"I think you're confused, I didn't come here with Brad and Leo. Glad I could clear that up."

"I think you're confused, I didn't come here with Brad and Leo. Glad I could clear that up."

>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>*Start crying and shitting uncontrollably*

And THAT, my friends, is how it's done.

>Sorry darling, but I don't think they're into shallow women with hearts of stone

>audience arupts with laughter, many having to go to the emergency room for cardiac arrest
>humiliated weather girl never shows her face on TV again and later kills herself

It would've been perfect.

why the fuck doesn't he just lose weight and that gay beard

>*throw his jacket in the air as a distraction*
>snap her neck
>heh...and they say violence doesn't solve problems
>*dusts hands*

>Fat virgins will never ever be able to come up with a witty retort

LMAOing at your life

>Sounds like my average Saturday night.
There, done it.

Do you honestly think that was funny?

" I think you should take that back. Otherwise I will throw a hissy fit, go back to America and cancel all my appointments like a whiny little kid who can't take an offensive joke. After that some losers on a chinese cartoon website will spend weeks and weeks trying to come up with clever retorts to your joke while failing miserably at it."

What does the french woman says though?

I dont understand the outrage, it was just a joke.

she said he is unfuckable, which is true.

You couldn't possibly sound more autistic, OP, well done.

"Leave? What, like a tree?"

>" I think you are too old for brad xD"

>Now why would you say that. Why would you say that. Come here, why would you say that, no no it's ok, wait one second, why would you say that? That's ridiculous, Do you like making less of people, is that it? That’s incredibly rude. I’m here giving you an interview and answering your questions and you do something really nasty. You're a jerk.

>Ummm excuse me? They're both people, not hunks of meat for you too oggle. Your insensitivy is shocking and I would thank you to refrain from saying such things about human beings

Was that so hard you fat, subway-loving cumlord?

Tom has the looks and charisma to pull it off though

>Sorry darling, but I don't think they're into shallow women with hearts of stone

Well Brad married Angelina Jolie so he kinda is

And a DIET Coke.

>They could do better and frankly [pause for effect] so could I

that's the best retort you can do in this situation aside from killing yourself on live tv

Nothing like beating a dead horse into the ground.

Think your funny dumb bitch? *pulls out meatball marinara* Well who's fucking laughing now? *unloads meatball rounds into audience*

>cuts to jonah eating subway
>sorry I wasn't listening

Good thing the age of consent here is like 13....so you'd never be in a room w me sister.

Jonah: No more threesomes.
Host: What?
Jonah: I said, no more threesomes. Maybe you didn't hear about it, you've been in France a long time. They didn't go over there and tell you. I don't arrange threesomes anymore.
Host: Relax, will ya? Ya flip right out, what's got into you? I'm breaking your balls a little bit, that's all. I'm only kidding with ya...
Jonah: Sometimes you don't sound like you're kidding, you know, there's a lotta people around...
Host: I'm only kidding with you, we're having a show, I just came home and I haven't seen you ever and I'm breaking your balls, and you're getting fucking fresh. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you.
Jonah: I'm sorry too. It's okay. No problem.
Host: Okay, salud.
Host: [takes a drink] Now go home and get your fuckin' friends.
Jonah: Mother fuckin' mutt! You, you fucking piece of shit!
Host: [taunting] Yeah, yeah, yeah, come on, come on, come on!

What was his response? He probably fucks better looking bitches regularly

No he doesn't. He's an obese kike who stuffs his ass full of Subway

best one yet

put that roastie in her place

Leave out the so could I. Any attempt at trying to look "better than her" comes off as desperate.

...

>what the fuck did you just say to me you little bitch? I'll have you know...

>I make you laugh a lot? Like a clown, I amuse you?

>And how much will this cost?

Ya but he's rich. Are you really that out of touch with reality?

>TELEPORTS BEHIND HER
>STRIKES WITH KATANA
ONLY A VIRTUOUS WOMAN MAY TOUCH MY BEARD. AND YOU "M'LADY" ARE A WHORE.

Brad and Leo wouldn't do that to me. You know what they'd do? They'd tie you to the bed, pretending they wanted to be kinky like that, then they'd invite me back, and THEY'D leave.

Basically, they would help me to rape you. Welcome to Hollywood, bitch.

>you think I care? I bet your pussy looks like roast beef on monterey cheddar. I prefer ... something more like black forest ham on italian

can't believe he said this on TV

>"If I wanted a joke, I'd follow you into the John and watch you take a leak"

>You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little fucked up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?

>You know...

>No, no, I don't know, you said it. How do I know? You said I'm funny. How the fuck am I funny, what the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what's funny!