I live in a swing state. My gut feeling is to vote for Trump, but I am also very bad with women and very lonely

I live in a swing state. My gut feeling is to vote for Trump, but I am also very bad with women and very lonely.

I am offering my vote to whoever has sex with me. If there are any hot Hillary supporters out there reading this, if you fuck me I will vote for Hillary instead of Trump. Nothing crazy. I just want to have sex in the missionary position and cuddle a bit afterwards and feel like someone loves me.

Same goes for any hot Trump girls. I'll vote for Trump and not Hillary if you have sex with me.

Let the games begin.

>inb4 hurrrrr traitor cuck libtard
America is fucked no matter who becomes president. I don't care. Let it all burn. I just don't want Western civilization to collapse with me never truly having felt loved.

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fuck dude if ur this desperate you should make a tulpa and learn to lucid dream so u can fuck all the time u catch my drift nigga

Kek. You actually think your vote is worth anything? Fucking pathetic.

You're a madman.

youtube.com/watch?v=qpbhskx56G8

lmao

nobody will fuck you for a vote

ill fuck your ass and send you home cryin, after i make u vote trump of course.

>being this cucked

Learn this dance and you can bed any Russian chick you want

It's not just about fucking. I'm not a virgin. I've had girlfriends in the past. But all of them ended up leaving me, two of them cheated on me. I've never felt loved in my entire life. That's why I just want to have sex and for the girl to pretend like she loves me afterwards. Because all of my relationships ended with the girl telling me she doesn't love me anymore, or in one case that she never did, and it always hurts me.

Anyways, still waiting for any takers. If I don't get any I think I'll probably just kill myself after the election is over.

Seriously? Is it proven to work?

You sure about that? I distinctly remember a while back some Bernie-supporting college whores were offering to fuck people over Tinder if they voted for Bernie or donated to his campaign. I should have hopped on that when I had the chance but I didn't. Won't make that mistake again.

CRINGE THREAD?

Or, you could just kill yourself for being a pathetic human. Ok?

is your life really that bad? If you wanna take the smith and wesson retirement plan that's fine but at least think about it.

>pathetic human
Kek. Okay Sven, might want to take a look in the mirror. Or out the window at your cucked country.
I am thinking about it. The solution is to trick myself into thinking someone loves me even for a night.

hey don't throw stones man

we still have to exterminate the brown people before we can call anyone else cucked

Kek'd. Claiming us to be cucks when you sit here and posts a cringe thread like this..

>average_undecided_voter.inf

What are prostitutes
>inb4 illegal
just go to Nevada, Mexico, or Canada and keep your self respect. Or better yet get an escort so they actually have to spend time with you before they fuck and you can imagine someone wants to be around you.
>Protip: prostitutes are better actors than shills, so tip them extra and ask them to cuddle with you afterwards and pretend they care about you.

No ones ever gonna love you in some magically healing way, people will always disappoint you - happiness will only ever come from with in not from another person.

But if you're gonna kill yourself do it in a comical way please.

Big bird jumps off a building.

I'll fuck you in the ass for free

100% fail proof my friend, they say you can't bed a chick merely by dancing but they haven't learned such moves friend

Don't wait. Go kill yourself NOW.

I was thinking of just putting a plastic bag over my head and filling it with some kind of noxious gas, and then leaving a note that just says "when the Zyklon B hits you hard"

>If there are any hot Hillary supporters
There aren't any. Also, you should fuck an ugly Hillary supporter, and just say you're voting for Hillary and vote for Trump instead.

Couldn't you just promise them to vote for Hill and then get to the ballot and vote Trump

Why not just tell David Brock that you're planning to vote for Trump and that you're the thought leader of the alt-right and the hacker known as Cred Forums.

if you "pay" for it you're not gonna believe it anyway, join the army, exercise should help with your depression and good thing is they will force you to do it so you don't have to force yourself, you become alpha and find some girl and if not you can always kill yourself and if you do it right you even become a hero, what's not to love?

Too old to join the military. And they wouldn't take me anyways, I tried already. I have a really bad knee from a sports accident in high school and only have one testicle because of testicular cancer. Both of these disqualify me. Learning of that was the first time I contemplated suicide but it certainly wasn't the last.
Huh. I suppose I could just do that.