Holy crap

Holy crap.

So, I may have just fucked up.

>working 70 hours a week
>just finalized divorce three months ago
>ex-wife travels six months out of the year for work, I work from home
>obviously this means ex-wife must have full custody of our 3-year old daughter
>noooope
>two lawsuits later and I'm paying for a nanny to do what I normally do all day anyway to "settle the judge's doubts about a father who works from home giving a child the full attention they need"
>no mention of ex-wife not, oh, I don't know, FUCKING BEING IN THE COUNTRY
>nanny 1 sent by ex-wife's company service? Russian who does nothing with kiddo. Fired two hours into the work day.
>nanny 2? 21 year old No Habla Espanol. Fired without even walking through the door
>nanny 3? I hire, picked a 23 year old child education BA studying to be an early education teacher while getting her Master's in Comparative French Literature
>IE, this woman is never, EVER getting anything above $19 an hour in the real world, so nanny it is
>I have the house, the dog, the MIL apartment above the garage, and the three cats while ex-wife is in Hong Kong
>the one thing Judgey said is that I should not bring another woman any time soon, blah blah blah
>wife already threatened to call CPS on me and lie about abuse, fortunately I got that on tape
>nanny does all the laundry for us, my office is next to it. Have told her not needed, but she does it anyway
>one night I'm working late, she comes in asking if I need anything
>offhand say "a solid hour of sex and a full body massage, plus a good half a bottle of scotch" as a joke
>next morning find a bottle of scotch in my office
>timeframes increase a bit here and there, but short version is I'm loving having her here
>a little chubby, but has great tits, French/Vietnamese girl with amazing eyes
>ff a week
>keep working late, have to in order to pay what nanny is actually worth - she's teaching my kid French, Chinese, and Japanese

Continued...

go on op.....

>last Monday, tuck daughter into bed, read a story, sing songs, etc
>go back downstairs to do more work work work
>throw on cans and crank music loud
>feel a *thump* behind me
>see nanny in thong panties and sports bra changing out laundry and folding while watching TV (the MIL apartment door is open, laundry room is between my office and the MIL entrance
>obviously knows I can see her from this angle
>is turned away from me
>folds laundry like that for thirty minutes, gets up, stretches, then goes away for ten minutes
>fuuuuck me, haven't had sex with anything save my hand in a year
>realize I don't need this shit right now, so go to close my door
>walk out to door, she's in the door staring right at me
>we close the doors with eyes locked

Continued

Bumpin

that pic of her OP?
Stop asking and just post OP. quit being a faget

Old pic, seen it posted here many of times

cont please.

>This shit I do not need. I do NOT need a girl 15 years younger than me in my bed.
>but fuck I can't even think straight
>last night I say fuck it, I'm sitting in the office working through paperwork
>nanny's door opens
>don't see her, don't think it's anything big at all, must have just been imagining all this shit
>get up to go to the kitchen
>turn around the corner to go back to my office, whack off, and go to bed
>literally bump right into her
>whoops
>pick her up and stand her on her feet, ask if she's okay
>yep, and she's in a robe, not wearing bra underneath it
>she just takes a deep breath and then lunges at me and kisses me
>I have had ZERO female contact like this for literally years
>so obviously, we wind up half-naked in my office, she gives me a blowjob, and then I wind up fucking her thoroughly, multiple times, on the couch in my office
>does she come back to my bedroom? Nope, she tells me she has to get up early tomorrow with kiddo
>what the hell
>tonight she doesn't bother with any foreplay, just walks across naked and sits in my lap, starts grinding on me
>when we're done she says "I need to take Friday off so I can go break up with my boyfriend in , otherwise we have to stop doing this"
>now I'm having a full on panic attack
>on the one hand, somehow I lucked into a woman whose sole ambition in life is to raise kids to be healthy people
>on the other hand I still have no idea if she's even on fucking birth control
>and on the last hand I did everything the judge fucking told me NOT to do
>and the nanny is aware of it
>so now I'm wondering if this whole thing is a setup
>or if I'm just that fucking lucky and have to play this very carefully
>my kid responds better to her than her actual mother within two weeks
>but if ex-wife finds out ANYTHING about this I'm beyond fucked

Pic completely unrelated

>>In b4 walking t rex
>>In b4 tree fiddy
>>In b4 spideer mahn
>>In b4 Fresh dindu of welfare line

Op you're a fag...get to the point.

No judge would ever tell you not to have women over (in a legally binding way). Either this is BS or you are taking his "advice" too seriously

Lucky fucker...
Plz cont...

This, also it sounds like you found a good woman, just sit down and actually talk it out like a mature adult

Check my dubs of truth, people.

Last:
>just got a text a few minutes ago from nanny
>says as long as she can be up before little girl wakes up in the morning (this kid is up by 6 AM every. Goddamn. Day) she doesn't mind me fucking her all night long, but she can't drive.

Now here's why I'm fucked, people.

>I'm fucking a woman 15 years younger than me who goes down on me in nothing flat
>she's fit
>she has tits
>my kid fucking loves her
>she's everything my ex is not
>I can easily pay for four kids to go through college by myself, no help from ex
>and I've got a hot Eurasian chick who wants to get on it relentlessly

So do I pay my nanny for the job she does or do I transition her to live-in girlfriend / fuckbuddy with allowance and HOW IN THE FUCK DO I KEEP THIS FROM MY EX-WIFE?

>just sit down and actually talk it out like a mature adult

Classic meme bro

tricky situation
judging from my experiences with females it'll only end up bad

>inb4 ex finds out
>kid's away
>nanny doesnt give a shit

Well I read your dumb fuck story and first of all. It seems the judge was kind of right that you didn't spend much time with her considering you're doing 70hour work weeks and you don't seem to play with her much. Second I don't know why having a new girlfriend impedes in anyway with taking care of a child, you're allowed to get her a new mommy if you want..

double dubs?
your just lucky cont fucking and see where it goes.
life is all about ups and downs.

Nanny will take you for a ride, and leave you broke.

You fail to realize the judge's gender.
>he
Yeah no such luck.
And it's not "have women over", it's "have a woman over in a sexual capacity". She has a point; kiddo is already confused as fuck about women who aren't her auntie.
>my 10 yrs younger sis teaches college twenty miles away and has dinner with us every Thursday
>sis fucking LOVES nanny
>sis also still talks to ex-wife
>so it's going to come out eventually if I come clean to sis, she's terrible when it comes to anything remotely resembling "don't tell X person this shit"

Unrelated, but apparently this is what I'll be doing the rest of the night.

Sorry, not really asking for advice here, /bros/. I'm more or less processing exactly how fucked/lucky/shit-for-brainsed I am.

Yup that part of the story is total BS or misinterpretation

Ah. See, I'm doing the 70 hour work weeks from home, which means I work full time, then do the extra as a consultant on the side to pay my lawyer from the divorce.

This isn't a long-term situation. Eventually this will all shake out and I'll be back to the standard 50.

I'd recommend asking these questions to this nanny/lover of yours, she's obviously the one you need to be consulting about all this. Seems like she's down for whatever and she's got your back, she'll keep her mouth shut for a year or two if it means good sex, a loving father/future husband, and financial security.

thats advice, its not binding. Obviously you are not to fuck women in the same room as child, but not judge can order you to not start new relationships.

Now if this is real, your major issue is.. make sure that nanny isnt going to fuck you are over. You are her boss and senior, she could get you in serious trouble.

She said she had a boyfriend before fucking you so she probably is a bit loose on morals. I mean at least she broke up with him before continuing with you but I'd advise caution since she's clearly open to cheating. You might be the next boyfriend she dumps when she finds a better ride

Dude, she's 23.
Let me remind you, she is 23.
When I was 23 the only thing I was thinking about was fucking all night long and doing the job in front of me. I wasn't considering long-term consequences.
Nothing she's done has given me any confidence that she's got anything other than a serious fetish for older men and/or a gold digger mentality going on, and TALKING has not been at all what we've been doing since this all started.

sauce on those incredible fun bags?

If you weren't such an idiot, you'd say this to the Nanny. She'd likely be flattered and yet understand your difficult position.
Maybe she keeps it on the DL until it's okay (how long did the judge say, btw? You can't be on probation forever) or maybe she can't do it and leaves.

Either way, you should probably exercise direct communication rather than asking strangers in the internet.
And play with your fucking kid.

So talk to her then you fuck, also what do you do for a living

No no, she's heading to his home city to do this in person THIS weekend. Not before.

Like I said, I may well have fucked up and let my dick do the thinking for me.

Fuck off.

6AM - 8:30 AM - breakfast / family time
8:30 - 12:00 PM - work
1PM - 5 PM - work
5PM - 8PM - family time
8PM - 2 AM - work
Repeat at 6AM
go fuck yourself.

the judge had you pegged
slept with her a few times already planning her moving in
i bet you've got your anniversary marked on the calendar, calm down there son remember she is still going seeing her boyfriend, take things as a gift, not your next ex wife

this. got a cs degree n no job since june

I'm a data analyst and program manager for a company, and consult on the side for NGOs working in the Middle East.

So you're a sand nigger?

So you're a camel jockey?

You need some blackmail options, just in case. Seems like you can afford a private investigator. Get her checked out man.

CS degree won't do shit for your career without the talent and drive. I have a degree in English literature. I switched to business analytics and specialized in linguistic analysis across social media platforms to predict demographic reactions to potential events.

Short version: I tell companies what they should say on Twitter when shit goes down to save their asses.

Basically,

So you're a Cario coon?

Samefag, thanks but no.
100% American Irish-Scottish-German-Swedish mutt.

You don't make money on blue chip oil stocks if you don't have a strong notion of what's going on with OPEC.

Have fun, but be safe, and keep it on the downlow. Tell her if she loves her boyfriend to break it off, but if it's nothing serious to just have fun.

im really motivated. ive programmed whole services and uploaded them to github openly, its like a portfolio for developers, and ive applied to about 70 places since june.

i just have 0 experience and no one wants that. even junior jobs ask for 2+ years experience. i just list relevant course work.

This being said, one of the best fucking times I have ever had was in Iran.

The more repressive the government, the less inhibitions their women have once they know they aren't going to get stoned to death for taking it up the ass from a Western infidel.

Do you deal with big data?

Sounds kind of odd, have you went to Cred Forums for advice?

a judge can't say you can't have a relationship
That would violate your civil rights

Were you applying for a job with my team, I'd ask what you had in the portfolio to show me.

So if you have something that you did that's just straight-up fucking cool, you should highlight that.

You don't think moot got a job at Google just because he gave the Internet's tardlings like this guy
a place to prove how many times they were dropped on their head as a child?

True. It's not an order. It's a heavily worded suggestion for a temporary arrangement.

And speaking of, it's time for me to go make more utterly idiotic decisions with a woman young enough to be my daughter from a really stupid teenage pregnancy. OP out.

yeah, they said to apply directly to positions instead of through indeed/monster/dice/etc. and for the last 15ish applications i have done just that when possible. i find the posting on indeed, then search their site and apply/email my resume directly through their site.

ive read just about everything on the web on how to structure resumes and cover letters since i've had so much free time since june. ive been connecting with guys i graduated with to either let me know of openings or work on a side project to throw on github.

if your story is true, you should consider cutting off the sexual stuff. she is already cheating on her boyfriend, shes the kind of person who will fuck you over.

just try to casually end it by not having sex anymore. don't give her any bright ideas.

I got a boner reading it

And then you said that with 23 you only wanted to bang, now I'm a few years older than that and I hope I can get back to such a horny bastard again.

Thanks mate, you reminded me of who I am.

coolest thing i've done id say was in a senior project for a satellite company. setup a near real time monitoring of all their satellites broadcasting across North America. they had 500Million records in their MySQL DB from May 2015 - Sept 2015 so it was cool dealing with a huge dataset and getting data queries and graphs to display from 4-5 hours in their old tool to 5-15 minutes in the tool we setup for them

So you're a towelhead?

So you're a q-tip top?

So you're a raghead?

This is a joke right? Your telling me you cant date/sleep with whom you want? Its a free fucking country. Get full custody and tell ex to fuck off.

Did you try applying there? Say something like hey remember me I turned your 5 hour thing into 15minutes? I feel like you're fucking something up to not get a job

So you're a sand monkey?

>sounds good and all but be sure to have a backup plan

>never trust women. Tape everything that might have legal consequences.

>have fun while fucking her brains out

>fuck the law. No authority.

You missed out
>Aunty and uncle in Bel-Air

I felt the same way like 2 months ago. i updated my resumes and cover letters. sent em to buddies to proof read and everything.

now i just feel fucking hopeless. worse thing i have is a 3.24 GPA. the last physics courses fucked me hard along with the last calculus course.

They werent/arent hiring. Our professor kept saying, 'if you want continued development on this project, itd be ideal to possibly hire a student from this project.'

>a little chubby, but has great tits
>she's fit

Make up your mind, my man.

Why are you not allowed to have sex with an adult woman if there is consent?
Why can't your ex wife find out? She is allowed to date other men now right? Just like you're allowed to meet other girls.

OP, it's clear what you have to do... pay some triad member to murder your ex in Hong Cong.

Go fucking kys srsly faggots. this is about fucking the nanny aflfeck style so talk about your pussy issues in another thread mofos and get a real dam job that doesnt pound on a keyboard all day

Lol OP, you lucky bastard. But lemme tell you one thing.You have some money, and the nanny has your cock.
Nothing wrong about fucking another girl after a divorce. I mean, you ex-wife probably did several times even before your divorce. You must feel free and complete, so enjoy OP !

But dont relax too much. If you make lovely nanny sad, break her heart or screw her up; she will make you regret this. And your feels will be wiped out. Look how she knows to be sweet to your daughter. Means she also knows how NOT to be. Be careful user, and have fun with eurasian boobs :^)

Duck the police

So you're a terrorist?

Nope, but I can build a protocol using three off the shelf services that automatically floods a Twitter account when keywords and phrases are used.

If I gave a shit about politics at all, Trump Jr would have been shut down with hundreds of thousands of #skittles

Lesson: Don't marry. Ever. Underestimate relationships. Fight modern progressist feminist system. Be free.

What the fuck has a judge got to do with your sex life?
Can you not fuck someone and keep it quiet for say a year or so until things settle down?
Why does anyone need to know anything?
Either thus is bait or you have zero common sense
>you keep fucking that nanny
>you don't have to tell anyone
>your ex works away?
>your ex has been unfaithful to you multiple times
>she's even swallowed black man's seed
Now sort your head out and get banging

you need a better lawyer, the judge can't order you not to have a relationship. Also fucking the Au Pair is as American as surprise buttsecks. It is the white mans burden to sex the hired help, you are just doing your duty to god and society

Your only two real options are to get rid of the nanny or put a ring on it to make everything kosher.

If you marry her, get an iron-clad pre-nup. If you fire her, get a replacement nanny who is your mom's age or older.

I agree older women know how to fuck and keep it quiet

Le sweater puppets. Chesticles xD

OP, just don't leave a paper trail and all is fine. Kid doesn't know, no text messages incriminating anything, and everything done or said about this deal is hearsay. You're just nervous and scared because this is all new. I get it. I have full custody of my daughter for two years now and her mom is malicious as fuck. But al my worries have mostly come to be only worries. If you like this girl, talk to her about and see where she stands with things. If it's a relationship coming from it, the courts won't bat an eye. And I was also given the same suggestion you've mentioned.

hey dubs, dafuq did you do to your lawyer that he sold you up the river like that?

hire her as a fitness trainer and get your lawyer to stop the nanny and no girlfriend bullshit

You haven't fucked up OP.
Make sure she's not gold-digging you.

What happens if the ex-wife and judge find this out, do you lose the kid?

hey. court reporter here (and yes, femanon(. i've seen people get away with worse. you just need to be really careful and smart. where's ur divorce lawyer? have u considered advising with him? the important stuff is to leave absolutely no trace to ur relationship with her, and dont ever do it close to a window. ur wife sounds like a bitch, she probably has some1 following your every move. make the only evidence the nanny's testimony, and her is easily discredited by implying she got payed by the wife.

Tits or gtfo

goddamn i love Cred Forums

Well, OP, it's simple. If you actually care about your daughter and want to raise her properly you'll turn your dick off and get this nanny back to a strictly business relationship. If however you'd rather fuck around and eventually lose custody when it comes to light that you're nailing the nanny go ahead and choose that option. It WILL come out. Maybe not this year, maybe not in five years, but since your daughter is three years old there's an excellent chance of it coming out before she hits 18 and custody is no longer an issue.

maybe the judge knows you frequent Cred Forums

>The more repressive the government, the less inhibitions their women have

Damn it, I knew I should have taken that english teaching job in saudi.

OP loses his daughter and every thing that matters to him because he want's to fuck a horny 23 y/o, which are a dime-a-dozen.

Post pics of nanny

Hire a fat nanny and a high end escort a few times a week to balance your needs. user is right. This nanny will fuck your shit up royally. She has your balls like your wife does and your refusing to believe reality. Your acting like a 20 year old

Well.. from what Ive, read your ex-wife sounds like a cunt for not allowing you custody while she knows she'll be away on work.
Also you're story sound like like a romance/erotic-novel kind of type deal, just say'in.
So the best thing for you to do right now is ask yourself this question are you falling in love with this woman? Because she is definitely attracted to you. You could deepen the relationship by explaining to her the situation. If there hasn't been trouble in court I doubt she's a spy. I'm sure if she's nice enough to love kids enough to make them part of her daily life she can't be such a bad person. I think you should secretly date her until this whole thing blows over. Don't tell your sister and keep it secret from everyone. Get to know her better. Try and keep it inside your house.
Do you spend time with your kid with her around? It'll be imperative to raise the child with a mother and a father figure. It'll also allow you to bond with her and your daughter at the same time. I think you should have fun with the situation. Seeing as I was in a similar situation with my parents when I was younger this all comes from a sort of experience I guess.. you don't have to trust me but it would be nice to take this happily-ever-after advice into consideration.

Faggot

From reading the first part of the post, it sounds as though his divorce lawyer is incompetent.