BOOOOOOOOOOONSOIR BONSOIR BONSOIR BONSOIR BONSOIR BONSOIR BONSOIR BONSOIR BONSOIR BONSOIR BONNNNSOIRRRRR

Yep, and I wonder if anything will happen to the ratings after that.

Is this real

>set up the "Women's Equality Party"
>joked about Farage's testicular cancer at a fund-raiser while she was leader of a political party
>dude I'm just a comedian lmao

Fuck Toksvig

He and Sam Raimi are very good friends, let's just leave it at that

I don't know, she seems like a decent fit, she was always pretty good when on the show. She's not that funny but she does know a lot.

You don't have to know anything to present the show, Stephen Fry is a pseudo-intellectual

He knows a lot of trivia factoids, which is exactly the right kind of thing to know for this kind of show.

>implying the production crew don't feed him the trivia before the show

OFFICIAL QI GUEST STAR POWER RANKING

>GOD TIER
>Bill Bailey
>David Mitchell
>Rob Brydon
>Sean Lock

>GOOD TIER
>Jimmy Carr
>Ross Noble
>Dara O Briain
>Rich Hall
>Alan Davies

>QUITE INTERESTING TIER (Guests who actually tried to answer the questions)
>Jeremy Clarkson
>Daniel Radcliffe
>Clive Anderson
>David Tennant

>DECENT TIER
>Phil Jupiter
>Sue Perkins
>Sandi Toksvig
>Andy Hamilton

>SHIT TIER
>Jo Brand
>Johnny Vegas
>Ventriloquist Lady

Stephen 'I make twinks cry' Fry is surely involved in some shady shit.

>Phil Jupiter

Where's Lee Mack?

has he even ever been on QI?

...

Many times.

He is pretty fucking gay, at least 90:10 gay to straight

...

I have the same boxers as that bum bandit, how should I kill myself?

>Ventriloquist Lady

She's so shit

>Rich Hall
>good tier

Name literally one funny thing he ever said.

Next series start in a week. Really hope there's some chemistry between Toksvig and Alan. I'll give the show a chance but I'm afraid it just won't be the same without Stephen Fry.

updated list

OFFICIAL QI GUEST STAR POWER RANKING

>GOD TIER
>Bill Bailey
>David Mitchell
>Rob Brydon
>Sean Lock

>GOOD TIER
>Jimmy Carr
>Ross Noble
>Dara O Briain
>Rich Hall
>Alan Davies
>Lee Mack

>QUITE INTERESTING TIER (Guests who actually tried to answer the questions)
>Jeremy Clarkson
>Daniel Radcliffe
>Clive Anderson
>David Tennant

>DECENT TIER
>Phil Jupitus
>Sue Perkins
>Sandi Toksvig
>Andy Hamilton

>SHIT TIER
>Jo Brand
>Johnny Vegas
>Ventriloquist Lady

I want to be Stephen's fucktoy. I'm not even joking. I want his sweaty body to dominate me as he calls me "his property".

Jimmy Savile 2.0

>La, la la la la la, la la la la la, la la la la la

>Well the years went by and I met a new guy
>And all he wanted to do was play with my brown-eye
>Then I remembered my old mate Stephen fry
>Who said “hey Elliot you shouldn’t give it a try
>We don't even do anal anyway
>That’s only what those homophobes say,
>All you need is a bottle of lube
>Just part your thighs and then I’ll show you why"

>La, la la la la la, la la la la la, la la la la la

youtube.com/watch?v=pa5STn_9aWo
Oh no no no no no

Stephen Fry Has never had Anal sex!
Stephen Fry Has never had Anal sex!
Stephen Fry Has never had Anal sex!

don't they do that for all french films?

I like vegas, but never saw QI why he shit

>SHIT TIER
>Johnny Vegas

The whole list is void due to this shit opinion.

>DUDE I SWEAR A LOT AND ACT LIKE A LITERAL RETARD I'M FUNNY LMAO
>"""comedy"""

So he's a fat "God tier" Sean Lock then.

youtube.com/watch?v=-I3qREbKqLw
well, you forgot him

his tom cruise things pretty funny

I was actually pretty impressed with Dan Radcliffe. Intelligent fellow.

Where would you rank Jimmy Carr's laugh?

Also, Ive got to see a Clive Andersen one now

He's a many if many different capabilities and he's quite functional.

He did a memorable guest hosting on HIGNFY, good lad.

would you say he's a Swiss Army Man™?

On QI, I'm not lowering myself to watch stand-up """comedy""".

I say, chap, that's quite the ribald turn, eh, wot?

yeah he's not smart like people on Cred Forums
sure he went to cambridge but how many vsauce videos has he watched? not many.

So QI ended, right?

Nobody is watching with a new host.

is he the British gay Anthony Cumia?

Stephen Fry is a 100% confirmed paedophile. He was looked into as part of the investigation around the BBC paedophile ring but he was at the time (and still to this day) seen as "too big to prosecute". They also didn't want to be seen as "homophobe" by going after him but those in the know, know.

He is a disgusting pervert who should be hanged by the neck until death.

But Sean Lock is actually funny

eh heh hehehe...reow!

Knighthood when?

I think she'll do a good job if she avoids her batshit-crazy feminist theories. Fry's schoolboy obsession with smut was becoming tiriesome.

Phil should be in god tier imo, also joe brand should be in at least decent tier. Toksfig, Anderson and Hamilton should have their own tier between good and QI called radio 4. Also alan shouldn't be on the list at all, that's like putting Fry on the list.

I don't know why but he gives a strong bottom vibe despite his size and stature.

>Stephen Fry Has never had Anal sex!
He went to an all male boarding school in the 60s. We can't be absolutely certain, but we can be very sure that at some point he got buggered in the dorms.

Can't stand Sean Lock, his "I'm pwopa fick me" schtick gets old very quickly.

user, I.....

Jupitus is just a male Jo Brand, pair of mopey cunts with no sense of wit. Fair play on Radio 4 tier though.

>degree in English Literature

>ross noble
>good tier
Second only to bill bailey

Too inconsistent and slightly overbearing manner; I like him but he's no Bailey.

Okay made me kek

Of course not you retard

the term is dry, but I wouldn't expect a yank to understand

Fuck off you southern poof, he's a miserable twat and his humour is just as gormless as Alan Davies.

>shit tier
>vegas

get the fuck out of here.

I honestly like the guy but sometimes I wonder if I'm supposed to laugh at him or feel sorry for him. Also I'm pretty damn sure he drinks heavily before doing any show.
You should see the time he hosted Buzzcocks, it was ridiculous, but very funny.

>gormless as Alan Davies.
Now thats just too far.

Vegas is an acquired taste, I couldn't stand him the first time I saw episodes where he was on but after rewatching them a couple of times I've grown to like his persona and humor. If you watch closely any time he says something funny Alan and most of the other guests are almost pissing themselves laughing. Even Sean Lock loses it when Vegas is on and he generally keeps a straight face.

>alright son lets go the store
>il let you pick out a candy while shopping
>but daaaaaaad, i want two
how has no one else said something along those lines

Nick Clegg has the worst speaking manner I've ever heard, I literally feel sick hearing him talk.

What?

bonsoir
youtube.com/watch?v=THsrRTsqZ6Q

HIGNFY is on. Sorry, I thought this was the panel show general.

Gogglebox is on lad

yea well you better be sorry

y-you too

pleb

A comedians comedian.

a not lowest common denominator comedian.

he's one of the best on the show, as previous user said he gets others crying when they'd usually be set with one liners to join in.

johnny vegas is a great character.

Wilty>QI>8oo10c>HIGNFY>Buzzcocks>Mock The Week>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Cats does Countdown

Mock the Week was god tier when Frankie Boyle was on. Should've been axed the moment he left

>It's a Rory McGrath doing periodic table wheelies episode

Sandi Toksvig has three joke formats
>I'm a dyke
>I lived in America
>I'm Danish

Fucking KEKKLE

It does get old a bit, I agree. But she's still intelligent and witty and honestly I'm sad to see Stephen go but I couldn't think of anyone better to replace him so I'll give her a chance.

I really enjoy Cats Does Countdown but I realised recently it's because of Sean Lock. Jon Richardson can't fuck off far enough.

Still better than this fucker. He's not been on QI but still. Every. Single. One of his jokes or comments on any comedy show are about his hands.
Listen, I get that your disability is a big part of your life but why can't you be a comedian in your own right? Why do people like this have to revolve their entire comedic career on their abnormalities? It's like those female comedians who ONLY talk about being a woman. I know you can be funny, I've seen it, so why not just do comedy about literally anything else than your gender/race/disability?

>le self-deprecating cripple man

He's even worse than all the women that just rely on 'muh vagina' gags

Alex Brooker, Josh Widdicombe, Jon Richardson, Rob Beckett, that Nish faggot, Adam Hills and Josie Long should take a road trip together and never come back

I'd bet money on Stephen dipping his french fry into kids.

He's a slimy looking nonce.

Sean Lock is the saving grace of that show. He is a godlike comedian. Though I just wish they would bring back regular Cats. The countdown format is wearing very, very thin by this point. And the little stunts Jimmy does during the 30 second countdown are completely cringeworthy. I feel insulted as a viewer, it's like they think people will switch off because there's 30 seconds of people trying to make up words so they have a fake Jimmy breakdance on the studio floor or have Jimmy do something ridiculous like making a paper-mache hat or something. It's all getting very old.

Is Nish that guy who just shouts "racist!" at every vague mention of colour? I remember him on a show and someone said something like "It's not all black and white" while referring to something and he just shouted "That's racist!". It's like he's conditioned. Someone says the word black and he says racist. No joke. No humour. No comedy at all. Just a conditioned response.

I actually quite like Jon Richardson.

I'm not so sure, I like playing along since I'm a fan of regular Countdown.

I bet everyone applauded too. Like the dogs they are.

Really gets on me nerves. I don't think I've ever seen him make a joke that wasn't about his disability. How annoying that must be for actual comedians with talent or who put hard work into their comedy when this cunt can just say "lol my hands" and get a sympathy laugh.

I think we need an "official" British comedian power ranking
Anyone want to make one and then we shout at you for getting it wrong until we agree on it?

I just miss the banter from Cats. Cats Does Countdown has banter, but it's interrupted by the game. I like playing along as well but it's just a weird combination and I really miss regular Cats. Sean had a lot more time to shine in that. Now all he can do is his mascot bit at the start and then they just play the game. Granted, those bits are fantastic, but he doesn't get to do much other than lose the game after that.

Also, who the FUCK was that moron with the fake teeth and weird wig in Dictionary Corner last week? Most embarrassing thing I've ever seen.

Put Rich in Decent and get Johnny out of Jo and Ventriloquist lady tier and that list is correct.

Don't talk about Susie like that

Thing is, everyone's taste is different and the format some comedians excel in is different.

I would put forward David Mitchell as I think his sketch shows with Robert Webb are fantastic and Mitchell is a perfect for panel shows as well. But Webb is terrible at them. Webb is a very funny comedian, but a terrible panel show guest. And then Mitchell is terrible at stand-up.

I think all-round, Bill Bailey is one of the best. Amazing stand-up (saw him live twice, he's phenomenal), one of the only comedians I know who combines stand-up with live music without it feeling forced or shit. He's also one of the best panel show guests on anything he's in and he's also good in sitcoms (Black Books)

Bailey is objectively god-tier

I'd never talk about Susie like that. Susie is for tender missionary sex and occasionally whispering naughty words in her ear during the act and seeing her blush.

Haven't seen the new ones yet, my TV became my monitor a couple of years ago. Guessing they're on 4od, will have a look later

Where would Stew be on that list?

Near the top, I reckon, but he's definitely an acquired taste

They're on youtube as well, worth a watch. There's a lot of guest team captain shit going on though. I love the show when it's Sean and Jon.

Also, don't bring Stew into this.

I want to make sweet love to her but I didn't like her jokes

Bill Bailey is all-round one of the best comedians in the country, without a doubt.
So is David Mitchell.
Sean Lock is really underappreciated. I think he's terrific at his job and he never fails to make me laugh. I'm in stitches on my sofa watching him even when the audience doesn't really "get" him.

Also you can't mention Sean Lock without showing this, one of my all-time favourite Sean moments:
youtube.com/watch?v=TfFSxyrCnLk
Starts at 1:00

Was Jack the one who got the questions beforehand? When he answers correctly it almost feels like he's reading them straight from a textbook and Fry never seems to give a shit and just goes "Yeah yeah but also..." and moves on.

Nah, if the rumour about one of the guests getting questions beforehand is true it's Jimmy Carr.
Either that or that pompous, unfunny git John Sessions. That man seems to forget it's a comedy panel show and not a "buzz in and drop all the knowledge you have in a monotonous tone" game to show off your knowledge.

Alan confirmed that they all get the questions (or at least a broad idea of the subjects that will be coming up) beforehand so they can prepare funny material for the recording. Now, some guests use that information to create material while certain others use it to research the questions in order to come across as more intelligent than they really are.

>it's a "stephen slags off contestants even though their answer was right "episode
>It's a "stephen tries to show off his knowledge and makes a fool of himself" episode

Love the man but he really isn't an authority on foreign languages and should notact like he is

I thought Alan said they all get the questions some hours before the recording starts, but one of the guests apparently got the questions well in advance.

It's a Stephen read obscure trivia he obviously doesn't know off a card but still acts like a condescending asshole to Alan

I doubt it's Sessions, to be honest. He demonstrates that he knows an ungodly amount of useless information on any show he's on, so I thinks it's quite likely he knows these things without needing the questions in advance. Gyles Brandreth and to a lesser extent Rory McGrath similarly know shitloads of stuff that is completely unimportant.

I love Fry but one episode he really got on my nerves. He has an argument with Jo Brand on how to pronounce the German word for boat, "boot". Jo Brand actually pronounces it perfectly but Fry puts her down saying she's simply wrong.

She makes jokes? I only sort of stare at her beautiful botoxed face and her armpits and touch myself.

I prefer regular 8 out of 10 Cats but Cats Does Countdown at least has the ridiculously sexy Rachel Riley and the beautiful Susie Dent to fawn over

>not enjoying CdC for the countdown and Rachel

plebs

I haven't seen the last few ones, does Joe still come on? Call me a retard but I love that retard.

Susie and Rachel are the only reason the show is still going and hasn't moved to a new format. They should just give them a morning show or something, I bet they'd actually have some pretty good chemistry

don't understand this shit. i like sex more than the next guy and looking at tits but if you watch something for that and it's not porn then ur a moron or 65+ years old and only own a 2005 flip phone

I don't think he's been on this series as an intermezzo. He was a guest captain in one of the new episodes though.

It's called "something for the dads". It's like how they always have two or three fit girls on Strictly. Something to keep the "dads" interested in watching.
Sometimes it's just nice to see some good-looking women man. They don't have to be naked and sucking cock. I hate to generalize but I think it's an age thing. I would've agreed with you back when I was 18 but I'm 24 now and I just like seeing a good-looking woman on the telly.

No, Stephen was right. Jo was pronouncing it like the English word boot.

No she wasn't. Jesus, I'm fucking German.
Jo didn't say boot as in the footwear, she said it exactly as we say it.

But you only learned German this year, Muhammad.

he also wrote a play about it
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Latin!_or_Tobacco_and_Boys
>Latin! or Tobacco and Boys is a play by Stephen Fry, written in 1979. It was first performed at 'The Playroom', an L-shaped space in St Edwards Passage that belonged to Corpus Christi College, Cambridge.[1] It is about life at the fictional Chartham Park Preparatory School For Boys, a prep school in England, and ends up in Morocco, via a homosexual relationship between a teacher and a 13-year-old student.
>The title derives from Christopher Marlowe's reported comment that "All they that love not Tobacco and Boys are fools".

In which colony is this school located?

London mate

Better list.

Elder God Tier
>Bill Bailey
>David Mitchell
>Rich Hall
>Sean Lock

Blue Whale Tier
>Alan Davies

High Tier
>Andy Hamilton
>Jeremy Clarkson
>Jimmy Carr
>Rob Brydon
>Sue Perkins

Good Tier
>Clive Anderson
>Danny Baker
>Dara Ó Briain
>Jack Dee
>Phil Jupitus

POWER GAP

Meh Tier
>Jason Manford
>John Sessions
>Josh Widdicombe
>Sandi Toksvig

Bad Tier
>Johnny Vegas
>Ronni Ancona
>Ross Noble
>Sarah Millican

Muh Husband Tier
>Jo Brand

Rich Hall just keeps getting funnier and funnier!

Actually consider Rich moved down to High Tier. It was an older list.

Ross Noble's better than that. He riffed off Brian Cox excellently in that one episode.
Also Jack Dee is responsible for the single best moment in QI history:
youtube.com/watch?v=-I3qREbKqLw
He also had the best moment in WILTY history last year:
youtube.com/watch?v=DU390JYhD5o

High Tear at the very lowest
Also Rich Hall is great, but not Elder God. Kinda miss him, hasn't been on in years

I spent the longest time thinking that Fry and James May were the same person, so every time I'd watch top gear I'd think, "wow, James doesn't seem that gay to me."

You guys seem to like making Fry look like a nonce but what about Graham Norton? No boyfriend or husband, been single for decades, and lives alone. Yet I never hear rumours about him.

Ok, completely leaving comedic talent aside, let's make a list of fuckable female comedians.

GOD TIER
Katherine Ryan
Ronni Ancona

HIGH TIER
Sara Pascoe
Isy Suttie
Catherine Tate

GILF TIER
Jennifer Saunders

NEEDS THE FEMINISM FUCKED OUT OF HER TIER
Josie Long

DISGUSTING TIER
Sarah Millican
Jo Brand

Add that irish female comedian that comes on QI sometime, she's a QT.

How could I forget the adorable Aisling Bea. High Tier for sure.

ELDER GODDESS TIER
Emma Thompson

funny too

I like Suttie but she can't compare to Pascoe and Tate.

Also put potato in god tier.

Guilty shag: Miranda Hart

Suttie is the weird, dorky crush
Pascoe is all-round very beautiful
Tate is a ginger milf who's bound to be insane in bed

C'mon Cred Forums let's not say we haven't all fantasized about playing with those Millicans

please dont ever post again

no u

Best QI moment coming through youtube.com/watch?v=GdvD4Fhc_K8

Either that or Jack Dee's zinger or the whole Leonarda Da Vinci looking like Brian Blessed shtick

He is on the show, but he's absolutely terrible on stage. No idea why that is.

I can't stand Sara Pascoe.

He did ask to completely leave comedic talent aside.