To your left, you see a spear

To your left, you see a spear.
To the north, down the tunnel, a troll.

What will you do traveller?

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Go left

back from whence I came

Aye give the troll the spear, he will be my friend

Did British tv actually have shows like this? I mean I assume it's parodying something.

Kill Jester

>go north
>undress self
>offer sex to troll

Based leftist

youtube.com/watch?v=eQ4vZeB_tKI

turn the weans against us

youtube.com/watch?v=ciIfcYwI6Ps

That's great.

These shows were brilliant when I was a kid

You cannae sex the troll!

youtube.com/watch?v=NUXuRKBsqm4

Punch Goblin

>Simon, sidestep to your left
>Right
>Oh yeah, er, right!

youtube.com/watch?v=4Ezrm-cnXnQ

Yer wife is a flewsy.
youtube.com/watch?v=Hd4rgyZzseY

I really hope Netflix picks up the Falconhoof series Limmy tried pitching to BBC

...

Drink Barry's Red Cola

kill jester

kill self

You cannot go to tis a dead end.

examine spear

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You pick up the spear.

After examining it, you realise it has the troll's name engraved on it.

The troll begins to chase you traveller, what will you do?

fucking intro kills me everytime

Put troll in bag.

Punch troll

Thorin sits down and starts singing about gold.

You cannot punch the troll traveller, it would kill you.

youtube.com/watch?v=QOZzFXolGJc

Whip out my dick

Punch troll hard

The item "Dick" cannot be found in your inventory

put spear up ass

must have lost it in your mom's

Only acceptable answer.

a dildo in thatcher's dead arse

It's my money, it's my game. Kill her.

JOMP THE CHASM

No ya didna-- you did not!

Put hole in troll

Go south.

Jump the chasm

Traveller, the chasm is too wide for mere mortals to jump.

I have the sandals!

clever boy

Turn the weans against me Falconhoof.

Fuck jester

You cannot fuck Jester, she's too ugly.

fuck jester

Aye but at whit cost?

Ok. You try to fuck Jester but yer cock will no get hard.

Fuck Jester.

AWW THAS PEH'EE

Drink Barry's Red Cola and then fuck jester

Jester starts sucking you off. You get a semi and then prematurely ejaculate. She asks her bull troll do the job for you, cuck traveller.

ok...

go whence i came

Put the bull troll in bag.

Bull troll turns you over and fucks your arse, traveller. He cums with the power of a thousand suns. Bull troll is love, bull troll is life.

NAW THATS FUCKIN PETTY MATE