Computer, create a perfect simulation of the early-21st century anonymous imageboard Cred Forums...

>Computer, create a perfect simulation of the early-21st century anonymous imageboard Cred Forums, with the caveat that every post I make receives 100 replies, (You)s colloquially, or your mother will die in her sleep tonight. Reading this negates all your immunities.

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Captain, did I ever tell you about the time I engaged in sexual intercourse with Chief of security, Lieutenant Tasha Yar, who was subsequently killed off 20 episodes later?
She was a good fuck.

It's only funny when Barclay does it.

>Computer, scan Counselor Troi's most recent bowel movement
>engage all replicators to continuously expell a perfect replication of Counsellor Trois last bowel movement
>disengage all safety protocols
>begin

>Computer, create an exact duplicate of Counselor Troi's posterior, based on her latest body scans and enlarge so it completely covers the rear wall of the Holodeck.
>Computer, detect any recent flatulence from Counselor Troi and provide me with precise olfactory and audial perimeters.
>Computer, have the anus emanate said flatulence every 1.5 seconds. Disengage safety protocols
>Computer, send "Barclay Suicide Note, Revision 5" to every senior officer's comm system.

Computer, scan Counsellor Troi's quarters for trace amounts of compounds directly associated with Betazoid flatulence.
>Scanning complete.
Computer, replicate compounds, enhance olfactory sensations by 1000%.
Computer, generate a new enhanced replica every 5 seconds.
>Warning, continuing replication may result in poisonous atmospheric conditions.
Computer, disengage safety protocols and continue program.

god damnit

W-will the computer create women for you to have sex with? Or is this a no-fun allowed computer?

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>Computer, create a holographic waifu of this woman who I have never met using her body and give her a bimbo personality desire to fuck me. As a senior officer on the most important ship in the entire Federation I need to set a good example.

What if the computer simulation takes you to before we had (You)s? How could you possibly go back to that savage time?

My inverse tachyon dispersion matrix prevents me from losing my immunity

hmmm

>Computer, rename program "Scaphism_1" to "Happy Birthday Wesley"
>Send a message to Ensign Crusher's quarters telling him to report to Holodeck 1 for a surprise at 0600.
>If he refuses, tell him the Captain will be in attendance.
>Send another message to all senior staff, informing them that Ensign Crusher will be using his accumulated shore leave for a trip to Risa at 0630.
>Send a final message to Engineering that a Federation Holodeck specialist will be conducting a prolonged inspection on Holodeck 1 and he is not to be disturbed for any reason.
>Once Ensign Crusher enters Holodeck 1, disable all safety protocols, override Ensign Crusher's voice command, and run program "Happy Birthday Wesley" for precisely 14 days.

Barclay is the only sane character on the show

So does that visor allow him to see?

Fuck you nerd

that's what i said, booty twaps!

b0s

He can see through clothes

How could virgins exist in this future? You could simulate any person you want for the sole purpose of fucking

>downloading the same file twice

>forgetting to turn off safety protocols

Fucking Geordie

But you'd still be a virgin. Fucking an advanced blow up doll doesn't change that.

Yeah, I read that thread too OP, you fucking faggot.

archive.4plebs.org/tv/thread/75314955/#75328689

Friendly reminder that this utopian society could only exist under socialism/communism. If it were a capitalist society, it would cost $100000 per word and you'd have to mention Elon Musk every time.

How fucking new are you?
>types Anonymous into the Name bar
>uses the 4plebs archive instead of the one on this fucking website
>assumes that I myself was not the one who posted that original comment, only to post it again here as the OP
Fucking hell, summer ended already.

Wait, so how does it work? The computer will be the one that will have to follow the rules? Will it be the board entirely with posts that are like that that require those 100 replies? Or does it have to be just of the specific thread?

The simulation and parameters are flawed.

>types Anonymous into the Name bar
But I didn't. Look again.
>uses the 4plebs archive instead of the one on this fucking website
It's the first one that comes up in Google. I see no reason whatsoever to give a shit which one I use.
>assumes that I myself was not the one who posted that original comment, only to post it again here as the OP
That's not really a difficult assumption to make. Secondly, you're still rehashing material.

We're the simulation, friendo. Your entire life has simply been the procedural product of a computer program, with its ultimate conclusion being this moment, in which you satisfy the simulation's criteria.

>computer. Recreate Brendan Frasier in his prime. Disengage alimony protocols.

>implying that Cred Forums isn't literally 90% rehashing content
Now I know you're new.

K. I still think it was lazy to take that post and start a thread with it.

"Computer, tell me about your sexual organs."

ITT: He sees your penis.

Ayy lmao

Dr Bashir. I'm Dominion.

>Computer commence program Clinton1996_footworship.exe
>disengage safety protocols

you planning to crash this place with no detectable life signs?

>utopian
That's how it works in starfleet, and it's fascism.

not bad for 20 years ago

Fuck

Computer, generate Leah Brahms hologram.

Now, reconfigure Leah Brahms hologram's vaginal cavity to include a naturally-secreted adhesive that will permanently bond to a human foreskin, corrosive acidic secretions and titanium vagina dentata.

Increase Leah Brahm's sexual attraction to Lieutenant Geordi LaForge by 1500%, increase strength by 65%, increase aggression by 150%, and place hologram in extreme state of estrous.

Computer, deactivate holodeck entrance, arch and Jeffries tube access. Generate an intermittent tachyon field that will prevent attempts at transport to or from the holodeck for the duration of the program. Disengage safety protocols.

Computer, run program.

Cred Forums, their memes dank

She has the face of Miley Cyrus here.

fuck you

Should I watch any Star Trek after TOS?

This is Nana Visitor.

...

Yes?

Are all the series necessary though?

Nah, But DS9 is decent

>not disabling safety protocols.

That's harsh even for Wesley.

Wil Wheton, however...

Considering there is private ownership, Pecard's family has a large vineyard.
There is an economy and people get paid differently, its just replicators have really made most objects values nearly obsolete.
It is not Communism, it may be Socialism, but it looks much more like Fascism envisioned by Mussolini. The only difference is there is no cult of personality that most Fascist (and Socialist) states traditionally have. Although typically the cult of personality seems to only exist for the founders, expect in North Korea.

yes

Yhfdfs

We don't know exactly the circumstances under which Picard owns his vineyard. The fact that money no longer exists could mean that people could continue to own property but not generate profit from it

u were always my least favorite char geordi and im glad ur a cripple and never got a gf

The existence or lack of is pretty inconsistent in Star Trek. Although they do outright say it doesn't exist, mainly due to Gene Roddenberry's own political leanings.
Still there's enough evidence of some sort of currency system. It could semantics, like Japan having the 6th most powerful military in the world, despite making it clear they don't have an "army."

Picard's family owns a vineyard, it belonged to his father, and was passed on to his brother because he was the oldest. And then its implied that it will be given to Picard's nephew.