New Avengers Vol 1 Storytime (Part 7)

>it's a "Bendis writes Scarlet Witch" issue

>it's a "Bendis writes Scarlet Witch" issue
Oh God.

>"It was the worst day in Avengers history."

As has been said every time since it was mentioned, probably not in the top 5.

Huh, at least he kept Hawkeye in the House of M outfit.

There is no god, only Bendis.

And now we know how the Hawkeye costume was shot to the wall.

>both wearing bathrobes
>Strange looking like he's still putting it on

What, did he interrupt your orgy or something?

I admit, I've been reading mostly 70's Strange lately (just finished up the first Shuma-Gorath arc) so I can't remember what exactly he looked like around now, but did Strange really have a Dad stache like this?

>"This Chaos Magic of hers, her mutant power"

Did Bendis ever bother explaining why he added that "No such thing as chaos magic" retcon? Like, it seems like such an arbitrary thing, and it's not like he ever did anything with it.




Did... did Wundagore mountain always have a town near it? I feel like common sense would say "stay away from the mountain ran by a dude who mutates animals, that's haunted by a demon-god."

Maybe I'm a pleb, or I just don't like the man's faces, but I don't think I like Maleev's art.
When I say I don't like his faces, it's not like I'm saying they're Henderson-esque monstrosities, but... well, look at the model he uses for Namor. They're technically good, but I dislike how the guys all seem look vaguely ugly.

Maybe it's just his guys though, since this woman doesn't seem to look good enough.


>this is supposed to be Wanda

I think you mean Scarlet Tits, because she looks to have no arms.

No, she clearly has them. They're just hiding under that curtain while she does a Silence of the Lambs dance.

Bendis can't imagine having a platonic semi-eunich manservant like Wong for anything other than sexual.

Because he wishes he was some burly black fellow's fuckdoll.

>"Oh, they came here once, to the mountains."

Fairly certain the Avengers have gone to Wundagore mountains a few times.

As we all know from Jessica Jones, of course.

Somewhere the Vision is crying, and doesn't know why.

>but did Strange really have a Dad stache like this?

Yeah, probably.
Strange and Stark both eventually started having really inconsistent facial hair as Marvel editors increasingly stopped giving a rats ass about doing their jobs.

Clint should not be this freaked out about dead.
He knows tons of people who've been dead and come back. Including himself if you count Infinity Gauntlet or Onslaught.


It's Bendis, he don't got to explain shit.

>He banged Wanda

Maleev is clearly just tracing pictures here.
Strange is IDENTIFIABLY Sean Penn.

I thought she turned out to be a doombot.

Fuckin hell, I can see it now! It'd be one thing if he traced Vincent Pryce!

>that's haunted by a demon-god.

Clearly you've never been in a cult! That's part of the appeal! That way, when Cthon wakes after your years of prayers, your screaming madness ends as you are among the first to die!

Since we won't be doing Children's Crusade, yes.
You are now imagining Doctor Doom personally designing doombots that are lifelike and comparable to Wanda Maximoff.

Oh Hi, Clearly Natalie Portman.

>The closet
Oh look, another dropped plot thread....

Yeah, but Bendis also had the Avengers shitting their pants over House of M, when Busiek's run had them immediately get their shit together when the world went Camelot.

I keep trying to place Clint and coming up dry.

Wanda keeps changing from panel to panel. (Damn you, Chaos Magick!!!)

I wonder if he personally tested the artificial vaginas. Somehow it doesn't seem like Doom would debase himself with a real doll, but then how often do you get to have a threesome with two Scarlet Witches?

Well, by that point the Avengers included famous man-baby Wolverine, who probably gets PTSD seizures from people having a birthday party.

Once, but on a dare. Wasn't worth it.

God damn, look at the neckline on that.


Yu's art is... specialized? It works for some things and not for others.
Would be good for a horror book. Could maybe use less in-style inking to clean it up sometimes because it's pretty scratchy a lot of the time.

How did she nunchuk a dude six feet into the air?

Honestly, unless the words mention it, assume it'll be forgotten about.

He's got a time machine, there's ways to work it.

Hitting REALLY hard. That's how nunchucks work, right?

So, when DID Elektra become leader of the Hand, anyway?

>"I've killed as many of them as I could."

Remember, it's not murder if it's ninjas.



I wanna say it was because of Enemy of the State? And her being like one of the only identifiable characters the Hand has, because they went too hard into the disposable ninja grunt theme?

Coming soon: Enemy of the State II:: The Sequel No One Wanted

Because this seems to be the only Elektra scene anyone remembers.

"The Sequel no one wanted" may as well be Marvel's motto recently.


>"If they have me, come and kill me."

It's the Hand, that won't work.

>"If they've killed me, avenge me."

They couldn't ASK for a better lead-in.

This is the first time we've seen the team since before Civil War started, and now they have a new line-up.
Wolverine, Spider-Man, Jessica Drew, Luke Cage, Iron Fist (it took them THIS long to bring Luke's best friend to the team), Doctor Strange, and "Ronin".

Why doesn't Luke have any eyes?

>Danny saying he doesn't do banter

That's the biggest lie Danny's ever said in his life. He does great banter when he's with his buddy Luke. It's when he's alone that he gets all broody.

Man, I forgot how old Strange and Clint used to be drawn only a few years ago.

>everyone stops fighting to see Luke Cage kick Elektra in the crotch
>even the Hand ninjas

It's the little things.

By the way, yes. You did indeed just see Spider-Man make a New Hope reference, despite what the MCU would have you believe.

>"They do not leave Japan."

Lady, the teleporter was Doctor "Sorcerer Supreme" Strange. You'll be lucky if they're even on EARTH.

Nobody else does, and he wants to fit in.

Just wait a bit, and see if the other artists in this series draw them similarly old.

You can reference something even if you're not a fan. For instance my ringtone is the Star Trek communicator noise and I don't even like Star Trek.

>Silver Samurai watched Mean Girls in his off-time

Yes, I've watched Mean Girls too, not the point.

>implying mcu and 616 are the same universe

While googling "Vitamin D milk", I got mostly people asking if it's the same as Whole Milk, it probably isn't the same as Skim Milk.

user, can you say with complete honesty that NOBODY would make the reference if I didn't nip that crap in the bud?

>"While you're here, can you arrest the armed robber?"
>"Nope, we're arresting you, and that's it."

>"Luke Cage doesn't fly."
>"He does NOW."

>making the password Shuma-Gorath

Fucking REALLY?

Yeah, Bendis writes Wong as a lot more of a dick.

Dark Reign>The Initiative (or whatever that period was called after Civil War)

>Peter making that "Civil War II" joke

I can't remember if another book used the "The Initiative" title. As far as I know, it was just the title of a series.


Because The Initiative didn't involve Norman "get the girl pregnant and snap her neck in public" Osborn.

Because this totally needed to be an entire page.


Seriously, NONE of them have pupils here.


>they faked Captain America still being alive

I can only assume the reason there's no speech bubbles coming out of Jessica's mouth in the bottom panel is because she trusted Carol, and she's currently using some words that wouldn't get allowed on cable TV.


Ouch, that sword got a bit into the neck there.





Even Spider-Man's pointing out how fucked up this bait was.

Damn. This page was supposed to go before

So according to Bendis, the character's fears are the following.
Sentry is afraid of the Void (makes sense).
Simon is afraid of Grim Reaper (eh, I can see that depending on the version)
Carol's afraid of Brood (remember, she's practically their Devil when she's Binary).
Ares is afraid of Zeus's judgement
Janet is afraid of Yellowjacket (because making it Ultron would imply Bendis puts any thought into this besides "dur, hank hit her")
Nat's afraid of generic Russian torture (Red Room training don't fuck around)

And Tony's... well "afraid" is probably the wrong word, but he's probably still got issues about holding himself responsible for Steve's death.


>"Guys, you hear that? I think I heard a gunshot?"
>shoots the gun herself as an excuse

>"Did you really hear a gunshot?"


>Jeryn working for Danny again
>the company is "Rand Corporation"

Remember when Namor's Oracle Inc bought out Rand-Meachum? NEITHER DOES MARVEL!

Okay, so even though he isn't registered with the SHRA, Danny Rand IS registered with the Us as a "lethal weapon" according to this page.

>Jeryn Hogarth is still portrayed as a morally ambigious man, even though he still wants the best for Danny

Credit where it's due, that fits. Although I'm beginning to think it's a coincidence.

So Dakota North is a character we're already familiar with. Around this time though, in Brubaker's Daredevil, she had become a recurring character, even having a thing together even though he's married at the time (his marriage was annuled after Mr. Fear got to her and drove her insane). She ended up officially splitting off from him after Shadowland.

>"Can you magically pop us out of the country?"

Why do I get the feeling that, if I looked hard enough, I could see him do exactly that?

>Brother Voodoo

Honestly, I liked his last appearance better than this shit.



Spoilers, man!



>"Hero fighting Hero. I wonder what the criminals are doing."

I love how Bendis is making jokes at Civil War here, and skip nearly a decade later, and he's doing Civil War II.

House of Ideas, OP


>"This is 'fighting a guy named Typeface' level of sucking."

Bendis is making fun of an obscure character! Take a drink!

>"I feel someone pulling my string. S.H.I.E.L.D., Hydra, out Secret War, the Civil War... I think they're connected."

Spoilers: neither "war" is connected.



The ending is You basically become such a supervillain that the people at Marvel decide to wipe your brain to absolve you of guilt for all the shit you've pulled so their readers will still like you

>Doctor Strange and Hawkeye on one page

So yeah, compare this page with their appearances in the first comic tonight.

>"How are you not dead?"
>"Weren't YOU dead once?"

You could blame it all on Secret Invasion though.

You forgot the part where he has sex with Pepper Potts and Maria Hill within days of eachother, just because.

So yeah, apparently now that Cap's gona, Bendis is officially writing Luke Cage as the leader.

>"It will clearly show anyone who is living with deception towards us."
>Jessica Drew clearly shown nervous in the fourth panel

>"Everyone here is pure of intention."
>"How do you KNOW?"
>"Because if you weren't, you would be having a seizure right now."
>nobody looking at Jessica Drew, who's bending over and gripping her neck

And now you know how Clint "Hawkeye" Barton became Ronin.

>Maya waking up and grabbing a sword

>>nobody looking at Jessica Drew, who's bending over and gripping her neck
I'm going to put that up to Pheromone powers distracting people

>Maya stabs Strange through the chest

Either way, when Bendis mentions how he foreshadowed Secret Invasion, that was basically the only example I remember

Damn it Bendis, you already referenced the original Elektra vs Bullseye scene!

Funny story, Anons. That globe thing in that second panel? In Ditko's Doctor Strange, THAT was the Eye of Agamotto, with Strange's amulet just being "my amulet".



>this random japanese

For reasons I can't possibly explain, I enjoy this Banter-off between Spidey and Hawkeye.



idk man from reading this shit again it's pretty obvious he was implying through Luke's speeches about his suspicions that the Skrull's were manipulating the events that lead to this point.

Nobody in Marvel is allowed to be married. Except for Luke and Jessica... because I guess Bendis knows where Quesada hid the corpses.

See, that's what he's IMPLYING, but as we see later, that's not the case for the Secret War and Civil War.




>"Do you speak Japanese?"
>"A little!"

This isn't actually Bendis not knowing shit about Iron Fist, since the one time he was in Japan, he didn't show ANY ability to speak Japanese. That was a while ago, so he's probably picked some stuff up since.
On the other hand, LUKE apparently knew how to speak Japanese even then.



>Elektra's left ear in the top panel




>that last panel

And speaking of plot threads that go nowhere...

So THAT'S why she doesn't breast feed.

Well she canon gets powers later on so maybe they started to get activated then?

And I won't be able to fit the other half of this in this topic, so I'll leave it here tonight. See yu Anons then.


>Civil War 2


Also, wolverine bringing the bantz

A good rule of thumb is "Does he look kinda like Vincent Price?"

>But everything's different now

Danny knows about Misty running H4H as a Pro-Reg group, right?

I kinda like pupiless Luke, even if it doesn't make a lick of sense.

You know, Bendis gets a lot of crap for how he portrays Stephen, but this shit was great.

It's two men,doing what they do best, in an area where Bendis isn't totally awful.

I think one of the biggest problems The Hand has is that they don't really have any long-lasting members or leaders. The Gorgon is the only consistent "iconic" villain they have, and Fox has the rights to him.

Bendis created a huge plot hole here.
Over in Mighty Avengers, the Ultron story was stated to be their very first mission with this roster, in fact that Tony had only recruited Ares a few hours before.
Yet this story clearly has to take place before the Mighty Avengers story, since we see the electrical storms later as a plot point.

Silver Samurai is still dead, right?

>We didn't know you two had a thing
Yet another example of characters being ignorant of things you'd think they would know.

Remember, Bendis WRITES Mighty Avengers, so he'd fucking know that better than anyone else.

Man, what is with that frilly bit on Electra's costume? Did she need to buy an emergency replacement from a figure skating store or something?

Really, her entire pelvis should be shattered by a kick like that.

Again, she should probably not be talking right now, unless it's about how she'll never walk again.

Okay, I find it impossible to read Silver Samurai yelling at these people to go away not in Dr. Tran's voice.

Man, exiling Jessica to Toronto sure lasted.

Luke is probably the only person in that room to have never died.

Because you DID see it, ages ago, in Power Man & Iron Fist.

i didn't like the cover, but i am enjoying this art - especially the play of light scraping through the black

>it's a "Bendis writes Scarlet Witch" issue

Even better:

>it's a "Bendis writes Scarlet Witch" issue and makes Clint appear as a bit of an asshole.

But to be honest, it's not all that out of character, and he probably was full PTSD and it was Wanda who wanted him and it was retcon into doombot.

I like it. It's kinda dirty, but I feel them certainly realistical. They guys are not very idealized, which is nice, for a change. It's not much cartoonish, either. I must admit I like this Clint: even if he seems a bit like the mature regular guy, he's still a rather hot/handsome regular guy even if he has an awful haircut and needs to shave his face soon. And his Matt is definitely handsome.

The third panel... that arm and that shoulder, are soooo wrong placed. Some anons say the artist trace, but I somehow doubt he does so most of the times. He may take a lot of references with faces, but I doubt he does the same with bodies.

Well let's go one-by-one
Hawkeye, at the very least, died in Avengerd Dissassembled.
Logan was killed at the start of Enemy of the State and brought back with Hand Magic, and if that doesn't count, he died when Horde ripped his heart out.
Peter died during The Other, and revived from the dead with new powers.
Doctor Strange killed himself after fighting Shuma-Gorath, but was brought back by Kaluu and the rest of his allies.
Then we have the characters who the stories made LOOK like they died, but were later retconned to having never actually died.
Jessica Drew "died" in the last issue of her solo fighting Morgan Le Fey (funny how the Doctor Doom and Iron Man go to Camelot story seems to be the only marvel bit of continuity he shows any respect for, and Morgan Le Fay, one of the major villains of that story, had a long history with one of what seems to be his favorite characters, and he never uses it), but it was later revealed that Morgan just cast a spell separating her astral body from her physical body, preventing her from re-merging, and she just ASSUMED that meant she was dead.
Danny also "died" in the last issue of Power Man & Iron Fist, beaten to death by a super-powered child in his sleep, but it was later revealed that Danny was replaced with a fake and the real him was trapped in K'un Lun.
Luke Cage on the other hand? Closest he's gotten to actually dying was the time he was near-death after a massive explosion, and Danny used the Iron Fist to save him (which then put HIM near death, and required donating life energy from Luke, Colleen, Misty, and the third second White Tiger, who had the hots for Danny), or that time some criminals captured him and faked his death (but it was in Luke's own series, and the next issue revealed

So Wanda would be blamed and not Chthon?
Bendis wanted all the shit to be on Wanda's plate.

This is such a bastardisation of Wanda and Clint's relationship.

Bendis literally destroyed it there times (Disassembled, HoM, this).

Really, it ought to be Strange.
Who people ought to believe about Clint. Clint quit the Defenders like 3 times! That's more times than Clint quit any team that wasn't the Avengers!

If Clint REALLY wanted to stick it to Stark, he would have become Goliath again. That way he'd be reminding him of Bill Foster in every fight.

>Not being mentally strong enough to meditate out mind control

Man, that mind meld he did with Colleen that left her able to cure herself of heroin addiction really shows how hax Danny's kung fu level is.