The Marines are advertising on Cred Forums

Most Marines don't go into the Marines as champions. Most are losers joining as a last resort, often as an alternative to suicide.

Whether or not the program helps these imdividuals better themselves is up for debate. I would say no, but that's a conclusion of observation and not of participation.

youtu.be/Hgd2F2QNfEE

Can't be worse than women.

Marine drill instructors take pride in turning fatbodies and lanklets into "the best armed forces america has to offer".

It is for the cyber-shitposting army

this^ literally every marine that comes back from their service can't get back into society and then people remember how autistic they were when they were younger

Welcome to my life as a 17C, Cyber Operations Specialist we are looking for people that do nothing but sit on sites like Cred Forums.

I LITERALLY brief majors and CSMs on Memes, Pepe the alt right and it's impact on the elections weekly.

OHHHHHHHH!

>select all the images with pick-up trucks

We can't all have adblock, you dumb google. Someone still has to swallow the ads to keep the internet profitable. God bless the retards with no adblock.

Where do I sign up?

I worked with an ex-marine. The faggot served like 30 years earlier and still wouldn't shut up about them. When he found out I was ex-military he fucking latched on. But he was a weak peace of shit, I didn't want anything to do with him.

In short, yes, NEETs would make good marines.

I bet you're the kind of guy that would fuck a person in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach-around. I'll be watching you.

...

Get a 110 GT on the ASVAB, be able to get a top secret and go to your recruiter.

I usually access the threat levels and activities of groups on the internet. If something happens then I provide evidence.

Don't worry Cred Forums. I always say your threat level is low and surprisingly there hasn't been any cyber attacks from the alt-right.

There are marine bronies and shit. You watch any recent army documentary where you see the average recent deployed in army or Marines 75% of them are the kids that were picked on their entire lives.

I actually turn it off on this site. Why not give chink moot a couple shekels? This is one of the last bastions of free speech.

>Get a 110 GT on the ASVAB, be able to get a top secret and go to your recruiter.
>top secret memes
This keeps getting better.

I think I have a 130 GT, but I'm leashed to the Army Guard. How can I escape to go meme it up for America?

They know that a real war is coming and they are lowering their standards to fill ranks with trained fodder.

If Clonton wins, it's war. If they think Trump will win, it's war.

Hmmm sounds easy, how do?

YOU PIECE OF SHIT I ALMOST DROPPED MY GLASS OF WATER ONTO MY LAPTOP

That's it.

This place done.

Government agencies are advertising here, it's officially over.

Expect your ISP to surrender your browsing history and have even your name tied to it.

Wait until your contract is up and you go to a stay guard assembly.

You'll be able to sign up for it. Not sure what it would be like in the national guard. Active it's all day lurking, fuck they even have Japanese guys lurking Japanese message boards.

I would totally serve if I could get us citizenship.

like 75% of marine jobs aren't direct combat roles

Sorry to break it to you, but we know who everyone is on every site that goes through an ISP. Except for the dark net. Unless it's a honeypot and run by the Gov. Which 80% of the visible sites are now.

Enjoy.

...

Plenty of Marines post on here, it's almost as retarded as the actual Marine Corps

t. 0341

Did your mother have any children that lived?

Marines are mostly there to eat lead so the important forces don't lose manpower so it's not a big leap.

I was a complete NEET and was about to join the marines, but then my buddy convinced me to go army reserves. Met a handful of autistic spergs who post on Cred Forums and barely got past basic

Is this a warning? If we're not in the military before this site gets shut down, we'll be executed?

US marines under mortar attack crying and screaming for god
m.youtube.com/watch?v=NE1l4-vo8I4

British regular infantry under mortar attack for comparison
m.youtube.com/watch?v=gW4AOknNLn0

This actually. I respect soldiers, but most of the ones I know were/are total losers. Their doing an important job, but a lot of the time it's because they're overcompensating. I'm sure they also want to fight for the country and stuff, but you'd be surprised at how nerdy and autistic the military is.

Fucking KEK

ex-spy here, agencies require patriotic teens for future agents.

There is some patriotism here, filled up with crazyness and morbid sadism. They are failing advertising here

What sort of sorcery is this?

>ex-spy
>Peru
Yeah, right.

This

I've been a marine since 2004, before I signed up I had been homeless for 6 months. I was really gathering the courage to kill myself when a woman who was also part of our homeless " community" told me if I was so set on dying try joining the army. Her reasoning was that if I didnt get killed I would have a decent career and things would turn around. She died of an overdose about 3 weeks later and that gave me the final push I needed to do something.

I signed up for the marines and haven't looked back, I should just have killed myself if im going to be honest with you.

HOW

Nah, we all get handed cushy fashy jobs and a state provided wife.

>american people are subsidizing my designated shitting board
neat

???

ex-president here, offices require patriotic women for future presidents.

I turned mine off because this tweet

twitter.com/Cred Forums/status/777887193742188544

Go to bed Bill, you look like shit lately.

>implying body pillows aren't encouraged by the sgts to reduce spread of the clap

its probably a troll from /k/

This website has ads?

I turn my adblocking off in Cred Forums, their ads aren't intrusive at all.

How old are you, m8

ive never seen one

Makes perfect sense to me.

Service Guarantees Citizenship!

>WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW MORE?

Wtf I'm on mobile and it still worked

I mentioned Cred Forums at least a couple times to my recruiter a couple years ago. I think he was on at least one enlistment general on /k/ to give advice.

They probably shill on Reddit and neogaf and shit too, don't feel too special.

There really is no better place to find sad directionless people with no future who would be willing to die if it gave them purpose.

The only other 4channers I met IRL were in the Navy, a buddy who introduced me to the site (fuck you Voss I'm now here forever), and a Marine who told me he would post dick pics on Cred Forums.

The sound is not in the fig.

Corpsman here. Most marines are straight out of highschool.

>Military realizes a site full of angry unemployed disenfranchised males is full of potential recruits
Makes sense

KEK. Marines think they are relevant in 21st century warfare. They should send their grunts here and train.

I already enlisted. I go to validation tomorrow.
I was actually supposed to ship this past monday, but I let another future marine go instead because his greencard was going to expire.

old enough to party.

Future marine leaving in a month and graduated high school in june here to confirm.

us army infantry and airborne>us marines

tbqh

>why are all the psychos joining the marines?

Teacher last week of senior year when I told him one of my close friends was enlisting.

>wanted to join marines since young age for brotherhood and shweet ass pay and benefits and job training
>in 11th grade my best friend/little brother dies
>get diagnosed and treated for depression
>as a result I can never join the military

maybe it worked out for the best, apparently the military has become extremely pozzed under king google

RIP Charlie, pic related is what he wore on the last day of school he went to, to give you an idea of why we were practically gay for each other. He went to a 40% google school kek

(you)

>He went to a 40% google school kek
reminds me of that episode of Oz.

How did he die?

hey guys

eternal bleeding.

They are advertising to get people trained early, after Hillary gets elected most 18-25 yr old burgers are gonna get drafted into service to fight on her behlaf when she instigates a war with Russia

God I can't wait to see all those liberal googlefaggots that voted for her get asscancer when they learn they are gonna have to dodge draft because of their poor choices

I was actually going to go Navy so I can get a Chief A boiler license.

it was a rare enough death that given his first name and the rest of my post you could pretty easily identify me

it wasn't murder or manslaughter if that's what you're asking

>get paid to shitpost on a malaysian marmalade making board
i want this to be real

Most Marines are NEET bronies before they go in. The ones that aren't are psychopaths and end up in infantry MOSes.

Did you tell the recruiter that you were diagnosed with depression?

They never go back and check your medical records unless they have strong cause to believe you concealed something. They only know what you tell your sergeant and bring documentation of to MEPS.

Trust me dude, I spent almost a year getting an old case of insomnia dismissed. Every recruiter at the station gave me shit for even mentioning it.

If you're still taking depression meds, you probably shouldn't mess with the military, but if you're certain that it was just a situational diagnosis, keep it to yourself and remember that "no" stands for "new opportunities".

Because we love America here. Commies have always been the enemy, everybody knows this.

whoa whoa whoa son where do I sign up for this?

I didn't know being a self-righteous welfare queen and mercenary for Mossad was so important.

so dont fucking tell meps about being diagnosed with depression you dip

They were quite obsessed with getting this NEET to join.
Anyways, October is when the budget goes out so they're planning ahead with advertising now, which is a good strategy, not like we'll have anything to do once they nuke Cred Forums anyway.
Assuming they can afford all the people who are going to flood them after this signaling, that is.

Shit that made me laugh. Jesus Christ why is that so funny. Fuck you man

How the fuck does this work on mobile but I can't fucking play webms?

It is

Everyone is chasing Chinese and Russians around now anyway. Anonymous is almost all flipped FBI so hackers stay away. It's dead.

Go to the Army Recruiter

It's a pretty lulzy job. On Monday I'm going to have to brief my Captain on the Cred Forums operation to change slurs to Google with out laughing.

...

fugg maybe I could have joined

Cred Forums is a board of peace
Even if an attack were to come from ((("the alt-right"))), #notall/pol/
I'm actually surprised (((they))) haven't done a false flag under the label they've created to pin on us yet.

>haxors
you really think anyone with any ability to pentest or manipulate networks would spend their time here rotting their brains?

That stuff is the job of Cryptologic Network Warfare Specialist (35Q) or specifically the contractors they work for.

Doctors said I had Aspergers
No severe autism
I was going to tell my recruiter
I went to a neurologist within this year who told me I was fine besides it affecting me socially
So do I just forgo telling them?
Don't they do security clearances?

A lot of men's formational hardships don't come from drill sergeants yelling at them, but from life experience in the "civilian world".

W-whoa
Fucking tell us google

SEND ME MORE INFO

[email protected]

>the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach-around

It's ok if you can't reach the prostate. Don't worry about it.

My job isn't to manipulate networks or catch people that Hack I just lurk and report.

It's literally in the job description.

>Cyber intelligence, surveillance and reconnaissance actions on specified systems and networks

You have to do a lot of interacting with people in the military, dude. Even in the chair force, you have to report to your CO and shit.

Security clearances never go into medical backgrounds. They're looking for security-related items, as the name implies. That means interactions with foreign nationals, credit history, legal history, family connections with organized crime or foreign governments. Not whether your dad thought you were gay when you were 13.

If you really think you can deal with near constant human interaction for a while, I say go for it, bro. Just don't fuck anyone else's shit up.

Already have that shit. 35F hooah

>Status report: Thursday, September 22nd, 2016 Issued 20:46:45 CST
>OPs are continuing to be identified as faggots across the board. The Fag Mafia's hold on Cred Forums shows no end in sight. Buttplundering is rampant, and estimated HIV infection rates are reaching quadruple digit levels. Be advised.

I don't have speaking problems. I just have trouble with friendships and intimacy.

I used to do public speaking and act as a representative before. If they won't look at my medical history I'll be completely solid. I am not an emotional person so it clashes with regular people always asking me why I'm serious or not laughing at their jokes.

Thanks then. I will keep it to myself. If I get DDed I'll make sure to come back here and post about it.

peacetime enlisters are the absolute trash of society

>126 GT as an idiot kid
>over 100 on the DLAB
>miss out on security clearance and chance at 35M, reclass to 88M
>level 4 discharge after reaching my duty station

Wew lad

Get at me CIA