Help me Cred Forums...i need a doctor
Help me Cred Forums...i need a doctor
Brody Rivera
Mason Green
Hello yes it is I, Cred Forums.
What do you need a doctor for?
Christopher Ortiz
baka, not nice, with the fuckin' choppa
bop 'em, scope on the nigga, who shot ya?
Jayden Reyes
Thank Bob, it's Doctor Cred Forums!.
I seem have lost my right femur in a murdering accident.
Are there any pills I might take?
Jackson Roberts
In my professional opinion...
YOU'RE DEAD! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Justin Thompson
hmmm i see. Quite a tricky situation then. I could take half of your left femur and attach it to where your bone is missing. This is a complicated procedure which could make you theoretically walk again... But I'm afraid you will be a 5'11" manlet for the rest of your life. Do you want me to go ahead?
Ayden Robinson
Sorry as a Republican I can't let you have free healthcare.
You'll just have to die, LMAO.
Ian Bailey
Gosh, it's worse than I thought!
But doctor, can't we just attach wheels to the stump? Perhaps an electric motor so my 100 meter dash game is enhanced?
Henry Torres
My god! Why didn't I think of this. You know this might just work...
NURSE! I need 100ml of stumpdisinfectonyl, stat!
Jackson Perez
Vote Bernie. ND YOU WILL HAVE FREEEE HEALTHCARE. Amazing and free. Vote and you will not die like a dog.
Benjamin Lewis
Rest assured my friend, my Medigun will heal you in a matter of seconds! The only side effects will be that your heart will double in size, gain sentience and attempt to seize control of all of the world's Australium, but I'm sure we can sort that out later!
Robert Harris
Yes Doctor Cred Forums - tee hee, right away Doctor Cred Forums *shimmy shake*
Daniel Turner
The Australium is a rare commodity, I fear I must take the chance - I may even reach a compromise with my soon to be sentient heart!
We must save my 100 meter dash skills!
I give my consent!
Jayden Johnson
Thank you nurse.
Patient, please stay calm and lie down on this gurney
Gavin Bailey
"HELP. I've fallen and I'm all fucked up!"
Asher Ross
Excellent! I will now use the Medigun to heal your wounds!
Ian Lopez
Your colleague seems to be hellbent on installing wheels on me, I'm keen on the medigun though...
Fire away.
Tyler Ortiz
Damn dude, you got me lmao
Colton King
uncle ben?
Mason Roberts
I AM FULLY CHARGED, YOU SHOULD HEAL FROM YOUR WOUNDS SHORTLY SCHWEINHUND!
Dylan Peterson
Obamacare cost me a bunch of money you must be underage/neet go make some money
You don't need a doctor you just need Jesus and prayer. Take this meme and make it your phone background, you will gain strength
Andrew Ortiz
I feel energized and full of pep! I must now go and give my ol' gel a jolly good rogering!
Then for the world's Australium deposits! I have an urge!... must own... them all!
Aiden Nelson
I REQUIRE ASSISTANCE! PROTECT THE AUSTRALIUM!
Dear god, I miscalculated! His heart has grown five times it's normal size, gained sentience and is now taking full control of his body and mind!
Xavier Jackson
NOTHING WILL STAND IN MY WAY!
THE ASTUALIUM WILL BE MINE! ALL MINE, MUAHAHAHA!
Also, I can tap dance again, this is peachy keen! *tappity tap*
Thomas Kelly
dude this thread sucks lmao
Xavier Moore
Well, there is one problem. You see, I anticipated that you would attempt to take all the world's Australium once the healing process was completed, so I had Scout drink some of his Bonk Atomic Punch to run so incredibly fast that you wouldn't realise he was putting the foetus of a Megaladon Shark into your rectal cavity! With one push of a button, a fully grown Megaladon Shark will cause you to completely explode, destroying your heart and the rest of your body! I shall heal you again shortly afterwards, although I think I shall need to find you a new heart...
Daniel Green
Gosh - I'm so confused, can you make it a shipstone heart and infuse my bones with adamantium? Will I ever play the piano again? Will the Megalodon be taken over by the Australium Hungry Heart and wreck havok on the the worlds reserves? I feel confused and frightened, oh consternation, uproar, fear.