Gonna an hero via sword

but do it properly

You will die with your honor intact but it will probably hurt like a bitch. If I were in your shoes I'd sell that sword, buy a gun, and shoot myself in the head. That should be the least painful way I think.

No, the sword will immaterialize as soon as you try to stab yourself... fucking japanese lied about seppuko all ghe time :(

Aim for the abdominal aorta

What's the difference?

That's not the point dumbass. Seppuko is not supposed to be an easy way out.

>will probably hurt like a bitch

That's an understatement.

It will hurt more than anything you ever imagined.

The picture shows it idiot.

>It will hurt more than anything you ever imagined
Not really. It'll hurt like getting stabbed. You can have much worse pain.

No but why is one better than the other

It is gonna hurt

way faster, but dont do it, go to a psychiatric emergency room, its gonna be fine

score som heroin first, so that you can actually finish sodokuing. good luck hambre.

Fuck seppuku. Are you some kind of Jap?

Strip naked, stand the sword up, and balance your ass over the tip of the sword. When you're ready, sit down.

>You can have much worse pain.

For sure, but I'm saying that You personally have never felt anything as bad as having a semi-sharp blade slice a large gash right through your stomach into your internal organs. It will feel like pure fire eating you inside.

It'll help if you have a buddy deliver a well timed blow and sever your head

You use your tanto for that, not your katana dingus.

Theoretically you could potentially decapitate yourself with a sharp enough edge and a little resolve.
Give it a go.

If you run at a cop with it, this kills the man everytime

OK edgelord, you need a nominated second, and a shorter blade. Seppuku, bitch

seppuku, most honorable method, but correct me if I'm wrong, but you wouldn't do it with that sword, but a way shorter almost dagger, think it was called tanto

How do I numb the area first so I don't hurt so much

You don't have the discipline to properly commit sepuku. You wouldn't be asking about killing yourself if you were.

You could just stab yourself but the chances of hitting something that won't kill you fast enough are decently high. Also once you're in a whole new world of pain from skewering yourself you'll realize that you want to live and call 911 in a hurry. That or you pass out from the pain and a family member or friend or random samaritan will call 911 for you. I've seen dudes live through some heinous thorasic wounds thanks to modern medicine. Guys so full of holes from stabbings they come in weeping from the pain but mostly because there'll be blood EVERYWHERE and they think it's actually enough to constitute bleeding out. Most of them go home in a few days/weeks.

If you actually want to die then nobody can stop you. You should realize though that you'll be dead soon enough with or without personal intervention. Why not fuck around and see how weird life can get?

If it goes wrong and you end up bleeding out slowly in agony try not to think about how much you regret using the most inefficient method

That look in his eyes is the look of "I regret everything. Fuck me now I'm dying."

do it with the antlers you fucking weeb

>Why not fuck around and see how weird life can get?

This is what keeps me going personally.

If you are planning to An Hero on your own, you can't commit proper seppuku. As far as what says, it holds only a small amount of truth, for with first seppuku you have to disembowel yourself with your tanto, but in later years in the proper ritual a man will be standing behind you so that as soon as you made the first stab, they would decapitate you, ending your life quickly.

There is nothing stranger than the emergent behavior of living things and their floundering conciousnesses. To be alive is a strange and marvelous gift.

>Is sat on Cred Forums
Righto pal

What?

I love to be alive, and strange. >.< All I want is a sausage, egg, and cheese bagel. This keeps me living.

Go out in public with that sword wearing a fedora. The embarrassment would kill most people.

prop the sword up on the ground and attempt to frog splash on to the blade. hope it impales something important.

inb4 you jump and hit your head on your ceiling fan and cry for your mom to give you kissies and nuggies.

Dont do it bro. Take some muy thai classes. Itll make you feel better.

ffs OP, instead of killing yourself, kill others first. and Go Pro it for media/our enjoyment.

How do I numb the spot on my stomach?

opioids. your gonna kill yourself anyway, cant be afraid of doing illegal stuff. buy some skag, shoot it, and once your good and numb, GO FOR IT!!!

Dont be dumb. If youre gonna commit seppuku, get a tonto or wakizashi like this blade on top. Theres no way in hell your committing suicide with a full katana unless youre insanely committed to some ridiculous shit ive seen posted above, or some real ass blood letting.

Seppuku means dying in honor. Self loathing depression has nothing to do with honor.

Either get a better sword for proper execution for OUR entertainment, or find a real reason.

Tits or gtfo fgt
Lulz

BOTH

and the pencil too

pincushion anhero best anhero

lol that's a terrible idea, it'll just go some random direction after carving a new tract through his rectum

cut the jugular vein

although a knife would be a better tool

have someone do it for you, OP, unless you can rig up some sort of gillotine with the sword. Bleeding to death from a throat or head wound is a most unpleasant experience

lol if it's numb enough that it doesn't hurt to kill yourself with a sword, you aren't going to be mentally coherent enough to do it.

to be honest if you're concerned about the pain of suicide, you probably would be better off not killing yourself. real life can be very painful, but if it wasn't obviously less painful than killing yourself with a sword, you would have killed yourself with a sword before you created this thread.

>Bleeding to death from a throat or head
wouldn't those be the most pleasant ways to bleed to death

You can't even kill urself properly. SHAMEFUL DISPLAY. YOU ARE A DISGRACE. youtube.com/watch?v=N6RB62gHO6U

If you don't slash open you belly, you are a fucking fag. And yes, you will die. Just wait.
>protip: OPs already a fag

top kek

Meh. It would be better with a tattoo, but it'll do the trick. Just make sure you go out in the woods or something, you will likely scream like a little bitch and you don't want someone to come save you. That'd be worse than the actual painful death. Have fun with it though user, ya it will be painful, but don't you want to feel something before you die? You will be able to go out feeling an experience as old as man can remember, being slashed open with your guts hanging out. Truly an honor

Tanto not tattoo, sorry doing this via phone

>amateur

I don't think you have a lot of time to practice something like this...

Go to the emergency room and tell them you want to kill yourself. What you're feeling now isn't a permanent affliction.

what will they do

Tell you that you are a faggot. Which should be obvious at this point. But they will also lock you in a room where someone watches you for at least 48 hours straight

they can't treat you without your consent

True Story, I guess I was only thinking of after attempting suicide. Not just admitting suicidal thoughts.

They'll have you sign something that allows them to treat you. After that you'll probably end up in Psychiatric Hospital.

lean on the tip until it goes through

i'm a faggot

Probably give you some seditives to ease your mind, take some blood for tests to see if you are on any drugs and what hormones in your brain are imbalanced (this is that usual case) and have to transferred to a sanitarium where you will meet a psy dr and he or she will be able to do an evaluation on your situation and perscribe you whatever you need to help you get better. It's like a mini vacation from your usual life and not as bad as people say it is. It pulled me out of the dark place i was in. Good luck user

Update: numbed stomach with ice pack, but sword would not go in. Tried again with knife, but it wouldn't go in either. Both just pushed my fat into my gut (I'm over 300lbs)

is your sword even sharp? can you scratch your arm or leg withouth applying force?

>prop sword up on sturdy enough surface to take an impact
>belly flop the sword
>????
>Death

Its a $30 reverse blade (not sharp at all, not as pointy as I thought)

nigger buy a straight razor

Installer: Ah needs tuh put the wahrs
Me: Everything's done. GTFO
Installer: But the wahrs need tuh be all over. I makes muhney from the wahrs
Me: No, it's already been done correctly. You aren't getting your grimy hands on this house.
Installer: But ah needs tuh put the wahrs to the picher box and the teevee.
Me: *slap* Bad wire monkey. Get back in your truck and go bother somebody else.
Installer: But mah paypers. Yew needs tuh scratch on mah paypers weeyuth wunna theyem sticks what makes mahrks
Me: This paperwork says that a lot of things happened that didn't actually happen. I'll sign nothing until you bring me something that isn't full of lies.
Installer: ahmma tell momma on yew
Me: You do that.
Installer: Yew aint nahs *sob*
Me: On this we agree.

The service worked perfectly, BTW.

You're probably going to survive for some time. Be sure to have a bottle of whisky nearby so you have something to do while you slowly bleed to death.

Oh Hell yes

You need 2 swords and another person, perhaps a close friend.

Your friend stands behind you with the sword drawn and ready

Kneel on the ground and reflect on your shameful dishonor

Push the sword into the left side of your abdomen and then quickly drag it to the right side

At this point, your friend will swing downwards, cleanly and quickly removing your head.

With your honor restored you may then be buried with your ancestors.

And this has to do with OP killing himself how?

Yeah unless he hits an artery, it's just going to take a LONG time... not so much suicide as self-torture.

Ok nigger, medfag here.

In case this is not bait:

We had a guy in the clinic fucking 2 times who tried seppuku. He tekt a lot of intestine and stuff but didn't die. 2 fucking times.

If you wanna kill yourself with a sword, the only working way is propably to cut your own throat. And even than it could be hard, only way to safely die is to cut ones carotid artery. And even thrn you have to cut it in a way you can't properly reduce the bleeding by hand.

Get a gun and everything is easier.

what is there to do aside from video games and porn?
I am bored

this was meant to be a new thread, but we can do it here, this thread sucks anyway

This

Haha

Yes this will work gr8

Post results plz

Judging by the fat to muscle ratio on that hand, i'd say op doesn't fap enough.

>here op have bitches

OP stop being a fucking pussy and at least take people down with you if you're intent on ending your faggot life

Saved for future newfags

>is a newfag

Any method is viable if you try hard and believe in yourself.

But seeing as how youre gonna an hero it's clear that the "try hard and believe in yourself" method is lost on you.

That, pepsi, and trolling is what keeps me living.

>belly cross
>it takes guts

kekd

Fucks sake mate call a mate or an anti suicide line.

Suicide by katana beta as fuck btw.

It'd need to be a sharp, clear cut tattoo.

some food for thought OP

>300 lbs
>go into artic tundra
Surely a Luke Skywalker type will eventually show up and slice you open to use your fat ass as a shelter. Go save a life with your suicide user

They will have you sit in line while 28 nigger bitches get free healthcare for their autistic, handicapped shit kids.

That's how I plan to go. Can always count on Luke.

Yeah make sure you tip your fedora before you go

Pics and timestamp faggot

A reverse blade eh? Bro start working out then go all Ruroni Kenshin on these illegals we got.

This, please do not try it. If you are determined to die, please consider the exitbag.

U can always throw a can of soda at a hobo at the intersection before zooming away.

Now you are just plain trolling as that Katana on your pic is a cheap piece of sheet metal, probably not even sharpened - but by no means a weapon.

Start a religion with me

Are you Joseph Smith lol?
> dumb dumb dumb dumb

The fact that you even own a sword means that this should have been done a long time ago.

It's gonna hurt like a bitch but you will die eventually

Anti- suicide is a church based notion. You camt get raped, beaten, or murdered if you kill yourself- first. Look it up you single- existance niggers. Takes pride and nobility to endones life by their own hand.

Basically! The way I see it, people decide what's meaningful, but if you share conceptions of what's meaningful with other people, that can make it easier to connect with them. I see that as a positive of religions... with the downside being that they're obvious bullshit.

So the idea is to come up with a mythos & system of ideas that are helpful to people and that at least some other people are willing to agree are meaningful. And at the same time, to not go around saying that this is the true, objective reality of the universe, because that seems to be the biggest stumbling block shared by other religions.