You find me in a dark alley like this... Nobody is around

You find me in a dark alley like this... Nobody is around.

Waht do?

it's not you

Take a picture and send it to Cred Forums and ask Cred Forums what do.

Cut yer dick off

Place a bowl of eggs next to you and hope you like them

if you are a chick I'd probably stay far away from you. You will most likely accuse the closest person to you of rape when you wake up.

If you are a dude I'd help you get up and see if we can call one of your friends or family member to pick you up.

Good user

If you were a Guy, id prolly help you out. take you to eat, and talk bullshit, if you were a girl. id be scared to be called a rapeist. so id prolly leave you alone tbh.

this is gay on so many ways

Kick her right in the pussy

Shit. I had that Motorola flip phone. I was going to buy the RAZR but the salesguy told me that blue Motorola was the same as the RAZR just bigger. He was right. Thanks, OP.

gay until you go to prison and become some prison tank's fuck toy.

Because I am a Dad, I would help the girl out of the dark alley first...then maybe try to help her get home safe. If a tit fell out along the way, I'd make sure to get a good look at it. Maybe even take a photo, jerk off to it later. Hey, I'm still human.

Piss like right next but not directly on her so the puddle drifts towards her but I have deniability if anyone shows up, then carry on, on my way home.

Will do this, op.

Take a good whiff of your crotch. If yo shit stinky, you probably weren't planning on getting fucked as opposed to getting fucked up tonight, so you probably had too many for the sake of fun. I'd call you a cab. If you smell clean, you planned on getting fucked and it's likely not happened yet. You're either a respectable prostitute or a disgusting whore, best way to tell would be to ask you how much for the rest of the night. If you welcome my advance, I apologize and state I don't eat off the floor. If you offend, I apologize and insist my question was fair given the circumstance. Either case I'd call you a cab. Go the fuck home, you're drunk.

20 minutes of action

Feed you eggs

Check for witnesses of European descent.

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Will fill you with my juice

I'd play with the titties for a lil and then wake her up and help her make her want to thank me and then fuck her, bam

call the police and have her arrested for public intoxication and stupidity. but not before writing 'whore' on her forehead in sharpie.

Silly OP that's not where you sleep

Put it back, it doesn't belong to you

Call the coast guard and tell them there is still poachers nearby since I found another dead whale

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Why cannot i just wake her up and continue the fun together?

Leave her to be raped by muslims/niggers

Cut your shorts and panties off, apply some lube and fuck you. then leave. THE PERFECT RELATIONSHIP.

This is why you carry her home and locker her in your basement. If she can't tell anyone it's all okay. Some guys managed to hold girls in their basements for decades before they fucked up.

Some Chinese guy build an entire prison under his apartment complex where he kept multiple women for fun.

If it's a guy I'd likely call an ambulance especially if it's cold. No reason not to help a fellow human being.

Are there more of that set?

Put it in your butt. :)

Will bring her to the daddy

I wouldn't hesitate to cut off your penis if I found you that way. Just helping out other human beings and society in general.

calling the police or an ambulance would make you seem rapey?

I would tear those shorts off and ram my dick into her soft cunt and pound her until i fill her up with my sperm.
I would then wait until my balls have rested enough and then start fucking her again. I would unload my balls of hot semen into her cunt.
Repeat that until she starts to wake up and then tell her that the guy who raped her just ran away in that direction.

Take you to the nearest police station
On way find a nigger write down character and clothes.
Say I found you and this guy were running away.
Get thank you from you and your family and hopefully get a nigger shot
>I'll be a hero in everyone's eyes
Probably sniff your asshole and pussy fist and steal underwear
>profit

run as fast as i can to the nearest open market and buy eggs

Harvest your kidneys and sell them on the black market.

Will bring you to my cozy home

Look at the Cell near her. I must be back in time.

Try to wake her and get information.

kidnap you and forcefeed you a bowl of eggs

wtf max file size is 2MB? i thought it was 3

Steel your wallet, fondle your titties, finger you and leave you there. Filthy cunt.

Since you're a woman I'd ignore you. I don't wanna be accused of rape. If you were a dude. I'd help you up try to get you some help or something.

carry you home,
bathe you caringly,
put you in some clean pjays,
wash your clothes and lay them out.

>call ambulance
>hold her hand while we wait
>sit through hospital bullshit with her
>go home meet her family
>get married
>have sex in the missionary position for the sake of procreation

your going to rot in hell faggot

>your

This is the standardized approach

And a grammar nazi. U iz a spesial kint of evil.

Walk away as if I never saw her.

Simply put... in this day in age? Being a "Good Samaritan" gets you fucked in the ass. She could claim rape and your life is over. It ain't worth it. Now, if I saw a GUY? I'd call 911 and tell them I found someone passed out and i'd tell them where to get him. I've done that before in the past. But NEVER would I do that for a woman. No fucking way.

Fuck yeah there is ! old fag reporting in with full set and thread

you would call 911, and tell them were a dude is,

but you wouldnt call 911 and tell them where a chick is ??

if shes fucking passed out and u just drop a call how the fuck is she going to say you rapped her???
Youll just be some sort of fucking anonymoose faggot

protip: periodically inject tiny amounts of ethanol directly in vein. So that she remains unconscious, do whatever you want and deposit it back when done

leave her to die, she is ugly and as fuck and must be really stupid.

She can say that she was "groped" and the police would believe her no questions asked no evidence needed. You were there as you called and admitted it. Thus you are guilty, enjoy your sex offender status.

Serious answer,
I want to help you but I'm afraid if I touch you or even stand near you I will get accused of rape so I probably just leave you.

I'd make sure she's OK.

steal her phone, kick her 2/10 tits

Get back on the time machine because that phone is from 2004

I want some sauce for the chinese guy. where can I read the full story?

Not worth the risk. They might wonder. Just not worth it. Women fuck over men every goddamn day. I'm no sucker. Not happening to me. Fuck that.

activate rape mode

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Nurse back to health and re-hydrate on a diet of liquid protein.

Squirt 'er with some Liquid Ass...

>rapped her???
yo yo
all bitches be witches
dont rape wid no cape
captor raptor
I aint rapper

peace out

>slice throat
>cut off nipples and take them for later
>fuck the shit outta you
>cut off ur outer lips and chew on them on the way home

Gits redduh fuh sum muh dikkin' !

Sleeping girls are so peaceful

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and the award for edgiest post goes to...

It's certainly more likely to incriminate you, yes.

You lose nothing by just leaving her.

And don't complain to us please, this is the world feminists made for you.

Classy and elegant. Surely this is the first time she's ever accidentally had too much.

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call cops say there's a girl passed out in an alleyway, say where it is, and stay there to make sure you're safe.

Turn 360° and walk away

More?

sup nigger. I used to have that mobile telephone. shit was cash.

^this guy get's it

>get's

Check her airway, put her in the recovery position, call for an ambulance and draw a dick on her forehead with a sharpie.

But if you turned 360 you'd walk towards her

Any more user?

Wonder how I traveled back to 2004 with your shitty flipphone

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Feminism says yes.

no idiot. turning 360 means he turns all the way around and walks away.

fucking mongoloid....

Moonwalk faggot

Not of that girl no

she already starts to smell

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you must be new here

first i would check if youre still able to talk then i would carry you in my car take of my jacket and put it around you then i would drive you to my house and make you a tea if youre feeling good again i would ask you why you were laying there 20 minutes later i would cum in your vagina like no tomorrow

>Being this easy to Bait

The popular answer here is
>durr hurr, rape

But honestly, I would dial 911, tell them what I see, and wait for them to get there while I attempt to wake her and get her off the fucking pavement.

Not everyone has a rape fantasy.

>inb4 whiteknight

aaaaaaand another

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anal penetration until I'm satisfied and I cum all over the place. then I will anally penetrate you until I cum inside you. then I will crush your skull with my boot. then I will order a dominos pizza so I can kill the pleb delivery guy. then I will order a papa johns pizza because I'll be hungry at this point. I won't tip the papa johns delivery guy.

context buddy, you are out of it.

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faggot.

Have fun with your rape accusation Cred Forumsro :)

Ha, that bitch is going to be so embarrassed when she wakes up

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looks real :D
hope to kill some prostitutes myself one day, they deserve it

I'm INSTERTING my HAND into YOUR pocket to find your phone.
I'm calling your mom.

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I'd feel tempted to pull down her shirt but wouldn't do it..

What if she's vegan like most of the stupid degenerates floating around nowadays?

Ok Ted Jr...

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is she dead?

Take the phone and call a family memeber. Tell them i found you drunk and passed out. Tell them the location to pic you up. That or take you to the police. And tell them wats up

It's at these sorts of times I think to myself, What would Bill Cosby do?

he would probably do the right thing like usual

Whole reason I came to this thread

have fun getting shot in the head by a woman cop who doesn't understand that you didn't kidnap the girl.

Yea il shure the will suspect me of kidnapping if i walk her through the front door of the police station

Just because you "walk through the front door" of the police station doesn't mean you didn't kidnap her, feel remorse/panic, then take her to the police station saying "oh uh yea uh I uh totally uh found her like passed out and stuff heh uh yea"