Just saw this. Holy shit, it was a real stinker. Worst movie I've seen since The Conjuring 2 (my friends like bad horror movies but I enjoy their company), like I knew shaky cam was dead but holy shit
there were two good scares: a tunnel crawling scene and someone pulling something fucked up out of their foot. the other 82 minutes were people reacting to loud noises and running around in the dark
3.5/10
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Crawling through the drain pipe triggers me.
It's pure pottery the shaky cam genre started with the Blair Witch and ended with the Blair Witch
t. a Saw fan
It wasn't great but it wasn't that bad
That bit with the stick man breaking the girl was fucking excellent and worth it just for that
>he paid money for this shite
Serves us right
The crawling through the tunnel scene was a total ripoff of Exorsist: The Beginning.
Blair Witch was shit from start to finish.
The rlm vid made the witch sound like slenderman is that true?
is this a reboot or a sequel?
Another film where everybody dies, nothing is explained, and nothing of consequence occurred. Awesome. That's never been done before. How could they have ever thought of something so novel?
Nah, it was a total rip off of Shawshenk Redemption
I saw her as more of a spriggan, which would actually be cool if they went with that.
The movie does a terrible job of setting any type of rules for what she is and can do. Plus, they fucking actually showed her.
near certainty that you cannot explain why that happened
Are you a retard?
My friends and I counted: there are SIX instances of false jump scares (one of the group jumping in front of the camera saying "HEY WATCHA DOIN"), arguably more. The characters are beyond stupid, and the film is lacking in any subtlety whatsoever. They're only lost for literally one-two days (in their time, blah blah I know about the time loop stuff). The only part worth watching is the scene in the house, but then the movie ruins that too with the "if you don't look at her she cant hurt you!!" retcon rule, which is completely retarded.
It's a 2/10 at best. It was like some D-movie your find on Netflix or at Redbox.
Goddamn it I don't give a fuck about opinions I just want this film to premier in my country already!
t. A MASSIVE fan of The Blair Witch Project.
Doesn't make it any less awesome since there's plenty of shit they slung out there that can't be explained.
sounds like you went in looking to hate it outright which is a cool thing to do. I love how you dropped it 1.5 points just from shitposting on Cred Forums. I'm glad you had a crap time watching it. It genuinely pleases me that you paid money AND had a terrible experience. Because you're a cunt.
Set your expectations low. It's not as awful as OP (remember kids: they're always faggots) says but it can't hold a candle to the original.
OP here, it bothered me that the witch had voice imitation powers and you couldn't look at her
like oh wow it's... a weird spidery kinda lady
"t. ..." goes at the end of the post
t. expert
t. DUDE JUST TURN YOUR BRAIN OFF LMAO
Jesus, son, it was just banter... there's no need to cry about it. It's all anonymous - no one can see you.
There were so many fake-out jumpscares, even the girl character said, "Jeez, would everyone just stop that!" after the 3rd time someone else randomly popped out from nowhere accompanied by a loud sound.
I really wanted to love this movie, but they fucked it up so badly. So many wasted potential.
Talk about a let down.
>Paper thin characters
>Paper thin character motivation
>Unauthentic dialogue
>Shits on the ambiguity of the first film
>Pointless plots and universe rules out the ass
>Shit tier ending
>Showing the witch
>Witch is literally lanky long mouthed creature from every fucking found footage film
They should've just made a comfy film about a bunch of kids dying in the woods and without it being found footage. There was so much potential but I feel like they really phoned this in. Maybe well get a neat directer cut or something.
Damn...really makes you think
>Maybe well get a neat directer cut or something.
>Directors cut
>Three more scenes with the witch
>One is a long face shot
>several more scenes of them talking about the new backstory of the witch
>two more scenes of them in the house just acting scared
>subplot about the witch wanting love
>turns out she is misunderstood
>they all die anyway
>tree rape scene
I can live without it
>subplot about the witch wanting love
Keke
>Subplot about the witch wanting love
Please elaborate
Yes.
can someone please explain their theory on how she manipulates time, or how much time has taken place?
the bearded guy said "you look exactly the same" as if he had been in his own world for yrs.plus, how long does it really take to grow a full on nu-male beard?
also, the tape that was used to lure the brother out there--was FILMED by the brother when he was running in the house.
Because when Elly Kedward (the blair witch) was strung up to die in the wilderness, she was captured by ayy lmao's that gave her time traveling abilities and a pocket dimension.
I haven't seen it yet but this is about what I'd expect from Wingard, dude is a hack. Honestly most of these hyped modern horror directors are pretty bad.
It was still better than this.
At least Blair Witch 2 tried something. It sucked, don't get me wrong, but at least it tried. Unlike this remake/reboot.
If you made a Blair Witch sequel, what would you do?
hire autistic teenagers to reenact the same shit the original actors did in the first movie in the same forest
Bascially the same shit as the first movie, but use some expensive practical effects with your higher budget. Like a forest fire, lightning storms or some trippy dead souls marching through the forest scene.
I had hopes for it because of the initial hype, and how a lot of the criticism sounded like criticism of the first one (which I like), but god damn, it was a disappointment.
I don't even like the criticism that this movie is a copy of the first. It isn't. At least the first built a mythology and had the characters actually trying to do things. All this movie does is introduce stupid ideas and show the characters doing pretty much nothing. They're basically only out in the woods for two days, and they spend almost all of it at one location, where nothing interesting happens. And nothing new in the movie is explained or makes any sense.
The sheer lack of plot makes me think this is one of the worst recent horror movies I've seen.
>judging a piece outside its context
yeah and youre a brilliant mind.
Have the characters be a group of autistic fans of the original who go into the woods to try to have an experience, or maybe try to film some kind of Marble Hornets-ish web show. Then have shit happen to them, which could either be the witch, locals fucking with them, or a crazy member of the group (in other words, ambiguity like existed in the first one). All die eventually.
>Have the characters be a group of autistic fans of the original who go into the woods to try to have an experience
They already did that with Blair Witch 2.
>try to film some kind of Marble Hornets-ish web show
ayy lmao
twas beauty that killed the beast
it can't possibly be worse than The VVitch? that flick plays like its christploitation from 1870s that is laughable when viewed by modern audiences. PAGANS WILL EAT YOUR BABIES, THEY SMOKE THE DEVIL REEFER AND HAVE SEX ORGIES IN THE WOODS!
anyway blair witch was always pretty garbage so i don't know what you expected. from what i've seen they just decided to completely unsubtle their shit up and make it as schlocky as possible.
>They already did that with Blair Witch 2.
Yeah, and the executive meddling is what turned it into a pile of shit. It's still a pretty good concept for a Blair Witch sequel, and possibly the only one that would actually work in context.
The popularity of vlogs, internet conspiracy shit, and things like Marble Hornets even likelier to be successfully executed now.
I was so hyped,.... But it turned out to be a 1/10 for me. Got so bored that I had to browse the net while watching to stay awake .
Going to rewatch the original tomorrow, still a great movie.
Was the witch herself actually revealed?
Yes, but the screenwriter insists it wasn't the "real" witch, and was just the original woman who was tied to a tree acting as a servant of her. Or something like that that also made no sense and served as a poor excuse for creating a boring design for something we didn't need to see.
>ditch the found footage meme
>make the woods way "thicker", maybe add some light fog
>frame the scenes from far back, trying to always keep some part of the woods on the screen
>very little camera movement and really long shots
>add some unnatural movement and shadows to the bushes/leaves but without making a big deal out of it
>all gruff male cast, make them a team of investigative journalists looking into the disappearances of the first movie
>they dismiss all the myths and don't act scared of a supernatural force
>distrust builds up as the weird occurrences keep happening each night
>a fight happens between character A and B late at night while the rest of the crew is asleep
>the fight scene is filmed in a single shot with the entire camp framed in it's entirety
>during the fight, character A has the drop on character B, who falls on the ground next to the bonfire
>character A in a moment of madness, forces character B's head into the fire, killing him
>character A starts sobbing and notices his hand is completely burned
>a loud shriek is heard
>character A stops crying and starts looking around, without getting up
>the other characters wake up with the noise, all visibly startled
>they notice the body and character A on his knees right next to it
>"I'm sorry." - Character A mutters, sobbing again
>one the crew members who was still looking for the source of the noise points towards the camera
>"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?"
>LOUD SHRIEK
>camera suddenly turns into the woods behind it
DIRECTED BY user
Yeah, it was obviously the director winking at the audience like "aren't jump scares awful, guise? :^)", but knowing they're bad doesn't make it any less worse.
>executive meddling
What was in the script is what was on screen.
how did she look
bloody-disgusting.com
It's widely acknowledged that the original premise of the movie was at least decent and Artisan changed a bunch of shit to make he movie more of a normal horror film.
Like naked slenderman. You never really get a clear, sustained view, but she's pale and her limbs are stretched out (due to the torture of the witch mentioned early in the movie).
would watch/10
So what was changed?
The story is still the same everyone agreed to and went forward with. This isn't Alien 3. The early drafts are still online.
Another fact, the studio "meddled" in the first one, too. There were re-writes and reshoots.
I don't mean to defend studios, but directors and their shills, like Bloody-disgusting absolutely is, constantly blaming their failures on muh studios is getting really fucking tired.
>mfw they forgot all about the shawl-wearing/hair-covered witch in the first movie
Kek
Looks like they realized they shit the bed and are desperately looking for excuses.
That goth chick was cute
If i did a blair witch film i would go full weird & abstract mindfuck horror. Original has been done so you might as well try something new and go full out. 80% of this film was just a terrible rehash
t. may-may novice
You're wrong. It's used at the end when it's for your post. It's used at the beginning when it's for somebody else's post.
t. may-may pro
I'd gradually build up the supernatural elements. Things would start out completely normal, and then things would get a little stranger, then a little stranger, and so on and so forth. Over the course of a week, they lose their shit completely.
Example: They try to use their GPS to navigate out of the forest, initially because they think the Blair Witch doesn't real and they're just bored. They take a look around, pick the right direction to go in (since a decent phone GPS will also function as a compass), and then continue on their way. Turns out, they weren't going in the direction they thought. The first couple of times this happens, they figure it's because the person using the GPS is an idiot. But at the end of this segment, they notice the GPS keeps changing their location, like they're teleporting or some shit. Right after the phone's battery dies, one of the hipsters in the forest remarks how it must have been glitching out due to low battery power, which the rest of the group accepts as fact because none of them understand how electronics work.
This sort of thing would go on well past the point where the "investigators" are scared (and hopefully, you, the viewer, are a bit uneasy as well). I would use a very good camera, but make sure the lighting is poor. This way, I can use cheap practical effects to great emotional impact; is that silhouette in the distance with feral hair and fingernails her? That's terrifying, I've never seen someone climb a tree that fast, etc.
Toward the end of the movie, it would be so plainly supernatural that no naturalistic explanation suffices, at least not for these hipsters. They descend into terror, paranoia, and violence, and ultimately kill each other because they start seeing each other in progressively more horrific lights. The conclusion is that Blair Witch likely does exist, but her "power" is probably limited to mind games, the scariest kind of power.
I watched the original yesterday and it feels like that whoever made it was just lucky/not completely incompetent just enough to make it work. I like how minimalistic it is, but it wasn't very scary except for the ending.
>Blair witch
>Its some weird skeleton bug
>No witch in sight
desu, with that funding they could have made a scary ass witch. Maybe even do something good with the original actors from the first movie showing up.
This one was trash, they cut the scenes like it was a fucking sushi roll. The only part that was funny was that the nigger died first because he was a smug ass dickface tyrone.
Also when he laughed at that nerdy kid that was the funniest part of the whole movie.