Remember when the south park kids use to act like kids?

Aren't they 5th graders now?

C R E E K
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Still in the fourth grade

>he didn't have a girlfriend in the 4th grade

Well shit.

I never had a girlfriend at all user

>Not having one by 3rd
Bitch nigga I had a steady girlfriend since 2nd all the way to 6th.

Only reason we broke up was going to different states and neither of us were interested in long distance relationships.

The fuck kind of childhood did you have OP?

I had a girlfriend then, but we never did anything. We were going out in name only, maybe we held hands? I remember once picking up and throwing another kid who was hitting on her in front of me but that's it, she used to write my name with love hearts all over her bits of work. I don't even remember breaking up.

I've also just realised that all my relationships existed through school or college and then non-existant after that. I'm so alone Cred Forums... I guess I'll just watch more bailey jay and jack it to incest porn.

I had a boyfriend in sixth grade when I was like 11 or 12. We used to sit together at lunch and share snacks.

Stan was dating Wendy back in the early seasons when he was 8 or 9

With all this continuity stuff they should really move to 5th grade already.

That's always been the norm, you're all just losers.

Who was Kenny in a relationship with?

Maybe he never broke up with Tammy until now.

>dying from blowjob-related illnesses constantly
>Just come back because Elder God cult
>No one remembers him dying so, fuck it. Literally.
Well that just went right into some magical realm shit.

Their new teacher is a qt

I didn't have a girlfriend, but I had a girl in elementary school who made me her "best friend". Cheek kisses for days, niggas.

what's the ending song name?

Has Tweek switched schools or something?

Wow user, out in the open and everything?

>15 or so years ago
>channel surfing
>Maury is on
>ten year old kid brags about how he's having sex every day
>confused about how he even knows about it because when I was ten we hadn't even had sex ed yet (that was the next year)

>I had a girlfriend then, but we never did anything
the same applies to the south park kids. they act depressed because they are just playing out the trope.

i remember one time though, i was in third grade and my girlfriend and i were trying to have sex. We had NO idea what sex even is, all we knew is that a girl and boy were on top of each other and they eventually had to become naked. So we just made out for a while until we decided to do something else.

>food packed with excess hormones, a diet high in sugar and fat and low in fiber, lead in the water, mold in the air
Of course kids are maturing faster than ever, their bodies think they're going to die or be sterile at 25.

I didn't know grounding people up into chili was something all kids did user

what was the song they played at the end?

Kyle really wants Cartman's dick, that years of Stockholm syndrome is getting to him

He was sitting with Craig in first episode. I think he hasn't been in their class for long time.

Not gonna lie, I was surprised he missed having Cartman around on Twitter. Some people say he just felt bad about getting the wrong guy but that seems like a stretch with the teary montage and all.
Does Cartman even post anything besides photos of himself looking ripped?

Kyle and Cartman have been getting closer since season 16, Jewpacabra shows he's pretty much the only one who cares about Cartman

There are two fourth grade classes so he probably switched to the other class. I mean who wouldn't if you have Garrison for your teacher?

>starting to
I was 10 over a decade ago and you wouldn't believe how much porn I was jerking off to back then

the joke was that they "killed" cartman

Fapping to pixels is one thing, 3D humans is another.

It has happened many times before.

And I thought I was degenerate for starting at 12.

In junior high high school girls made me their hug pillow. It was nice, during every, break high school girls were hugging me or sitting on my laps.

Even if they didn't kill Cartman I did find it REALLY satisfying for him to be cornered like that. Also, I thought Clyde was supposed to be the "pussy" friend, how come he was the one to bring up taking out Eric?

I had 2 girlfriends in 1st grade, and a different girl every year from 2nd to 5th.

No girlfriend from 6th to 9th, had one from 10th to 11th, I left her at the beginning of my 12th, and now I'm in my third year of college with no gf.

Yeah but in-universe they take it seriously and feel bad about it.

>tfw I thought they were really going to kill him
>tfw I thought this even though he was innocent for this but I didn't care

Clyde likes giving dramatic speeches, I think he had one defending Cartman in the TFBW trailer.

I had a girlfriend in kindergarden.

Wow, what did you do to him?

Nobody decent will ever marry you now.

>boyfriend
Are you Anons guys?

My nephews have had "girlfriends" even in, like, first grade. Doesn't mean anything thoug, they're stupid kids who get together because TV says "only loser don't have relationships in school" and they aren't losers(!) so they ask a random classmate to be their boyfriend/girlfriend.

I can be whatever you want me to be, sweetheart.

I had a girlfriend in kindergarten.

Oh yeah? Well I had a girlfriend in preschool!

Was she a slut too?

I had a girlfriend in 4th grade, but I don't think it was a serious thing. It was just a girl I hung out with and we called each other boyfriend and girlfriend.

My first girlfriend was in fourth grade, I'm assuming you were ugly and/or fat as a kid. Hope puberty changed that

I am gonna be VERY pissed off if the show doesnt lampoon the troope of female love interest (or girls in general) being jackasses to the guys due to misunderstandings and lead to them attacking thirds wave feminism.

It would have been funnier if they actually tried to kill him, them breaking his stuff was too obvious

Who's the boy Annie broke up with?

>That episode Kenny's death got onto America's Funniest Home Videos
I was wondering what would happen if one of the boys caught a rerun of that episode.

Goth Kids When?

Did this cute French girl ever had a boyfriend when she was still on the show?

Why would you think they would actually go there?

remember how disappointing was the "conclusion" of the last season arc?

Damien was probably as close as you could get.

Pip IS in Hell, he's probably getting Damien's shaft all the time now as his "eternal damnation".

Is he our guy?

LONDON

yeah, this scene was pretty boring. And every girl did the same method with the note passing?

It'll be interesting to see how this plays out in the following episodes

My school had 5th graders "dating," the principal actually called an assembly to tell us to stop that shit. Basically meant fuck-all, even middle school only had fucking at the margins.

It's always the ones you least suspect.

Australian here. Girlfriends were basically unheard of until age 12-13. At that point it was the white trash getting them. Normal folk probably started 15-16. At 18 there were still popular guys that were virgins.

I've always wondered whether paedos are responsible for children being sexual, in fiction.

I didn't beat off until age 12 and at that point I was still a couple of years away from being attracted enough to non-photoshopped 3DPD.

We use to have pretend weddings and other dopey shit back in my day.
In the mind of a child, if a girl thought you were cute you two were "dating."

I imagine the same applies to the show since SP favorite gag is to make you think something is serious business and then subverts by revealing it to be something silly or trivial.

Right? One of the reasons I don't like the kids of Loud House or Bruce in Gotham is because the kids are in elementary but are trying to get girlfriend's or boyfriends. actually I don't mind Bruce. Its how he become the playboy. Its just I hate pretentious kids.

i could have. a girl had a crush on me, i was just a little oblivious to how much until i had already moved

I work at a grade school as yard duty. Kids of all ages most certainly have boyfriends and girlfriends, all to varying degrees of seriousness. Even the kindergartners flirt with one another.

I posted this before but I'd like some other opinions on it.

South Park had an interesting suicide analog in the form of quitting Twitter.

At what point is "If you're going to do it, just do it and stop whining about it" an acceptable response? You can't say "never" because nobody's patience is truly unlimited and there's going to be a point where you're just not going to want to deal with the person anymore.

>having girlfriends in the 4th Grade

I did. We did all sorts of sex stuff together. Looking back on it now, I think she may have been molested by a family member.

I'm a big fan of free will. If someone comes up to me and say they're going to kill themselves, I'll try to give them a list of reasons not to do it, after all maybe they are behaving rashly and haven't thought the whole thing through. List off loved ones, "nowhere to go but up", their own potential, etc.
If at the end of my spiel, they are still committed then I'm not going to stop them. It's their choice and some people just aren't built to cope.
If they come to me and say "I'm going to kill myself unless..." or "I'll kill myself; that'll show 'em!"—like what Malkinson was doing—I'd probably just ignore them because chances are they are just saying it for attention.

No, he's a jew.

Maybe you have a split personality and your other self is actually her brother, so to her, it was all the same.

Wendy and Stan have been around since the pilot.

They werent together, unless you just mean the crush. That was considered odd though by the others.

I had a girlfriend in 2nd grade, but in elementary school a "girlfriend" was a girl you occasionally held hands with and ate lunch with, but not much else. She let me kiss her on the cheek during recess once, though.

Little did I know, that would be my first AND last kiss. Now I'm 20 and I've never even touched a boob ;_;

Kids are really fucking horny, even if they don't realize they are.
Stan wanted to bone Wendy since he was 8.

>not having a wife chosen for you before birth for political reasons and uniting wearing nations.

Plebs

IT be cute if Pip is now Satans foster child

you didn't?

what kind of worthless looser are you?

I had a "girlfriend" in the first grade. It's kinda weird but not unheard of.

>TFW start masturbating at age 10 but don't really know what's up
>TFW cute, tall amazon girl walks to class with you when you're 11 or 12
>TFW she asks if you want to hold hands
>TFW your hands touch

More like since Season 14. Remember when Cartman's trying to help Kyle getting more Facebook friends and in the jersey episode Kyle saved Cartman from getting raped by Snooki and the episode ends with Cartman thanking Kyle and calling him "my little jew" while pinching his cheeks.

Girls had crushes as early as Kindergarden man. Preschool even, I had a crush.

My first gf was 5th grade, we just hung out in school a lot. Went to a dance together in 6th grade middle school.

Granted I was still giving cootie shots when I was 10 but still man, it happens.

>Remember when the south park kids use to act like kids?
when exactly was that?

youtube.com/watch?v=YMgjnAgmaho

Prison Planet doesn't count.

>Kids are really fucking horny, even if they don't realize they are.

Pedophile, please.

Is he our goyim?

>member Black Hawk Down?

youtube.com/watch?v=BWAhVbayGv4

Stan and Wendy have been a couple since the first season though.

First episode IIRC

Yeah, but they were one of the only kids in a relationship, now everyone is dating.

No, now every one of you bitches is complaining.

>latest ep is about a Jew trying to incite a race/gender war
Letting Raimi write for South Park was a mistake.

>member when the south park kids use to act like kids
No. Kids don't make grandiloquent speeches about gays and genetical experimentation.

I had a gf when I was 6, not sure where that falls in the imperial system.

I was French kissing my gf and touching her peepee when I was 8.
Sad part is that was as far as my sexual experience would go.

More than 10 seasons
Almost ever season had a christmas special
and these motherfuckers still haven't updated these models. They should atleast be taller than what they are now.

Nigga I had girlfriends in 4th grade

>Remember when the south park kids use to act like kids?

Kids dont say "Fuck" or "Shit" every five seconds. And girlfriends dont are big deal, only if you are a woman educated in with generic disney princess

SP is the western Pokemon. they stopped of referencing time except for actual events (Obama, and Trump)

Maybe he was freaking out because he learned Karen had a boyfriend who she broke up with and it hit him like bricks.

What, you seriously first heard about sex in sex ed?!

>Pip returns as Damian's new adopted brother
>New exchange student that the new foreign kids don't know
>The original kids panic because they saw him die
>One of the first steps in shattering South Park's reality and time