Hello, Colgate? I bought your product and it made me feel like a piece of SHIT

Hello, Colgate? I bought your product and it made me feel like a piece of SHIT

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youtu.be/443LW_pXhq8
youtube.com/watch?v=AtbMnixO2nc
imdb.com/name/nm1796602/?ref_=ttfc_fc_cl_t2
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

His bit on hot pockets was good.

Hahahahhahahahahahaha reminds me of when I was also 12

>tfw mall santa insults your shirt

MENS

ASSES

FASHION BUG

What did he mean by this?

ALRIGHT

WHO WRINKLED MY RANDY TRAVIS POSTER
PISSED IN THE SEAT
AND HID MY KEYS?!

Let me tell you about a porcupine's balls

what a legend

OH BOB SAGET

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT A PORCUPINES BALLS... THEY'RE SMALL, AND THEY DONT GIVE A SHIT!!

BITCH

*I LOVE YOU*

Don't remember exactly what he said, but the bit when the janitor yelled at him about clogging the toilet and he just kept saying how he took a big shit was kino.

>tfw you realize the memes of early 2000 were all fake

Really causes my neural cells to depolarize by opening gated channels in the membrane and passively diffusing potassium ions out of the cytoplasm down its concentration gradient leading to a sequence of action potentials to stimulate in accord with long term potentiation pathways developed through the release of seratonin at key moments of sensory input.

....FUCK SALT

>tfw people still try to pass off fake memes in the year of our lord 2016

They're real to me, god dammit!

NO
NO
NO

BUTTFUCK!!!

>he's sitting there watching tv
>his kid hits him with the door

We're gonna be out of the butt and into the fuck if we don't come up with that 36 dollars

Calm down, calm down! Don't get A BIG DICK!!

Who's that faggot with the tuba?

>Last time I gave a shit I GOT FUCKED!
I say this all the time.

DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT TOTAL

It's not mickey mouse it's TIT DIRT

>early 2000s
nigga this was 2008+ at least.

I LIKE HOW AFTER HE GETS TRANSFERRED TO A SECOND PERSON HE REPEATS >THE ONE WITH TARTAR CONTROL BUT IN A SLIGHTLY MORE ANNOYED TONE AND A FASTER SLUR

VERY NUANCED COMEDY

WHO'S THE FAGGOT WITH THE TUBA

TONIGHT ON UNSOLVED MYSTERIES

YOU'RE 80 YEARS OLD AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHO ALF IS?

*hangs up phone*

HE'S A LONG LEGGED, PISSED OFF PUERTO RICAN!

GO COUNT YOUR DICK

There's girls everywhere dumbass.

FASHION BUG

no
NO
NOO
BUTTFUCK

>He played data on Star Trek
>Oh yeah, I wonder what he's doing nowadays
>He's probably getting FUCKED in the ASS.

YOU CAN GO TO JOLLY PIRATE DONUTS AND TAKE A 2 HOUR SHIT FOR ALL I CARE

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN A PETER PAN PEANUT BUTTER ALERT?!?!

this is my new favorite insult

youtu.be/443LW_pXhq8

Classic.

HEY THERE'S A WHOLE LOT OF FUCKING GOIN ON IN THIS ROOM

PISSING OUT THE WINDOW, AND SHITTING OUT THE WINDOW, ARE TWO DIFFERENT THINGS

fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck
*crash*
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKK

AHHAHAHAHA YOUR GRANDPA'S AN ASS

Wow, that really made me think.

I'm gonna go take a piss, and when I get back, I'm gonna talk about the Mighty Duck movies.

Dad I heard she was a lesbian.
That just means she likes what I like
*corn dog freeze frame*

HOLY SHIT! I GOTTA GO SOME SQUIRRELS FUCKIN MY TOMATOES

link

Are we gonna fuck or what?

youtube.com/watch?v=AtbMnixO2nc

Sounds like the opening to a Tourettes Guy movie trailer

...FUCKSALT

no, it really wasn't. closer to mid 2000's 04-06 i think.

bitch, i love you

Dad I heard he killed himself.

I would kill myself too if my last name was...COOOOOMMMBS.

I remember seeing this shit in 2006, so wrong.

who's that faggot with a tuba?

Dad, your son just fell down the stairs

WELL QUIT IT

I'D KILL MYSELF TOO IF MY LAST NAME WAS
COOOOOOOOOMBS

>that piece of newspaper that lands perfectly on his face

>member tourettes guy?

Is this outtakes for Trailer Park Boys?

AH BOB SAGET

>walks into McDonalds
>LOOK AT THESE DUMB MOTHERFUCKERS
>DAD
>son hits face on door while leaving

DON'T TALK SHIT ABOUT TOTAL

What is this? Bring a SHITLOAD of mashed potatoes day? HUH?!

>You're lucky it wasn't hard.
>I mean this thing, not my dick!

THIS IS THE SECOND TIME I'VE BEEN FUCKED BY DAIRY QUEEN!

that's our dad!

>he still makes videos
>they do well enough on Youtube
>only releases one a year.

THATS OUR DAD O MY GOD

Can we please make tourettesposting a thing?

>FUCK YOU HEAD & SHOULDERS! YOU FAGGOT!

AHHHH SHIT

No matter how stupid this is it's still funny even today

>Magnum PI Theme plays
>Runs out of the room

EVERY. TIME.

>Just how much ass are we talking about?

>I hope this is the Puff Daddy version of this song and not that Sting piece of SHIT
>...
>"Every breath you take..."
>FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

What was his fucking problem?

>I'm not wearing this cologne for you, I'm wearing it for that BITCH at CHURCH!!

His wife was fucking everyone in Bismark.

>you've got some shit on your nose
>just a little piece of shit right there on the end of it
>YEAH

...

SORRY

it was around 2006 when he started getting well known on youtube. i was pretty bummed when it became obvious that it was an act (the episode with his supposed father).

>this better be the p. diddy version of this song and not that sting piece of SHIT...

had lot's of laughs back in the day

Fuck off.

...

>watching Tom Cruise flip out on Oprah on the TV
>HE'S NOT PLAYING WITH A FULL DICK

>What are you're opinions on George W. Bush?
>You mean "Colonel Cluster Fuck"?

FUCK SALT

...

Ah, lol so random, the retard version. Straight from uncanny valley, the brain spastic who thinks it's funny to shout incoherent shit.
It's a sad world where people find their humor aligns with a complete fucknut and it doesn't give them pause.

...

WHAT THE HELL'S A PETER PAN PEANUT BUTTER ALERT

This better be the Puff Daddy version of this song! And not that STING piece of SHIT!!!!

Just laughed for 5 minutes straight

FUCK THE PHILIPPINES

They can phillipp my ass

imdb.com/name/nm1796602/?ref_=ttfc_fc_cl_t2

>It made me feel like a piece of shit
What did he mean by this? Seriously asking.

>TALKING SHIT ABOUT TOTAL