my life is a fucking disaster and I can't believe I'm whining to Cred Forums but even if this thread dies scared and alone I'll have put these words somewhere
everything I try fails and with every failure I sink deeper
I feel like I'm drowning
Maybe it's learned helplessness or maybe I was born an unlucky person
I live in chaos, I can't remember the last time my mum was sober after 11am
There was never a time when I wasn't treading on eggshells, knowing the sudden, unpredictable onslaught of nasty words, crocodile tears and jerky violence that would follow if I took a wrong step
I'm told I'm loved but all the love is misplaced, my own parents say they love me in a drunken stupor, or to get me on their side in a debate, or to guilt trip me
My friends would turn on me in an instant for their own sake or over something petty
The world around me is just flying past me, I don't interact with it
Words come out of my mouth but I don't hear them anymore
My life is happening and I'm not around to see it, my mind is caught up in a whirlpool of misery and stress
Time moves too fast
I wouldn't mind if I died, it doesn't look like it would change much, a lot of the time I lean towards it seeing as
This is what it feels like to be completely alone.
I'm not even screaming, I wouldn't even notice if I did, just another event to get caught in the wind and to be spun out of reach
NOTHING HAS ANY FUCKING EFFECT ANYMORE
My life is a fucking disaster and I can't believe I'm whining to Cred Forums but even if this thread dies scared and...
Its all you're perspective man. I've had a terible month (which I know doesn't compare to your life) But I know that this BS that I'm going through is going to make me stronger and more of a man. I know your struggling, I know things are tough, My mom is an alcoholic too. But look on the bright side, you can leave those fuckers and become some better than both of them combined. I'm knida envious of you because I didn't have it that bad and you're probably gonna be stronger than me when you reach my age, I'm 26 btw and I'm guessing you're somewhere in your teens. But hang in there man, everything that happens is impermanent that is the law of nature. Nothing last forever no matter what you or anyone else tells you.
Dude. We're Cred Forumsros. It isn't whining dude, we have a duty. If you ever feel like shit, come talk to us. If your friends are that shitty, they aren't your friends. Fucking stand strong, you are your own person, and you know what? You're cool. Now go out there, meet a nice girl, and build your own life. Don't let it be governed by others.
Dude. We're Cred Forumsros. It isn't whining dude, we have a duty. If you ever feel like shit, come talk to us. If your friends are that shitty, they aren't your friends. Fucking stand strong, you are your own person, and you know what? You're cool. Now go out there, meet a nice girl, and build your own life. Don't let it be governed by others. Good luck user.
Giving hope to Cred Forums
fuckken gay
> time when I wasn't treading on eggshells, knowing the sudden, unpredictable onslaught of nasty words, crocodile tears and jerky violence that would follow if I took a wrong step
yeah that is a fucking problem. how old are you? because
1) you've been trained into codependence
2) it won't get any better
3) you need to not just leave, but get therapy.
I'm guessing you are in HS, so probably not too much you can do at this point. but maybe go to some Alanon meetings - they are free.
post balls. no homo.
Kill yourself in an elaborate manner, leave scathing indictment of friends as suicide note, livestream suicide.
Stop being a whimp. Stop caring about your parents. They only want you to get wealthy.
Here's a blueprint for success.
1.You are going to get your fucking garbage body in shape.
you will sleep 8 hours every day 23:00-7:00 and will stop using computer 1 hour before bed and will avoid parties, drinking,smoking, weed
You will start eating protein rich diet complemented with vitamin rich foods and proper carbs - i.e. omlet, maccaroni, meats, chicken etc etc etc. Just google for proper diet.
2. you will buy a gym pass and will go to gym 3-5 days a week with no excuses. You will be tired, maybe your friends will want to jerk off together.. anything - you will tell them to fuck off and will go to gym, where you will work out intensively and will concentrate on your legs, back and chest (no doubt after you got this all, you'll be smart enough to read about training regiments online).
You will do 1 day squats and deadlifts with a lot of weight and will continue exercises when you feel you can't.
2nd time you will do back - rows and pullups
3rd time you will do chest - all types of barbell and dumbbell presses
4th - you will do arms, shoulders, abs
This will push tons of testosterone, adrenaline, dopomine and growth hormone into you and you will geel GRRREAT (see, it's a Tiger tony reference, we're all pals here)
Remember - you must feel like the last repetition in exercise will almsot make you vomit, you must NOT want it. And then you must just get over it and do it.
This is the secret, why some people stay losers and some people find lifting addicting. Guaranteed after it's over you will feel like god.
3. You will start every day with 5 point exercises to get your fucking stupid head filled with mmmm so nutrious blood - 20 situps, 20 pushups, 20 pullups, 20 abdomen crunches/leg rises, 20 lateral rises (don't have dumbbells, use books or jugs.
remember - consistency is the key. Keep doing this for exactly 1 month and then adjust. Pyramid everything up.
it sounds ridiculous but I cried after reading that
I've never talked to anyone about this before and didn't expect any sort of positive response
Thank you for your support
TL;DR
On the codependence thing, my mother is a raging narcissist, she denies being an alcoholic while drunk every time I confront her about it or slaps me because I dared criticize her. I've been aware of this for a while but I can't figure out how to stop it without getting myself into shit
I'm pretty young and I'm just worried that leaving will fuck up my life seeing as I have no one to stay with who knows what my family is really like, they'll send me right back
Thank you for mentioning the Alanon meetings though, I'll look into it
4. Fuck friends that don't keep up with you. Real friends will stay, and if those quasi-friends leave - good, you actually won, by excluding unthrustoworthy people from your life.
5. You need a job quick. Either take up studies or go right into working, but watch either for places where you can make a career, or where good contacts (basically anyone rich) walk around.
Fuck fun. You will get more fun than any dweeb who spends their 20's drinking. You want work and money.
5. Spend your free time working and the left of it - attend local small business meetings and startups - maybe you are not a businessman, but being around these highly motivated people is like an illness. And you will get sick mad motivated, cunt. And maybe will decide you want that money invested into cool shit.
6. Travel. Regardless - with company, alone - just travel around - fly, bike, drive somewhere for a week. You need all that to get your gears going.
Trust me - do this and you will be like tank and at one point suddenly will realize what you want and why you are such an awesome person. . No bullshit this works every time and can all be achieved in 1 year or less.
I am not selling you anything, I am giving you advice, so there is no point in not listening to it.
I was a complete beta loser and just forced myself to change.
Maybe I am slightly high and blabbering too much, but this all is good fucking advice.
do it. right now.
Exercise, work, travel, business.
Your first aim will be to bench 100 kg and to spend 3 days near sea in a tent. C'mon soldier, go go go go!
I would fucking personally carry you through this, op!
Just fucking man the fuck up! Like for real!
beat your chest and say - I am a man and I fear noone! Literally do that. Like a gorilla.
Loose yourself in this primal sense to find yourself!
Yeah do this shit bro. If you can't control anything in the world control your body. Self discipline and exercise is yiur pathway out of this.
this guy knows what he's talking about, this shit is hard to get into but i guarantee without failure that it would work. you just gotta keep telling yourself you're a fucking mad cunt and that you're doing good shit for yourself and you dont give a fuck about others
Go fuck yourself, gym-rat.
You're just a fist-fucking narcissist.
and once you get motivated and mad awesome cunt, you will feel how easy it becomes to be cool - your brain will produce the most wonderful jokes and romantic phrases on its own.
The second you will hit that - I feel good, like James Brown on coke - once you get your life together, you will feel free and INSTANTLY become socially cool.
Guaranteed. girls will go to you, guys will want you around.
It just works.
Grind - get good - get fucking hulked up - feel good - live good.
I went from nobody to the best, so can you. I'm not a little overconfident cunt who has seen too much rap videos and now thinks he's hot shit, I actually grinded my way up.
From rags to riches. It takes work ethic, consistency and trusting that what you do will be the key to make it.
Eat a bag of shit.
This shit is just masturbation.
Good thing that not everyone wants to be you.
Congratulations, you're free. You have nothing holding you back from going anywhere in the world and becoming whoever you want.
Gym has nothing to do with it, but it sure helps getting your physiology together - if you are depressed you probably have really screwed up hormone levels.
Exercises and daily regiment is the straight line way to change it.
Well, or prescription drugs. Though what you are aiming for here is not just changing the state of your mind - you can git good in life by consuming tons of adderall or amphetamine or coke if you are a millionaire. But that's shit.
You want all your loose strings to be tied together at once - you want looks, feels, mentality and overall motivation - sorry pal, but the truth is - gym is simply the perfect place for that. It's all-in-one cheap, instant solution package. Beginner alpha definitely should do this.
Or join army. Though being yelled at that you are crap for the first 2 months probably will just make sad people even worse.
Sorry, last time I masturbated was to finish in some random girls mouth.
Thank you for your advice, but I don't have a problem with my physical appearance. It's just that I have a social circle filled with fake friends and people who couldn't give a damn about me, but we get along and act like we give a fuck because that's the way to survive right now. If I find someone who I know will care about me, I promise I'll drop the rest
I don't know if it affects other people but when I go home only to find no comfort or anything human and real it just kills me
It's basically a vicious circle, maybe not caring like you say will help
I'm an overachiever and watching my grades spiral downwards, especially when my parents couldn't give two damns, makes me even more insecure and feel even more helpless
I really liked your advice about acting like a mad, untouchable cunt though, I'm definitely going to give it my all and try, thank you anons
Not the guy you replied to but go fuck yourself. He gave out some legit advice while you're the one posting scat, just kill yourself weeabo cunt. Absolutely disgusting.
Advices have nothing to do with physical appearance. you will not become Arnold by doing this.
It is to straighten your head! To get you pumped for action, so you can WITH MUCH EASY get rid of anything you dislike in your past.
>Much Easy
will be the name of my future custom protein shake kek