When's the last time you had sex?

When's the last time you had sex?

last night

Two weeks ago.

Broke up one week ago, partly because she started putting out less and less. Fuck that noise.

Last month, long distance sucks

ask your mom

I have sex with a new girl, usually from Tinder, like every month. It usually lasts a couple weeks. I'm about to meet up with a German Au pair, and probably date her for a year if I can though. Or at least through the fall-summer

never :/

this bitch better fuck me tonight if she does then tonight.

nerver, i don't need sex

This morning

cute young blonde. am in excite, haven't been with a foreign girl, especially Deutschland master race.

A little over 4 years ago.

Like 8 months ago

My gf is giving me a blowjob while I'm typing this.

Smart move.

In a nearly sexless marriage.
If I didn't have a side piece I would go insane.

2 nights ago
coulda had it last night but too sleepy

hey can someone tell me how you get those marks on the skin? I know its from the mouth but what exactly happens there and on the neck to leave a mark?

It's been a few months.

[undefined]

About a week ago, because my dumb bf is out on some business trip across the globe
I know he's doing it to make money for us but still is lonely

Idk I just suck on their neck a little bit... Don't bite but get the skin on your teeth as you suck... That's what I did anyway. Like a really sucky strong kiss

Never....

has yet to happen. I'm in my mid 20s (meaning: never)

why would anyone want to do that?

They like showing their passion by potentially giving people blood clots that can fuck them up.

is this real? you can't get a blood clot from regular bruises

Two days ago. Sure my dick felt good and I nutted but we're married, our heart rates didn't even increase. She had her headphones in, she might have even slept through it, I dunno.

zozzle

months ago

You do know that a bruise is clotted blood under the skin right?

creampied my receptionist about an hour ago.

but you can't get a venous clot that could cause pulmonary embolism or stroke from skin bruising

If the bruise is large enough and you happen to bump it again, there is a small risk of those things.
My original answer was a bit hyperbolic, but that's because I find love bites like that silly.

I regret not "spreading it out"...had it ALL in my younger years...

5y ago :(

when i came out of my mother's vagina

my penis touched her vagina when i came out. that counts as sex right?

Yesterday. New girl I met online. She's already begging to see me tomorrow. Don't know if I'm going to keep her but I intend to have fun with it while it lasts.

you came out. you're supposed to cum in

I fucked a hooker on my vacation in Bulgaria on August 13

Seventeen months. Broke up with my last girlfriend after almost two years, went on a couple Tinder dates that didn't go anywhere and just... stopped.

Saturday night. Never heard my girl moan so much, it was crazy. She kept saying " The sex was amazing "

Almost 10 and a half years. Time goes by quick.

Last night, Mrs is away a bit so got it in before she went.

like 2 days ago I cheated and I feel bad

Two weeks, one day, eighteen hours, six minuttes and twenty-one seconds..........

Saturday was lit fam. Bitch had a bruise on her chin apparently I tried to bite it off. Man I was fucked up.
Sunday was better because I actually remember the sex. Fucking and pizza all day. Today can suck my ass though

Like 6 years ago.

almost six years ago, still think about her

I am a lonely fucking neckbeard

Almost 4 months, my girl isn't interested that much in sex

This, but then I'm married so I have ass on tap

Today, twice. Oh and a blowjob that finished in their mouth.

Ah.. it's good to have a gf.

9 days ago. being married sucks.

Never.

Really? Been near a year and my gf wants it like 4-5 times a day.

Sadly we ditched condoms, so I creampie her a lot.. gonna be a young dad soon.

two months ago. me and gf are breaking up but neither one can afford to move out. so just waiting for the lease to run out

May 2015
At least I'm being honest

2 Months ago.. damn

Saturday with my 90lb 3.14 QT asian wife of 7 years. We have only been fucking about once a week though...

wtf, pull-out at least. Birth control is cheap homie, dont ruin your life -_-

don't do it. coming from a guy with kid #3 on the way.

although, nothing like delivering the creampie.

last time i saw my gf which was in June. long distance sucks

December 13, 1998

Last night with my hand....or two days ago with my girlfriend.
Things aren't great at home

Kekd

Punch her in the stomach

>gonna be a young dad soon
The next 25 years of your life are going to suck hard because of something that's completely avoidable - and you're just like oh whatever.

What a fucking idiot.

september 2000

I hope you won't be a dad soon user, I'd really like a girl like your gf.

This morning.
And probably in about two hours.

It's fun fucking a pregnant girl.

How bad is it user?

>Calling people idiots
>Having sex for procreation

Choose one.

1 year, 3 months

Never

When I was 0 years old.

november 2013

never...

underrated

A couple of months ago with my ex

some months ago. frantically looking for a gf on dating sites. bound to fail...

Gonna need a look at that profile, son. I'm having a shit time even just matching.

Also maybe I just need to be better looking.

Wtf ... same for me.

Are you a fat girl by the way?

nah, meng. ima fat guy.

He pretended to be a girl

I know that feel bro

Gawd I totes am, we must of fucked.

Ruptured blood vesseles, like a bruise

Yesterday

This morning

Like 2 weeks. Me and my gf are working conflicting shifts :(

Yesterday evening

never

I'm so lonely

I fucked my married ex girlfriend last June. She's had two kids so the pussy wasn't as good. She had that desperate horny stench to her. Made her tell her husband about it, too much of a cuck to leave her slut ass.

Go to /soc/ but basically just be attractive and learn to take nice pictures and be funny and charming and interesting and smart.
Otherwise, get cucked, sonny. go to /soc/ for help. try to look like youre just joking around with Tinder, too. not a try hard.

>go to /soc/ for help

Kill yourself quickly Chad.

May 22 2003. I remember cuz it was my 23rd birthday, my first time and it was a prostitute.

2 or 3 weeks ago I had sex with an asian chick. Wasnt great, I dont get all the hype with asians on here.

Fuck man not since July 2nd. Hooked up with the hottest girl I've ever seen in my life via Instagram. She stayed at my house for a few days, it was so lit. Turns out she's an actress. Does super low budget b grade horror movies like zombie strippers and shit. Being a single dad, I don't get out as much as I used to, tinder doesn't work because I live in a super tiny town. That girl only hooked up with me because she was here on vacation and I follow her on Instagram and mentioned o live where she was going for vacation. 11/10 grill. Would wife no joke.

Holy shit hope its true

/soc/ can help you, you just have to sort out the stupids from those who are obviously right and disciplined. It's your own problem either way, befriend a chad and have him help then.

8 days ago

Last night.

Yesterday

Saturday, random girl at club. Not bad.

What year is it?

over 3 years ago :(

All your troubles seemed so far away??

6 years ago.

AT LEAST YOU FAGS HAVE HAD SEX

Never.

None of your fucking business

500+ days.

Saturday

No, actually it was with my girlfriend so you can say I was pretty much inside "my troubles".

Still solid sex though. Pretty sure I m gonna break her cervix one day.

this morning

AHAHAHAHA! Not finishing in the mouth every single time. Pleb

3 years shitty relationship then i left school/got a job/got a car/new pc

Was way too wooried about unemployment/new job to think about it then realized i had to use dating websites to meet newgirls since ive been around every group of friends

AHAHAHAHA! Not getting a blowjob at all. Pleb.

I got your reference user

technically last night, i ate her out and then jerked off onto her thighs.

now to wait 2 weeks for more hanky panky!
>sigh

this morning

Picked up a girl at a club Friday. She spent the night and the sex was mediocre at best.

Not EVERY Asian person is the same, you dumb fucking shallow retard.

cringe

Last November. My current gf is celibate.

What's the point of even having her?

June last year :(

this

Last week, meeting my FWB later tonight actually.

Last Saturday. First time.. I'm 30.. once a wizard, always a wizard.