So I'm supposed to like this slut? She's probably the worst human being on earth, what the fuck?

So I'm supposed to like this slut? She's probably the worst human being on earth, what the fuck?

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I did not know anything going into this movie, I thought it was going to be a neat, little film about a girl trying to change her surroundings and herself for the better. Of course it's gonna be a tedious romance. That happened to overly pretentious with its comedy.

The only interesting thing about the film was that mildly stupid boy who sold vegetables. I only knew him from "Asterix and Obelix in Egypt", and there he had only one arm.
The thing is, I never really seen him with two arms, and then made up a story about how he's probably some one-armed comedian always telling jokes that end with the "i only got one arm" punchline, which is why he's popular in France and how he got that job in that comedy.
I was kind of struggling to figure out if he really did have only one arm which kept me to keep watching the movie. The biggest emotional relief I felt in a long time when I saw the boy embracing himself in a hug with another man, as I looked on. He truly did have two arms

...

Reminder that the Left furiously denounces this movie as racist and problematic because there are no black or muslim characters.

But she's soooo quirky and cute, plus she's French!

...

>you will never visit Amelie's Paris.
>you will never visit a French Paris

At least you've been to Texas

In fairness the french are the loosest people on earth. The whole notion that it's looked down on to have sex all the time confuses them. It's why the british don't like them.

Go back to r-ddit.

t. bitter virgin

I wish Emily Watson play Amelie instead of Audrey Tautou

tfw no gf to cuddle in bed with at this moment

> I want an even less threateningly female actress

Americans like you are so retarded holy shit.

Swedes like you are so cucked holy shit.

watson was the first choice of the director.this flick is literally wrote for her but she cant take this part cuz her mom died though

this is an objectively bad film

Yeah and the director was a white knight numale with a testosterone count in the red. Of course he'd never write a film about an actually hot, curvy girl who only he gets to ravage. The sequel will probably just be jared leto as the love interest in drag getting railed by idris elba as the director sits in the corner apologizing.

Fitgirl makes the best repacks.

It's an absurdly retarded movie.
But my wife adores it, she made me even watch it with her.

I think that's the quintessential movie that only women can understand or like.

He has both arms but one isn't working so it's always in his pocket. He never make jokes about it but he's not overly sensitive either. He lost the use of his arm when he was 14 and a delinquant, he was doing some illegal stuff on a train road, his best friend died and he ended up like this.

Since then, he turned his life around and became one of the first famous french people coming from ultra poor immigration. He's actually quite funny and created a theater for new comedians who don't have connections. He's also a good actor at times.

If you want to see him more, you can watch Indigenes, about colonial soldiers during WW2.

They didn't ? Amelie Poulain was like by pretty much everyone when it came out.

The music makes most of the movie, based Yann Tiersen.

This thread is full of Cred Forums and plebs m8

> plebs

*tips

*teleports behind you*
not so tough now are ya kid

Im in a gay relationship so you'd have to watch your timing because otherwise you'd just teleport between me and an incoming dick.

nothing wrong with ONS. women love them and men love to please women.

wtf i love this movie now?

It was quirky enjoyable.
This is better.
youtube.com/watch?v=23XLXZg897Y

If like things like amelie then for peak enjoyment take your gf to a club, get her drunk and then watch her take dicks professionally in the toilets. It's the ultimate numale thrill.

Stop projecting.
Do you need a hug?

oh wow.. its so small

*winks scandalously*

jk user.. but you know.. i thought you might have made this a little more... challenging...

*smirks underneath straw hat while flicking my twin katanas from their sheathes with my thumbs*

HAHA. didn't expect a fight did you?

*strafes from side to side while sword dancing* (then suddenly) *thrusts both blades into your abdomen*

heh. now for the FUN part.....

*lifts you over head by my blades and smashes you head first into the dirt*

*slickly sheathes katanas while adjusting the wheat grass in my mouth*

*sigh* too easy...

Only if you're personally offering big boy x

Yeah, Paris doesn't look like that anymore sadly.

*boyfriend sodomizes you*

French fag here. Even we admit this film is garbage.

This movie has gotten me laid twice, i will forever be in it's debt.

oh we have a tough guy here huh......

*unsheathes my twin katanas again*

well let's see how tough you really are!

*jumps into the air*

TAAAAKE THIIIIIIIIIIIS

*spins around and slashes your face open*

not so tough now huh??????

*grabs you and throws you up*

its time to finish this little charade

*holds my katanas above my head*

YOU ARE FINIIIIIIISHEEEEEEEEED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*jumps upwards so that you get impaled on my swords*

heh....... easy.......

*slow claps*
*steps out of the shadows*
Heh... not bad, kid. Not bad at all. Your meme, I mean. It's not bad. A good first attempt. It's plenty dank... I can tell it's got some thought behind it... solid quotable material...
But memeing isn't all sunshine and rainbows, kid. You're skilled... that much I can tell. But do you have what it takes to be a Memester? To join those esteemed meme ranks? To call yourself a member of the Ruseman's Corps? Memeing takes talent, that much is true. But more than that it takes heart. The world-class Memesters - I mean the big guys, like Johnny Hammersticks and Billy Kuahana - they're out there day and night, burning the midnight meme-oil, working tirelessly to craft that next big meme.
And you know what, kid? 99 times out of a hundred, that new meme fails. Someone dismisses it as bait, or says it's "tryhard," or ignores it as they copy/paste the latest shitpost copypasta dreamt up by those sorry excuses for cut-rate memers over at reddit. The Meme Game is rough, kid, and I don't just mean the one you just lost :^). It's a rough business, and for every artisan meme you craft in your meme bakery, some cocksucker at 9gag has a picture of a duck or some shit that a million different Johnny No-Names will attach a milion different captions to. Chin up, kid. Don't get all mopey on me. You've got skill. You've got talent. You just need to show your drive.
See you on the boards...

Starship Troopers got me laid 3 times, so one up on you.

Feuque offe plize, Jeunet is based.

It still exists, only obviously not in Montmartre.

Hi Paul, I'm Blart

>anymore
how about never ?

> Visit France
> "Hey you waaan buy cigarettes"
> Gypsies everywhere with signs about their fabricated sob story
> "Bonjour bonjour mini eiffel?"
> Call to prayer

*You turn only to see log dressed in pajamas laying on ground.*

*Suddenly, you are inside swirling ring of darkness. But it is actually my shadow clones.*

Kage no shadow. Have you heard of this jitsu?

*Throws rain of shadow surikens.*

You can't evade or block them all, samurai. I'll take your straw hat as souvenir.

> Visit Paris tourist traps
fixed for you

So good.

Visit Paris* please not France
Also this: Mini Eiffel towers sellers don't even look at me when I go to the Tuileries, cuz I'm not wearing short pants with high socks.

Autistic women are the best

*draw you in and kiss gently*

*my arms draw around you head but you suddenly pull away*

> What's wrong tsundere friend?

*you look sheepishly and kick your feet*

> "It's just... i've never known a man's touch before"

*I smile from one corner of my mouth and guide your hands down my trousers, you quiver with virignal anticipation*

How are they in bed, i would imagine they don't move and just squirm

France isn't too bad and most frenchies I've met are pretty decent but I can't for the life of me understand why anyone would go to Paris. Literally any other European major city is better. Fuck I'd rather go to Moldavia than go to Paris

Dominique Pinon good lad

based?
> Delicatessen
> La Cité des Enfants Perdus
> Alien Resurrection
> Un long dimanche de fiançailles
> TS Spivet or whatever the fuck the title is

Just a tryhard claiming he's revolutionnary. Would have never been "someone" without the work of Caro. Jan Kounen is so much better.

...

Try Praha for cunts. Cut your throat if they thought they'd get away with it.

>Bioshock was original

You're citing movies that I watched and enjoyed as a kid ( except Spivet, didn't watch ). I don't claim it's revolutionary or anything, I just liked all of his "old" movies.
I would love to hear what you have to say about Caro or Jan Kounen though, as I don't know anything about that.

Well desu mate you're sounding like a total faggot

k y s

>worst human being on earth

you live in wonderland where there is no criminals or assholes ?

I never got this, it is kiss yourself? Like a self-love mantra? Thanks if so.

Jan Kounen is a director who worked for advertising, so he has a real visual talent. Check his movies Dobermann (hardcore polar), Blueberry (mystic western) and 99F (a mindfuck movie about the world of advertising).

You're on Cred Forums lad.
Just be content you're not one of the angry at life fucks here.
Von Trier is good here. Okay Dancer is good but not because of Tryhard.
Cred Forums likes OGF. Like The Room only no laughs.
Tree of Life too. The best remedy for insomnia.

SHUT THE FUCK SPEAKING FOR Cred Forums FAGGOT

> Tree of Life too. The best remedy for insomnia
kek

Obviously. Retard

Oh so actually I know the guy, have watched 99 francs and know the comic Bluebery, i'm guessing the movie is made after that. Thought Doberman was shite though.
My roommate had me watch Tree of Life. Now that's what I'd call tryhard.

mate he was trying to fuck you

Kounen was supposed to direct the fifth Alien, called Revelation, after the release of Resurrection. It would have showed battle on Earth between xenomorphs and humans. Too bad it was never made, and they prefered this awful AvP from Paul "I rape my favourite vidya saga" WS Anderson.

...

>when he asks you if you've slept around

...

>you live in wonderland where there is no criminals or assholes ?
did you forget where you are? he probably lives in his moms basement 24/7

to be fair, we all thought Fincher ruined the Alien franchise for years and no one cared what came after.
Actually, 3 is a great film.
It makes Prometheus look like shit. Well, Prometheus is standalone shit and makes 3 look so much more palatable.

Fincher is a cuck fuck faggot who couldn't make a good movie if his bull's life depended on it.

He didn't, hadn't seen it too. He liked it, although not as much as me constantly joking about the movie.

>It would have showed battle on Earth between xenomorphs and humans. Too bad it was never made
I read that script. William Gibson? It wasn't developed for a reason.
Made Dark Horse comics I believe.

I don't know, each time it's the same: success > projects of sequels and/or spin-offs > scenario and then, nothing.

I consider Se7en as one of the most brilliant movies ever.

Ron's best role. This and Beauty and the Beast.

She's quirky, bro.

What?

based fitgirl

Okay, maybe just the Belarus hookers.

C'est originale woo
Jemapelle user j'adore and Baguette is all I know.
Sorry Frog bros.

i watched this recently and for some reason i barely remember anything that happened in it. i know i enjoyed it but i can't think of any particular plot points or anything. am i dying

there is not that much of a plot, it´s more like a slice if life comedy. that said, i enjoy it for it's comfyness

The fact that this movie was successful tells me how much the people want to be unique and special so they try to identify themselves with the first "special & unique" character they see.

>Praha

That's Czech for Prague, and it's a really safe city, wtf are you talking about?

nice tripcode btw

Fukin rekt

You did this in purpose, right?

looks like pretentious shit

She's an annoyingly cliche manic pixie dream girl, but there's no denying that it's a great film.

>*holds up spork*

It started off great but then she went on her slutscapades and I lost interest pretty quickly, I don't even remember what happens 10 minutes into the film

wtf, you guys hate this movie because Amellie has a normal sex life?

this, desu

I love you!!!

>he doesn't know I poked holes in the condom

>he didn't like the movie bc the quirky loner girl isn't an untouched virgin
really Cred Forums, fucking really?

bitter plebs detected

Check his wife

I've always laughed at this scene cause If I realize a girl is making faces while I fuck her I'd go full berserker with her ass

How an hot girl like her is supposed to be virgin at 25 or whatever age she's supposed to be during the film ? Even loner experiments and that's exactly what she did, she found some random guys and tried sex to see what all the fuss was about (and get bored quickly)

>a Cred Forumsedditor

figures

She tried it, had sex, but it didn't work out for her. Obviously the point is she could have sex earlier if she wanted it. Not because she was ugly, but because she was fucked in the head. Think of it like a female version of a Cred Forums autist. She was special.

>mfw it's not a BBC

>tfw unsuccessfully hitting on basically borderline autistic girl I met
>1 friend she's had since elementary school and literally no one since then
>doesn't go out, doesn't watch tv, doesn't read, doesn't listen to music
>just talks about her pets incessantly
>even she's gotten laid even though she's 5 years younger than me

kill me

How can these people not get it.
It was an awesome movie.
It was the perfect feelgood movie.
It had a smart script, well-written characters and good acting.
It was techniccally brilliant as well, full of beautiful pictures and smart usage of tricks.

It was about loneliness, depression and anxiety, and how to battle it, finding friends and happyness, a topic that resonates with everyone and in the end it offered a ray of hope.

> trying to fuck a childhood friend
Cred Forums could have told you how it ends

I'm fuckbuddies with a girl on the spectrum, she won't stop unless she makes me cum twice, it's cool, but also a bit too feral and i end squirming like a lil pig.

I'm wracking my brain to figure out how anyone could possibly conclude that she is "the worst human being on earth." She's just a lonely weirdo that likes to meddle in her neighbors personal lives.

>slut
Is it because she has sex? That's a pretty normal thing that people do all the time, user.

I don't get it, didn't she have sex like once?

exactly, what a fucking slut, doesn't it?

>2001
It was a less cucked time.

>tfw I'm almost 30 and I've never cuddled that way.

That's a good thing. Magic coming your way soon enough.

Nah wizardry isn't a real thing, I'm 31.

Girly girls can't do that, they feel the weight so easily. You don't have to be a full fat fatass.
The guy in that scene is skinny as fuck and even he is resting on his elbows.

It's not real.

Just because you can't pass out with all your weight on her doesn't mean that being cuddled by a qt like that isn't fucking great.

Everyone in here quit being bitter.

Movie is ok, characters are likable, all good fun.

Now the bitches who try to act like her...stay away from them, don't even acknowledge their existence, these girls are beyond delusional about their own specialness, you ever see a pixie cut run for the hills.

>user has never been in bed with a girl
paint me surprised

its basically a red flag

only dumb stuck up and frigid cunts like this film

I was. That's why I said it. I'm a lanklet DYIL forever and a girl with her bodytype can't cuddle in that position with me passed out for more than 5 minutes.

>DYIL
okay, help me out here.
DYEL -> do you even lift
DIEL _> do i even lift
DYIL -> ???

just testan

TIA? More like TI/TV/!! amirite?

I live in Montmartre. Shocking to see reality

It's good. I liked it.

hey, what did you just call me!?

this semen slurping meme movie isn't for me

>The whole notion that it's looked down on to have sex all the time confuses them
>It's why the british don't like them

No, it's because they're cheese eating surrender monkeys

Ah yes. babies first foreign flick

Far from kino, disgusting

I've tried watching this movie like 4 times. I never make it to act three.

this is one of the movies i have seen many times, but i can't remember the ending. my brain blocks it? i don't want the feeling of the whole thing to end