Ask a surgical resident anything

Sorry I don't do spines. Can't help.

Not at all.

Is there an operation to make you less of a faggot?

Can someone who went from a C-D student to a straight A student still get into a good school for a BA?

None that I'm aware of.

Come on you gotta have some insight

Do you cut pieces of children's genitals off?

I'm not sure what you mean by BA. Are you talking about getting a bachelor's degree?

No.

Yes. I'm currently working towards my Associates in Biology now.

Can you put a catheter in someone's jugular

Still possible. Admissions boards appreciate improvement and persistence.

About around how many operations have you been apart of?

Yes. Central lines are pretty routine.

814. We have to log every case so easy to check the exact number.

How would you feel if a patient's death was your fault

It feels bad and it doesn't go away.

So it's happened before?

Have you ever found a patient attractive

Wouldn't you rather work in fast food tho

Yes. Medicine's a team sport so it's usually not completely one person's fault... still feels that way though.

Do you know or are you Rose, aka randytaylor69?

pic related

Yes.

No.

Would you eat something you had to take out of someone's body if it meant you never had to work again, everything would always be paid for and you'd be set for life

Do not know who that is.

Have you ever touched another man's penis? Did you enjoy it?

What's the craziest thing that's ever happened while you were operating

That's a new one.
Liver, Lung, Heart: yes.
Spleen: maybe.
small bowel: probably not
appendix, colon, rectum: definitely not

Touched: yes.
Enjoyed: no.

OP might be able to answer this. Recovery time on a posterior superior labrum tear after surgery? Have to see a surgeon on Thursday

How have the attending physicians been treating you?

what's the best specialisation?

I had accidentally cut open an emo girl's cut. She bled everywhere. There was nothing I could do. She was hot though so I fucked her corpse before breaking the news to her family.

OP you sick fuck

Power went out. Had to operate for 15 minutes with two nurses holding flashlights to illuminate the field.

I don't do ortho. Sorry.

Actually pretty well. The culture is (slowly) changing.

Depends of what you're interested in. Salary? Time away from the hospital? Reputation in the medical community?

This can't be OP.

It isn't. A surgeon would never say "cut open a girl's cut."

OP, fellow vascular surgeon here. Don't you hate it when you're operating on someone's fucking jugular and it explodes so you have to get the gauze and stuff it through their neck to the inside of their mouth just to stop the bleeding? Happened to me this week. Finally decided to just stitch the area shut.

Why would you be operating on someone's jugular? Also the carotid sheath doesn't communicate with the oropharynx. I find your post suspicious.

What happens if you gotta take a piss in the middle of a surgery

each please

Wow, great to hear that! That also must mean you're pretty good. :) Although not a question, congrats user. Surgical oncology is my goal, so we'll see how things go.

This happens less frequently than you would think. When it does happen you get to a non-critical part of the case and leave to take a piss. Either an attending surgeon or resident has to stay scrubbed with the patient but the other can leave to piss/eat/whatever.

I'm a finger muscle and hair follicle surgeon. I'm in the field so I know how it is, OP. Crazy shit happens while operating. Just today I had to operate on someone's Hypoligamus Stiffyolitis. Accidentally punctured it, blood everywhere. Finally after a while I got it under control when the trisectomine had ruptured. Fucking crazy shit.

Cosmetic plastic surgery has the best salary and hours but no one in the medical community respects you.

Ever wanna refuse medical assistance to blacks and spics?

I do quite frequently. I will only perform on people of Caucasian descent.

Very good.

No but I frequently want to refuse treatment to entitled wealthy pricks.

Why surgery? You could've settled much faster and money would probably be going through the roof at this point in your life. I'm assuming it's been a good 12+ years and you won't be getting your hands on a decent amount of cash any time soon until you are done with your residency.

Do you love your job?

I love operating. There's a lot about the rest of the job I don't love.

Have you ever purposely killed a patient

I tried to convince myself to like other (easier) fields as much as surgery but nothing comes close. It's exciting and nothing beats the instant gratification of a successful operation. I make enough money right now to live comfortably

Since your job is a very serious one, are you, because of that a very serious person or are you laid back and chill and like eating pizza while jamming out to some Metallica

What's your level of psychopathy?

No. Unless you count withdrawing care.

How does it feel knowing someone's life is in your hands? Is it empowering?

OP confirmed for being Scottish and/or a haggis-lover.

I'm serious when I need to be at work but I'm usually pretty relaxed.

mild to moderate

Yes. And occasionally terrifying.

How many hours do you sleep?

What would happen if you put a liquified pizza roll in someone's blood stream

When I'm on call (we take in-house call every 4-5 days) maybe 1-2 hours. When I'm not on call maybe 6-7 hours.

Their blot would clot and embolize to their lungs and they would die.

Did you have a job while in college? If so, what?

And what's the longest surgery you've been in?

Good that you have that level of self-awareness; many surgeons (and to a lesser extent, other doctors) don't seem to.

Have a favorite kind of suture or other kind of repair?