"If you're as charming as you are now, I'm sure they wouldn't stay in the room either."

They would ask you to leave too and order a couple of hot 14 year old French girls and bag of coke

All he literally had to do was give a light smile and say good one and immediately move on. Would have made her joke sound pretty flat and he wouldnt have come off as some butthurt celeb

Cucked : The Thread

/thread but you gotta admit this makes it really funny

KEEP TRYING OP, 09/09 NEVA FORGET

fat boy dreams

Hey look this thread again.

The correct response?

Completely change the subject right after the joke.

Not making it too obvious, but right when her joke finishes, he makes some random observation about the studio/another person in the room, completely changing the topic and making her feel ignored and stupid.

LISTEN TO ME YOU FUCKING SLUT
YOU'LL FUCKING REGRET SAYING THIS SHIT TO ME
I'M THE KING NIGGA, JONAH HILL

"The Jonah Hill Question" will be asked in university Philosophy classes for decades to come.

I'M THAT GORILLA DICK PUSSY GOD

How did this translate to French?

>According to The Hollywood Reporter, this isn’t the first time Fleury has courted controversy on the program. She referred to her co-host Brigitte Boreale, who is trans woman, as a “lady-gentleman” before joking about a possible threesome with the writer. This caused some outrage and a response from the Association of LGBT Journalists:

Holy shit, this whore is pathetic.

"DUDE JOKES ABOUT ME GETTING DOUBLE TEAMED IN A THREESOME LMAO" is literally her gimmick

"Eh I don't know how well that would work out for you, Leo and Brad usually only go for pretty girls. I like your confidence though."

literally costanza tier

9/9/16 a day that will live in neckbeard infamy.

THIS ACT OF AGGRESSION WILL NOT STAND

LE REEEEEEE

Her set-up to the joke seemed like she was about to give him the biggest compliment, look at how happy/flattered he looks, poor guy, little did he know that in about 10 seconds he'd go from feeling flattered/proud to being completely humiliated and embarrassed for all to see for the rest of eternity

>She referred to her co-host Brigitte Boreale, who is trans woman, as a “lady-gentleman”
BASED ORNELLA

wtf I love Fleury now.

>She's a frog! She's a frog! She's a frog!

urrggh its 2016

men can be women now, It doesn't matter if women dont have a y chromosome, penis, prostate

these things are social constructs designed by the patriarchy

she needs to check her biological privilege

Well as you can see i am quite partial to a creamed pie haha

>"How about I kick down your door in your shithole flat in nigger filled Paris, then tie you and your dunecoon sandnigger mudslime boyfriend down then cut his rotted cock off and sodomize him with it, then kill him in front of you, then rape you until your asshole, cunt and mouth bleed you fucking whore."

I heard Raimi wrote the joke for him.

...

good

super edgy, great stuff m8

I like how he turns around to the disfigured actor to see if he got his back but he dont got it HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Damn, this bitch already RECKED him before she even got to the second half of joke

>I'm sorry who are you again?
moment she starts to speak
>yeah whatever, you got any more questions, otherwise I'll bounce

>mfw this meme didn't die
best thing to come of out Cred Forums in 2016

Like a boss

Bitch I got shit to dooooo!

>pull out my phone, connect to the studio wifi
>show her this video
youtube.com/watch?v=JnxDN5Bh4rA
Haha look at how cucked France is
BLACKED
L
A
C
K
E
D

>>pull out my phone, connect to the studio wifi
>>show her this video
these 'comebacks'

fat men will literally never recover.

>y-you too..
would have been the best response, actually.

t. triggered neckbeard

Just pathetic, please keep going.

This strong women of colour was the only one who should any sympathy for Mr. Hill.

Her "aww" probably made him feel even worse.

Also, Miles Teller confirmed for a bitch ass nigga. Should have had Jonah's back, instead just laughs with Stacy

this is a 10/10 in France

stay cuckt, frogs

Passed over for Leo and Brad? I can live with that.

god that chick is SO fucking CUTE.

>a year later
>it is YOU who is out, out of the room !! am I right teevee ?

she's pretty fucking hot fambo

anyone knows her name? i'm french but have no idea

She still wins because you sound butthurt. You have to take the bantz and dish it back out because it's not a big deal like

I like how Leo and Brad don't even defend Jonah after hearing about this

He could have done or said anything other than storm out and cry like a baby. He is a self-conscious douche.

'Yeah, and that is all that will be just a fantasy. But the reality is my pals would just get bored of you and leave and you would come back to me you would in reality."

no the logical response would be laugh in her face or mock her for how shit the joke was

I just know you're probably a fucking idiot european who thinks any bantz is automatically hilarious because you're easily amused but people here in the important world have taste

They don't find him a serious actor

Yeah, but I'm sure you would at least offer a pity fuck to her real-life sized doll while your mom weep silently in the corner.

It's a mathematical fact:

THERE IS NO POSSIBLE SCENARIO WHERE FRENCH STACY LOOSES TO THE HILL

Calm down Jonah. It's over.

>When, as is inevitable on His Earth, you depart this mortal coil your name will be lost to the ages. Only family may recall your even having existed. When my time comes, however, I will have left behind a lasting legacy. I've made millions laugh, scoff at that if you so choose, yet it's all some men have in their lives. A simple reprieve from the harsh realities of the world. A small, but lasting gesture, for which I will live on after mine own death.

...

Didn't he play a good fat jew in wolf of wallstreet though?

Like he would a perfect Violator if they made another Spawn movie.

If Jonah Hill lectured her he would have won.

He "lost" because he only half assed his lectured, he went all out it would have went viral in his favor with headlines "Jonah Hill puts French women in her PLACE"

How would they defend it without drawing more attention? No one here knows or cares about it. However, two of the biggest stars in the world start talking about it and everyone knows they're buddy get insulted in frogland.

Oh yeah, well the jerk store called and they're running out of you!!!

...

"i have seen this in my animes. You are clearly tsundere for me"

would destroy her and make her love Jonah at the same time. BOOM

france - 1
america - 0

This isnt over

>If Jonah Hill lectured her he would have won.

Pro-Tip Faggots: Any diss that involves her not being attractive wouldn't work.

She may be a piece of shit, but she's at least a 7/10

>You fucking skank ugly cuck bitch. I make more than you in a day than you make in a whole year. Leo and Brad make 50 times more than you. They would ask YOU to leave to get us some coffee because they'd mistake you for housekeeping.

>You are legitimate worm. Should I tell you why? I come on your show, fly to your country and you insult me to your audience in a language I don't understand. If you want this to be even why don't you come to america, come onto a set and see what I actually do, see how much money I earn for all the work I put in. But you won't, because I doubt you could afford a plane ticket, or you'd have to ask your boss for time off work. You see, my acting schedule lets me do fuck all for half the year, it lets me buy almost anything I want. But yeah, you still want me to leave ;). Bitch I wouldn't date you if you were the last woman on earth.

After he said all that, he'd stand up and proceed to shower the studio with money. He'd drop 100k right there because I could. He would laugh as the mongoloid stuido audience crawled around picking the money up. Then he would get his dick out and say the following:

>You cucks want to suck this? No? Well I will drop another 200k if you do. But no I won't do that, because you are all beneath me. Keep picking those bills up from the floor like pigeons fighting over bread crumbs. You might see Leo and Brad above me, and you're probably right about that. But look at you all. YOU'RE ALL BENEATH ME. How pathetic does that make you look? I'm outtttt.

Easy.

Its not that bad of a joke you could laugh at her for making it. Also wouldn't make sense to laugh at her if you weren't expecting an insult or any joke at all in an interview.

She's ugly on the inside and it shows. Boy does it show.

"Yeah ill be in the room next door, so when they both laugh in your face you can come into my room and i might consider it"

An assault of The Hill is an assault on The United States of America

>She's ugly on the inside and it shows.

This, which is wha really counts

"Oh I get it, I'm fat and you're a superficial slut"

>But he would be perfect for a capeshit character

They said "serious actor"

>laughter
>co-hosts look at you with the 'awwww' look

>No no ahah. . .it's okay its okay. Look in my position you kind of have to be able to laugh at yourself right. I know I'm chubby and I'm goofy looking and all that but in the end I'm in a life situation where literally all my wildest dreams have come true. And it's amazing, I'm so privileged. . so you kind of have to take the ridicule with that. And then look at you (point to girl) and you're sharing your wildest dreams with me. . .and it's kind of sad that they will never come true, and there's really nothing you can do about it. So I'll take the banter

So what? Shout AllahAkbar and mimic machine gun fire?

This its the only serious response

>pull gun
>shoot her in the face

Wala, Fatso won.

...

>but she's at least a 7/10

Jonah should learn from the best. Get some tips from Andy, man.

youtube.com/watch?v=VN3zrFBXynw

Not that bad to be honest

but compared to actual life destroying shit like patrice vos or bob kelly smashing it's so sterile i wouldn't even recognize it as someone who is supposedly "funny"

girls cant bantz in the first place because they dont actually go for the throat they tap out with corny ooh i wouldnt fuck you hehe id just laugh in her face like goofy hoe without your pussy you aint got shit to say inthe first place

>He should have gotten red in the face and delivered a lengthy diatribe to debunk her brief, forgettable gag
That would have shown her.

Exactly it should be more like

Jews - 0
France - 1

If you shouted that she would sleep with you. She likes them mussies.

How about "you might be pretty enough for the night but that's all anyone wants from you"

lol Conan pulled captain america before captain america.

Conan is a REAL bro unlike that faggot Miles Teller

Miles Teller laughed at Stacy's joke, while Conan makes a "wtf___unimpressed.png" face.

Okay

>wow you set me up for that one haha, really had me going. You mind if i borrow that?

Move on

She's a self-professed slut. I don't think she'd care.

>make a sad expression
>say "that's not the worst time someone said that to me"
>look off to the side in thought

>youre so fat youd float in water
>well....youre so MEAN...your cold heart would make you float in water

wow...great """"""""zinger""""""

>Okay. So, about my movie...

...

Because Conan and Andy are actually funny people who write actual funny stuff unlike Jonah and those other people at that show. Going after weigth, looks etc is considered extremely weak in their circles as you can see from conan's face.

this

Will hillretorting one day replace baneposting?

>Conan is a REAL bro
>is a liberal

nah, fuck off

are you 12?

Andy made her look like an ass.

Break down in tears. Recount the harrowing weight loss story. Reveal incontinence.

"Don't you have some snails to eat?"
that would have rekt her to oblivion and back

Doest Cred Forums still actually mad about Jonah being humiliated by some slut? Womans doesn't even have sence of humor, how the fuck could he lost conversation to woman? Fucking pathetic.

good thing he worded it and delivered it in a completely different way

What's this whole thread talking about? I missed this

I feel like everyone has moved on from this story but Cred Forums

Did she attack you where it hurts?

Her joke was stupid anyway. Most people float in water. The comedic misconception is normally that fat people sink.

Considering he had a dodgy premise to work off, it was a perfectly serviceable comeback. It focused on the fact that she was being a cunt, but didn't come across defensive or angry, and didn't damage the atmosphere for the rest of the interview.

>>youre so fat youd float in water
you didnt even get it you moron

Miles Teller is the underrated villain here, dude did NOTHING to defend Jonah.

I think no one takes Jonah seriously, he's the clown friend. He makes everyone laugh, but he has no genuine bond with Leo, Brad, Miles, etc.

They don't view him as an equal (which is sad, as Miles is pretty beta himself), just a fat funny guy who provides comic relief. Completely non-essential, a prop of sorts, really.

What the fuck is this meme? I keep seeing this fatty and I have no context.

>"Don't you have some snails to eat?"

How about this?

"Wow your translator just messed up badly, they turned your anecdote about our sexual encounter into some petty insult"

fat jew can't handle batz

That's what makes it work though. Implying she still isn't attractive enough for Brad and Leo.

>Funny, it's funny because in real life I wouldn't even want to speak to you.

I'd say that would fuck her up bad.

"Well we all know it wouldn't be the first time French women spread their legs open for foreigners."

>just a fat funny guy who provides comic relief.
and delicious Subway sandwiches

I like this

10/10 you'd really have a way with any woman truly

It just come across as a 'waaaa she insulted me'.

yeah no

>You hurt my feelings, but I'll kill you tonight. I'm not even joking. I have enough money to hire some French thugs to snatch you from your bed and drag you through the streets of Paris all the way to my six star resort hotel penthouse suite where I've rented out three floors below so no one will ever hear you scream. But I will. The Hill will always love your screams. And the irony will be that you didn't want to see my face in your little fantasies, but now in the real world the last thing you'll ever see is my smiling mug, so content knowing that just hours before you had smugly thought you could pull one over on me. You might think that saying this in front of all these people somehow condemns me, but look around you, nobody is saying a word, nobody is calling security, no one is batting an eye. No one likes you. Everyone here has wanted to do exactly what I'm talking about for quite some time, just because of your entitled and overblown ego that you've developed through nothing but being marginally pretty enough to get special treatment. You've got four hours to live now, and however far you think you can run into the French countryside my people will find you. Enjoy yourself, maybe the satisfaction of making that little joke at my expense will make you feel safe and warm in this last little bit of time you have. I'll see you later in my room, Brad and Leo won't be there to save you.

"Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. Real good one *stands up and starts clapping* -voice raising- SOOOOO GOOD, WOW. WOW. EVERYONE CLAP FOR THE SLUT, SHE MADE A 'FUNNY'. AHAHA-AHAHHA. WOW, THIS *gets in her personal space* DUMB -right up to her face- stupid fucking NOBODY thinks she's a tough girl now, yeah? *takes glass of water and pours on her* OOOH, ooooooh. Now I made you WET, huh? Just like Leo would, right? Fuck you -takes off mic and walks off set-

ITT: Cred Forums tries to process its collective trauma from getting bullied in high school by coming up with comebacks for a guy they don't know and will never meet in a situation that has already happened and cannot be changed anymore

I don't get it. Is the meme that the comebacks are purposefully bad? Or is this seriously the best you've got?

that will show her!

guys, you have it all wrong.

he was supposed to melt her icy heart with a warm island song

Why didn't he roast the bitch like he did with Sarah Silverman?

>youtube.com/watch?v=yYG_RBpLzqQ

He probably needs to be self-depreciating to a point for any comeback to work without sounding butthurt.

"Well let's be honest I'm probably the best you could get with that personality."

>implying any of you would pull lines like this on the spot

you fags would just mumble incoherently

>i don't get it

Congrats on being legitimately retarded.

"Only reason Brad and Leo would showing up is so us three can head to Subway so I can get away from your surrender monkey ass."

the literally only good response would have been a WWII joke

>trying to get the last word for a celebrity

What is with all the posts like this in these Jonah threads? How many assumptions about a literal stranger are you going to make?

>He makes everyone laugh, but he has no genuine bond with Leo, Brad, Miles, etc.

How many actors have a "genuine bond" with each other?

>They don't view him as an equal
Jesus

The amount of overly confident guesswork and projection in these threads is sad. So many posts here indicate that a sizable portion of Cred Forums seems to view Hollywood relationships as some kind of high school fantasy. I couldn't care less about Hill but it's just unbelievably juvenile, and in the vast majority of these posts there isn't even an iota of irony to be found

all of you kill yourselves you literal redditors

"Heh, well thats quite the fantasy. Unfortunetly for you, theyre both happily married"

this has proven to be a truth of the universe

>because I could
Jonah is that you?

>he needs to be a cuck for it to be funny

wtf

why didn't he just call her a whore like people of the street do?

...

a lot of them are very bad but a good amount of them are passable

post something "good" you autist

Thats because roats are written beforehand by comedians

>Another "The Jerk Store called..." thread

Pathetic.

>That was a pretty good one I think there might be a role for you in my next movie.

Doesn't sound butthurt. Doesn't make a personal attack. But is still demeaning because not only his he not phased he's talking down to her in a way that looks courteous but is actually sarcastic. She loses no matter what she does.

Ok but you have to ask someone else to bring the 6 tall black men and the midget

>Men won't fuck hot girls if they don't have great personalities

nice meme

>>They don't view him as an equal
>Jesus
not fit person views any fat person as an equal dipshit.

neckbeards....Smh

>yeah, leave the jokes to me from now on

>more than two weeks later
>americans STILL can't handle the banter

"oh that's nice, my fantasy would be you'd been a Charlie Hebdo employee"

"yeah well i fucked ur mom" would've been the best response

You missed the point entirely

I hope this is bait you retard

>xD le banter is the best!!!

As said earlier, Americans have taste/class, you yuropoors think crude/tasteless banter is just inherently good for it's own sake

90% of this thread would cause her to start uncontrollably sobbing.

Jonah went easy on that kike.

>Unfortunetly for you, theyre both happily married"

...

Honestly this thread is full of replies that could work but it all depends on DELIVERY. You can say almost anything if you say it right.

If i have learned something it's that women laugh at anything if you say it with confidence.

"Um, who said I'd ever go to a hotel room with you?"

Not really, if he cleverly used the mistranslation it couldve been funny

"i shutting YOUR BUTT down! I'm here to promote MY movie!"

not b8 fat boy....reality

>be Jonah
>french slut insults you live on air
>suddenly you come back with a sparklingly witty retort that's lightheartedly jovial enough to be playful and not spoil the atmosphere but stingingly pointed enough to satisfyingly shut down er ego while making the audience roar with laughter
>only to have French slut come back with a perfect reversal on your retort which tops you in every way, making the audience erupt in hysterical guffaws at your expense while she giggles from behind her desk

IT'S NOT FAIR

Wrong.

>Hill whips out his foot long.
>Shoves it right up the bitches pussy.
>gets down on his knees and gets righr between her thighs.
>Proceeds to eat the sub right out of her cunt before the whole audiences.
>Bitch can't contain herself.
>Never has she felt such pleasure from being eaten out.
>The climax she endures is so great she becomes legally retarded for it.
>She lies on the ground, moaning and panting like a dog in heat, begging The Hill for more.
>Hill at this point is already strolling out the door because he forgot to get a dozen cookies from Subway.

Gave me a hearty kek but would trigger the fuck out of the media.

No, not really you turbo autist.

>I have that same fantasy sometimes. Only you're no there at all. Just me, brad and leo.

nice try kid

but you'll have to do better than that to catch a fish like me

Serious question

How would have Donald Trump responded to this on the spot?

I'm starting to think it's jonah that keeps making these threads.

Wiping sweat from his brow with his small hands.

>You're fired.

Why does this meme trigger normies so much?

I bet he'd get 1k of death threats from sjws in an hour and lose his career in this case
Sucks to be a "fucking white male" in 2k17

>Yeah because Brad and Leo are going to fly all the way to France to fuck a weather girl

Quietly and happily rek'd

aka: 'You're their all-time best seller."

By buying her studio, firing her ass, making sure she never worked agian and ended up on the streets.
He would the find her one day on the corner, begging for change. At this point he would offer a few bucks only if she blew him.

should have just flipped her off and laughed

>normies
It's not normies getting bothered by this.

yeah no

probably make fun of her mannerisms and/or point out that he's donald fucking trump

>that disgusting gif

literally fucking kill yourself

Would she have said this to an unattractive black man like Patrice O'Neal?

It's true.

>"Well you're fucked as far as Brad's concerned. Did you know he raped Corey Haim? What a fucking pedo faggot! But if that's your type, by all means have at it! Me? I'm going to Subway. Wanna join?"

I missed this links?

why is that gif disgusting?

French girls love the BBC

>Patrice O'Neal
the patron saint of fat men

i think that's exactly what she aimed for (and succeeded), to get famous and viral on youtube and all that shit

How about,

"*laughs along* That's true, that's true... I think the only way I'd have a shot with a girl like you is if I went to a prostitute."

?

It's good to have friends in these situations. Had it been myself there my friend I would have gotten up an reenact the entire plane scene of Dark Knight rises.

If this photo doesn't make you feel comfy as fuck you're literally autistic

he's kinda dead i think

"Pause...Hmmm yes I agree! You should definitely get fuckt!"

>Put's on Sunglasses whilst eating a bag of cheese curls menacingly.

Miles Teller isn't a big enough guy

He would've interrupted soon as he sensed she was trying to do a joke and quip about how bad the translation setup is for comedy.

2 footlong buffalo chicken subs
3 chocolate chip cookies
1 Large Pepsi with extra ice

Thank you mum :3

But Jonah is.

>Cred Forums: the post

>That's a good one but I don't think Brad and Leo are gay.

Literally the only half decent one I've heard and even then it's not great.

For you.

Not winning vs Fridge

>2 footlong buffalo chicken subs
>3 chocolate chip cookies
>1 Large Pepsi with extra ice

Good answer.

Trump knows the power of interruption and frame control, "logical" responses rarely do the trick

Brutal.

>getting butthurt over a mildy repulsive reaction gif
*literally* kill YOU'RE self my man.

>haha u look like a guy xD

literally no better than 90% of the responses in these threads

>dude eating one big meal at subway makes you fat LMAO

are you 12

No, i'm just not american.

except she's pretty and everyone knows it

They don't even know who he is

"I'm a big fun of french movies, especially that of my matie Gaspar Noe, and they surely inspire my fantasies too, haha. So i look at you and realizing that we can reenact Irreversible tonight, hahaha"

So you can't even afford one meal

>TWO foot long subs????

whatever you need to tell yourself fat boy

"How 'bout this. You shut your mouth. Or I'll kick your teeth down your throat and I'll shut it for you."

That's fucking dark.

That's like a 3k calorie meal retard

He's obviously bringing one to McCarthy.

okay? that only makes the comeback worse

>one meal
>americans think that's ONE meal

Jesus.

what the fuck is wrong with french interviewers?
youtube.com/watch?v=_FWVKEtryvw

>written by Zach Synder

Then she tells him she doubts he can reach his legs high enough to kick past her shins.

No we don't.

Only delusional obese ones.

>So you think I'm funny?

>*slow clap* wow, that was funny. so funny i forgot to laugh. you hear that? that grade school line i just said? it's still far more clever than any response worthy of your pathetic attempt at humor. jesus, is that what gets laughs here in europe? you frenchies really have a lot of catchin up to do. the entire premise of your joke is that not only would those guys give you or any slut in your family or immediate group of friends the time of day, because believe me they wouldnt, but that me leaving is something i wouldnt want to do anyways. you know how much cash i have to wave around? enough to get far better tail than youre worth. that's real nice, btw, that the punchline to your little *air quotes* joke is you being spit roasted by rich men. that's the thing isnt it? even when you spout your little *air quotes* clever lines it boils down to why women arent funny all female comedians stem their humor from sex and periods. inherently, that's why they're largely inferior to men, because that's the only thing of value about you. just holes to fuck while men are taking breaks from actually advancing in philosophical and intellectual matters. i think we're about done here, i'm sure you have a lot of thinking to do. O revoir

>hes on a starvation diet

"At least I have bigger boobs than you."

rekt

Am I a clown? Do I amuse you?

Jonah, is that you?

hot af

Not even bobby fischer could solve this shit

>Was probably going to follow up with something inquiring about whether that made life and her career difficult for her.
>Spergs out

Sorry, you don't get to make millions of dollars a year for playing pretend in the public eye and then get upset when your life is publicized.

It's a scientific fact.

It's like he's posing with his stand or something

"sounds good, wouldn't wanna catch anything"

What, I don't even get to watch?

Jonah should be content knowing that she would fucking jump at the chance to play his love interest if offered the role in one of his movies.

>Honestly I've raped uglier women than you who get brought into our Jew sex parties on horse tranquilizers, so it'd be a little disheartening I couldn't stick my Jonah in you but I get a free supply of French pussy later anyway so whatevskies.

PERFECT response, take notes autists.

POLITE

CLASSY

>youtube.com/watch?v=_FWVKEtryvw
why can't murricans handle the bantz

>Oh so there ARE things in this world you wouldn't fuck.

Yeah I'm sure it feels great to know that maybe you'd have a chance in make believe

I love these threads

...

>take notes autists.

Actually I like that response because you wont be called a sexist and you keep it very basic. However it's not as funny.

"Wow, have you been taking meanie pills again? Haha"*winks*

He has class.

>The funniest part of your joke is thinking I'd go into that room with you in the first place.

She's hot. She's French. She hates fat talentless kikes and transgender freaks. Sounds like my kind of gal.

>only to have French slut come back with a perfect reversal on your retort which tops you in every way

>implying

this is it desu

She's the best.

boooooooo

>>implying
this is a male v female thing, not a french v kike thing

its about women forgetting their place

...

"What a forward young woman you are!"

>it's Cred Forums still can't get recovered and get proper comeback thread
Guys, can you just stop? That's just pathetic.

>its about women forgetting their place
kek....she triggered every fat manboy BADLY

>Womans doesn't even have sence of humor, how the fuck could he lost conversation to woman?
nigga do you even english?

Superior patrician cuck retort.

If you got beaten by women, that means you're pathetic cuck and deserved to be bullied

>Uh, I wow. You know I was on the fence about it but now I'm convinced it must be genetic.
>Frenchie: what eez geneteec monsieur Heel?
>Your taste in men. I'm assuming your grandmother said something similar while "entertaining" the Wehrmacht in '41.

"I'm a big guy. For you."

apparently even the french neckbeards are triggered.

>shit Cred Forums says

Why wouldn't you want to watch? It's porn except you can look at it from any angle, and you get to deeply inhale the smells

Do those parties really happen?

"Honest question, why?"
With a very serious puzzled look.

No, I'm just sitting here, enjoying to look at ass-blasted fat usa neckbeards. If man got recked by woman, he deserve all the mockery.

>[ironic laughter] HA! Hahaha
>[under my breathe but loud enough for le mics to pick up] You fucking cunt.

I think it would work. Just self depreciating enough.

>Well I mean Brad's going through a pretty rough divorce right now and I dunno if he'd really be up for coming to France for a sexual encounter with you and honestly he doesn't seem like the type of guy who would be into threesomes, let alone with someone he really doesn't know or is friends with. He's probably really stressed right now. Leo might be up for it but he's already got a lot of models and stuff and he really likes the menage to be more him and two ladies. Honestly your whole idea here seems a bit unrealistic which I guess is why it's just a fantasy. I mean I'm gonna go home and fantasize about you while I'm jerking off tonight so we all have our little things we can imagine to get us through a day I guess. i'll tell Brad you were thinking of him though, it might cheer him up to know he's still really wanted on the market y'know? Leo probably wouldn't care though honestly but I'll tell him you're interested anyway I mean you never know. Everyone likes to be appreciated though.

Noice!

ahahah those fucking wrists

>Yea w-whatever, subway is only open for a few more minutes anyway

Grow up.

>the fatty says while dying inside

I would just say something to the gist of "thats unfortunate for someone who likes you then, since you know that will never happen."

>Wow. I, uhm... I've struggled throughout my life with my weight. It's been difficult doing so in the public eye especially. I struggle with body image issues, depression, and I just...Look, i'm here to promote a film, I dunno why...[fights back tears] I don't know why you'd say such a thing, frankly.

>historical references

I like it!

So you're obsessed with America is what you're saying

>Americans have taste/class

you solved this puzzle
meme over

Why? It's a playful joke and shows that I'm not hurt by what she says, even a little flirty.

he is america

Then I'd add that " I heard jarred fogle is on the dating market... And you have the personality of his type."

I would have said

"That's funny, cause I'm fantasizing about leaving this show right now"

This is the saddest case of samefag ever

We may not have taste/class....but we do have SUBWAY'S® NEW Rotisserie-Style Chicken that is raised without antibiotics, following the brand's commitment to transition to only serve proteins raised without antibiotics. After months of working with supply chain and industry experts to meet the new demand, SUBWAY® is the largest global QSR restaurant chain to serve chicken that is raised without antibiotics at scale. The new Rotisserie-Style Chicken also features no artificial colors, flavors, or preservatives.

no hes a jew

Can someone explain the story/screencap?

I keep seeing this posted but never seen source.

"I'm sorry but none of us are interested in bestiality, frogs are only for the alt-right movement"

"I hope your fantasy includes a face lift and makeover, otherwise I think Brad and Leo are coming with me."

>Get up, pulling out a knife.
>Behead her on live television.
>People screaming and running for the door.
>Jonah holds up the bitches head yelling "Allahu Akbar! The harlot insulted a man of Islam! The religion of peace!"
>All the French Frogs cease screaming and instead applaude the Muslim man who is kind enough to culturally enrich them.
>French reporter is labled national shame and a bigot.
>Hill is seen as a hero and a fine muslim man.

youtu.be/Y90cC4qPgq4

So, "departe" or whatever she says, does that actually translate to "Go away" as the CC says? Or is it "you leave?"

You had me till the very end

this actually has potential
>french cumdumpster tells her joke
>"heh... yeah... oh wait" *takes out cellphone*
>"yes? Oh, ok... It's the bitch store calling, they're running out of YOU!"
>whole theater explodes in reaction to these top-tier bantz
>french chick is so impressed that her panties are instantly soaked
>she begs Jonah to let her suck his dick right now in front of everybody
>"I shall now fulfill your sexual fantasy"
>Jonah proceeds to leave the room after doing a mike drop
>the whole tv studio turns into one huge "The Perfume"-tier orgy over the excitement generated by this discussion
>mass suicides in France after getting dissed so badly
>French president proclaims that they will surrender to america despite there not being a war because they literally can never recover
>mfw

>And you i heard you get sodomized on a regular basis, no?
>Everyone stops laughing
kek

Kek at The Hill's gold chain

>"I shall now fulfill your sexual fantasy"

Kino.

Why do people think a different "comeback" is necessary?
He doesn't have anything to prove.

>the religioin of peace !

...

"vous partez" means you leave

>I posted it again!!!

>waits for translation
>bemused gasp
>"you cheeky slut"
>laughs
>continues interview

Why are you fat men so triggered by a joke? Do you like Jonah Hill's """"acting"""" or something?

literally

>what the fuck did you just fucking say about me you little bitch?

then why you still butthurt about it

Some of us stand up for ourselves. Maybe its just the American way.

there are no good comebacks. the only acceptable response would be to commit sudoku then and there

The pretty French girl reminded them of their place in the food chain.

I don't think you get it, we revel in celebrities misfortune

We're just coming up with better bantz the hill could have said

Pretty much this.

*clapping*

Because its funny idiot. Pretending it was a huge life changing moment is part of the joke. In the grand scheme of things he could have simply stood up, done a pirouette, and sat back down, and nothing would have changed. Also its about figuring out the perfect response that will neutralize the insult while not killing the mood or coming off as intentionally cruel. Its social chess.

>pretty French girl

Oxymoron.

Whatever you need to tell yourself 2chinz.

french tv sounds like a blast

>remember that incredibly painful time in your family?

>hey, did you know you're a fat pretentious neckbeard no one would like to fuck

great light hearted tv guys, keep it up

>Jonah shows no reaction on his face as the audience burst in laughter after the french cunt just roasted him.
>All is well though, Jonah has an ace up his sleeve.
>He slowly grins as tbe French pigs stop laughing, they all must feel so smug now. It's undeserved.
>Jonah leans towards the mic, licking his lips as he gets ready to drop the bomb.
>Audience couldn't care less, the French have already one.
>Jonah now breaks the silence.
>"Hail... Hitler."
>The French suddenly scream bloody murder.
>Already they are trying to find anything that is white to wave in surrender.
>Women drop their panties and present themselves like they did for the germans 70 years ago.
>France surrenders to Jonah Hill and names him as their new King.
>King Hill first proclamation is to build a Subway in every home and for it's subs to be named a national delicacy.

when are we coming back Cred Forums, WHEN ARE WE COMING BACK ??? IT'S BEEN THREE MONTHS

>"DUDE JOKES ABOUT ME GETTING DOUBLE TEAMED IN A THREESOME LMAO" is literally her gimmick
This is 100% female ''''''''comedy'''''''', try to find a female stand up that doesn't do her act around 'muh vigina', SPOILERS: you are going to fail.

i think we should ask hiro to create new board for planning this further.
/sub/ will be a good one.

topkek....well done

that wasn't jokez neckbeard, that was ether

How about this one?

(Simply laughing along) "Haha, yeah, Brad and Leo sleeping with you? You're right that is fantasy, haha."

Or something like "I'll let them know, but don't expect a call anytime soon"

>(Simply laughing along) "Haha, yeah, Brad and Leo sleeping with you? You're right that is fantasy, haha."

Yeah, this is a safe, but sensible retort.

Haha thats cool, cuz the only roast beef i eat is Subways™ delicious footlong Roastie. I only eat fresh

So the fatboy got offended by non-sensical gibberish?

>if I leave they leave too babe. Its 3 for the price of me.
>proceeds to lactate from his male tits and golden showers the entire podium
>his new movie is a sucess and becomes named sir jonah hill the second by the french queen

>bump limit
>still no effective retort

you fucking autists...

*sigh* let's try again..

so i watched the clip and honestly he just seems like a cunt, brad pitt and leo are more handsome than everyone and it seems reasonable that she would rather sleep with them than jonah.

>Funny, I have the same fantasy except you're the one that leaves