/heem/: RIZIN edition

upcoming events:

9/24: UFC FN 95 - Cyborg vs Lansberg
9/25: RIZIN 2 - Gracie vs Tokoro
10/1: UFC FN 96 - Lineker vs Dodson
10/8: UFC 204 - Bisping vs Henderson 2
10/15: UFC FN 97 - Lamas vs Penn
10/21: Bellator 162 - Shlemenko vs Grove
11/05: UFC FN 98 - Dos Anjos vs Ferguson
11/11: One FC: Defending Honor - Aoki vs Folayang
11/12: UFC 205 - TBA
11/19: Bellator 163 - Chandler vs Henderson
11/19: UFC FN 99 - Nelson vs Kim
11/19: UFC FN 100 - Gustaffson vs Nogueira
11/26: UFC FN 101 - Rockhold vs Souza 2
12/10: Glory: Collision - Verhoeven vs Hari

News:

>TUF 24 fighter Brandon Moreno steps in against Smolka
mmajunkie.com/2016/09/tuf-24-contestant-brandon-moreno-in-for-pettis-meets-louis-smolka-at-ufc-fight-night-96

>Tate back
mmaweekly.com/miesha-tate-tries-to-rebound-against-raquel-pennington-at-ufc-205

>Belal Muhammad vs Lyman Good added to UFC 205
mmajunkie.com/2016/09/lyman-good-vs-belal-muhammad-joins-ufc-205-at-madison-square-garden

friendly reminder that PRIDE rules + elbows is the perfect ruleset for MMA.

your ideal ruleset?
strawpoll.me/11289956

Other urls found in this thread:

twitter.com/PaigeVanzantUFC/status/779554135133741056
fb.com/video.php?v=10154327910125709
mmafighting.com/2016/9/13/12905112/jordan-mein-coming-out-of-retirement-hoping-for-ufc-fight-in-the-fall
youtube.com/watch?v=lWCsSTQFIA8
m.youtube.com/watch?v=whf5jW5JYT0
youtu.be/3V0kfprVrrw
youtube.com/watch?v=UpGvMyaLQtA
youtu.be/OOtRwlZvz_E
youtube.com/watch?v=-bWbad4hBo4
streamable.com/9l6i
edmontonjournal.com/news/crime/man-accused-of-murder-for-allegedly-crashing-truck-into-mma-fighter-granted-bail
instagram.com/p/BKudnnBh9ql/
youtu.be/vHGPbl-werw
youtube.com/watch?v=CTDljAo9wD0
youtube.com/watch?time_continue=3&v=kDSPeza7Wyc
youtube.com/watch?v=bTWuJeHUZFw
mmafighting.com/2016/9/24/13026542/dominick-cruz-ufc-fs1-bantamweight-champion-broadcast-booth
youtube.com/watch?v=Wcj64LDGrhc
youtube.com/watch?v=u90JrlHVwjk
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

WHAT DO YOU SEE

weigh ins start for rizin on the hour

Invicta so comfy

I could heem everyone here and twice on sunday

You took it too far you punk ass yank
See you in 13 hours, once I land I will heem every there

this is a mildly autistic, there's my perfect MMA ruleset.

PRIDE rules + elbows
unlike pride, no piledrive, banning striking to the spine or the back of the head but allowing piledriving is just retarded.

yellow cards and referees have cameras.

unlike pride the fights take place in cage.

1st 10 minute round and 2nd 5 minute for normal fights.

championship fights and main events are 3 rounds of 10 minute.

judges will value all the fight.

IMPORTANT

twitter.com/PaigeVanzantUFC/status/779554135133741056

square cage with larger padded turnbuckles (like a bevel) and its perfect. need those angles brah

oh and extra round in case of draws like in K1

what about clavicle, small joint manipulation

If the cage is square why bother making it a cage? Why not just have a ring?

Heeminder to trane in the gi at least 3 times a week minimum

Ring Ropes are more troublesome than Fencing

ring causes action to stop all the time. get tangled in them, fall out, get too close to the edge while grappling etc. and have to be restarted in the middle. it happened pretty often in pride.

so basically you want the square shape for those nice sharp angles that promote exciting striking exchanges with a fence so the action isn't interrupted.

>first for t nig is the welterweight champ we deserve

Did Fedor bitch out of the Cro Cop rematch?

...

Is she eating the seeds? Wtf

delet this post right now you goof

Lets analyze Fedor's opponents and see if he was really a can crusher
>Ricardo Aroma (Never lost even a point in grappling)
>Renato Sobral (Strikeforce Light Heavyweight Champion)
>Lee Hasdell (Three time British May Thai and Kickboxing Champion)
>Semmy Schilt (Four time K1 Grand Prix Winner)
>Antonio Nogueira x2 (Pride Heavyweight Champion, UFC Interim Heavyweight Champion)
>Mark Coleman x2 (UFC Tournament 10 &11 Winner, UFC Heavyweight Champion, Pride 2000 Grand Prix Winner)
>Kevin Randleman (UFC Heavyweight Champion)
>Naoyo Ogawa (Seven World Judo Medals, Olympic Silver Medalist)
>Mirko Cro Cop (Pride 2006 Grand Prix Winner, K1 2012 Grand Prix Winner)
>Mark Hunt (K1 2001 Grand Prix Winner)
>Tim Sylvia (Two Time UFC Heavyweight Champion)
>Andrei Arlovski (UFC Heavyweight Champion)
>Singh Daideep (K1 2009 Grand Prix Winner)
>Satoshi Ishii (Olympic 2008 Judo Gold Medal)

Who eats watermelon with a fork?
Who eats watermelon with the seeds in it?
Who eats watermelon in a fucking car?

Paige is such a weirdo, and not in the endearing way

He ducked Brock therefore he is shit.

...

Dana gave him a bad deal. Brock would have got squashed

>Brock would have got squashed

brock would have got squished.

Fedor got heemed by an old man that is now fighting at middleweight you fucking goof.

none of those things are weird you faggot. what the fuck does a snownigger living in the arctic circle know about fruit.

i love cody

Brock is a meme

Your whole country is a meme.

UFC uploaded the first Bisping/Hendo fight, meaning we get to see the KO in much better quality now.

Fedor only had 14 fights?

fedor is an old man who would have fought at middleweight if he didn't love his wives' olivier salad so much.

...

thanks man

Weidmans meme kicks are looking sharp

fb.com/video.php?v=10154327910125709

>yfw 205 is going to be the next 200

Lmao Fury vs Clitschko cancelled again.

t. pulev

sup /heem/! this is your hourly reminder that tyron tha god has HEEMED muh orc in the first round.

tyron bless

I mean yeah it sucks that we wont get gooby, but it does actually look like a damn good card

A super stacked card wiht a joke main event? Yes please.

>sportsbooks moved Alvarez vs mcgregor from a future prop to a fight @ 205
What did they mean by this?

>you now remember ufc 200 was unironically headlines by tate vs nunes

...

...

doesn't really mean anything. if they figure enough people want to bet on it being at 205 they will put up a line

the way it was before it would have some terms like "no action if fight doesn't take place by 12/31/16"

this way they can tie it to an actual card even if it's pure speculation

...

clavicle allowed, small joint not.

gonna make a 1080p webm?

i think there was a dude in the nfl last week who played like half a game on a broken clavicle

i'll do it, will see if there's anything else worth making

Those are his notable wins

So 14 out of his 36 wins are notable?
Thats a lot of cans

That was before he got into PRIDE m8. Guys beginning their career and working their way up fight lots of cans.

bisping was at the height of his heel momentum for this fight

he was conor before conor, but less able to back it up. crazy that he's champ

Hes been my boy since I started watching MMA
>TFW your life long journy man boy wins the belt

Most people will see in this picture one goat and one literally who

What I see in this picture is a dank future timeline where the arrogant gets flying triangled and justice for the 96 prevails

if seeing bisping win the title didnt move you you're no fightfan in my books.

presser was legend

which is funny because i dont think bisping wanted to needle luke that bad but when he walked in (beer in hand) luke was mid-answer and sounded like he was talking shit

I'm not saying I could heem every here but I AM saying every here would drop a 30-27 decision to me on the fight pass prelims

justice for the 96 la

this reminds me i had an e-friend from a video game from liverpool who was super passionate about teh 96. tried to get him into mma but he told me was becoming a tranny. stopped talking to me when i said that's fucked up. we gotta stop the jews mane.

>TFW your life long journy man boy wins the belt
Yeah well my journeyman boy just unretired!

oh shit when is fighting? in the ufc still?

I think its a little soon to be calling paddy the goat

Hope hes not shit

...

mmafighting.com/2016/9/13/12905112/jordan-mein-coming-out-of-retirement-hoping-for-ufc-fight-in-the-fall

was rewatching this on mute for webm creation and man i gotta give hendo credit for his ringcraft

fucking whole world knows the right hand is coming and he still lands it a few times before the mega heem

youtube.com/watch?v=lWCsSTQFIA8

i gotta do one for the set up of the heem cuz he throws the weakest inside leg kick right before this, and then fakes it here which is why he gets such a monster shot in

>ringcraft
t. hack slack wannabe

hendo lands the most ludicrous follow up shots

He kind of uses the kick to step inside Bispings legs, winds up, plants his lead foot and just uncorks. He has used that trick more then a few times throughout his career.

Jeremy Stephens lands some really gnarly Post Heem Punches (PHPs) too

Ring craft is a boxing term, not a jack slack term you dunce

Prefer the more classical term "ringsmanship"? Me too.

i know im just memeing. but actually i'll bet a lot of mma fans were first introduced to it by slack.

i prefer 'ring generalship' you filthy prole.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=whf5jW5JYT0

>i prefer 'ring generalship' you filthy prole.
Absolutely disgusting I will walk you down and turn you out like a Saturday night streetwalker.

i just never thought to give hendo credit for """cutting off the cage"""

i was a pretty big noob watching it live not understanding how bisping could be so dumb to keep circling into the power hand

kek @ yamasaki

If you're not flexible enough to pull rubber guard you should Heem yourself

fuck me i hate when i fuck up that first frame

Bisping looks so much better with the beard

The first guy jumping up and down
True fight fan

here's the real money shot replay

kinda sucks the slow mo is so long hurts the quality

that's dan's corner, hendo wears the same shirt as them when they raise his hand

...

>205 will be headlined by jj vs kk after tyron pops

>kisses the hand before the follow up shot

...

I'd be okay with that
Joanna is one of the more dominant current champs and she deserves a big fight like this

>but actually i'll bet a lot of mma fans were first introduced to it by slack.
Not Necessarily a bad thing tho

Looks great when I give it the Right Click -> Video Speed -> 2x for a smooth 60

Mfw he ends the sea level Cain meme at 207

That's Krzysztof Soszynski

don't get me wrong, im fine with it

I just saw my buddy get heem'd by my best friend at work tonight. Tried breaking it apart and saw a irl gnp k.o. but don't know how to feel about it. Part of me wishes i took a vid to show you guys, but part of me feels like i should never talk about it again. Any thoughts or similar situations?

it's not really a compelling matchup though, they are basically feeding KK to her

would love to see joanna meet up with valentina eventually, maybe at a catch weight. going 0-3 against her in muay thai gotta sting

shit happens

/heem/, how does a punch to the leg feel compared to a leg kick?

this picture has a lot going for it

>rogan with hair

now you must heem your best friend.

heem that goof

...

youtu.be/3V0kfprVrrw

you cannot allow your normie friend to think that he is a heem G-d when he doesn't even post here. heem him NOW.

do we just invade GB after hendo permaheems bisbong?

...

kek

it looks like hendo forgot his dentures

Anyone have the Cerrone combo finish against Story webm?

...

Wow, thats dope. Thanks. Unfotunately it was in a tight space. Couldnt do much.
Nah bro. He feels horrible about it. Scared the fuck out of him when he saw the blood and the guys eyes glazed. Hes humble as fuck.

thank you canada

how the fuck did he get stunned from a jab

is there a version that shows the knee?

Not sure, this is only other one I have.

fanks m8

lads im still bummed out about cerrone lawler being scrapped.

gastelum is trash, hendricks would have been a better fight even if he was USADA'd

...

...

youre bummed because gatelum will beat him? lmao

Bummed because Gastelum a boring, win or lose.

fake fightfan detected

I bet you find GSP boring aswell

It's not that Gastelum is boring, it's that cerrone is one of the most entertaining fighters in the world today

I didn't say I find Gastelum boring did I? I said Gastelum a boring. There's a difference.

no, its because cerrones spicy potential is being ruined by shitstelum

fukin racists its becuz hes a spic

youtube.com/watch?v=UpGvMyaLQtA

Post better meme than yewll do nuttin. You cant.

desu id like some hendricks oc too

Weekends are a social construct. It's 5:11am EST. I hope you are all sober, employed and ready to train. Get after it today heemsters.

he has only been boring as of late, not sure if coaching or his opponents are to blame

maybe he fights to his opponent's pace

>its a Muay Thai fighter gets absolutely BTFO in an MMA fight episode

Don't talk shit about my girl. But yea, I wish she wouldn't do this.

>its a brit thinking his opinion matters after getting a fluke champion episode

Japanese vnz of UFC Tonight where Kawajiri, Takada and a few other dudes break down the RIZIN fights youtu.be/OOtRwlZvz_E

>super stacked card

how the fuck are we supposed to understand this?

get in my guard bro

she should stick to muay thai/kickboxing but i guess there is no money there, as long as her ground game is pretty much non existent this will happen most of they time.

idk learn nipponese or someting

>greece posting about conor
a classic /heem/ post tradition

stipe tapped

>WAKE UP, JOANNA.

>this isnt a stacked card

champions by June 1st 2017

dc
rumble
jacare
cerrone
conor
aldo(conor vacates)
cruz
dj
ronda
jj

cerrone vs conor main events the july show @170

cap this

Be careful that is some powerful meme magic you're playing with

dc guna win heavy weight title is he?

cap it bud

I heard Lion Fight fucked her over.

You could see the "oh fuck'' moments in her face. Distressing to watch.

Schilling said fuck doing MMA for a pretty good reason. You're used to doing shit the same way your entire career and then it changes very dynamically. Its just not gonna happen for her. :'(

If she keeps getting rag-dolled by grapplers , its gonna wreck her ego. I don't wanna see that carry over to her other competitions.

At least she knocked the bitch down once.

in terms of compelling matchups theres maybe two or three there

literally the only non-meme fight on the main card was velasquez browne

Fight Pass: spicy heems
FS1: Boring decisions
PPV: 3 boring decisions with some Brock memes and 2 spicy finishes.

>tfw Fury is never going to fight again
>tfw boxing is all out of memes

>meisha vs nunes was meme
best fight

>pulling out of a fight because you're feeling sad
what a cuck sport lmao

youtube.com/watch?v=-bWbad4hBo4

spicy leg kicks

>Ben Nguyen has been T/KOed 5 times in his MMA career

literally who

>tfw mma is banned in thailand
>tfw we'll never see thais training their kids mma literally for every day of their lives

felt good to see plebbit get heemed tb h

T H I C C
H
I
C
C

streamable.com/9l6i

it was, it isn't anymore

ONEFc had a card in bangkok

it's been a couple of months only though.

now France is bullshit, and Norway is the biggest pussy country in the known world, it's actually illegal to spar any martial art in norway, maybe wrestling and bjj would be ok but no striking

>Norway is the biggest pussy country in the known world, it's actually illegal to spar any martial art in norway
I refuse to believe this

Norway[edit]
In Norway, sports that involve knock-outs as a means of securing victory or points are illegal, including MMA and boxing.[217][218] Norwegian MMA fighters must therefore travel abroad to compete. The Norwegian MMA Federation (NMMAF) was elected as a full member of the International MMA Federation (IMMAF) on 22 April 2012,[219] representing 49 member gyms across Norway.[220] In 2012 the "Merkekamper" concept was introduced by the NMMAF, with government sanctioning, that enables member MMA gyms to hold events with sparring matches, but governed by strict rules concerning how hard a fighter is permitted to strike.[221][222]

but somehow professional boxing got legal in 2014 with these laws there, I never heard about it but it said it was legal on boxing's page

>tfw I can grind any here to a controversial split decision

m8 I'll have you robbed by the judges before you can say steak and kidney pie

What I will do to you will make what Leonard Garcia did to Korean Zombie look like GSP vs Fitch, sware on me mum

and we were laughing at sweden for being cucks

gb2r

I remember a norwegion bro talking in heemspeak and he never mentioned this.

Tequisha is gonna get beat up

Only if you elect trump and promise to annex Ireland as well

Gregor Gillespie (7-0), a 4 time All American and a Division 1 National Champion is making his debut tonight.

That was bullshit what she did with her fist.

Is Josh Barnett a meme?

no

His loss to Rothwell confirmed that he is, yes. A shame.

Rothwell's style is really made for opponents smaller than him,his stance is really heavy on his rear foot makes it harder for opponents to land a clean shot on his head.

>he's not a can if he won in another sport
Holy shit can heem be this fucking stupid? Lots of the people on that list were cans or at least too green in MMA. He has legit wins too, don't get me wrong, but the logic here is retarded. K1 / judo / wrestling experience, even top level, does not make you not a can in MMA.

I'm pretty sure she;s actually so bad at judging distance she didn't expect that to happen.

Do you know what a tomato can is?

>they are basically feeding KK to her
Do people not remember the Valerie fight? KK could easily take it to a decision. It's like JJ has been dusting people. Claudia was like a few elbows in the 3rd away from beating her.

Do you? Was James Toney a legit opponent because being good at any other sport automatically makes you good at MMA somehow?

>I would rape your ass harder then Jonbenet Ramsey

His smile and optimism: gone.

>there are people in this thread who thought Robbie Lawler would beat Conor McGregor

>muh blood orc
>he is so brutal haha
>5th round Robbie is the GOAT
>Lawler has an iron chin
>Conor has no chance

fucking goofs

Being from a karate background and a southpaw would enable me to control you with my jab and aloofness and win a unanimous decision against every here.

...

Lawler is my boy but if he somehow manages to lose to Cowboy, this might actually be a legitimate fight to make. Which is ridiculous.

Should we tell him?

Nobody under six foot can beat McGregor.

Aniruddha Sharma50 minutes ago
No. Smart enough to realize Robin engages in "talking big" a lot; saying relatively simple and obvious stuff in a way that makes stupid people assume genius-level intelligence where there is none. Read Jack Slack, Lawrence Kenshin and BJJ Scout for real in-depth analysis.

...

Joseph Duffy is 5'10". Eat shit abbo.

Lanklets, when will they learn?

Shinya Aoki would strangle the life out of goober.

I meant from now on.

Duffy would also decimate Michael Johnson, by the way.

What kind of meme are you trying to feed me here?

>be LEO
>doing defensive tactics training
>Sergeant to gets in my guard
>Decide not to be a test dummy and attempt to fight back
>he gets my back and simulates my death

Shits crazy senpai. Getting choked out is scary AF

>tfw Dos Buritos pulled out of the fight so Goober couldn't KO him and then go up to KO Lawler as well

what could have been... the memes, the memes would have been timeless

>implying he could take that left

Aoki is good but he has been fighting lowe end competition for the last 4 or so years, he also got heemed by a cross dressing kickboxer

edmontonjournal.com/news/crime/man-accused-of-murder-for-allegedly-crashing-truck-into-mma-fighter-granted-bail

instagram.com/p/BKudnnBh9ql/

>P-pls notice me senpai

*unsheathes katana*

He can't get away with this.

>Me personally would like to see @tjdillashaw fight @cody_nolove the winner fights @dominickcruz it's simple you both want the belt only one can get the shot (as a fight fan holy shit I'll be watching these fights )

I agree desu. TJ vs Cody in a title eliminator match would be good.

Has a footballer ever challenged you a fight /heem/?

Ps I mean NFL

We don't play hand egg here and only middle class kids play rugby.

give caraway a shot
let him and meisha lose on the same card

No chance Dom is fighting at msg. there are already three title fights on the card.

What's better than three title fights?

Show me a bigger meme list than this.

>instagram.com/p/BKudnnBh9ql/

if dom accepts this and wins i would become a #cruzmissile for life

The Keto Kids return at LHW

207 or 206

>conor has more power than rory
(You)

Probably, he could comain under Ronda or DC/Rumble or main event the last fox show of the year. I was just referring to Tate already being booked for 205 so there isn't any way caraway would get a title shot on the same night.

Friendly heeminder that you're beautiful just the way you are

youtu.be/vHGPbl-werw

cruz
dc
dj
tj
joanna qt

Actually UpComing Events

24-Sep Budo 16
24-Sep Battle Events
24-Sep KOTC
24-Sep UFC Fight Night 95
24-Sep MFC 10
24-Sep Road FC 33
24-Sep Shamrock FC
24-Sep Valor Fight 15
24-Sep BCMMA
24-Sep Gladiator Challenge
24-Sep Fight Club Den Haag
24-Sep ACB 46
24-Sep EFN
24-Sep ADW
24-Sep MGL-1 Fighting Championship
24-Sep HDH
25-Sep Tenkaichi Fight
25-Sep Heat
25-Sep Rizin 2
29-Sep IMCF
30-Sep Brace 43
30-Sep RFA 44
30-Sep Unified 28
30-Sep Thunder Fight 9
01-Oct Superior Challenge 13
01-Oct SHC 12
01-Oct KOTC
01-Oct KOTC
01-Oct Euro FC 1
01-Oct KSW 36
01-Oct UFC Fight Night 96
01-Oct Russian MMA Union
01-Oct ACB 47
01-Oct EFN
01-Oct KCFA 20
01-Oct V3 Fights
01-Oct JMMAF
01-Oct Fatality Arena vs. Gringo Super Fight
01-Oct STB
02-Oct Pancrase
02-Oct Russian MMA Union
02-Oct Deep
03-Oct BWF
07-Oct One Championship
07-Oct Kaiser Fight Night 1 / PLMMA
07-Oct WSOF 33
07-Oct LFC 60
08-Oct WMMAA
08-Oct KOTC
08-Oct KOTC
08-Oct Prime Fighting 8
08-Oct UFC 204
08-Oct Juiz de Fora Fight
08-Oct EFN
08-Oct Spartan Fight 5
08-Oct HCC
08-Oct JVT
09-Oct Shooto
09-Oct Deep
10-Oct Grachan / Blue Dog Gym
13-Oct FCOC
14-Oct HKFC
14-Oct LFC
14-Oct Combate Americas
15-Oct Brace 44
15-Oct Hit-FC
15-Oct Road FC 34
15-Oct KOTC
15-Oct KOTC
15-Oct UFC Fight Night 97
15-Oct Gladiator Challenge
15-Oct EFC 54
15-Oct AFC 17
15-Oct Imortal
15-Oct EMMA
15-Oct FEN 14
15-Oct MTC
15-Oct CWFC 79
15-Oct CMA Kaiser / Kingdom Ehrgeiz
16-Oct Shooto
16-Oct JMMAF
16-Oct Pancrase
18-Oct Deep
21-Oct Fight Time Promotions
21-Oct WXC 65
21-Oct Bellator 162
21-Oct M-1 Challenge 71
22-Oct KOTC
22-Oct MFL 43
22-Oct SFL
22-Oct Premier FC 21
22-Oct Gladiator Challenge
22-Oct CFC
22-Oct ACB 48
22-Oct SFL 26
22-Oct CFL
22-Oct KWG
22-Oct JF
23-Oct RFP

Thank you for your service

>qt

Thank you very much

youtube.com/watch?v=CTDljAo9wD0

>OFFICIAL /heem/ ANALYST POWERRANKINGS

1. Eugene S. Robinson
1. Brendan Schaub
2. Bryan Callen
3. Kid/King/Cuck Nate

.
.
.
4. Cuck Thompson
.
.
.
.
5. Zane Simon
6. Hack Slack
.
7. Connor neckbeard
8. Dr. Wyman
9. Dallas Winston
10. Luca Fury
11. Cody Saftic
12. Bas
13. Rogan

-------UFC SHILL POWER GAP------

14. Dominick Cruz
15. Dan Hardy
16. Brian Stann
17. Bisping
18. Florian
19. Cormier
20. Tyrone
21. Robin Black

Any girl is a qt when you're a virgin.

>Even Juliana Pena refused to sign a contract to fight Shevchenko at 205

Bloody hell, the times are changin'

>/heem/s autism power rankings
1. American sperg
-
2. Spain
-
-
3. Adan
-
-
-
-
4. Australian who hates memes
-
5. DYEL netherlands
-
6. Brit who tries to force pastas
-
-
-
7. Rest of /heem/

--------POWERGAP---------

90000001. Me

>UFC gross revenue is $500 million a year
>roster of 500 fighters
>they all think they should be making 7 figures
Lmao it's not surprising that these brain damaged goofs don't understand how a company profits and grows.

some of them are barely making 5 figures though.

Who's your WMMA waifu?

There's just something about Kallie mayne

Thats not true though, you are literally guaranteed five figures if you get a fight in the UFC.

cyborg
gabi
and
Mackenzie Dern
all of them the anti Ronda

>tfw i want to meme post about the bald PREMIER guy but i dont know his name

Alexei Auld. I don't know if he even watches mma tequila.

...

what does DYEL stand for?

That's a lot of fights

DYEL?

For you

Do You Even Lift.

smfh

youtube.com/watch?time_continue=3&v=kDSPeza7Wyc

>Wand looking to get heemd by the same nignog again

Question, how come Krazy Horse is allowed into Japan and Mike Tyson isn't?

What are the chances of Silva asking for a title shot and becoming champion again?
He is still in shape, and he pretty much ko'd Bisping in their last fight

he almost got dc too

Yakuza calling in favours probably.

>Krazy Horse is 5'5"

>i will never sniff her ass

DC, the LHW champion, was actually afraid to trade blows with a 42 years old Anderson Silva
how crazy is that

Why are hues always obsessed with asses and human shit?

anderson didnt even have a camp. i just wish he stops fucking around every fight

It's a monkey thing

he cant, he gives no fucks anymore
he is there just for money and memes, Anderson is like a real life memer, but if he somehow managed not to fuck up he could easily beat Bisping, he had plenty of chances, like that front kick

tuf rose is the goat mma waifu

Post your face when Bisgoat clips Hendo and after Hendo goes down he does the leaping forearm strike on Hendo.

...

Ryan bader... one day.

Joanna should be the headlining bout, He's one of the most exciting fighters and champions the UFC has IMO.

ell oh ell

>Cruz

>rationalizing Pooinloo Jaideep and Ishii

C'mon son, I love Fedor too but this is reaching.

>implying anyone is making the argument that 2016 fedor is the goat

If I only can book off work for one, should I book off for 204 or 205?

>(You)

205 could have some meme prelim shows like 200 so that

steroids

?

what's your workout routine?

>The """""Greatest""""" of all >timeThirty-three (33) wins
>Of those, only three (3) are big wins, one of them only made big becase the guy kicked his ass (Sonnen)
>Brazilian
>AND black
>Roid cheat
>Upkick cheat
>Cheap shotted Bisbong and still lost
>Seven legged spider
>Tapped by literal who chinks early in his career
>Holds BJ Penn as the GOAT (pleb)
>Used to walk into Pride's ring to child rapist music
>Heemed by Weidman after being le madman
>Fought so shitty at Abu Dhabi that they didn't have a UFC event in like 5 years
>Pretends to have shittier English than he has
>Has the most deluded fanbase in all of MMA

Crying into his keyboard while trying to type "stipe tapped"

is there any mexican fight in the UFC or are all of them """"mexicans""""""" like Cain

lol btfo

>mexico

If he stopped memeing he would still be on top probably. But saying that memeing was why he got famous so it's a catch twenty two I guess.

shook

>If he stopped memeing he would still be on top probably.

Where do you people come up with this bullshit? Memeing was half of his game and it only took a guy with longer reach and decent boxing to sleep his ass.

>Weedman
>Decent boxing

Lad.

the truth is, Silva is one of the few fighters that people are still going to watch, no matter who he fights and how bad he is right now
I can see Silva at UFC 300 and people would still watch it
and thats mainly because of his meme style of fighting

just looked at the rizin card, apart from Cro Cop it's pretty shitty

Kron Gracie fighting some can as a main event, what a joke

When is Wanderlei fighting anyway?

Yair Rodriguez

its good, he trains with matt hardy u casual

Lad.

fucking 189 was the last truly spicy UFC card

its effective and thats what counts

let me fix that for you

>stipe
>dc
>jacare
>wonderboy
>khabib
>aldo (conor vacates)
>dj
>nunes
>jj

Stipe
Jones
Bisbong
Conor
Conor
Conor
Conor (Diuretics are legalized)
A literal who from the TUF season
Nunes
JJ

Jones
DC
The Chris (Brazilian killer)
Wonderboy
Alvarez
Aldo
Dj
Nunes
[spoiler]Kowalkiewicz[/spoiler]

>wonderwoman

I like the nickname 'Waterboy' more tb h

Who is the next signing in the Rizin bigbitchesweight divsion?

Stipe, DC, Cuckold, Maia, Khabib (he will be sitting on that shit until at least 2018 after he chucks Alvarez out of the cage), Aldo, Cruz, DJ, not gonna try on women's

Ugly OP. Too many events.

You mean 199.

What time is RIZIN lads?

>op matters

I hope you get shot in the back, pig.

who cares

fucking zuffashills i swear

i would get submitted by everyone here

but there's one thing... i black out before i tap out biatchhh

2 AM

remember that elbow weidman landed on mark munoz? savage shit, anyone got a webm

Nice timezone you've got there

such a little bitch reply.

What did you watch last night? Did you watch Invicta on UFC Fight Pass? I didn't. I watched CES on AXS.

You dont get AXS though, do you? Nah, youre too poor. Little low income bitch.

Know your place, bitch.

Where did that image originally come from? I hate /u/daveAP and I don't like the good name of /heem/ being on the same flier as that nolife faggot.

fuck you asshole, get in my guard right fucking now

2 AM EDT, 11 PM PDT, 7 AM BST

>/u/daveAP
Literally whom?

What fight are you most hype for right now? For me its Lineker vs Dodson and JJ vs KK

I bet you've never seen WIMMA, pleb

I want to see Romero run off the cage and superman punch Weidman for 10 minutes before he gases and The Chris wins by GNP

lmao at this triggered white knight faggot

god he is a cunt

This desu. Fuck Conrad.

DaveAP is a cunt, tranypanda is fucking GOAT though

Why do you people think that you need MMA experience to knock someone with MMA experience out in a street fight?

reddit is down the hall to the left

I bet you wouldnt fight in it though.

Cred Forums is that way

>liking conor
go to le reddit casual

SECOND
GREATEST
DAY
OF
MY
"""">>LIFE

I bet youve never been heemed but believe you me I will be conducting some sweet chin music of your choice

I dont know about GOAT but he's a legit fight fan and knows a lot.

t. butthurt 196ers

>gave chael the best dream of his life for 29 minutes
>hue'd him to sleep
>confirmed he was not only GOAT but also troll of the year of all years
>mexico still hurt

Who thinks that oshea? Nobody thinks that

...

mouth piece flys out at the speed of light

no really just think conor is a cunt, you'd have to be a kid to find him funny. Any one else just think hes like the childhood bully who never grew up

yeah a lot of fightfans wouldn't step into the cage. it's nothing new

>yfw Stipe heems Cain, Werdum, JDS and Ngannou in that order

/jojo/

>Cerrone def. Story via TKO (everything)

>Rizin co main event is waifu fest
Welp I'm watching it now

does she have snapchat?

This is the deadest /heem/ has been for years
Rip MMA

There's nothing to discus, really. And a lot of the nonAmericans are probably catching up on their sleep so they can stay up for the card tonight.

No way I'm staying up for this card tbqh

Post Great White Hopes
>Stipe
>Wonderboy
>Cowboy
>Conor
>Gus
>Cruz

Didn't you hear me
Mixed Martial Arts as a competitive sport, is dead.
We have peaked and are on a steady decline, as made blatantly clear by the lack of MMA discussion on this online Himalayan Agriculture forum

I dont think anyone would blame you desu

Natty Northcutt, guys.. (ha ha!)
youtube.com/watch?v=bTWuJeHUZFw

>>Used to walk into Pride's ring to child rapist music
MJ is fucking awesome you pleb faggot. I should go out and heem a random mariachi in retaliation.

You're going to stay up and shitpost and you'll like it
I'll fly over there and heem ya stiff, buddeh

>Boлoдя Cтoянoв

my sides are ded

Do you?

mmafighting.com/2016/9/24/13026542/dominick-cruz-ufc-fs1-bantamweight-champion-broadcast-booth
>"The color commentators would just say ‘weird' and ‘awkward,' instead of asking me what I was doing face-to-face. They never even thought of that. They would just give their opinion on what they saw and that's it."

Cruz shit talking his competitors before he jumps in the ring tomorrow.

well, 6 hours from now.

nerd

just wake up buddy, is gonna be a long day

i fucking love this guy

What was meant by this?

SUPER SCARED CORNCUTT

Literally the GOAT

cyborg documentary is pretty good
youtube.com/watch?v=Wcj64LDGrhc

Daily reminder that Aldo is the most compelling fight for Conor, and if you think Alvarez would be more exciting, you're a cuck

suck your mom prick

Cruz is doing commentating for Cyborg vs Lansberg and in the article he briefly speaks about doing things better than commentators have done before.

I was exaggerating, but as a fighter I think he's displaying a competitive mindset even for commentating.

Actually Nick Diaz would be most exciting if he doesn't finish conor in the first 3 rounds

Lmao, "weird and awkward" was basically all Rogan said during Cruz vs Faber 3.

It would be a memefest, but nick hasn't fought in forever. Aldo vs Goobz will be competitive with Conor having a good chance of losing.

>mmafighting.com/2016/9/24/13026542/dominick-cruz-ufc-fs1-bantamweight-champion-broadcast-booth
>talking about burning ants with a magnifying glass like the fucking autist from toy story
dom is somethin else

I love Cruz's weird brand of autism, dude is a trip.
>THEY DON'T WANT YOU TO WIN, THEY DON'T WANT YOU TO WIN

Cruz is probably the most analytical fighter ever. And not just comparatively; usually, a "smart" fighter isn't really all that smart by real world standards, because in a sport where you get punched in the face for a living, it's not hard to be the smarted guy around. But Cruz is legitimately intelligent, and has worked that into his fight game.

That's also why Conair is hailed as such a good trash talker, because it's easy to talk circles around a bunch of half-retarded apes.

Aldo's chin is too weak. It takes one well placed shot to end the fight. Goobz has a hard time against people that can take a punch. If baby Nate ate all those lefts and kept going, imagine how Nick would do. Nick's chin is better than Nate's.

me too man he is by far one of the greatest personalities we have
not to mention his skills as a fighter

Nicks capacity to take a punch exceeds that of what a chin can take
The last time he was finished was 2002 and I haven't even seen that fight, besides the doctor stoppage against KJ Memes

Tbh the 13 second loss doesnt say anything about the state of his chin. He was lunging forward and supplied most of the force of the punch himself. Werdum did the same thing vs stipe, and still took some good punches from browne, and that was heavyweight. I think if conor fights aldo again, theyll be shocked when there isnt another first round ko

Dom was chosen as /heem/'s boy long ago.

Cyborg is my boy , the way she cut weight is insane, respect

Nate got ko'd once and nick twice...but i see what you mean

He's wonderful

While I agree with you to a point, people did say the same thing about Lawler, and numerous others. You rally can't gauge a person's chin based on their past fights.

Cody will send him into the abyss

Why are there so many great fighters who are 5'9? Is it the goat fighter height? McGregor, Matt Hughes, Benson, bj Penn, woodley, big rigs, Alvarez etc. Even fighters like gsp and Dominic Cruz are close to it.

Gall bless

Yeah I think Aldo has a good chance of winning as well but like I said, all it takes is one well placed lucky shot and his legacy will be ruined. Conor's just too big for 145

Dom is a faggot.

If Nick is anything like what he was last time we saw him, it would be a missmatch.
Nick is just massive, the guy dwarfed Frank Shamrock, he really would make Connor look like a midget.
He can also knock people out with one punch, unlike his brother.

What could Conor do better than Daley?

5'9 is average height.
faggots who say 5'10 is average height are WRONG, i say, COMPLETELY WRONG.

...yep i'm 5'9

We all saw the Robin Black analysis you dipshit.

Quit acting like you're Dom Cruz, faggot Aussie cunt.

Unless;
>overeem
>bigfoot
>Aldo

Nick's the same height as Nate, but he's a better striker

good afternoon, my fellow cagefighting connoisseurs

are you ready for roy nelson

>tfw havent posted in heem all day

Barnett vs Junior dos Santos when?

Go watch mandrama if you want every fight to be a JUSTBLEED hockey fight, faggot. Cruz/Faber was great, especially if you've watched them fight before.

Nick is taller but nate looks taller in almost all the photos

I feel sorry for any fighter than has to share a card with cruz. That guy doesnt draw for shit.

Wiki says they're 1.83 both

He's co-main or fox tier

...bisping @ 199?

>Total gate $2,168,675
>Buyrate 320,000

this is bad, right? source: memepedia

...

I have a feeling if Aldo forces conor to lead, Aldo will be able to dodge big punches, or at least get caught at the end of them so he doesnt feel the power of them. Also, if he makes it past the 2nd round, his chances of winning will skyrocket, cause Conor will start to gas and lower his output. Also the power will fade. Aldo is 7-0 in five rounders that go the distance.

domestic abuse qt russian striker

...

It's not great. Now imagine if faber/cruz was the main event. Yikes.

...

will a card ever be as good as 199?

he draws me :3

WHO HAS THE BEST CHIN IN THE HISTORY OF THE SPORT?

NAME 3 CONTENDERS

...

shook

nelson has the best chin, no question

Why do people keep acting like aldo got his chin deleted? Frankie landed clean on the chin a few times and Aldo ate them. And before anybody says that doesnt count cause frankie has pillowfists, frankie clean KOd chad.

202 was pretty decent
205 looks like a nice quality memefest

griffin vs shogun card was quite perfect too
there are always 2-3 goat cards every year

>Nick is taller than Nate
>Nick has better muscles
>camera angles

Homer Simpson

Nelson
Hunt
Nick

Frankie has no power
Chad has depleted chin

>9/25: RIZIN 2 - Gracie vs Tokoro

comfy

*dabs*

Nate looks huge in that picture

>202 was pretty decent
You're joking, right?

202 was the best card of the year if you exclude 199 and we all know why 199 surpasses it.

In 202 you have a main card heemfest and a main event that lives up to the hype with a 25 minute back and forth between Goober and Nate.

"Pretty decent". Nigga.

ye him and dem bitch teets

...

...

N8 for sure is up there
Condit
Chris Lebin

just off the top of my head

Nick is the better fighter

>that sweep

I would kill to have one day of wrestling training by Dom

Prime N8

keep the spicy rollers coming, senpai

>Godofredo Pepe

Not particularly

...

Really cool doc. Makes me root for Cyborg.

Nice one, lad

i'll have to disagree, my man. MMA math says otherwise

god afraid of pepe

to be honest I think there's better value in de la torre but how can I not bet on a guy named pepe?

>there is an alternate universe in which RDA didn't stub his toe and fought Conor

yeah he is easily taller than nick

>obese yank

yeah

yeah but Nate is a nicer guy

>high test lad

I kinda want to see TJ vs Garbrandt more then Cruz vs Garbrandt/TJ

high test lad killed himself, that's chavcuck

How would this fight have gone down? I feel like Conor could have DEC'd him.

damn straight

Oh yeah, there's a card tonight

>mom

RDA would have got over aggressive and would have walked into that left.

>current year
>using high unironically

kek

>JJ vs KK
What's got you so excited for that? I like JJ but I'm sort of expecting her to run through KK really

hey

ts is a qt

>yeah but Nate is a nicer guy
[citation needed]

I've seen Nick training people at their gym, he seems chill as fuck even giving lessons to absolute newbs

anyone have the webm of the awkward camera guy sitting next to Vanessa?

>[citation needed]
don't know what this means lad

And yeah both are great, I just think Nate is nicer

conor and usada tag teamed chads chin way before fronk came along bud

>high test lad confirmed

welcome back m8

A reminder that JJ is cuter than KK

I didn't know Kyoji Horiguchi lived like a neet.

...

need 3 new threads soon

I'm not him lad

My boy

Is this the worst fight card of the year?

>Feel like I'm a upper tier casual fight fan
>Can bring up fights, fighters and moments most plebs can't even recall
>Get hype about Khabib and watch all his fights, highlights and videos
>Interviews reveal he's a devout fucking mudslime
>My inner Cred Forums gets triggered and I can't root for him anymore

>mfw

lad, the results are conclusive.

no it is a fun card top to bottom and it's free

>uses a chair instead of a bed

not a neet

The "Guchi" Life

It's irrelevant top to bottom.

Do you wanna be a fuckin fighter?

youtube.com/watch?v=u90JrlHVwjk

It's alright m8, soon the meme will lose and his undefeated streak will be broken, once that happens you won't even want to cheer for him

nate looks taller because hes thinner

>doesn't see it's a rolling table over an (obviously) King single bed
>TV and consoles are on wheels to pull towards bed for maximum comfy
You need to work on your comfy NEET friend

renan barao = JUST

Yeah I'm not going to watch two metal head just bleed fans break down fights

The guy who will always be remembered for not being able to beat Jeremy Stephens

yeah you have no idea what comfy is, i live in a bed

what did he mean by this?

Yeah it's a nightmare card for casuals

can someone spoonfeed me a good stream site to watch UFC events on that works on mobile?

I always just download torrents but I'd like to watch some one the go. Doesn't need to be the newest and latest event.

no that's fucking illegal goof

UFC fight pass. You're welcome.

firstrowsports.eu

i use them for every event because i'm not a millennial

I gave him that fight actually and regardless it proved that he can hang with top fighters after moving up a weight class.

No, do the work yourself lest the ghost of Simo Häyhä haunt you for your lacking efforts.

joanna is so hateable

Check r/mmastreams half an hour or so before an event, they list all the streams there and will tell you whether it works on mobile.

GO BACK TO THE DZANGLE

get out

so are u desu

>My inner Cred Forums gets triggered and I can't root for him anymore

oh I didn't mean live streams. I meant streaming video like you can stream tv shows or whatever. of past events.

Fake fightfan pls leave

So why is he fighting this guy?

I gave Frankie the Henderson fight but that doesn't make him world champion.

New

kys

Connor is doing a podcast on neo western films. Is there anything this guy can't do?

>16 POSTS early
>Schaub in the op

This thread doesn't even have 490 posts yet my man.

i hope a moderator is around to clean up this trash.

You say this as if Jeremy Stephens is a bad fighter.

You got something personal against Barao mate? Your post comes off weird.

>jerememe stephens
>good

pick one

Schaub bless

can you imagine he bangs his gf in that little room

>gf

>not separate fightan and politics

Leave all that behind when the cage door close.

JUST

do you think a truly devout muslim that followed the quran to the T would be a professional mma fighter?

yeah

Cool it casual

kawai nee tsugoi

How to spot a casual who thinks he's a fight fan