then?

but its pretty catchy tho

It's not meme. It's classic and never gets old.
Post new ones plox

Is this your new meme, Indon?

youtube.com/watch?v=YF-tBVVumMw

>build cheap commie blocks for squatters
>city looks ugly as fuck
>earthquake happens
>cheap commie blocks have no earthquake resistant structures, so it collapses or cracks
>government now has gommie blocks that can't be lived in

Commie blocks look better than squatter piles, though.

>At least 1000 dead welfare leeches per collapsed commie block
I see no problem.

that is true lol

Guys someone post Comodo

>posting 2013 meme

i don't know the new ones
maybe lelaki kardus and cari pokemon

>literally KOHH wannabe
youtube.com/watch?v=WU54WpQNYic

I can't decide who I like more between indons or malaysians

Vietbros

MALAYSIA LA

malaysia

malaysians

Baru semalam gue habisin nonton filem Tenggelamnya Kapal Van Der Wijck. Pevita Pearce cantik sekali, mukanya ayu membuat aku terjatuh hati.

Lagi sekarang aku sedang nonton filem 5 cm, anjirrrr seksi banget deh Pevita Pearce. Kira kira masih dara apa nggak gua mau pacaran sama dia nih.

I decided it doesn't matter since we all love each other

Pevita itu cewek gue. REEEEEEEE

Pegi balik Indon la, booooo

pevita ada foto lagi pake beha doang sama temen-temen sma dia

Imaginasi jomblo loe

Malingsia loe makan tai sana tuh

Seksi banget sih dia. Gue perhati dia emang suka pakai tanktop

>indon trying hard to be nigger
>all those triggered comments

WTF I love Pevita now.

Lo lebih jomblo, bego.

How do I become like Awkarin?

pevita suaranya serek kebanyakan nelen pejuh

No its not even 30min

>we

haha alri lads

Hey please don't steal cool from us as well :'(
youtube.com/watch?v=TPj4xrD77BE

Live in Jakarta.

Fuck you, we love flips.

>Rap
>Millennials
Disgusting. this is not the Indonesia i once knew
youtube.com/watch?v=IpyxNne4odE

It will not apply on all squtters

>wuz

>we

Sama sama jomblo lah kita

Suara serak lah lebih seru, kayak Ayu Ting Ting

WUZ

There are some I've seen them they don't age awell

skuter dia gan
yang tau dia palingan bocah sd sama smp yang doyan nonton yutub doang

flip want to be part of clique too :'(

>"F-fuck Millennial I swear!"
>post millennial band
Get on my level you fucking faggot.
youtube.com/watch?v=2Z1nEnr3GME

This is basically treason

But its expected of him

...

A-at least your love songs are decent Gen y is not that bad but the current Gen z is start of the entertainment industries downfall. tht young lex vid is literally BLM of indonesia

youtube.com/watch?v=6L1_empGNvg
our own classic btw

...

Hello, gramps.

Hello Goy, hows the job hunt?

migrate

fuck at least we strongest race :_;

He only has the balls to kill unarmed citizens but when it comes to real enemies, a 13 year old babby is actually more courageous than him. I really wonder why this pussy terrorist isn't getting impeached/assassinated yet.

Will you Jakartans vote for our Lord and savior Ahok?

Indonesia lawrhh

90s music until mid 2000s is the best
no made up idol and make up bullshit
youtube.com/watch?v=IOC-GLs9TEw