Dubs decides what terrible pickup line I text my girlfriend

I'm gay.

Damn baby I wan to connect with you in another level. I want to connect my lips with your anus.

roll

Man it sucks that my sister is grounded tonight. Do you think you could come over and be my sister?

To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis Nobler in the mind to suffer
The Slings and Arrows of outrageous Fortune,
Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them: to die, to sleep
No more; and by a sleep, to say we end
The Heart-ache, and the thousand Natural shocks
That Flesh is heir to? 'Tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To die, to sleep,
To sleep, perchance to Dream; aye, there's the rub,
For in that sleep of death, what dreams may come,
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause. There's the respect
That makes Calamity of so long life:
For who would bear the Whips and Scorns of time,
The Oppressor's wrong, the proud man's Contumely, [F: poor]
The pangs of despised Love, the Law’s delay, [F: disprized]
The insolence of Office, and the Spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his Quietus make
With a bare Bodkin? Who would Fardels bear, [F: these Fardels]
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscovered Country, from whose bourn
No Traveller returns, Puzzles the will,
And makes us rather bear those ills we have,
Than fly to others that we know not of.
Thus Conscience does make Cowards of us all,
And thus the Native hue of Resolution
Is sicklied o'er, with the pale cast of Thought,
And enterprises of great pitch and moment, [F: pith]
With this regard their Currents turn awry, [F: away]
And lose the name of Action. Soft you now,
The fair Ophelia? Nymph, in thy Orisons
Be all my sins remembered.

Last week, I talked with your ex bf via *enter social media network he uses here* and he told me you like anal.
Well, I'm cool with getting my cock inside your poop deck and you licking it clean. Let's have a try, tomorrow. Love you :*

what's the difference between a lima bean and a chickpea?
...
I've never had a lima bean all over my face

annnd check em

roll

I wanted to ask you something really private.
We each other for some time and I think the relationship is doing well. Now, what I want to ask you might confuse you, but hear me out:
Are you into a threesome with me and your sister/brother/best friend?

rolling for this again.

lame

Babe, I'm lying on my bed all naked with a tail plug inside my ass.
I've got a second one for you. Ready for some kinky furry sex? ;)

if your sister is grounded wouldnt she be at home? retard

Rolling for this hard

>only realizes now there are already dubs
>mfw

user, what did she respond?

are you a parking ticket? because you've got FINE written all over you

nice dubs.

pls respond

>Clearly not understanding the joke
Or
>Clearly hasn't lurked incest threads on Cred Forums

I want to put my underwear inside you

OP here, she hasn't responded