What did Hermoine see in Ron?

He had a big girthy dick, and came loads that would put pornstars to shame.

youtube.com/watch?v=cGYHEBpX2xQ

Why was there shit in the first book where McGonagall was clearly into Dumbledore?

Wouldn't she have known he was a gay?
Don't women usually know? Especially if they've known a dude for like 100 years?

Didn't she want Harry&Hermione together? What the fuck happened to that?

She already admitted it was a mistake and that there's no way Hermione would have been satisfied with Ron.

Look at that stupid ging fucking face. You just know that he knows hes in one of the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises was good. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

Women are very attracted to gay men

Straight woman always seem to have a thing for gay guys. They like to collect them like accessories so they can talk about their gay friend and try to get them to touch their breasts and shit like one of the girls.

Not at first but a few years passed and seeing the dance between Harry and Hermione in the last movie she realized they were more compatible than Ron/Hermione.

I think she admitted that in some interview with Emma Watson. Watson even said Ron and Hermione would've need marriage counseling later on.

dual mating strategy breh
shes smashing dudes on the side

She caved into the criticism of harry potter being too predictable by actual scholars. This was her damage control and it back fired. She most likely does not regret it either as she has a habit of saying things to keep her self in the "lime light"

If it meant more publicity and brownie-points with the SJW crowd Rowling would tweet that the entire story was a dream sequence and that Harry was just some poor kid stuck in a home that didn't love him

She has no principle when it comes to her own story. Everything is up for grabs

She was right the first time. Hermione is nothing special. She obviously self-inserts as the character though and in her middle age she's decided that she deserves better than what she got.

those fucking bitches women are truly scum

Pureblood wizard genes to muddy up.

Can anyone become an animagus?
Or is it like a gene or something you have to have?

It didn't seem like Peter Pettigrew's former best friends knew he could turn into a rat, as it seemed like something Sirius Black and Remus Lupin only recently deduced during the Prisoner of Azkaban, so I would think Pettigrew learned it sometime after defecting to the Death Eaters.

For instance, if I was just a normal wizard, but I wanted to be an animagus, or perhaps even specifically a crocodile animagus, is that something I'd just need to practice, or would I be shit out of luck if I didn't have some innate animagus ability?

Harry at no point seemed able to become one, despite his father being one.

Most likely.

I remember Hermoine become a literal SJW for elf slaves. What does Ron do?

the answer is simple
1. its magic
2. its poorly written schlock

What they really meant was "I Joan Rowling/Emma Watson think I can do better than Ron Weasley, so this character identify with should too"

Love is irrational. Who are you to say that hermoine can't fall in love with whoever she falls in love with?

>Can anyone become an animagus?
Yes, it is possible to learn it. The Marauders were exceptionally talented because they were able to learn to do it while still students, but it's unlikely you could choose what form you take, like your patronus.
>It didn't seem like Peter Pettigrew's former best friends knew he could turn into a rat
They did know. That's why they called him Wormtail. They only put together how he survived during Harry's third year though.

In the books they state that all of Lupins friends taught themselves to be animagi so they could hang out with him on full moons.

So you could probably just practice at turning yourself into a crocodile until you get good at it. Not sure how you turn yourself back into a person without being able to hold a wand though

Because the author is hack.

He alternates between making fun of her initiative and trying to explain that house elves are born with a predisposition for wanting to serve humans.

How did James turn back into a person after being a deer? Or Sirius while he was a dog?

>That's why they called him Wormtail

Totally forgot about that.

When will she fuck off and wait for the Harry Potter reboots? I've seen fans of this franchise already getting sick of her.

Calm down there, Freud.

By the time ending was to be made, the CRAZY fat SJW tumblrinas had made TOO many fanfics, TOO many ships, the sheer bandwith which would shut down the entire internet down. How does one handle that kind of responsibility? You just throw in a cheap shot and hope it doesn't look TOO fucking cheesy. Don't look back, rake in the cash, and bail.

this one is still my favorite from her whole twitter shit a few years back. twitter was a mistake

Rowling is a coward. We all know that

>Ambitious women always want confident, successful men who can stay cool under pressure.
>tfw she's a lawyer from a rich family
>and you're an electrician

> MFW Ameritards dont understand allusions to classism & the United Kingdom

damn yo stupid son

Women are generally unaware that men don't actually give a fuck about their academic records or career prospects. The responsibility for financial stability is already presumed by both genders to be on our shoulders, so women are mainly for companionship and sex.

Probably never. She knows she got extremely lucky and will continue doing this shit until her kids sell of the rights.

The most popular pairing for Hermione is Dramione. It's the biggest of them all, the only ones that bitch were the Hermionefags. Rowling was even confused how that particular ship was popular.

Funny that she's the smartest academically and she wastes that talent on helping literal niggers who like to be house slaves.

Ambitious wopmen don't always want confident successful men though. The ones that do make up power couples, which is great, I guess.
Of the ambitious women I know, a lot tend to go for laid back men. The ones happy to take the supportive role and not feel intimidated by the woman's success. She can chill and switch off when around him, which is really important.

I feel it was a good pairing, with the exception that Ron's stubborn/bullheaded. Should've been more beta desu.

Oda?

Because women are idiots, especially young ones.
And the concept of "Draco" in the fanfiction community is almost disassociated from the concept of "Malfoy" in the books. They always call him Draco, while in the books he's almost exclusively referred to by Harry and others as Malfoy.

>Hermione should be with Harry

lolno. Hermione strives for excellence in everything shes does and demands to be the best at everything. There's no way she can compete with Harry and would live eternally in his shadow. She wouldn't be Hermione [Insert great thing here] she would be Hermione "Harry Potter's wife" no matter what she did with her life.

Is it really surprising that she would be with Ron? Another brave man but who isn't as great as herself, who also challenges her by not meekly going along with her every whim

Wouldn't mind choking on the gases of her Foggy Bottom.

you sick fiend

I can't help it
the *bRRAAP* memes
I'm too impressionable

it's this, zempie

Harry was the beta, be honest with yourselves

It was clear that he was written by a woman. Constantly on his period in book 5. Settled for the first woman he dated after she rode the dick carousel (including niggers). He had notions of revenge and torture towards truly evil characters, but lacked the conviction to ever do anything about it. Nigger couldn't even kill wizarding Oswald Mosley/Voldemort after he had killed his family, friends and acquaintances.

If you can't kill the most evil wizarding being since wizard Hitler, how in the world do you ever get put in a position like head of Wizard Law Enforcement or whatever desk job he got after his PTSD ravaged him.

the script

fucks bitches on the side

You have to remember that for all their potato famine background, the Weasley family was pulling snatch left and right

I think we've all seen this pasta by now, no need to post it

>just like me
Why would you include that, its fucking redundant

probably some sort of kike (grand) wizardry

author was just trying to be gimmicky. ginny had crush on harry but there's no organic development for harry's feelings towards ginny. main female character falling for secondary male character instead of main male character is just a gimmick to elicit oh-look-author-is-so-different.

dumbledore being gay is another gimmick. nothing in novels indicate that. author just said it so she can claim she wrote a gay character.

It makes sense when you realize she actually was supposed to look like this all along

Better "actress" than Emma Watsons thats for sure

>Ambitious women always want confident, successful men who can stay cool under pressure.
No. Get back to me when you are older.

/thread

Rowling is a dumb cunt

Crookshanks should have been an animagus. I bet you Hermione cuddled with him right after taking a shower and then he would lick her and rub all over her and she'd laugh and say "oh Crookshanks, you got me all dirty again!" and he would just purr but all this time that cat was a 40 year old ginger, probably Ron Weasley's estranged uncle that nobody in the family talks about.

Fanfic recommendations:

Worthy of Magic
fanfiction.net/s/11826429/1/Worthy-of-Magic

Peak *tips fedora* the fanfic

>fan shit
>>>/tumblr/
or
kill yourself.

damn I thought we were down for a moment, let's shitpost kids

>Ambitious women always want confident, successful men who can stay cool under pressure.

Wrong they always orbitate towards attractive losers that don't give a fuck about them. I've seen a literal engineer driving two hours to fuck a drug dealer.

They marry the ambitious beta though but that usually ends up poorly

You have autism.

I mean in for real, not just as a simple insult.

Why are roasties so dumb lads?
Nah they're just testing a new feature for the 4chen pass(being able to see which posts belong to whom on boards without ID/trips)

Does that mean if a cute girl gets a Cred Forums pass and likes my posts she will seek me out to have sex with me?

Because that'd be fucking neato

This. This is what Rowling was referring too when she said they would have never ended up together.

That alpha/beta shit is only in burgerstan, don't confuse it with longstanding British social stratification.

>Classism
>Princess Diana was about to marry a sand nigger

Remind me what year this is again in Bongistan, you limey fuck

Because, like the rest of the shit she came up with after the fact, she never actually intended for him to be gay
it was just left ambiguous and then she decided it based solely on how it made her fans think about her

Oh for fucks sake are you that stupid?

Because something exists doesn't mean every shittard in the system is doing it.

Yes, Diana was a case of an altruist within the remnants of the old aristocracy, but the majority of the upper class scoff at that shit.

>her

Just to be clear, Hermione becomes Minister For Magic in Cursed Child.

Ron runs a shop selling shitty novelty toys that his dead brother came up with.

I remember while reading the books that Hermione actually hooking up with Ron and then marrying him felt really incredulous to me.

>Hermione becomes Minister For Magic in Cursed Child

What the fugg?!

Daily reminder that this is the CANON Hermione and if you dont accept that youre just on the wrong side of history.

>Hermione transfigured herself into a black woman to further her career through exploiting affirmative action

Truly she is a genius

Cursed Child should have never happened. If this is surprising to you, I wonder how you'll react to the actual pants down retarded stuff.

Rowling was probably forced to sign off on that at gunpoint. No sane woman would let that besmirch her legacy.

Kek

She had low self esteem due to her childhood of frizzy hair and beaver teeth, that never went away

She clearly got off on the idea of Harry and Ron fighting each other for her. It just didn't happen that way when neither of them called her bluff, and by then Ron had pimped his scagbeast little sister into Harry's pants. Hermione figured it was either let Ron put his penis in her for the rest of their lives or die a mudblood spinster with a dusty uterus.

>Ambitious women always want confident, successful men who can stay cool under pressure.
Nigger, don't pretend to be an expert on women.

Props to Ron's actor, he makes Ron look so stupid and cuckolded in the movies, yet in interviews the guy is really cool. Lowkey the best actor in the series.

didn't see that titty shot coming, bravo!

I didn't read the new book but didn't Harry go on to be a bit of a nobody? Maybe Ron did better.

>What did Hermoine see in Ron?
What did Ron see in Hermione? According to the book, she's an unattractive, obnoxious know-it-all. The casting in the movie makes the pairing a bit weird but honestly they're probably supposed to be within each others' league.

Rowling is a fucking hack anyways and can't write to save her life.

Was he the ultimate robot Cred Forums? Because it's either him or Snape.

I never read that sub-text in the actual novels. Or have you been reading fanfiction.

>Ginny and Cho supposed to be literal 10/10s
>cast 4/10 bongs instead

That's a hard one

>one lives his life as rat both literally and figuratively. also a fatass but isn't a virgin since most likely had rat sex
>one live his life as a wizard both literally and sexually. not only that but also got cucked so hard, he got killed protecting his bully's wife's son

In the books Hermione and Ron have a lot more sexual tension and it's alluded they have a thing for each other whereas Harry couldn't give a fuck about anything other than his parents.
I think Harry ending up with Ginny is way more absurd than Ron and Hermione.
Harry should've ran through the quidditch team,
Katie Bell, Alicia Spinnet, Angelina Johnson and Oliver Wood were all prime pussy.

Does this mean that if I were to meet amber heard she could fall in love with me?

>he doesn't know about post-structuralism
laughing derrida.jpg

>Why was there shit in the first book where McGonagall was clearly into Dumbledore?

There was? I don't remember a single line that gave off that impression.

>dont care about self motivation and success

yea because I want kids to have the merits of an underperforming partner

you are the definition of a loser

>Ambitious women always want confident, successful men who can stay cool under pressure.
wut? Ambitious women want a yes, man. There can't be 2 leaders in a relationship

god that shitfest was like Shrek Forever After with homo subtext

desu

>death of the author

that had better be a joke

Becoming an animagus an extremely difficult process, it's like brewing one of those difficult potions only you're doing it in your body. One of the steps, for example, is holding a mandrake leaf in your mouth for a whole month.

I guess if you fuck it up it could have disastrous results. That combined with the fact that becoming an animal is not all that useful when you can do magic (including transmorfication or whatever the fuck it's called, to give yourself animal parts you might find useful) makes most people not bother with it I guess.

The real question is how the fuck did the come up with the marauders map. It can even see under Harry's broken ass invisibility cloak.

This. Watson makes everyone forget that hermione was supposed to be ugly. and desu she was actually a pretty ugly kid, just ended up being a babe

Apparently she also thought it was a mistake to not make Hermoine a black transgender man-woman.

>Why X did X and X not X in Harry Potter
Bad children's movie written by a woman.

That's the daughter of two dentists?

She's black so she went for the small ginger cock.

Can you guys please explain to me why anyone over the age of 14 would watch these movies?

They are British dentists

this desu

>If you can't kill the most evil wizarding being since wizard Hitler

He did though? He got rid of the soul jars and then he knew all he had to do was get Voldemort to send a killing curse his way and it would bounce since the wand was his.

>dumbledore being gay is another gimmick. nothing in novels indicate that

I remember thinking the whole Albus/Gellert thing was pretty damn gay when I was reading that part of the book.

Yeah that bit didn't surprise me.

I think it's got to do with the chemical response they got out of us when we were that age or less. It creates a peculiarly intense loyalty.

Magic is cool at any age, but the story really is lacking in too many departments to make these enjoyable.

why do i hate harry potter with every fiber of my being, Cred Forums?

you perv ! She was underage back then