Dreamworks

I'm sure nothing I contributed ended up in there. We wrote a bunch of scenes they kept not using because we were changing too much.

My hats off to anyone that can write a Dreamworks Animation film. They have a unique process.

First they storyboard the entire film. That is the first step. Not kidding. No writers, no script, just a story, and an entire film drawn on pieces of paper.

Then Katzenberg watches an animatic of the boards and says, surprisingly, "this needs a lot of work. You have a month."

Then they hire their first writer. And spend that month changing as much of the storyboards as they can, which is about 20 to 30 percent.

If the 30 percent change isn't the right kind of change, people get fired. Maybe the director, maybe the writer, maybe both.

Sometimes, only the writer gets fired and an additional director is hired to help out. It all depends on who is better - at pointing a finger with one hand while covering their own ass with the other.

I came in about four writers into the process. It's kind of hard to write a "better" scene than the last writer when the rules are that you can only change 30 percent of each scene or completely change 30 percent of the scenes, per Katzenberg screening. So, for instance, in this scene, the panda comes up a flight of stairs carrying a bucket of water, slips on a banana peel, says something to two geese and does an air guitar. The good news? There can be anything in the bucket. Your mission: make the movie better.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=OR_qeMlXfeg
uproxx.com/filmdrunk/community-creator-spielberg-is-a-moron/
cartoonbrew.com/ideas-commentary/chris-sanders-explained-problems-with-the-industry-in-1989-46614.html
youtu.be/zKMw2dIjyqc
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

It's harder than it sounds. Especially when the larger "bucket" that the movie is contained in cannot change: the fact that the story has to be about a panda who is informed he is the chosen one, destined to ...beat up... a guy who has escaped from prison and who is spending the entire movie walking to town, in order to...try to beat him up, because that's the prophecy. And I won't spoil the movie, but the bad guy doesn't win. Because he's not destined to. But just to make sure he doesn't win, and because there's 70 minutes of time to kill before he gets there on foot, the panda is trained in the martial arts. it's kind of like Karate Kid, but if Mister Miyogi had long ago banished the Kobras and was running the karate tournament.

That resonates, right? We've all been in that situation. Oh, yeah, but we weren't the "panda." We were the "bad" guys, walking from Nazareth to Jerusalem, hoping to help people, only to get nailed to a fucking cross by the "good" guys. For instance, I had this job once at Dreamworks Animation...

I tried to divide my time there between the tasks of writing 30 percent of scenes, being hazed by storyboard artists because I didn't know how to do 30 percent of my job, yet, and explaining to the producers that Messianic myths (like The Matrix, which seemed to have a slight impact on their story) usually resonate because in the beginning of the story, things are bad, not good, and the good guy is usually the one overcoming insurmoutable odds and attempting to reclaim something from systems that have the magical ability to beat the living shit out of them no mater what they do.

I said, could we please dedicate this month's 30 percent change to making the bad guy be the ruler of the town, and the prophecy is that this panda is supposed to dethrone him.

Well, the prison scene is already drawn. And Jeffrey really likes it.

All right, can we make it like Demolition Man or Austin Powers or Cat Ballou, have the bad guy break out and everyone's panicking and they go and get the guy that according to legend is the biggest bad ass, but he's out of shape, out of his element and kind of a dick.

Hmmm, okay, but in that case, why is he coming up a flight of stairs, and what's in the bucket?

I don't know. There's food in the bucket, because he loves food so much, and ...he keeps his food in the basement, and he's coming up to answer the door because the stork is knocking at it and beseeching him to be a hero.

Well, the stork never knocks on a door, though. And Jeffrey likes the stork not knocking on doors.

So we quit. Actually, I believe we were fired.

They do this cycle like 30 times and the end result is a movie created over three years by 7 terrified directors and 20 pissed off writers, none of whom get any back end because it's an "animated" film, therefore no matter how bad it is, it turns like an 8,000 percent profit, and they make another one and another one and another one until Katzenberg is finally dead at the age of 117 because he uses all the money he saves to rejuvinate his body with the blood of poor people who die at the age of 50 because their hearts got clogged while eating Lion King Meals.

This whining would hold water if only KFP wasn't as great as it is

what a fat fucking complainer.

I hope Dan an heros soon.

this, I'm so sick of hearing this guy's fucking bitching.

I get the uncanny feeling that at the foundation of this aggression is "god damn it, if I had that opportunity, I would have been so happy." I get it. That's why I said "hats off" to the people that can do it. Like I didn't want to enjoy it and do well at it? Like that wouldn't have made me happy? I took half a paycheck and left and it was already clear that Dreamworks Animation would never be hiring me again.
Whoever's heroic campaign this is, try to understand that I lost anything you could take from me a long time ago, and the people you're dirtying are the people whose side you're on. Everyone that liked this movie and everyone that worked on it. You're bumming them out. It's way more vile than my rant. You're everything you hate about me but less honest to boot.

I mean he has a point, the bad guy in Kungfu Panda did nothing wrong.

No but nice projection there. I find Dan pretentious and weak for all the bullshit creative rhetoric he barks into the ether. He's a shitty writer with a fat ass and alcoholism, he's gone further than anyone should logically be able to go. I'm glad his ex wife finally escaped his childish and destructive brooding.
I now double down of hoping you kill yourself Dan, you're no where near worth all the bullshit you spew.

Why is it that the only time I ever hear about this douche is when he decides it's time to complain again? He's been doing for how many fucking years now.

It is literally no surprise his wife left him, I can't imagine anyone staying around this faggot for very long.

And his only claim to fame was doing a mediocre comedy on nbc about a junior college.
Like 5 years show.
Such a stellar resume, mein gott.

I listen to your podcast and I know how you talk, Harmon. You're not fooling anyone. Also, please tell Jeff that we get it, he's a feminist, he's doesn't need to force it into every single conversation.

>ex wife

Has anyone seen that one time on his podcast(which I don't actually listen to, someone showed me a clip of it) where Dans fat friend is really high and lets slip that Dan has been doing speed and his wife gets super pissy?

this is why i hate this animations for childrens

>So, for instance, in this scene, the panda comes up a flight of stairs carrying a bucket of water, slips on a banana peel, says something to two geese and does an air guitar. The good news? There can be anything in the bucket. Your mission: make the movie better.

The bucket contains Mein Kampf and The Protocols of the Elders of Zion.

Small detail change, now the entire movie has just become a little more interesting.

STOP COMPLAINING WRITERS.

>Dan's fat friend

Do you mean Spencer, or was there a mirror onstage?

>was there a mirror on stage
kek. And yeah, Spencer. I've never seen him not playing tabletop games, is he as autistic as he looks?

Maybe, but nothing you say about Dreamworks is going to stop me from watching every How to Train Your Dragon movie put out, just to see Toothless.

No, he's actually a nice guy. You dick.

What's Schrab like in normal everyday life?

How am I being a dick? I just said he looks autistic from the 5 minute clip I've seen of him.

I'm pretty sure the guy actually makes autism jokes himself at various points.

Is the third KFP any good?
I was shocked by how good the first one was and the second is also solid.

Schrab Harmontown episodes = best episodes

as much as I enjoy Justin Roiland, after hearing that last ED-209 improv I NEED Rob and Dan to do a show together. Rob > Justin

Rick and Morty?

To add to this: identity politics episodes = worst episodes. I've heard no less than three different people on that show openly say they're voting for Hilary specifically because she's a woman (and this was the primaries, before she was the only opposition to trump) and everyone was scared to call them out of it. I'm left-wing myself, but I remember the days when that meant you were in favour of fairer wealth distribution, not this regressive bullshit which has hijacked the discourse.

Justin is always fucking wasted on Harmontown, I think he gets nervous on stage or something.
Although when he made everyone uncomfortable by talking about killing himself it was pretty funny.

Third one is so terrible. Not worth your time.

I give that one to Justin, since he's actually funny and not "ooooo life sucks then you die oooo I'm Dan Harmon, bloo bloo daddy issues"

>say they're voting for Hilary specifically because she's a woman (and this was the primaries, before she was the only opposition to trump) and everyone was scared to call them out of it.
I don't think any calling-out was necessary. Dan and everyone just reacted kind of unimpressed by that, but probably didn't want to get into a big political debate. It's not like a guest's opinion reflects those of the show's.

>Justin
>nervous

Nah, he just enjoys his alcohol.

This is now a Schrab thread

youtube.com/watch?v=OR_qeMlXfeg

pretty valid criticism DESU

Thank god for Schrab

>2:22
Why was that so hot

Eh, I disagree. They gave these people a platform, and by politely sitting by they legitimise their quite frankly dangerously regressive views. You don't need to verbally assault someone to disagree with them, but anyone could easily have politely explained why they don't share that stance. I'd be willing to bet that if someone had said "I'm voting for Bernie because he's a man", they'd have been spoken out against.

Dan come back, I have more shit to give you

This. I got here too late and didn't get chance to insult him

harmonquest totally revealed Harmon to be 'that guy'
>' i feel like...i haven't gone in a while."
>"i feel like..its my turn"
>"im going to run away, because character development"
>"i know i should swing my sword but i said i'd punch him so i punch him'

just useless.

no, I too have heard that he has stage fright problems which is why there are little to no Justin Harmontowns. It's a shame

He was never really here.

Dan I want to tell you how much Reddit & Memey sucks and how its awfulness is a direct reflection of your shortcomings.

You all hate him the same reason you hate Kevin Smith. He's you but he somehow broke free and became successful.

It's funny because Kung Fu Panda was better than anything he ever wrote.

Is there an opposite of forgiving? Because everything good he's done was anti-forgiven for Sausage Party.

>Although when he made everyone uncomfortable by talking about killing himself it was pretty funny.
what episode?

I think that'd be called spite.
Spites fine.

I suspect this to be bullshit, because it makes absolutely no sense from a business perspective.Why would you pay storyboard-makers more money than usual to devise a story, and then spend more money than usual getting more writers than usual to rewrite it more than usual?

No, I mean like, if you do something bad, it can be forgiven if you later do something good.

But if you do some good things, and then something atrocious, it almost invalidates the earlier good stuff?

condemnation? hmm. DAN HELP US OUT HERE.

I know it's you you gross fuck. Take a shower.

>That resonates, right? We've all been in that situation. Oh, yeah, but we weren't the "panda." We were the "bad" guys, walking from Nazareth to Jerusalem, hoping to help people, only to get nailed to a fucking cross by the "good" guys. For instance, I had this job once at Dreamworks Animation...

Well THAT went in a weird direction.

Kek. Remember when he whined to a 7 year old girl about how Steven Spielberg didn't know anything about film-making.

uproxx.com/filmdrunk/community-creator-spielberg-is-a-moron/

>"I think a good story, even if it is sad or scary while you’re watching it, should always make you a little less scared after you’ve seen it."
>"It makes me mad that it scared you, because I tried to tell them they were making a bad movie that was going to confuse and frighten smart children, instead of making children more brave, and they acted like I was stupid for being afraid that would happen."
But he's right

Monster House is far better than any of Harmon's work that he's actually proud of.

Is Jaws 4 the pinnacle of kino?

143 retardinol

Schrab episodes are only guaranteed great as long as there is no random extra guest. If they all know each other like the Derek Meers episode then it is great. If it's some shoehorned feral audio cross-promotional cunt then Rob never talks.

That is Schrab's penis with a duck tape fin around it fucking an orange.

cartoonbrew.com/ideas-commentary/chris-sanders-explained-problems-with-the-industry-in-1989-46614.html

>The writer likes airplanes; he saw one on TV once. He has actually never worked on one before, and couldn’t tell you for sure what makes one fly. But now he’s got the idea, and is hammering away at an incredible rate. . . . Without the visual engineer’s guidance, the writer is guaranteed of making the same mistake every time. He will make his airplane look like every one he’s seen before, and he will power it with a plot and dialogue engine, the biggest and heaviest he can find.

It was created for a Disney offsite. I wasn’t invited to the retreat, but anyone could write their thoughts down and submit them, and they would be copied and bound into a folder that would accompany the attendees. The hope being that all this stuff would be read carefully and thoughtfully and then discussed by the attendees at the retreat.

IS DIS PASTA?

...

...

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I know this board sometimes rants that movies come off a production line, but at Disney, it actually IS a production line. None of the Disney movies are movies by the director, except Spielberg I guess

...

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I wanted to submit some thoughts of my own, but from the size of some of the notes being submitted by my fellow artists, I thought it was unlikely anyone would really read all that material. We’re talking dozens if not hundreds of pages of thoughts/complaints/suggestions in that folder.

So I decided to submit mine in the form of this little picture book — so it might stand out. I’m not sure if it worked, but if someone found a copy of it twenty years later, at least one person must have read it.

...

The reason wild wild west has a giant spider in it is because the nick cage superman never got made and was suppose to have a giant spider in it.

Studio execs are crazy fucks. You think ben hur made financial sense?

...

Anyone who read the story would see that I wasn’t a proponent of the removal of writers from the development process. But I was focusing on the quantity of writers, the quality of the writers, and the unwillingness of writers to partner with the artists they worked so near. And, I would say, the artists they needed to make their material work. In feature animation a great deal of the finished film, if not the bulk of it, is written by the story crew. And I mean entire scenes, not the occasional gag that is transcribed back into a script. As head of story on Mulan, I received a writing credit for that very reason.

This is now a sock baby thread

youtu.be/zKMw2dIjyqc

The other thing I was concerned about was the ever-growing complexity of our films, and what I saw as an emerging pattern they were all cut from. A lot of our films fell into a well-worn groove. Different characters, but similar roles. It didn’t seem like we could get away with that forever. I felt we could be more inventive. I felt that a film with a smaller crew and lower budget could be successful.

While the story crew was debating how we would kill the villain at the end of Mulan, we began reflecting on how strange it was that we spent so much time trying to find fresh ways to kill characters in Disney films. In Mulan we (the story crew) came up with the idea that the villain could be blown to bits by fireworks, rather than falling to his death as was written in the script. A lot of those villains fall at the end of Disney films. Some get stabbed first, but a whole lot of them fall. There was almost always a death at the end of our movies. It was one of those patterns I worried about.