Ctrl + f

Most people won't pay attention to them after the first few looks, specially when they get to know you

Source: I had enough acne to make up for the other 20 kids in class who didn't

so are mine
i get laid
i have friends
im a normal person

The time I was younger I had so Bad skin
And so many girls I was friends with
Now it all gone and I'm a pice of shit with no friends

I doesn't what what you look like but its not allaybe 30℅
Be a guy who you would be friends with
And you got friends in no time

-> is me

I know what you mean man, I thought about it today on the way home.

I personally want to become a musician because I think it's what I do best, once I'm done 'dumping' my music on the world, I'd somewhat leave a mark on the planet, I don't care about fame, money, any sort of recognition and benefits, I just wanna do what I think I'm good at so it won't go to waste and suicide will always be something to hold onto.

I think I'm past the point of "it's gonna get better", it's been shit for most of it and I don't need things to get better, I'd off myself at some point, but first I'd do what I wanna do, just so those 20 odd years won't go to waste.

Maybe you should be harder on yourself in the right way. Maybe you should let go of what you can't control and force yourself forward in a positive way. Or you can quit check out and slip into nothing forever like a bitch. Your call m8

pleasy reply to my post, im genuinely interested

I'm not worse than you
And you're not worse than me
It's not exist
You have your live and I have mine
It doesn't matter if my parents got killed and yours not
It doesn't mean I'm your better than me

Yeah there's these people.iny head who screams kill yourself but also this one guy who say please don't so it

If tried to kill myself one time
I was dead for a few minutes but I was found too early

I don't mean to be rude when I say this, but is English not your first language?

I know that people prefer confidence over looks and if you're interesting then people will like you.
It's just getting past the self depreciation and self awareness that bothers me and prevents me from being the likable me.

What if there's a lot of other guys in my class that are way more attractive than me, and they seem stupidly, but still, confident. Surely everyone will like them more no matter how interesting I'd be, i'd always be that guy to entertain but they will look at someone else the first chance they get. Like being a placeholder.
I've very low self value and I don't know how to change that, it takes very little for me to become self aware and till spaghetti starts falling out of my pocket

Use concealer and foundation. A lot of guys wear it now, usually for the same problem you have.

I'm 99% sure that im worse in every imaginable way except the suicide part

Does anyone knows about any narrative feels vid?

I'm the same way, maybe even worse. The only thing that stops me from killing myself is that I don't like pain, even if it's a second and then nothingness, I still won't have the balls to do it. I don't mean fear of pain as in a regular fear that all people have because pain is bad, but the thought itself makes me shiver. I've been beaten up a lot, I've fought people a lot, I've been through a lot of painful experiences, I experienced pain before, more so than more people I know. But I guess is the excess of it that makes me feel uncomfortable, guess it's a good thing since I'll be around for a little longer. But sometimes it feels like I'm hanging by a thread and I wish I didn't fear it as much as I do.

bamp

Shit doesn't work like that

I''ve been in the position you just described, and I've gotten pretty good friends and it was fairly easy to hit on girls (once I left my autism behind that is)

The key is to not give a fuck about the fact that there's people who may seem cooler than you. They really aren't, they are just different, and every person will like them differently, there's no preset

Pro Tip: try to hang out with some russian guy, always gets you places

i managed to get in more relationships when i was between the age of 4-10 then i have in the last 13 years....0 being in the last 13 years.

I just miss her

no way man, I'm extremely self concious, I'd feel even worse that way, i'd feel like they can see that I'm insecure and that's why I tried to cover it up. At least not covering it up means you don't care or that you don't see it as a problem. Choose your poison type of deal. I may seem picky but understand that it's not simple for me to accept things like that, I don't feel comfortable but things like this make me feel even less comfortable

I see what you mean. I just can't get past the point where I genuinely don't like things about myself to the point where I'm convinced there's no way others might actually like those things or at least accept them when I don't even accept them

man youre so fucking similar to me
i have the greatest irrational fear for pain
ive been beaten up a lot
ive fought peope a lot
is that just a schizo thing?

hi Cred Forums

Been talking to this girl recently, we got pretty close and a few times I thought we'd just go straight to dating because of how close our convos went

But as of late she's been a bit colder

A couple of days ago I tried to get her to come over to my house and play some Halo in splitscreen (we'd been meaning to do it since june) and she would just come up with excuses

At first I thought it was just unlucky timing, but then it all went horrible
>"user I'd like to go but I got no money"
>"what do you want the money for anyway?"
>"Idk"
>"Plan was just staying in my home, playing vidya and watching a movie, no money needed. but if you can't come then no problem, not like whining's gonna do anything about it"
I didn't exactly say that but it's the best translation I can think of
After that, she didn't answer.

That was 3 days ago, on these 3 days I've talked to her indirectly in some Whatsapp groups and she ignored me

Today I talked to her again and din't answer

I'm thinking of asking her if she's mad at me for something, should I?

Maybe try to start over
Maybe you are
But it doesn't matter
I fell like shit anyway
It doesn't matter if you lost 2 friends and I lost 1
That's the same fucking shit

I've been like that for a long time, key to success is ignore your taste, you may not like the food you got but other people might find it appealing

Yeah I got this too
I tried to kill myself one time but I got found too early
There are many guys in my head who screams kill yourself and one who say please don't do it
But this one are smaller every day
I'm not worse than you
Even if my parents got killed ore some other shit it doesn't matter
My life is other than yours
I already did it
I have a job someone would.kill for
I don't earn much money but enough and i do what I want
I don't know why but it doesn't help me

I tried
It doesn't help
It's not but I can talk English very well if I'm not drunk
And my smartphone is fucking bad with autocorrect
So excuse my bad English

but you see
i wouldnt care if i lost a friend
i wouldnt even care if my mother died
thats why my mind screams at me, because it knows i should care

That's called depression, you care, but your mind is numb for some reason (emotional breakdown probably) and you won't feel most stuff you know you should

Or at least that's my experience

no m8 thats called schizophrenia
it would go away if i took my meds

Wouldn't care
I know I should care
Choose one

There is a thing in your head that know there's something wrong
That's not bad it's good

That's the one you should trust
try to get this one louder

I understand that totally. But there are a lot of tinted moisturizers that are pretty much undetectable that can help. I think Mederma can help too.

its the one which wants me to kill myself

I don't think either of us are schizo, i think it's a more complicated psychological matter.

When I was growing up, things like beating your children was a common thing, and if your kid was to be given vaccinations they wouldn't comfort the kid, they'd hold you down and give you the needle even if you cried your eyes out.
School was another thing, being beaten for being a foreigner and shit like that, violence sort of gravitates towards you, from an early age it sort of sticks with you like a memory, an unpleasant one but its not just a thought, its sort of a cog in this mechanism and you think that without it you just wouldn't work. I don't know how to explain it clearer, but I think both of us got fucked over too many times at some point and now we suffer the consequences, willingly or not.

you surely must want something from life. What happens in your dreams that makes you happy? any thought comforts you? even if way too out of reach, maybe it's something to start reaching out for?

I see, it's good to hear from others what they think, even if it just lifts me up for a day or two. Something to think about.

I'll check out whatever I can, at this stage it's not even others looking at me, I want to look at myself and not be depressed about it

It's fine man. I was just trying to start a conversation if your native language wasn't English.

...

Yeah but I only does this because you want to feel bad because you don't care
So you want to punish yourself
You need to know that its not your fault you don't care
It fucking normal that you shut yourself off because of this shit
Try to learn to feel bad but get to get over it
Don't know how to explain it sorry

i dont know about you, you might be different, but im schizo, ive been seeing a psychiatrist for 2 years

just seeing the tumbnail makes me tear up

user, im 20 now and i have small dark marks on my cheeks too from acne.

Just put on a smile and laugh with them, they wont notice it and you will forget, first try to make some friends then after you feel safe around them, go for the girls. No worries man

i get what you mean, but listening to the "voices"at all is a bad idea which has gotten me fucked up more times than you can imagine
the problem with schizophrenia is that the only thing which truly helps is meds, which i dont take

We can talk brodie

may be, but realize that psychiatrists are people too, people make mistakes, mis diagnosis, maybe they're right, maybe not. Psychological matters can get very complex and sometimes effects can be similar with multiple illnesses.
Like exorcisms used to be believed to just be satanic possessions, when in reality it most likely was auto suggestion by something they've read or saw in the past.
Minds can be tricky, but give it a more in depth thought when you go to bed tonight, have a moment for yourself and try to figure out what might cause you to be what you are.
If I didn't consult myself i'd prolly be seeing a shrink too, but I've sort of figured out parts of me

In love with my best friend. She has a pretty serious bf and would never go near me in a romantic way.
Years ago I finally told her I liked her

Said she used to like me but didn't think I was interested and moved on. Never told her sooner because when we got mistaken for a couple and she'd shut it the fuck down instantly and say we're just friends. "user? god no! we're just friends"

We live far away and she came over to visit for the first time. she'd lay next to me with her head on my chest. Hug me from behind and rest her head on my shoulder. Always touching me when she gets the chance.

After she leaves I get depressed af and realize she'll never see me as more than a friend. 4 years and I still can't get over her.

inb4 pathetic beta.

OK sorry
I don't have schizophrenia but I have to take meds too
And don't take them because I takes the one thing away I like in my life
My mind
Before I hate that I can remember every talk since I'm 10or so
But since I had to take them I hate that I forget everything
I hate that I'm numb and don't want to do anything or be creative
It's my job to be creative but know I'm shit and probably get fired soon

it could be some complex shit if i didnt have so many symptoms of just schizophrenia, i would list them all but im extremely sleep deprived so i cant really put together a comprehensive story

Ive been meaning to talk to someone for a good amount of time. But it seems as if nobody cares. For 2 months now my 4 year gf broke up with me and she was the only person i cared about. Now my anxiety has grown twice as much and I have no clue if I should go to a psychiatrist so I can get prescribed anti anxiety pills because now every time I go to any place thats associated with her and our memories I feel like I cant breathe and I have these horrible chest pains. I dont know what else to do to b. Suicide doesnt seem too bad.

Anything you want to know?

I want to know what you do in you free time and how was your da

take some CBD (cannabidiol) it works as anti-psychotic/depressive/anxiety medicine
with almost no side effects

I'm 20 and I feel empty but still lustful. I live alone and spend most of my time likewise. I have a hard time being outside of my apartment now. I pass attractive people daily, being scandinavian I have no choice as 70% of all girls here are good looking. I am good looking myself, so I am told at least(I do suffer from self-hatred though, whenever i speak I get terrible images of how I must look, for in my eyes im repulsive). I cant be alone with another person without feeling stupidly lustfull, so I never do it. I'm a virgin and have not kissed a person in over a year. When I talk to a girl I get annoyed when she speaks, they never say anuthing intriguing. I am close to suicide now. I am going through the motions of daily life but I cant bear it much longer. Im tortured and creative, but I dont behave the way I want too, when I do people flinch and feel insecure about themselves, I guess I listen to intently and give signs of dissinterest if its boring. In any case to sum it up, I suffer from self hatred and im quite lame when im sad. When I dont feel sad Im to "interesting" for people to feel comfortable around cause my presence and act makes others feel lame. Im doomed to loneliness and this flame that could burn ferociously is but barely lit embers soon to burn out the last of its fuel. My advice is to see everyone as cringe, and then accept that as part of our nature. Good luck and live the life I appearantly cannot.

I got already some worse shit that doesn't help
But thank you very much for your help

As stupid as my advice may sound.
Live through it until you find another girl, billions of people out there man, this girl isn't the only one. Sure, memories hurt but you can always make new ones. 2 months isn't enough time to move on from someone who you've been with for 4 years so it's understandable how you feel, what can i say... wait and see, find distractions, move on, life doesn't end on one relationship. I've known people who were super happy with their girlfriends, almost got married, then called off the wedding and now he's seeing another girl, if he could do it then what makes you any different?

...

I wouldn't recommend it, because it is a drug, but ectasy/mdma might give you a super dose of happiness, maybe something will re-wire in your brain since it'll think you're capable of being happy? theoretically it might work but do a bit of research on it before you do anything

That is true, I want to distract myself with things such as school and random hobbies I am picking up but she pops up into my head right away. It feels almost as I am being tormented. But no your advice didnt sound stupid at all. And maybe you are right, maybe I do need to just get through the hard times. I just hope this shit doesnt build up to something that is much worse.

I smoked a few joints
I was happy but it's not for a long time
Just a temporary solution
Never tried any other drug and don't want to do it because the thing I got from my psychiatrist are enough
I don't like to take things that change you there's no med where you get happy and nothing else happen

Any help, I'm this user

You're a lost cause, user.

Hey bros? How's everyone tonight?

Just gonna drop a little story here for anyone interested. Hope y'all enjoy.
>be me
>in my sophomore year at that time
>be in a group of 4 others which consisted of girl I mentioned, an autist, a black football stud, and another chick with a big ass
>sit next to the girl that interests me
>we joke around a lot, hit it off great
>since I know what I'm doing and do very well in school, I become the chad of the group and call the shots
>Football guy doesn't stand a chance is already "just friends" with the girls

>fastforward the next day
>the joking and shit between me and the girl has become a bit more physical
>Really feeling her,wanna smash so badly.gif
>says to the group that she will be busy tonight, won't be able to complete her tasks
>"user, can you do it for me? you'd be my hero" she says as she leans her head against my shoulder and looks in my eyes
>fuggg
>of course I acept
>Then football stud drops the ball
>"Oh what? Gonna be with your mans?"
>laughter from football guy and big booty hoe, autists is doing fuck knows what
>I become cold inside
>Crawlinginmyskin.webm
>Become more quiet for the remainder of our time together and pull out of this "relationship"but I do a bit of her work anyways
>lead the presentation of the project
>after that, I never talk to her again thinking that I'll just be hurt if shit continues and avoided contact with her

>fast forward 3 years later
>single, black yet /fit/ and still no gf
>thinking about what could have been and still see her roaming about from time to time.
>get depressed.
>trying to find my "final solution" to end all suffering

I wanted to know what makes you happy? And in my free time I like to think about pointless things that wont matter and paint. And my day was alright, yours?

I would try to talk to her directly
I think you're at a point where it doesn't get worse because she doesn't talk to you amyway
And if it's get worse it's not your fault because you tried to do anything
I think it's a bad idea if you don't try anything

Look man, I've been through something similar. Longest depression of my life, 3-4 months I've been in it. I liked this girl, some people interfered and fucked things up, 4 months i waited to explain myself and she was having none of it. I thought I was in a hole that I wasn't gonna get out of. Sure enough, a new girl showed up in my life and my focus shifted just like that. Whenever I think of the other chick I still feel a bit of anxiety, like it didn't have to be that way but fuck it, she's gone off with someone else and I've moved on myself, hardly ever see her anymore which is good, who knows, maybe I'll find someone that's a ton better than her and it'll make me think "I can't believe I wanted to go out with her".
Things that hurt, always hurt, some longer some not as much, but all pain can be recovered from in time. Just keep distracted and you'll be good, don't think you won't be because then you deffo won't be

Ask her if she's mad, apologize, and leave it at that. Don't keep making the effort to talk to her if she's going to ignore you.

thanks for tip, I guess I'll try

check'd btw

I know this way to well. Happened to me with a girl I used to be "close friends with" back in highschool.

Once she starts avoiding you, it's time to pull out. Move on and maybe she'll start missing you and come back or some shit.

There's no point in beating a dead hoe.

Pharmaceuticals are meant to drown out the feeling until it's gone, like an air freshener in a can that only covers up the bad smell but doesn't get rid of it.
There were cases of mdma where people felt genuinely better permanently after. I'm not trying to push it on you tho since I had a rather bad experience with mdma myself but people are different, my friends do it constantly and enjoy it each time, i'm just not much into drug induced happiness, but in your case it could be beneficial from a medical perspective

I'll def do that, now I only have to figure out how to say it in spanish without sounding autistic as fuck

Now nothing makes me happy
But before it was painting and be creative I'm general
I tried to do anything
Learn new things doesn't matter what
And just to appreciate the small things in life
But now I can't and don't know why because my life get better since I "tried"(was dead for a few minutes) to killyself

Had to do many things at work but not as bad as anyone else here

Leaving this here and going to sleep, see you in another baww thread Cred Forumsros

...

Fuck dude you are right, a decent amount of people have told me I am attractive so I think ill be good. It just sucks to move on, I wish things didnt have to be this way. I will honestly always have hope that she'll come back. Ill stay distracted. Maybe talk to a therapist.

...

...

Then you need professional help and drugs. You're either a person who suffers from a mental disorder and needs help or you're a bitch. Either way you're stopping yourself from being happy.

Have you tried going to any type of licensed professional about your mental health?

...

I know you want to help me and I really appreciate it
I heard this too but I had Friends who tried it to get the result you speak off
I'm fact one of them was my best friend
Now they can't to anything than take drugs and do everything for it
That's the reason i don't like it and got a fear that I will end like them

Just got home from the bar.
Took some mdma, talked with a homeless man from Finland. He talked about the winter war.
I cant stop thinking of his generation.
Now im at home alone smoking weed on Cred Forums.
So fucking lonely.

Don't apologize to anyone ever unless you fucked up bad. It is your admitting guilt and looking weak no one likes someone who is weak. Just pick yourself up dust yourself off and try to move on man that's all you can do. Easier said then done but doable.

Hey guys, it's OP. I've to go now, it's late here but cheers for staying up, much needed talk. Hope I helped out some of you and thanks to those who helped me. Sorry to those I didn't get around to but we've some people around here now to take over and maybe they'll help.
Think positive and we'll get through it one way or another.

I need this thread Cred Forums. GF of a year and 4 months just broke up with me. I'm just sitting here passing the time...

Yeah after I tried to killed myself I had to
After 3 month they say I'm healed
I was for a few a few month but know it came back and I don't know what to do because I don't want to go back or take meds again

The last Russian I partied with liked starting fights in bars. Never seemed to turn a profit

Thank you

Did the meds help in any way? And regardless of what I say youre still going to kill yourself?

It helped but not in a good way
At least I think it's not good
The meds make me numb
I don't want to do anything in this time
It's like you work automatically
You don't think at all
I never liked this because its the only thing I got when I was alone before
I know it's paradox because that's one reason i don't want to live anymore
But it's true
You don't realize what you have until it's gone

Yeah I think so
I don't say if anything really good happen I still want to kill myself but it has to be one really big thing
And I had wait too long for it
For me it seems it's the right time now

...

Man I know how you fell all too well. I had terrible acne in high school that would not go away and my mother wouldn't let me get on any sort of script for it so I was just fucked. Luckily I didn't get any scarring but It ruined any chances I had of getting with hot girls at the time.

Fuck that makes me not want to take meds and well regardless I want to say that where ever you go pal, that it is 100% better than this hell hole. I might be joining you in the near future

It doesn't matter, if it's just scars it's not that bad. If you have a well shaped face you'll look good no matter if you have scars and acne, if your face isn't well shaped you'll have an ugly face no matter of the acne. You're not in high school anymore, start acting like an adult.

hey boys i need some help.

>be me, 19 y/o college fag
>gf of 2.5 years breaks up with me in april of this year
>all summer long im sad and lonely
>last week, get back to uni
>see this cute girl who is on the golf team
>she is german
>3.9 math major
>aryan
>i grow some balls and talk to her
>get her contact and we set up a date
>im so nervous i can barely sleep the night before
>we go to a vegan place cuz she has lots of food allergies
>talking to her, date going great
>she doesn't want to leave, but has class
>i get her number and we part ways
>text her later that night about how i had a great time at lunch with her
>ask her if she wants to do something similar nest week
>MFW 24 hours and no response

She's fucking Chad. She'll call you when he dumps her.

Haven't been here in weeks. Guys my gf of almost 6 years just asked me for space. I pushed her too hard. I was pressuring her because for the past few years I've basically carried us with money and I'm the only one who drives. I'm 23. She's 20. I have a full time good paying job and she's in community college working at an ice cream shop. As much as I have been so angry about feeling tired of making all the contributions, I love her more than anything and now that she wants space, I'm ready to either just give up on life or give up on life. She said she honestly does believe we can work out lter but she just needs time to heal from all the mental stres I've put on her. She really thinks we can work it out. But this never works. Right? Need something to hold onto to be able to keep living my life. Help. I have no friends. You guys are the only community I can possibly think of to reach out to and I know that's sad. Help.

> it doesn't matter
Well why are you writing this if it doesn't matter man, it obviously matters. Anyway I'm going to bed so rip I guess. I'll press f for you user.

Should've raped

That's not what I tried to say
In the time I was there I saw many people that got the sense and it helped
100℅ since today
I want to be honest I can't say you will be happy but try
I did it too and it didn't help but I can say I tried everything
It's better to give everything and loose than loose before you even begin

Maybe it is maybe not
But it's my decision not yours
Don't be like some one else
Do your own thing
I can say I had a good life
I tried everything
Please don't go before you can say the same because that's regarded

...

she is single. i checked

Are you retarded?
I want to say it doesn't matter to help me or say I should kill myself
But good night anyway

holy shit dude I'm so sorry. I got a similar letter like that back in high school. That shit is the worst. Luckily there are lots of girls out there and the fact she wrote that to you means that she might still think highly of you. Maybe she has a hot friend?

I have a schoolmate who had the worst acne I've ever seen to this day. Now he's got scars (obviously) but also has a hot Gf and friends.

Forgot to say thank you that you talked to me
It helped in a way
A few years ago I would really appreciate this never less I will never forget you
That's

...

It's not mine, I saved it from a thread a while back. But it brings lots of feels related to my ex (I'm pretty much over it though). Thank you for caring, user! I hope you're doing okay!

I don't know why I spent so many hours in threads like this. Life is shit one way or the other there's no point in whining about it. I know that I don't care enough to do something about it but at least I'm not sad anymore, I'm just disappointed in everything including myself.

No problem, I just wanted to try to help. Hopefully you can feel better in anyway. If not then everything will be okay.

I lost my job today. It wasn't bringing in significant income, and it wasn't the best thing in the world, but it's still bothering the shit out of me. They didn't say why other than I wasn't needed anymore, which to me feels like a way to tiptoe around "you did something wrong". I don't know. I feel like shit.

I have to go now sorry
I wish you the best for your future
I wish there are more of your kind
Good night Cred Forumsro
And thanks

Finally I will do an hero!
Can't wait for 4:30

After I found out I'm a misanthropic asocial fucktard that hates physical interactions I wonder why I still feel like I want someone to love. I don't enjoy being with people, I don't enjoy conversations, physical interactions beyond handshakes or feel awkward to me. Still I find myself hugging my bedsheets and dreaming about having a Gf/ wife. What the fuck is wrong with me.

What makes you happy?

Who /drunk/ here?

This girl I dated for a year and broke up maybe six months ago while I was in recruit training for Air Force. She's absolutely perfect, funny, down to earth, most beautiful smile, great body, fucking crazy in bed and just. I realised I want to spend my life with her, so I sent this and this is her response.

I fucking wish. Can't believe I have to wait another year to drink but I could have signed up to die in the army 4 years ago, and I can legally be held 100% accountable without question for my crimes 2 years ago. Stupid nigger government

21st birthday I'm buying a 1.75L of Captain Morgan.

Acne sucks, but it isn't the worst thing in the world to happen to you. What I suggest if you're worrying about making friends and especially not impressing women then just fake the confidence. If you already have confidence then show it; through being the most confident person in the room you can be the most attractive .

long distance gf doesn't seem to want to hang out much anymore, which is fine and i've been giving her some space, but also the time apart makes my feelings diminish because i have to force myself to love her because borderline sociopath.

when i talk to her she says she loves me a lot but i'm not sure if it's still worth the effort to be so attached to someone who i only get to talk to briefly a couple times a week.

end it? i am a lonely and desperate social reject and i do love her - we have a lot to talk about when we do talk and when we spend time together i feel more connected to her than i've ever felt with anyone else. we're perfect for each other and having her makes life almost bearable

Bruv it's 24 hrs not 24 days. Not even a week. Maybe she's busy sucking dick? Nah but serious, give her some time.

Don't do it, you'll regret it

Sounds like you're in a little pickle. You love the girl you say, but you're admitting to putting her under mental stress? It's a good thing she thinks you can work it out, but you're going to have to decide whether it's more important stress her out and care about your paper or if the relationship is more important? Give her some time, wait for her to talk to you and try to refrain from the stress/mental shit as that'll fuck anyone up.

but is it worth going days feeling like i don't matter to my favorite person before she reassures me that of course she does

it's a fucking rollercoaster, so much easier to just not care

Cool. Finally I'll be at peace.

Well shit. No one ackknowledged either of my comments, so might as well go score some heroin on the streets to make myself feel better.

...

That sounds like what happened with me and my ex. Distance put a strain on it, plus with me not trying hard enough to visit her due to laziness in a sense, but I also expected a lot. The times apart our relationship kinda floundered, but together I had the best time with her and I loved her so much. I'm starting to look at the relationship and think maybe it's for the better we're not together anymore, but the thing that kills me the most is the fact I might NEVER see her again. That thought alone is just depressing.

All I can say is if you have a plan to move closer together or be together more then FUCKING DO IT. Don't do the same stupid shit I did as I regret that nearly everyday. Not even nearly, it is everyday.

Of course I am, I'm lonely and depressed and unemployed and too poor to go out anywhere. And I realized last week I'm in love with one of my best friends that I can never have. So I'm sitting here with a tequila bottle, a bag of weed, and a half pack of smokes. Ran out of the more fun drugs weeks ago. Fuck it, this is good too right. What's life without completely falling apart sometimes

>remembering being 2

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Which comments? New to this place getting used to it.

That sounds exactly like me. Always wondering if she still loved me the same as yesterday or last week. Don't overthink it. Just don't, it'll eat you up and destroy your relationship.

I'll just re comment here since it's easier.

First, lost my job today. It wasn't a good source of income but it was work.

Second post was replying to someone, saying how much it pisses me off that I could have signed up to die in the army over 4 years ago but I still can't legally drink in this shithole.

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Why can't you have them?

it's actually interesting to hear that it floundered while you were apart but was good while you were together. usually people i see in ldr's act like everything is wonderful but i wonder if anyone else secretly goes through that. i think i'll ask around more.

and i'm so sorry it didn't work out for you, hope things get better man

Fuck your job. Think of it as an opportunity for you to find one that makes you happier. Create a new you(?). If not try and get the job back, although that depends how badly did you bite the hand that fed you?

My brother committed suicide.
My phone broke today.
Possible tumor near my uterus.
No one to confide to.
At least Cred Forums makes me feel better.
Every year goes by quicker and quicker here.
At least we have each other, in a way.
Right?

What can ya do. Just pick yourself up, dust yourself off and look for the next person. Already have my eye on another female, but after what I felt today, it kinda tells me I might not have the best chance, but there is still a chance lol

Nah there's no getting the job back. I just got a text this morning "we no longer need you at our facility". It kinda had a tone that sounded like I did something wrong but they didn't say that, I don't know. They probably found some pushover to do it for less money.

She was dating one of my other best friends. I'd be dead to him and it's not a friendship I'm willing to burn like that. Plus it's almost definitely not mutual. I need to just accept this great platonic friendship and not fuck it up i think

i'm sorry friend

Suicide is horrible, but I've never experienced like that in my life before so I can't give you the slightest bit of advice for dealing with that certain type of death in the family. Although I lost my dad when I was young, but since then I've discovered I'm incredibly good at not crying in sad situations, so instead I make jokes. Phones come and go, materials are always renewable. I keep my fingers crossed you don't have tumours in your uterus, but if you do then keep people up to date and I'm sure one of us will stumble across it and cheer you up.
Here for a bit, so if you want to talk then go for it.

Look for a better job, mate. Find something that makes you happy. Use whatever money you have on you and travel or do something fun? Treat yourself and then sort your shit out.

if she fucking loves me so much why won't she talk to me

Well if you feel like it's only platonic then I have to take your word for it as I can't really say any different for obvious reasons. Find another person to fall for, it's crazy how quick people can move on when they have their mind set on someone or something else.

>So, honest to God, I was raised in an orphanage.
>People never believe me because my life sounds like a cliched movie script.
>I actually get very angry and upset when people make jokes about this (literally triggered), so I often invent stories about where I grew up.
> However, to the best of my knowledge, I was found abandoned as an infant in a basket on the steps of a nunnery.

cont ...

What do you mean? Explain it? How often do you talk? I must've not caught that part.

It wasn't the fact that I lost my phone but every single text, photo, etc. between my brother and I.

I'd love to take a 3 or 4 day weekend camping out in the woods, and ban myself from using any electronics. It'd be a nice little getaway, but I have no camping equipment. Although I guess a set of camping equipment can be had fairly cheap.

I moved across the country with my mom because I couldn't stand the weather and shitty memories of childhood in my home state. I'm still living in her house because I only have like $800 in my bank account right now. Not even enough for a month's rent at most places.

I'll definitely be looking for a better job, but I suspect it'll take at least a few weeks to find a better one.

>Contrary to heartwarming specials on ABC Family, living with nuns is NOT easy and it is NOT fun.
>No, we never sang musicals.
>Yes, we were beaten with rulers incessantly for the slightest error.
>If we were caught with anything like CDs or toys that were deemed "inappropriate," they'd be taken immediately and never returned.
>Oh, and when you misbehaved seriously, you were put in a lightless broom closet in the basement until someone remembered to let you out.
>I only spent the night there once, but I'll get to that part later.

cont ...

Mhm, yeah I can see your point now, I never thought of that. Perhaps depending on what phone you have, maybe there's a way of getting that data back? Like I know Apple have the iCloud? How about looking through old family photos if you want to see your brother and you together again. The other texts and photos may have been absolutely awesome memories, but you can always create new and better ones.

Don't take the meds it's just a new justification for practically cuting out chuncks of your brain it's freezing barbaric and I hope it becomes iligal to mute great minds

Well if you don't have the money then make a promise to yourself that you'll do this camping trip when you eventually have it. From the sounds of it you're seeming very positive about the situation, through believing that you can get a better job in just a few weeks which is already sounding great from my pov. Also don't get torn up about the job you lost. Did you even enjoy it? If you didn't then think of it as them doing you a favour and giving you the shove for you to achieve more.

i need to cry gimme some feels pics

Why didn't you invite him in if your so god dam lonely

>So the nuns were mostly stern, devout, and remorseless witches (except for one sweet beauty), as I'm sure everyone can imagine.
>It didn't help any that all the other kids in my class seemed to hate me
>More cliches, I know, but it was probably because I always got the best grades and always knew the answers to every question.
>Admittedly, this also meant I got paddled less, so that may have played into it also.
> But I made friends with the other outcasts, like the fat kid, Chris, who once got the dungeon treatment for stealing Oreos, and Ben, the only black kid in the class, or for that matter, the whole convent.
>Who I hated most, though, was Ted.
>The nuns all loved him, as he was a professional suck-up.
> The one class he did better than me in, the only class that mattered, was bible studies.
>Ted must have memorized every chapter in that stupid book, and the women at the school gave him special privileges because of it.
>And for every ounce the teachers loved Ted, Ted hated me.
>You see, the whole pious thing was just an act.
> First it was just physically bullying me, but I held my own against him most of the time, so he switched tactics.
> He started lying about me.
>He'd tell Mother Carly that I was making faces at her back, or Mother Elizabeth that I'd stolen something of his.
>Who do you think they believed, EVERY TIME?
>Yup, I'd get a beating or have one of my possessions taken from me.
>Of all the nuns, there was only one who'd ever take my side, though mostly it was a neutral position.
>Eventually, I had too much.
> I beat Ted so mercilessly that his face never fully recovered.

cont ...

Why not look at something that makes you cry? I used to cry at a scene in that silly Adam Sandler comedy 'Click'. If you want to know which scene it was then I'll tell you; maybe you can laugh a little at silly old me, well young me at the time.

>Why not look at something that makes you cry?
that's what I'm looking for

>you had friends

I know the feeling though.

>only half-spic in middle America, family is poor, teachers hate your mother, teacher's kids in your class, Catholic school

I was treated so shitty growing up they called the feds on me because they thought I was going to rampage on prom.

I want to be held I just want contact with a person

The most physical I got was a person in my block has a dog and I pet it from above the fense on my way to school

I need some help please

I liked it because I worked with animals and I liked seeing them in the morning. But it was kinda back breaking bullshit nonetheless.

iktf, i was so disliked comparisons to me were used to bully other kids

>tfw never hugged a girl before

can you get your own pet?

Dubs knows.

Trust me... This is me
And it was honestly the biggest mistake I made, the distance makes you feel like they don't care but trust me they do its just difficult

No my landlord is anti animal

dubs to the dubs power!

LOL yeah I know. I never phrased it properly. I meant look at something that has previously made you cry before like a really sad film.

> I slept that night on a cold floor in a room so small I could barely lay down in the fetal position.
> I had no lunch, no dinner.
> I said earlier that it was just one night, but it could have been longer for all I know.
> There was no time.
> Just hunger, darkness, and dread.
> After however many hours, I was freed.
>The light, despite the dimness of the basement, blinded me so that I couldn't even see my liberator's face.
> My nose worked just fine, however, as I could smell the delicious chicken meal that was brought down to me.
>After I blinked away my tears, I saw her, the one nun who ever seemed to care about me

Idk if anyone is reading this or if I should finish the story

Also, I'm an old fag so I don't know if schools are like this anymore ...

cont?

Look for another job that works around animals? Maybe become a vet, if you can deal with the sad parts.

Yes please

Any sort of violation towards children whether physical or non-physical is deemed child abuse. School will be shut down if they still do this.

I'm reading it, mate. Continue if you so please. I must say maybe you could turn into a writer and start your own book. You have a way with words.

What's her name, Cred Forums?

already done i dont cry because of things like that much anymore i want to change that

Nah I have another job, kinda. It's only working like 3 or 4 days a month. It'll take off some day though. Right now I need a job to fill in the rest of the free time.

TFW I asked her out

Fuck, man.
I'm sorry. I'd hug you if possible, but distance is a bitch.

Maybe it's some sort of emotional block. I have the same thing. For the life of me I can't cry. I seem to well up a little bit, but I just don't cry. About helping you with crying, I unfortunately can't suggest anything else, unless you want to hear about the sad scene I used to cry at in 'Click'.

fuck that. just end it right then and there. no mas

getting sick of working like a dog for fucking nothing but to mearly exist

oh shit

Well that's an achievement in itself you had two jobs at once. Good going. I for one don't even have a job - I have education instead. Well the only thing that's a shame from you losing your job is seeing the animals. What would you like to hear from me though? Is there anything in particular that you'd like to talk about maybe?

thanks

I just wanna wake up in our apartment and in our bedroom. And just say this was all bad dream.
Just to see you smiling looking at me as were both waking up. Going through our morning routines, kissing each other before we both go to work, just to be anxious to get back home and spend time with each other.
I miss you every day and there is nothing I can do to bring you back.
>after laughter comes desperate tears

oh shit indeed

I'd give you a hug, mate, but two things; I'm online and I'm a guy. I'm sure we could find some girls to give you a hug though. What's your age?

> I'm an adult now and that's all behind me.
> I get flashbacks from time to time, but I've actually been in contact with a couple members of the old gang since then.
>The fat kid Chris grew up, lost weight, got fit
> The black kid got locked up for armed robbery/attempted murder
> The other few friends grew up to have (mostly) normal lives.
> Sadly No one knows what happened to Ted though
> I'm married with a lovely wife, 2 kids, and an average middle class family now.

Just let it give you comfort that a femanon would hug you if possible.
Maybe it'll make you feel better.

how long dis gun take

Thanks man. I'm not much of a writer. but I still have these memories so vividly it's easy to write when it feels like ... late at night ... I'm still on that closest, alone and hungry with no one that cares about me.

17

What's your Kik before you get b&?

flockinell

Well yeah technically I had 2 jobs... but I was working far less than 99.99% of people with just one job.

dont have kik

F

>never had much of family
>father was an abusivedrunk, yet still somehow better than my mother
>never had any friends
>had a girlfriend for a year and a half, but that was a long time ago

Basically just roaming this earth alone. why must I suffer like this

Are you the guy who has never gotten hugged, flockinell or?

Very it's great how it ended up for you. Sounds like even though you got the shitty stick as a child you've managed to make the most of it as an adult. Maybe what happened to Ted is what happened to Joanna Lumley in Shirley Valentine; basically she was a kissass and bitch towards the main character (Shirley), she was expected to do great things whilst the MC (main character) wasn't expected to achieve much. They end up bumping into each other later on in life and it looks like the kissass had turned out to have a fantastic life until the MC asked her what her job was which turned out to be a lady of the night. They spoke about how they envied each other etc, etc. What I'm saying is maybe he envied you because you were such an intelligent child and the only way of conveying this was through spiteful tactics. It's getting late now and I'm rambling, but maybe you get what I mean, maybe you don't.

sadly, yes

> 35 and live at home with my parents
> never married, girls stop talking to me when they discover my 'roommates' are my parents.
> haven't been laid in 3 years, and even that was a pity fuck

So Fuck all ya'lls problems. You don't even

Realize that regardless of our action, we all leave this place.

You were able to hold down two jobs. That's better than nothing, who cares how often you were at them, you were able to manage two different responsibilities. If it doesn't feel good to you, it will feel good to your CV, mate. Also don't discredit yourself.

Fam I lost my virginity at 18, I know people who did it at 19, 21 and even 26. You're going to get to cuddle, MANY, MANY girls. Look at Hugh Hefner, he was a late bloomer, but now he has managed to have any woman he so pleased; to an extent.

>black kid locked up for robbery/attempted murder.

I'm sorry user but a lot of this is hard to believe. Sorry for being another normalfag

PayPal.Me/ParkerCruz
I'm sad :(

Why do you feel like you're alone? Have anyone significant in your life? Friend? Pet? Something?

Ask her, yes. I'm familiar with how you're feeling. Asking her if she's mad at you will either result in her confirming that she is - which would suck but at least you can go from there, the not-knowing part is absolute torture - or possibly her realizing that she's been cold towards you and things get better.

I know that it can be a bit scary to ask, but I promise you it'll be better than torturing yourself continuously trying to figure it out on your own, or trying to fix it when you don't know if there is something to fix or what it is.

Hope it goes well user. Fingers crossed for you, just remember regardless of the outcome that I love you, there are people here for you to talk to and you're going to be okay.

I never fit in anywhere, so no friends. all my life consists of is going to college, going to the gym, playing video games, then sleeping. repeat for x number of years and it starts to wear you down

fuck off

>26
>average job
>live with mom because she's disabled and needs help
>no friends
>no gf
>will probably be alone after my mom is gone

No special story here, just a nobody.

no thats someone else

mother fucker your lucky your parents let you stay with them.
Mom said heres 1st months rent for a new place PEACE!!
that was after 3 days of moving back...
So yea

With that attitude you will. Think positively.

just made one is panzerfusilier

You have potential man.
Just know time is short.

Low self-confidence so you make up for it with going to the gym? Fair enough, not a dig at all. I don't know what you look like, but say you've gymed for a while then you're gunna probably look pretty good. Go out there and chat to people, make friends in college. What are you good at? Are you funny? Clever? What is it you're better at than anybody else?

>I am going through the motions of daily life but I cant bear it much longer.

I know this feel

I know about how hot Scandi's are. My ex was Danish; absolutely beautiful. I'd suggest you go and talk to someone, like a professional, they can help you. Being completely honest you sound like you have something potentially wrong with you, more than likely something you can get sorted out after talking to the right people. Choose to understand your problems and make them your strengths instead of using them as an excuse not to live your life.

Well you just about hit the nail on the head with the low self confidence part. idk if there is anything that i do better than anyone. I know im good at faking and improvising on the spot, but thats about it

>tfw you realise you were born into economic slavery

Most people have probably been there where they self-loath. My advice to you would be to try and get some confidence, if you have to then fake it, but before too long it'll come naturally to you.

Improvising what on the spot? Lies? Jokes? Conversations?

That's bleak. Keep thinking like that and it'll more than likely end up like that. Law of attraction 101.

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I've felt with acne for about 6 years now and I'm on my 2nd course of Accutane, I've already taken one full course of 6-9 months of it, my acne came back but scared and it's bearly going away on my second treatment, no one notices and at least you don't have acne anymore, I will have it my whole life, don't let this ruin you

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its more true than you care to admit

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i wonder if i would be who they think of too

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try asking?

he would say yes but who knows if it's true

Then try. If they say no, yeah you will feel a lot worse. But what if he says yes? And don't be like me, pic related

Feels

I got to admit that fucking sucks, but everything happens for a reason, and you'll find someone else