Ask a hearse driver / body pickup anything

ask a hearse driver / body pickup anything

How big is your wiener? What's your favorite film? Fav animated series? Fav ice cream flavor? Fav food? Do you prefer furry or shaved vagina? What is the meaning of life? Fav youtuber? Fav animated series? Fav TV series? Fav band and music genre? Do you listen to funeral doom? On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being the highest how would you rate yourself in appearance? Do you eat the Booty? What are your fetishes?

Can you show us your brown eye?

not very big, Simpsons movie, south park, chocolate, cheeseburgers, shaved, making the best of it, hodgetwins, alter birdge, classic / hard rock, 6/10, i eat booty, no feitish honestly

Ever have a dead body release a huge, loud fart and you actually LOL?

yeah but only during the pickup part, which is when the hospital / coroner release the body

Do people really void their bowels and bladder when they die? Is that all the time or do people just do it some of the time?

What's the most fucked up shit you've seen on the job?

Have you picked up any famous people?

ever get lost?

a family arguing over who would be paul bearers at the end of the funeral, fought in mid carry, dropped the coffin, 17 year old blonde chick (car accident) almost fell out..only white trash.. (im white trash as well)

Ever open the castute and look at the body?รท

yeah the body breaking down is no joke, bacteria completely takes over..nasty shit if not taken care of asap.

Was she hot?

only driven a mayor & LT. Gov, but no celebs

If she's, do you check it out? Any pictures?

very, but like white trash hot ya know, skanky yet cute. she was pregnant too..boyfriend was and still is in jail for a drug charge, couldn't even see his kid or girl one last time.

When you fuck dead chicks do you bring your own flowers, or do you use the ones that are there?

yeah i have no choice, need to know i'm picking up the right person! accountability in the funeral world is pretty shitty

How much do you get payed?

Weird. I do the same job.
Do you work for a specific FH or are you trade?

I've thought about fondling before but i dont wanna get haunted in all honesty

what's the most attractive corpse you've ever seen?

Does working with dead bodies and grieving families fuck with you after a while?

trade! i'm in Chicago so business is pretty good but we deal with whites more so than black. Car accidents & illness rather than murders

How much does a nice caddy hearse cost and how reliable is it? I want to get one for cruising. I thinking late 80's or early 90's

*pallbearers

You get pretty numb after awhile but every now and again there will be some family or person that makes you give a fuck, I get depressed with teenagers who had a bright future ahead of them more than anyone else.

What's it pay, hearse user?

$12.50 an hour, not too bad but could be better. Christmas / Thanksgiving bonus is usually $1000 - $1,500

Don't ignore my question you rancid swine.

I'm in Columbus, business is brisk here too. I'm trade as well. We do more whites than blacks also, the black FHs use a different service.

I don't do many accident scenes tbh, mostly hospice, hospital and nursing homes. Coroner does the messy work.

Thank you. Sorry I called you rancid swine. I just wanted to know.

you can get decent 1960's ones for as low as $3,500..if we're talking 2016 - 2017, 100k +

Are you paid that for being on call?

Man I get $50 a day and $25 a body for on call work, plus mileage which adds up quite a bit.
I'd love to get hourly like a regular human.

no problem haha, i don't buy a lot of shit so it's decent..actually moving on soon though to mortician, that's the real money

Yeah the black's have a much different way of services, usually a lot longer! but the reverend's do put some spirit into you, i'll give them that.

if it's after working hour's I'll get $25 - $30 from the family usually, I don't even ask..so it's nice to know some people still think about you even while they're grieving

Yeah I've driven a hearse for a few black funerals. They are definitely more entertaining.

white's are kinda straight to the point, I had a service last 20 minutes once ( keep in mind around 300 people came ) i closed my eye's for 2 seconds before my boss knocked on my window like hey its over!??!??

>favorite movie
simpsons movie
>favorite food
cheeseburgers
>white trash

gee we couldn't tell

24 year old kindergarten teacher, looked like angelina jolie..baby blue eyes though..boyfriend slit her throat for threatening to leave after abuse.

i fucked a 4th cousin once too