TF2 Merc domination lines over overwatch heros

This is some club penguin tier humor

You're pretty good.

the more I play overwatch the more it makes me want to play TF2.

"Tiny baby lasers can't outsmart bullet"
"Who sent all these girls to fight me?"

>tfw TF2 will never be good again
>tfw TF2 lost 20k players to a clunky overwatch rip off
ITS NOT FAIR

I heard it all in their voices what the hell

>pyro complaining about how road hog can speak clearly while he can barley get anyone to understand what he says

You first faggot.

>IN MY DAY WE HAD TO SHOOT AT OUR FEET TO FLY LIKE THAT
>SWISS NEUTRALITY IS NO MATCH FOR AMERICAN FREEDOM
>OLD SOLDIERS NEVER DIE, THEY GET DOMINATED
>I AM AN EXPERIENCED KILLER OF BOTH ROBOTS AND HIPPIES. YOU JUST MET YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE
>THE ONLY MUSIC WELCOME ON THE BATTLEFIELD ARE WAR BUGLES, EXPLOSIONS AND SCREAMING

At least post all of them from the last thread OP

>>CAN'T JUMP BACK IN TIME WITHOUT A HEAD NOW, CAN YA MISSY?
>Not CAN'T DO YOUR TIME VIDEO CRAP WITH NO BRAIN, CAN YA?

We had a last thread?

They got posted at the end of a TF2 thread just before it got archived.

>baby German man needs suit to fight little robots
>who needs a hammer when there is sasha

What the fuck is this autism?

Having fun with a character's personality.

Why do you hate fun characters user?

>maybe you should have brought your 6 friends with ya
>(when using the gunslinger) How about you use a gun your size

>YER A DAMN BLOODY DISGRACE, LADDY. YA STILL GOT BOTH O' YER EYEBALLS!

>tfw no TF2 vs Overwatch crossover
What would the Overwatch characters say?

>what makes me a good demoman? At least 'a still have me bloody limbs!

I don't play Overwatch, so can't really say. But I think there's a lot of potential with their voice lines

>How can you be a bloody demoman if ye got a bear trap?
> an Aussie copycat is no match for a Scottish demoman

>Vive la révolution! Ha!
>Yippie kay yay!

>ohh yea real scary there, soo intimidatin dacing like a balarena shooting at nothing!

>I guess none a y'all are heroes then, what witchu dying and all that.
>Those are some cute lil' sentries. Get enough of 'em and you might be able to toast some bread.
>A sentry's got no business thinkin' fer itself.
>That cute lil' bird of yours is gonna fry up real good.
>Why don'tcha leave the sentry buildin' to a real engineer?
>I ain't one fer monkeyin' around.
>That's how a real Texan does it!
>Maybe someone shoulda oughta programmed you to fight a lil' more and preach a lil' less.

>LOOK AT YE, WIT YE BLOODY PEGLEG. YE LOOK LIKE A BLOODY PIRATE. AH HAHAHA... eh..

Saving this later for Nate
Post more Scout Lines

>LET'S SEE YOU SCREW YOUR WAY OUTTA THAT ATTACK!

>you kill your targets from far away? you are a disgrace to France.
> Spiders have nothing on a good old crab madam

>Maybe someone shoulda oughta programmed you to fight a lil' more and preach a lil' less.
OH SNAP

dumb marisafag

>RIGHT IN THE PENAL ZONE

>i can hit a clean strike off your head amelia flyfart

>Those are some cute lil' sentries. Get enough of 'em and you might be able to toast some bread.

this is beautiful

>YOU COMMIE STATES ARE ALL THE SAME, COLD, RED, AND DEAD
>YOU MAY HAVE ESCAPED AMERICA'S BOOT, AMIGO, BUT YOU COULD NOT ESCAPE MINE
>NICE TRY CROISSANT, BUT I COULD SEE YOUR WHITE FLAG FROM A MILE AWAY

The overwatch heroes are so bland you cannot think of any good lines for them.
Prove me wrong.
You can't

>Call a fun thread autistic because isn't a console war thread, bait thread, shitpost thread, weeb shit thread or off topic thread

CHEERS LUV! THE CALVARY'SHERE XD

>AN' I BET YE' AIN'T EVEN DRUNK

This would be hilarious if you were using the bootlegger
>Maybe you should stop teleporting and try to aim
>I've always freakin'' hated girlscouts
>Yo dj, I think it's time to put on the funeral beat
>Did you seriously just try to kill me with a subwoofer?
>*hums the terminator theme after killing a Bastion*

>AND 'ERE I THOUGHT I WAS DONE HUNTAN ANIMALS FOR SPORT
>'course a bloody woman needs eight eyes to shoot straight

>YOU SURE DID JUST DIE DIE DIED! HAH AHAHAHA!
>OH PLEASE, HAVE MERCY ON MY SOUL!

>YE LOOK LIKE A BLOODY PIRATE. AH HAHAHA... eh..

>'course a bloody woman needs eight eyes to shoot straight

>aiming is overrated, like that hat of yours

>Justice Rai- AHHhhh

>Another doctor huh? A hundred doctors can't save my cursed soul, what makes you think you're any different

>CUTE JETPACK, LADY. DOES IT COME IN MEN'S?
>WHAT'S WRONG, MA'AM? ROCKET JUMPING NOT DAINTY ENOUGH FOR YOU?
>WHAT'S WRONG, CUPCAKE? SCARED YOU'LL BREAK A NAIL?
>TAKE OFF THOSE TRAINING WHEELS AND FIGHT ME LIKE A MAN
>YOUR FLIMSLY JETPACK IS NO MATCH FOR GOOD OL' AMERICAN ROCKET JUMPING
>GLIDE AROUND ALL YOU WANT, LADY, YOU'RE NOTHING BUT TARGET PRACTICE
>THE ONLY THINGS RAINING FROM ABOVE ARE BLOOD GIBLETS

Soldier would shit on Pharah so much for relying on a jetpack to get around.

>Cue Medic's best rape face.

It's honestly kind of hard.

I just like how even though for the ones with no reference to the character, we can still understand who is saying it

...

>shooting the floor to fly? how primitive
> i'll give you a real rocket jump old man

>course a bloody woman needs eight eyes to shoot straight
Oh fuck that's amazing

...

>Self-inflicted wounds? You're a sad excuse for a soldier.

We need to get Nate/the sfm va's to voice these

"ITS IN THE REFRIDGERATOR"

>'course a bloody woman needs eight eyes to shoot straight

>isn't a console war thread

Bitch please is pretty much the same

>TF2 fags butthurt that his game is not that popular starts make fun of another popular game of the same genre
>extra dumb point for making shitty

kek you people are in the same level as the retards that make the battleborn character dialog

>medic wouldent love to study reaper to find out how mercy made him, touturing him in the most brutal fassons possible

...

>rubberfruit

>woo sure is fun eating my own shit
wtf thats disgusting
>wow whats wrong with you you must be autistic if you dont think this is fun

> I can bring back the dead and you can't make ribs grow back?
> Is the little pretend doctor mad he cant fly?

>'course a bloody woman needs eight eyes to shoot straight
ebin

and implanting uteruses into him

this thread just got NAUGHTY

>NEED A DISPENSER HERE! WHAT D'YA MEAN YOU DON'T GOT ONE OF THOSE?
>WHY DON'T YOU CRY TO YOUR UNCLE HEAVY IF YOU DON'T LIKE ME PICKING ON YOU?
>Hope that don't hurt my chances to score a date with ya...
>YA FALL OUT OF HEAVEN GIRL? 'CUZ I'M FEELING PRETTY DIVINE

Demo-chan

y u leeb us?

...

>that zenyatta line
actually fucking got me, holy shit

>How about I examine 'zis "cursed soul" of yourz?
>You are certainly an interesting patient

There's already lines in the game that would work perfect for this.
>Aww, there's another angel in heaven... IN HELL!

>They can bury you in the tomb of the unskilled soldier!

Fuck, I miss when TF2 comics and videos came out on a regular basis.

Let's be honest though. It's a lot better than when it went through that pony phase

that just sad lad

listen here asshole
there aren't many options
the is a fucking Korean bitch in a mech and its hard to come up with insult they haven't already made to each other
how about you try faggot

vocaroo.com/i/s1d6ETQUtZuI

"Not much of a quickdraw ARE you, "pardner"?"

>I'VE FOUGHT IN REAL WARS, SON! THAT I STARTED! AND ENDED!
>YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE ANY MEDALS DO YOU PAL?
>YOU ARE NOT A SOLDIER! YOU ARE A CIVILIAN PLAYING DRESS-UP!

Junkrat, Roadhog, Toblerone, maybe Reaper, maybe McCree, and very arguably D.Va are the only ones who could potentially have great domination lines. Honestly, seems like the ability to have humorous dialogue is proportionate to your ability to be an asshole.

>*uses the Quickfix* I CAN, AND I'M NOT SURE I LIKE IT

>*action*
hey underage this is s a 18+ site, get the fuck out

>Even a girl builds teleports better than you!

>I AM AN EXPERIENCED KILLER OF BOTH ROBOTS AND HIPPIES. YOU JUST MET YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE
Ok, this one got me, nice job user.

>Maybe try bringing three pistols
>Oh no please, tell me how your katana lost to a bat
>Yo those venom mines come out in the wash...Right?

>Better.
>When they're very big, obvious, and uses her ult.

>You're not a soldier, you're a civilian playing dressup.
How ironic.
Are the only medals you've "earned" purple hearts?

Not to mention how the entire team knows she made it and is reminded of it every ten seconds

>TF2 Mercenaries all have more personality alone than the entire cast of Overwatch
>Even the Pyro
>Meanwhile Overwatch characters are just archetypes from Pixar movies

sad

That's because Torbjorn doesn't build them at all

>he doc, you think i could get a limb from that failure pile of yours
> Buying ammo? that's for babies
> I've got my eye on you drunkoman
>thats all i could think of

I feel like Pyro would be terrified of Mei. Just imagine what someone shooting ice must look like in Pyroland

>Heavy punch men,heavy punch scout, heavy punch bears, but heavy has never punched monkey

>Ya got dat big hammer and I just killed ya wit a bat. Dat's embarrassin'
>Dat big hook a yours ain't so tough when I'm outrunnin' it. Right, porkchop?
>Come back again n' maybe I'll use dat bird a yours for target practice!
>Dhere ain't a timeline where ya not bein dominated by me!
>Ooh, sorry dhere buddy. I was aimin' for one a the balls around ya neck!
>Killin' you was just a warmup!
>Dat fancy shield a yours ain't so good at stopping bats now ain't it?
>Not so tough outside ya fancy robot suit, are ya?

user you dummy, she'd be shooting giant wads of ice cream. Any time she puts up a wall, it's like a mountain of Vanilla or Chocolate or Mint or something.

>Heavy punch men,heavy punch scout,
Kek

>Meanwhile Overwatch characters are just archetypes from Pixar movies
pixar movies have better character

see, these are quality banter

Okay time for Dante Must Die:
Overwatch hero responds to being Jarated

>You're not even the fattest pig I've killed today.
>Two good eyes, but still from an island of drunken buffoons
>you may be useless, but at least you don't keep your piss in a jar
>You call that MUSIC?
>Is that all? I've stabbed men who fly via explosion!
>I prefer to stab people with MY icicles
>ICE to meet you! HAH!
>You cowboys have no idea how to use a gun
>Your hat looks ridiculous.
>You are an embarrassment to The Republic
>Herr Doktor, I didn't know you had such... proclivities! Oh, my mistake, I mistook you for another quack.
>If you teamed up with the demoman, you might actually be able to see me coming!
>I didn't think it was possible for someone to be more irritating than the scout, but here you are.
>You call that a knife? THIS is a knife!
>I can't tell which is dumber: you, or your hammer
>A front-facing shield, what a brilliant idea!
>You need two guns? How barbaric.
>You're the perfect height for STABBING!
>You should have stayed dead, old man/old woman
>THIS is for making me dress up like a woman
>They should call you the man from U.G.L.Y.!

>and I just killed ya wit a bat

none of the domination lines reference a specific weapon though

you aren't?

>Ice
>Beating fire
What is this, Dragon's Dogma?

Lots of scout's domination lines mention his bat

>"My Bat's still dry. No clumps of hair, Nuttin!"

>Walkin' 'round like THAT only makes it easier ta' put one right between ya norks!

Figure out what norks means without googling

>A front-facing shield, what a brilliant idea!

>tfw Mei will never kiss you and then end your fucking life
please

North Koreans?

ah but Blizzard must be a safe space! No cheeky banter lines senpai!

boobs

>France loses one of it's finest, me! as I slip away, au revoir!

>>'course a bloody woman needs eight eyes to shoot straight

Forgot how autistic TF2 was.
And those SFM shorts, fucking hell

I think not enough of overwatch's cast is "mean" enough to sound right with Tf2's dialogue.

The mercenaries can get pretty insulting without even having to curse.

But those lines are seriously lame as hell

>said after killing someone directly with the bat

I know what that means and Demo saying that he will hit someone with a grenade between the boobs is fucking hilarious

It's Sniper vs Widowmaker but that's pretty funny too

Soldier to Soldier
>Back to bootcamp, son
>untrained and unhinged
>home made medals don't make you a hero

Mercy to Medic
>such a gross misuse of medicine
>have you forgotten your oath?
>another unfortunate case of malpractice

Reaper to Spy
>I disappear too...except I come back...heh heh heh...
>your watch couldn't tell you how much time you had left...
>heh...even the cowboy could be stealthier

I tried. I really like OW but as it stands their characters are a little flat. TF2 ones are a lot more fun to write too.

And have limited uses

Yeah those fancy duel wields ain't doing you any good are they?

How about you go backwards some more, so I can beat you with my bat again

Look at you, I mean just look at you can't even kill me and you have two guns

>food analogies

>>your watch couldn't tell you how much time you had left...
This one is pretty good

>We will never get a collab between OW and TF2 with real voice lines in this universe

>No one can hide from my-"
>Player Widowmaker left the game (VAC banned from secure server)

>incredible, with all the wonders of technology you can only revive the dead.
>Your painful immortality was an accident? *snort*
>Yes patience and harmony right right, now please sign this death certificate

>Hey, my contract reads: no watersports!

Even if we did, the best lines wouldn't make it because they would trigger the fuck out of SJW's

Widowmaker is easy.
>MON DIEU

kek'd

>oh for the love of. . . IT GOT ON MY BANANAS TOO?

>lemonade wont stop death

>AGH ITS IN MY BEARD

>when sniper hits mei with it
>looks like we got some yellow snow here lads!

>'course a bloody woman needs eight eyes to shoot straight

How funny would it be if Reaper would squeal when hit with it
Also,
>oi mate, is dat piss? 'das bloody brilliant!

>soldier is literally a civilian

Hypocritical spoon faced loonie

>"Need a second opinion?" - Mercy to Medic
>"I am the new Motherland!" - Zarya to Heavy
>" 'Shame about that..." - Engineer to Bastion
>"Du seid der untermensch!" - Rein to Medic

>only an idiot name his gun
> lets see how strong that hard hat is
> flying away won't stop me from killing you, ask pharah. oh wait
> even here Germans still rely on the Russians to do work huh

>looks like we got some yellow snow here lads!
Why did I find this funny

>Half are just him riooing on the tf2 cast
Perfect

Why dontcha quit buildin teleporters and build yerself a GPS to find where the toilet is, darlin

>>lemonade wont stop death
Top kek

>SOMEBODY WANNA TELL BOBO'S TRAINER HE GOT OUTTA HIS PEN?
>LEAST I DON'T GOTTA WAIT FOR AN ULT TO BUILD A TELE
>GOTCHA, PORKPIE!
>GOTCHA, BLUEJAY!
>LOOKS LIKE I SHOT FIRST, HOSS!
>SENTRY DOWN! YOUR SENTRY, THAT IS!

>i said PASS!

>TF2 = Banter
>Overwatch = shit """""HUMOUR""""""

what went wrong?

>hey speedy, why not sit a spell?
>runnin off already? i didn't even get to say hi
>i'm down a leg and i still blew you away. how about that?
>aw watch where yer runnin mate, you tripped on one of me 'nades

>pull up that helmet, son, you might see it comin next time
>jump this, uncle sam
>so ye don't like demomen, huh? well here's what i think about that
>boy, and they say i have a few screws loose

>thanks for lightin the fuse, mumbles
>oh honey, you set me heart on fire
>your compression blast is nice, but i think that really blew you away
>the freak show's already left town? i'm so disappointed!

...

>Gross, it got in my mask...
>Hey! Not Cool!
>BEEP BWOWWOWWWOWW

>Overwatch.
>Interesting characters.

>we will never get a cross update between tf2 and overwatch that adds skins, hats, and weapons from both games

Junkrat and roadhog would probably respond to it as if jarate is an australian thing to do

>I ain't never seen a sentry that walks. Course I ain't seen one so useless before, neither.

>where the toilet is

>They should call you the man from U.G.L.Y.!
kek

>I would rather be hit by a molotov
>Harmony is not going to get me through this

I gotta admit, some of these are funny, but we need Overwatch hero domination lines over TF2 classes in the interest of fairness.

This makes me wonder about engie and McCree interactions

>"We both use an aimbot, I just don't need three seconds for mine, son."

>"A real cowboy outta gunsling for themselves."

>WHOLE LOTTA GOOD THAT FANCY VISOR A YERS CAN DO IF IT CANNAE EVEN HELP YE KILL A DRUNK MAN STUMBLIN' AROUND
>AH BETTER BE CAREFUL AROUND YOU YE JIGGLING MESS, AH DINNAE WANNAE IGNITE ALL THAT PETROL YE BEEN GUZZLIN
>QUIT YE BLOODY TELEPORTIN' AROUND YE MAKIN' ME SEE DOUBLE
>THEY PUT YE TOGETHER ONCE BEFORE AND THEY CAN DO IT AGAIN
>AM I SEEIN' THINGS OR DID THAT SENTRY JUST GET UP AND START WALKIN' AROUND?

I can't stop laughing, this one is great.

>Overwatch hero domination lines

That doesn't exist to begin with, though. They might make a cheesy one-liner if they kill someone specific but they don't have actual banter in the slightest

>This is why I left home.

>thinking only kids do the *action* thing

The only person confirmed for being underage is yourself, sadly enough.

thanks for reminding me of AOL chatrooms you sick fuck

>AHAH Piss in a bottle, Classic!
>This is why I wear the mask

>Death comes... For YOU! AHAHAHA

>AM I SEEIN' THINGS OR DID THAT SENTRY JUST GET UP AND START WALKIN' AROUND?
Oh god that's brilliant
>demo sees a Bastion
>freaks out in sheer confusion
>"Engy wat de bloody hell didja build now"

Overwatch is financed by UN to push propaganda of wacky fun, multicultural group that has fun all over the world.

Yeah, well, I'm sure if I had an Iron Man Chest piece thingy and pointless ski goggles, I bet I could teleport through time too!

>ICE to meet you! HAH!
His uncontrollabe laughter would fit better.

I'm surprised nobody's even tried to do Hanzo yet

>I tell ya, first it was spears, then guns, and now DRAGONS!
>DOMINATED, Hiroshima!
>They got a word for DOMINATED in your language!?
>Swords cannot pierce through this red, white n' blue KILLING MACHINE, son.
>Dragons!? Big deal, Merasmus craps out worse on Taco Tuesday!
>AAARARARGHH, DO-MI-NATED you twinkle-toed automaton!
>I'm gonna kick yer ass so hard, yer ANCESTORS will feel it!
>When will you ja-PANSIES learn, you cannot stop the raging righteousness of AMERICA!

That's all I got

10/10

> this is what i lost my arm and leg for roadi
> grunts

>killing people from a mile away, thats no way an australian fights
There is some potential for banter between junkrat/roadhog and sniper

I didn't want to go too campy, but I agree.

I also wish we could use italics, because that's really the only way to convey through text the varying emphasis of Spy's speech. It's pretty easy to do soldier when all you have to do is hit capslock, in comparison.

>Dragons!? Big deal, Merasmus craps out worse on Taco Tuesday!

>352740117
>'course a bloody woman needs eight eyes to shoot straight
10/10

Sad part is, seeing how fast a skilled soldier can be at rocket jumping, he's pretty damn justified, Pharah can only stay airborne for so long and move so fast in the air.

Pharah needs a new ult where she goes full jet mode and can whizz around the arena at high speeds.

>"I'm drunk, you're crazy wanna hang out after this?"
>"I'm batshit, your off your arse wanna catch the football game this weekend?"

>If I see you again you'll Enter My Boot, Up your ass!
>You were not supposed to take the words Eastern Theatre litterally

It would be funny if there can be a way to like , test in game a tf2 VS overwatch

>"Oooh another little rat for my tezts!"
>"Thankz for the cold! Your organz are well preserved!"
>"What could I possibly do with all this scrap metal?"
>"Come here little baby, tiz time for your shot...OF ZYANIDE!"

>mfw he would hit on all the girls

What color would the overwatch team dress in?

Honestly a lot of the best lines we've come up with in the thread are the Mercs shitting on the female characters for being girl versions of themselves in some way.
>BRINGING ZEM BACK FROM ZE DEAD? PFFT, ZEY DON'T EVEN HAVE ANY HIPPOPOTAMUS INTESTINES IN ZEM
>OH GRAMMAMA, DID YOU FORGET TO TAKE YOUR MEDICINE TODAY?

>mfw he hits on Tracer because she's a female scout
>mfw reverse oedipus complex

Blue cause blue always loses.

Someone better screencap this

>Overwatch update where each character gets multiple ults
i'd play it

None, they would just have a glowing outline around them for whatever team color given to them while 2/3rds of them are wearing the summer/goth alt skins

Like mvm, red tf2 teams vs blue overwatch team

How mysterious, a toilet that shoots bullets. Oh, that was your Sentry?

While the mercs are all wearing their own thing, the Overwatch faction had blue uniforms.

>>DOMINATED, Hiroshima!

>"Je vous vois, mais pouvez-vous me voir?"

...

>Implying she knows what a toilet looks like

>HOW MANY TIMES DO WE NEED TO BLOW YOU UP BEFORE YOU TAKE A HINT?

>Never wake a sleeping giant, Hanzimmerman!
>I'd like to see your lightshow stop a ROCKET TO THE FACE!
>HOO-AH! That's 3-1, Japan!
>In my day, we didn't fight like samurai, we fought like MEN.
>I will take this sword and bury it in your conveniently slit-shaped face.
>Even the Rising Sun is eclipsed by the radiant justice of AMERICA!
>Dragons? Euhh... notetoself. StopdrinkingwithDemomanonworkdays. Onlyonweekends.

Spy wouldn't hit on Tracer, she's English. I doubt there would be anything more infuriating to Spy than a female version of scout with a hideous English accent.

>With a suit like that, you'd think it wouldn'ta hurt you as much
>Next time, try a little bit more gun, pipsqueak!
>Nah, HERE'S how the west was won! Yee-HAW!
>Put down the headphones and pick up a guitar, boy.

That didn't stop him from porking Scout's mom.

So no one made ones for sniper?
> you call yourself a bloody assassin while yelling?
> you're even more annoying then demo, and instead of one eye you have eight
> stop giving Australia a bad reputation discount joker

>Got Damn you make the robots feel pain? Hell I just leave it at point and shoot

>Pink hair? Tiny baby like you would not last minute in Gulag.
>PHAH! You are stronk, but you cannot beat me!
>Your gun does not shoot bullets!? Vhat sick contraption is this?
>Your shields cannot outsmart MY BULLETS!
>BEARS put up fight more than you, peбeнoк!

read the thread dingus, probably 1/4th of the replies are for sniper

>Why revive them when you can make them unkillable?

couldn't really catch the medic-y vibe, sorry.

>Heavy apologizes for dominating Zarya
>laughs at everyone else

>So no one made ones for sniper?
literally the first post

What makes you think she's English and not American?

you missed a few

>>HOO-AH! That's 3-1, Japan!

>"Disguising yourself as a bunch of itty bitty pieces? GENIUS!"

She's from Boston, which is England 2.0.

I don't even want to imagine what Heavy would have to say to Zarya

All of their lines together would be in Russian

But I guess I got a couple

>You remind me of sisters back home. Except uglier.
>Da, my guns are better than YOUR guns! This is fact.
>Look at your... not... so baby guns.
>You are like bear cub with water pistol!
>Defending teammates is DOKTOR'S job.
>Heavy will repaint silly haircut with your BLOOD!

didnt even realize that one, holy shit that's quality banter

wait one more
>justice can't rain. only water can, and jarate

Even in game he doesn't really have any specific domination lines, probably because you wouldn't see a Medic deliver the killing blow himself

>YOUR BERLIN WALL COULD NOT STOP MY RONALD RAYGUN
>YOUR WAR'S OVER, SAUERKRAUT
>GERMANY MAY START THE WARS BUT IT'S AMERICA THAT WINS THEM
>ALL THAT ARMOR COULD NOT SAVE YOU FROM RETIREMENT, CAPTAIN KLINK
>I AM GOING TO PUT LEDERHOSEN ON AND CHICKEN DANCE ON YOUR GRAVE, IT WILL BE EMBARRASSING FOR THE BOTH OF US
>YOUR ROCKET-POWERED BLITZKRIEG WAS NO MATCH FOR MY ROCKET-POWERED FREEDOM

...

>I AM GOING TO PUT LEDERHOSEN ON AND CHICKEN DANCE ON YOUR GRAVE, IT WILL BE EMBARRASSING FOR THE BOTH OF US

Holy fucking kek, I love this one

>Baby guns arent match for heavy , go play whit scout

>YOUR BERLIN WALL COULD NOT STOP MY RONALD RAYGUN
oh my fuck

>hey mate, miss depth perception yet?
>time to put down the bottle, scotty
>don't bring a sword to a bombfight, mate
>woah, that looked painful mate. keep an eye open next time

>heads up, wilbur, i'm cookin bacon tonight
>too bad yer girlfriend isn't around to pick up the pieces
>you're big! and fat! and DEAD! HAHAHAHA, no offense, roadhog
>four hundred thousands dollars to miss every shot and blow up AHAHAHAHA

>help doc, i blew my load!
>quick, someone get an ambulance!
>the doctor is in... millions of pieces! AAHAHAHA!
>so i guess i'm not getting a second opinion, doc?

>YOUR BERLIN WALL COULD NOT STOP MY RONALD RAYGUN
Lewd!

This thread makes me laugh because of the great lines, but also cry because i can't come up with a single good one.

This one is so bad
>So the Chinese are building walls again? maybe we can force them to make ours

>"Wait a darn seco- that's no flashbang!"
>"Hmph. How disgraceful."
>"Ugh! Do you have no shame?"
>"I knew you were scared, but you have no excuse to piss self, now!"
>"OI MATE, HE DOES IT TOO! HE DOES IT TOO!"
>"This isn't nanobots, it's...EUGH!"

Shit, these are pretty good.

>lemonade wont stop death

Reaper is the only good thing from overwatch, and it was a fucking accident.

>the doctor is in...millions of pieces
gold

Engie

>Go back to school, Shorty

>Y'all call that a gun?

>Hows that neutrality workin for ya nurse?

>Well, could always use the spare parts

>My sentry got you in its sights

>Squeel for me big guy, heheh

Medic

>Hows that licence working for you?

>I bet you dont even experiment on your patients

>A better doctor wouldn't let vem die

...

...

>YOU'RE MORE FIT FOR TEA PARTIES THAN A WEAPON, SALLY
>YOUR CHICKEN LEGS WILL NOT OUTRUN DEATH, SISTER
>I WILL GO BACK IN TIME TO STOP YOU FROM BEING MORE PATHETIC THAN YOU ALREADY ARE NOW
>THE CAVALRY WOULD LAUGH YOU OFF THE PODIUM, ELIZABETH
>ALL THE FLEETING HORSES IN THE WORLD WON'T SAVE YOU FROM THIS ENRAGED AMERICAN
>THE WAR WILL END WITH YOUR DEATH, MS. REVERE

Thats both true and really weird since i never realized that he lacked specific domination lines.

Just thought it was going to be a fun response to mercy's revival.

>believing conspiracy theories
wew laddy how's it feel being clinically insane

link to previous thread? I missed it

It was just a few posts at the end of a regular TF2 thread. They've already been reposted here.

Heavy would have a blast trash talking thorbjorn.

>What sick man send bearded baby to fight me?

>you wont find your eye at the bottom of a bottle, try meditating

>CYKA BLYAT TO THE GULAG

>sniper to mercy
> too slow, medicine woman

>DOMINATED, YA HOP-SCOTCHIN' MOP-HEADED WANKER
>I GOT SIX MONKEYS JUST LIKE YA OVER MY MANTLE
>MOVE OVER PORKY, HERE COMES THE REAL KING OF AUSTRAILIA
>DOM-IN-ATED, SHIELA! YA GETTING THAT FEELING OF DEJA VU YET?

You gotta have good knowledge of both games to make the good ones that shine

Damn that's pretty good.

>I SEE YOUR WALL AND RAISE YOU A ROCKET JUMP
>GLASSES! WHAT MARVELS OF THE FUTURE YOU HOLD
>THE RED MENACE IS NOW RED SNOW

>Find your center... not my head.

>>THE RED MENACE IS NOW RED SNOW
Yes.

I wonder how the Overwatch cast would react to Halloween bosses.

>Turn off that damn techo babble and git yourself some real music, boy

>YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW, SPECTER
>GO BACK TO BUILDING PYRAMIDS, ROCKET JUMPING IS A MAN'S JOB
>YOU CANNOT WALL-CLIMB AWAY FROM ME, GRINCHY LABAMBA
>YOUR HEALING RIFLE PUTS ME TO SLEEP JUST LOOKING AT IT
>I'VE SEEN BETTER MONKEYNAUTS CRASH LAND ON AN ENEMY BASE, YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TO DO BETTER THAN THAT
>GO BACK TO MAKING SNOW CONES, CHOW YUN-FAT

>I'M BETTER WITH A BOW THAN YOU, AND I DON'T NEED DRAGONS!

>Padre?

youtube.com/watch?v=aJr68U7K-wA

Engineer to Winston. "I'll be damned, Poopy Joe made it back home."

>HAHAHAHAHAH! Everyone! Look! It is tiny baby dwarf!
>Heavy will use you for target practice!
>Tiny toys, tinier man!
>I DESTROY cowards toys! AGAIN!

>GO BACK TO MAKING SNOW CONES, CHOW YUN-FAT

oh my flying fuck

Which one? Merasmus, Monoculus, pic related?
Bumper cars?

"Ooh Hoo Hoo your gun shoots medicine. It's intimidating"

>what you do with a dragon, I do with a bullet
>your jumping around made for a harder shot than the scout, but not by much
>one more angel on the ground
>YOU BLOODY FROGS CANT TAKE ME FROM ANY RANGE
>YOU WERE THE LEAST DANGEROUS GAME, YOU FLYIN' APE

Darn, y'all have made some cool Domination lines.
What about revenge lines though, any ideas?

...

>All the mumbo jumbo in the world won't beat the world's BEST sniper!
>Eh? Wuzzat yer sayin' mate? Couldn't 'ere ya over the punctured lungs! Hahahah.
>Bring a REAL snoipin' weapon next time, ya horse-tailed cantonese clown!

>poor scout. you can run from me but you can't run from your failures
> only a fool will do the same task and expect a different result, so don't try to fight me again

>revenge lines
implying the tf2 classes would get dominated by overwatch heros

>"Little piece of advice, try firing bullets instead of darts."
>"Your lack of skill is putting me to sleep more than your darts."
>"The real reaper of the battlefield has come for you, mate."

I got nothing

In his infinite wisdom, the great Gaben would still put the lines in in case someone is too shit at the game to prevent crashing. ;)

>I May have lost to a women, but now look whose dead!

>FIRST DO NO HAHM, FRAU DOKTOR!
>NOW I SEE VHY YOU SWISS AVOID ZE FIGHTING

>NEW COWARD, NEW TOYS, SAME NATASCHA! DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA POW
>NOW THEY ARE SENDING APE TO FIGHT HEAVY? DID I KILL ALL THE TINY BABIES ALREADY?
>HAH! SQUASHED ANOTHER LITTLE INSECT RUNNING AROUND HEAVY
>PUNY ROBOT MAKES FAKE NATASCHA, BUT REAL NATASCHA MAKES PUNY ROBOT SCRAP

10/10

>it's not wise to camp on top of me bombs, mate
>i'm messin with texas. whaterya gonna do about it?
>(in mock cowboy accent) this town ain't big enough fer da two of us... PFFTAHAHAHAHA
>too bad they don't have demolitions 101 in university, huh mate?

>snipe this, you baby
>no wonder you're over here, they'd tear you apart back home
>maybe you could see my bombs if that scope wasn't jammed in your face!
>hey, bushman's rules, right? ahahahahaha

>looks like you just snagged a one-way flight back to france!
>you can't hide from my bombs, mon-sewer
>like that? i call it the croak and stagger, AHAHAHAHA
>ah, sorry mate, did i blow your cover?

>Your penchant for violence astounds me, large man. You have had a rough life... I will aid you in ending it.
>Interesting, machines without sentience, with as much of a drive to kill... what a pity.
>Your dedication to your country is inspiring, exalt your values as I do mine.
>The closer you look, the less you see... unless it is right behind me.
>Doctors. A bridge between life and death. A commendable profession marred by your twisted morality.
>A fear of the unknown is understandable. You need not be ostracized anymore, my masked companion.

It's oddly relaxing to write these

"Sun Tzu invented war, but America invented winning!" Soldier to Hanzo or Genji (Although I guess Mei would be more accurate)

> now you know what it actually means to be backstabed genji HAHAHAH

Poopy Joe, taken too soon

Heavy to Reinhardt
>I've killed BIGGER metal giants
>Next time fight with fists, old baby man

>Soldier
>caring about accuracy

>OI, these tranq darts aren't half bad

Okay but

who would fuck who

>SWINGING YA LITTLE BOOTER KNIFE AROUND LADDY? HA! LET ME SHOW YOU A REAL MAN'S SWORD!
>IT'S GONNA BE A COLD DAY IN HELL FOR YOU LASS, GOOD THING YA ALREADY GOT A COAT!
>YA DON'T EVEN 'AVE A ROCKET LAUNCHER! HOW'RE YOU GONNA EVEN THINK ABOUT FIGHTING ME?
>OH, THE WEE LITTLE LEPRECHAUN'S GONE AN' LOST HIS POT O' GOLD! LET ME HELP YA FIND YER BOOTY, HAH!
>WITH ALL THOSE EYES IN YER 'EAD YA THINK YA WOULDA SEEN THAT ONE COMIN'!

hell yeah
zenyatta brings the fire

I would fuck you

Scout would fuck zarya
Sorry let me rephrase that, Zarya would fuck scout.

>Back from ze dead! Now you RETURN to it, you ghastly geist!
>Giant man will NOT be beat by less giant woman!
>Snoipin's in me blood, no matter how much ya try ta' drain it from me, doctor.
>WOOHOOHOOHOO! Ya see dat!? I'm so fast, I jumped into duh future where yer DEAD!

this looks like someone just made a robot version of a girl from MGQ

>WOOHOOHOOHOO! Ya see dat!? I'm so fast, I jumped into duh future where yer DEAD!

beautifal.

>:O

>WOOHOOHOOHOO! Ya see dat!? I'm so fast, I jumped into duh future where yer DEAD!
Send help.

that last one is great

"Game Over, you lose!"
"We interrupt this stream to remind you, you suck!"
"Perhaps you should stick to your games, little bunny."
Spy to D.va
>Implying I wouldn't be corrected if I hadn't mentioned it

>You're just givin me a clean shot to the heart, love
>Im a Aussie, that spider stuff doesn't work on me
>All beauty, No brains hehe

>Hold up Hudini, lemme channel my inner peace onto your caved in head. OOOOOOOHHHHHMMM!
>I am the Dahli Lama of killing robots!
>Here I got some karma for ya! MY ASS!

I feel like Heavy would be the type to respect women considering his house was full of them

He'd still banter, but calling them ugly would be out of character in my opinion

>NICE TRY CROISSANT, BUT I COULD SEE YOUR WHITE FLAG FROM A MILE AWAY

Nice.

>Implying he wouldn't be disappointed that a Russian messed with themselves like that

He would shield Sasha's eyes in horror.

He would most likely fuck Symmetra

He could hate Zarya because she's a wanabee hero as opposed to his family members who actually had to live a horrible life full of hardship.

>course a bloody woman needs eight eyes to shoot straight

>I heard you were going to be at Olympics?
After that Heavy is glad you did not embarrass Mother Russia.

>You remind me of sister, except you are weak.

This was a fun thread.

>was
what stopping you from posting

I feel like Demo should be outright immune to sleep darts

>"AH'VE DRANK STRONGER STUFF THEN WHATE'ERS IN THA' WEE LITTLE PIN PRICK YOU CALL A SEDATIVE"

Bump

This reminds me, didn't the guy who does the voice of scout used to have a youtube account where he uploads video with him being in-role?

Not only does he still do, he also twitch streams and has his own pub server. I've been on there a couple of times, he ain't half-bad.

>Explosives? ha! Go back to blowing the Fritzes

He still does. I actually played against him before and his scout game is actually only average. He shoves the Bartz out real time though, Fucking amazing that

We should send him a bunch of these lines to do

Brilliant. Although shame it would trigger someone, as usual.

super bump

Doesn't he like also say specific lines in the Scout voice for money, on his Twitch? I wouldn't mind donating to that shit just to see him say some of these..

>>NOW I SEE VHY YOU SWISS AVOID ZE FIGHTING
Damn that's good.

>you call that a syringe gun?
>hey you stole my uber charge. I PATENTED THAT

Heavy after killing Amari or anyone with a neat hat
>ROSES ARE RED
>VIOLETS ARE BLUE
>GIVE ME YOUR HAT

He'd probably do to her what he did to Zhana.

He would probably do like in this deleted scene from the comics.

you for got
>you shit waifu

Scout dominating Tracer: Ouch! Let's see that again in slow motion.

Soldier - Pharah: Eagle takes falcon. Checkmate!

Where did ya find this friend?

Good this thread is still up and I've got some Zarya lines

>I suggest doing 500 sit ups a day to get rid of that gut
>I can bench press you, skinny man
>Why don't you attack me from the from so you can get a better view of my muscles
>I crushed bigger sentries in the Ominc wars
>My body is already an unstoppable weapon
>You break my pride. I break your bones.

Who won that fight?

I feel like Spy would have a hard time with his disguises considering he won't have anybody's mobility options

Tracer

The comic is 'Blood in the water', and the deleted page is on the wiki. I do remember seeing it before in the comic, oddly.

Demoman's face on the last panel is just perfect, Sniper kinda looks like dale gribble.

But his cloak would be so fucking OP

>hmpfrffhv

Okay okay, to keep this thread rolling

Flirt lines between the OW crew and the TF2 crew, GO

Tracer.

"Got some crumpets.... Wanna shag?"

How so? It's not OP in TF2, and Overwatch has no ammo limit, so there's spam everywhere, not to mention if you have a Winston you're fucked.

Ey bby u want sum fuk?

Ok, the granny one got a chuckle out of me

>WOOHOOHOOHOO! Ya see dat!? I'm so fast, I jumped into duh future where yer DEAD!
God damn this is thread of the week.

You wouldn't be able to see people taking the flank routs even when the whole team is in one area, he's be able to get out of fights easily.

>Gotta bucket of fish and chips.. wanna do it?

That's bullshit.

Are.... uh are you... you're probably busy this weekend right?

Yep

>you know you want me to rain freedom from above?

she can teleport
what did you expect

>overwatch lacks this kind of writing for characters
>all the voice work for characters in overwatch are just "puns" involving their primary characteristic instead of anything with decent writing
why

Watch the fight, you'll be even more pissed off.

Even Nate on his last livestream said it was rigged

I didn't expect Scout to stand in one spot for two thirds of the fight

>Allahu Ackbar!
>SALIM SAWARIM

I don't want to give them a view, please summarize what you mean.

yeah
>bizzard probably paid for a win

Got some for Sniper here
>Roses 'r red, corpses r' blue... you'd relate a lot to the second part, wouldn'tcha?
>Whoops! Sorry mate! Didn't mean to--... huh, guess I DID mean ta' hit ya. (Toblerone)
>Looks like it's me lucky day, I get to bag the world's SECOND fattest man!
>Heh heh, noice try mate, but a walkin' sentry ain't gonna shake me.
>Do-Mi-NATED, ya prancin' squirrel voiced English nanny!
>Spoi's gonna love this, I can bag women in mid-air!

>tfw valve probably wont put this much character effort into any future games
I'm hoping they port TF2 to Source 2, but I doubt it. They are even closing up the TF2 stories if the comics will ever fucking update

>valve
>future games

they already said tf2 is 100% not being ported to source 2

We can all agree that the tf2 comics are better in any sort of way, right?

Really? source?

youtube.com/watch?v=hfnLGyfmY84

Fuck yeah. Let's just hope it updates soon, they are fantastic. I love how they introduced the classic TF characters as the villains, that shit was unexpected

Screwattack completely disregards all of Tracer's limitations so she's able to blink out of everything, including a taunt kill. The fight was also horribly animated. It's a good thing One Minute Melee's taking over as the more popular and respected fanwank video series.

Yeah, it's staying on source.

Not him but
>Scout stands still for most of the fight
>Taunt kills tracer at one point and doesn't kill her
>Tracer almost infinitely blinks
>Basically always has her ult up despite doing very little damage
>Scout stuns Tracer and does nothing with it
>Tracer steals Scout's bonk as he's about to drink it
>They mention that Scout has a large arsenal of weaponry and he doesn't use any of it

That wasn't all of it and it wasn't in chronological order but there you go.

...

The guys of OMM are pretty cool dudes too. They have actual experience under their belt and are fairly accurate even without "research"

Even though that's kind of a lampshade considering the Little Mac vs Ippo fight, they used StylesX2's combo for Mac

>>Roses 'r red, corpses r' blue... you'd relate a lot to the second part, wouldn'tcha?
>>overwatch lacks this kind of writing for characters
To be fair, only a handful of their characters would sound natural talking shit and being smartasses. The rest are just too serious.

In fact, taking itself too seriously is pretty much the entire problem with Overwatch's story and characters.

Almost forgot
>They hold the Overwatch cinematics as the reason why Tracer can blink so much
>Also say that Meet the Medic isn't credible because you can't see the rockets hitting Scout

ayyyyyy
but really, where did you find out about this

>ah, sorry mate, did i blow your cover?

10/10

here, thank you , didn't want to explain it, im too lazy lmao

death battle is meant for 15 year olds and its biased, either towards fads or just plain nostalgia stuff, this time the fad won, overwatch will not die fast, thats a fact, but blizzard is pushing its memes way too far, people will eventually stop playing it, even if they add new content, unlike tf2's steady growth in players/decrease in players, overwatch was way too shilled and that always backfires, look at most good games that are seen as bad (even thought they did achieve a good number of sales) like indies and games that are centered in a genre fad like "hero shooter" or "turn based rps" or "killing-free game" some meme term buzzword made up by the developers.

They also totally ignore mvm which is canon

>I disappear too... except I come back... heh heh heh...

Deadringer

>GUN BEATS SWORD FRUITCAKE

Also, Nathan doesn't voice Scout in this. He even said he'd do it for free, but Screwattack just ignored the guy and got some random faggot to do it.

...

>Screwattack is probably the reason Nintendo abandoned Metroid Shit company run by a fucking backstabbing hack.

>Oh stop vhining! It's just a little violent dimemberment! Mercenaries dese days...

What?

>actual voice of scout said he would do it
>they didn't even pay him any attention and got someone else to do it instead
I would have said nobody could be this retarded, but the video speaks for itself.

It's not that they ignored him, it's that they already finished all the lines with the other guy they got before Nathan offered

Classic mercenary team playable when?

You are clearly aware of the period character's existence, yet you stalwartly refuse to use it.

They didn't ignore him, Nathan only caught wind of it a little too late, after all the lines had been recorded and the video was just about done. Though they should have totally contacted him first, maybe they didn't know he had a twitter.

>YOU MOVE LIKE MOLASSES AND YOUR MUSIC SUCKS!
>YOU AINT NEVER GONNA SCORE, JUST LIKE SOCCER!
>MIX THAT, DREADLOCKS!
>HAHAHA, YOU WEAR ROLLERBLADES! *ROLLERBLADES*! AHAHA!

Yep. But it still doesn't hold a candle to that fucking trainwreck TF2 vs OW video MatPat posted. If you want retarded, check that shit out.
youtube.com/watch?v=eP45nc2_st8

I'd throw away all the imitation lines for the real thing. I mean, it wouldn't take long, and I think Nathan tweeted to them a couple days before release.

Why did you have to remind me of this?

>TF2 vs OW video
Well that doesn't mean it's inherently stup
>MatPat
Fuck that noise.

Fucking bravo.

There are a couple good response videos to this:
youtube.com/watch?v=c3wBXvBtUAs
youtube.com/watch?v=IvGqfVaHHzo

>dead faster than evolve
couldn't help it

>Heheyyy! Look! Real ninjas! Spy could learna thing 'er two from ya!
>Whazzat you say everytime ya throw those freakin' huge dragons? Ryan walkie talkie somethin'?
>Hey y'know there's a song written 'bout you, right?! S'bout ninjas too!
>With these moves, they oughta call me the Bostonian Ninja! [kung fu noises]
>BOOM! Just smashed that stupid goatee right offa ya' smug face!
>Ninjas, samurai, cyborg ninjas... all I know is, there's a hot wind blowin' when I'm around!
>YEAHEAHEAH! Bats ARE better than swords! Eat that, Demoman!

Sniper vs Ana
>Bloody hell, how'd an amateur like you even live this long?
>Aw, can't shoot straight with those cataracts, can you?
>That'll put you to sleep, you hag.

Scout vs Reaper
>Yo dumbass, maybe you could reload some of those shotguns if you had a free hand.
>Hey, he really is a ghost!

Engineer vs Bastion
>Don't cross me again, son. I *build* tougher machines than you.
>I just sent your sorry behind back to the drawin' board, partner.

>response videos
That somehow disgusts me more. Plus, to understand them, I'd have to watch the MatPat video in the first place. Again, fuck that noise.

The response videos at least have some humor to them and you're [technically] not giving views to matpat

>Pink hair? Tiny baby like you would not last minute in Gulag.

nice

I think we all agree that they need to increase the amounts of voice lines in Overwatch. And I'm not talking about shit you have to unlock.

Did MatPat ever get called out for removing the comments of reputable TF2 youtubers.

But that would require writers that actually have talant.

>yfw these comics are setting up TF3
>TF2 cast is RED
>TFC cast is BLU
>All new game modes, along with rebalanced stock weapons for both sides
>This will never happen

These lines are all fucking fantastic, I love you guys.

I don't get it

>piss into the iris

>You've got skates on and you're still eatin' my dust.
>Go back to the roller rink, maggot, playtime's over.
>Huddah hmm mm hmm! Mmmph huddah hmm hmm hmm! Get off of the walls! I have to clean those now!
>Yer makin' up for me lack of sight by playin' tunes? Och, bless your heart, lad.
>I much prefer classical music. Eщё paзик, eщё дa paз!
>Y'all can't skate past my bullets, can ya, slick?
>Zat is Seven for Germany and.. oh, I vill give Brazil a pity point.
>Right between the ears. Sounds like you won't be healing up from that now, will ya?
>Turn that racket down and you might hear me coming next time.

>Read thread.
>all the made up lines from the TF2 cast.
are great and sound like things they would say.

>Overwatch made up lines are pretty shit.

but I knew this would be the outcome.

Overwatch Cast has nothing on the TF2 cast on likability because the Overwatch cast is bland as fuck save for Reinheart and the Aussie bros.

I own both TF2 and Overwatch.

Scout to Zenyatta
>Eyy it's like Baseball, You throw yah ball, And I cave yah skull in

this is true but zen has got some i your clever

>That burn from Medic

It's still as fucking hilarious as it is tragic to this day.

The 'Screwattack' is an ability Samus can use in her games.

This dude's probably miffed that they took the name to use for their website.

>Revival? Have you considered not letting them die in the first place?
>I considered wings once, but Archimedes just would not cooperate.

>Oh I'll break it down, hippie. I'll break your skinny Brazilian bones down until those headphones are blasting the Star Spangled Banner!

>OI BLUEBERRY, YOU WOULDN'T LAST A SECOND IN THE BATTLEMENTS
>TAGGED YA, YA CREEPY ROOM TEMPERATURE CROISSANT
>YOU DON'T THINK I'M NOT USE TO KILLING THE FRENCH?

It's funny that people criticise TF2 for being full of white males when TF2 is actually far better at representing various ethnicities than Overwatch is.

Case in point: Tracer. Literally no one in the UK talks like that. She looks like a Japanese American and the Union Jack on her arm, which itself is just a sign that they had no fucking idea how to make someone look british, just looks like an irrelevant part of her punk motif.

Sniper, on the other hand, could genuinely be a real Australian. Nailed his costume design, his facial structure, his accent, his quips and his fighting style.

but he's white

>Sniper
>Australian

i'm thinking his response would involve capoera

>Australians fight by throwing jars of piss at people

One thing that bothered me is that Hanzo doesn't use japanese style archery, not even a heavily modified techno-enhanced version of it.

Granted I'm talking about BEFORE TF2 got really weird.

>keep an eye open next time
oh my fucking shit

>Australian
>He doesn't know

>people criticise TF2 for being full of white males
Do people outside of new world video game journalists actually do this

He doesn't even look Japanese either.

B-but user! He speaks random japanese words and has the accent! Rook! Rook! Rear nihojin ancestry!

Because the game is developed by Blizzard

B I M O N T H L Y

This thread is a great read. To bad Overwatch will never have mod support and the original VAs for TF2 will never record these lines so we could mod them in.

>How about putting some bullet proof glass on that walking dunny of yours, Sheila?

>tracer to sniper
Oi u fukken convict, you wanna sum fuck?

>tfw the series was supposed to be 6 issues long
>now it's fucking seven

>The Sword Art Online Subreddit

Soldier to Soldier:
"You wouldn't have rated in the service in the first place."
"You Stolen-Valor types are all talk."
"Hope you aren't expecting a flag draped over your coffin."

It is harder

>Sniper
>Focus on one point, and you will hit all that is there, but miss the world around you.

>Scout
>No amount of running will ever free you from your doubts.

>Soldier
>Thin is the line between passion and zealotry.

Could come up with more, maybe stuff better than this tripe, but I think the thread's about to end.

>those joke tabs

yeah tf2 and ow are like touhou and kancolle
touhou and tf2 have pretty organic memes
but with ow and kancolle you can feel how they were made to appeal as many people as possible

And then you realize all the new items make the game the game shit

such as

Not that guy, but 99% of Pyros weapons.

>Ay bozo, I got somin' you can gaze into! BOINK!

Nathan Vetterlein would do the Scoot ones
Robert Atkin Downes loves doing the Medic voice
I don't know about Gary Schwartz
Rick May can't yell anymore because of his throat

youtu.be/eP45nc2_st8?t=590

Widowmaker would just get aroused

>Your penchant for violence astounds me, large man. You have had a rough life... I will aid you in ending it

Fucking brutal.

Time to tackle some cringe:
>You can't outrun death
>You're dumber than HE is
>Mumbler
>Druken fool
>And I thought the Aussie was fat
>And I'll break it all; over, and over, and over
>Quake
>She's better than you
>You can't hide from death

bait video

Du bist* der untermensch...

sorry.

Reaper is like a paradox; everyone including the game takes him too seriously, which is contradicted by Blizzard clearly taking the piss out of him with how over the top edge he is, which once again is contradicted by the fact that his character is involved in one of the most important events in Overwatch, which means he's MEANT to be taken seriously but also laughed at because of how ridiculous he is, which means it's hard to write lines for him because Blizzard has no idea what they want for him

Am I missing something or is this just really fucking stupid
You gave it a shot user

thats really bad

>Real nice effort Deutsche bag!
>Dominated you rifle dropping Frenchie!
>What do you and Jane Austen have in common? You're both dead women
>Go play your pinko chess game with the devil commie
>I will send my condolences to your kangaroo wife

These are all real voice lines btw

Well i hope reaper is supposed to be hilariously edgy.
>grim reaper like appearance and personality
>dual shotguns
>wears leather
>LITERALLY TELEPORTS BEHIND YOU
There's no way someone qualified to design AAA games can make him and think "yeah, that sounds cool"

>You're not scaring anybody wise-guy. Now a man with a pumpkin head, THAT is scary.

>Nothing personal kid

>Reaper runs into the ghost
>Has a unique scream that's hilariously high pitched

>DOMINATED LADY MU-BOMB-MAD, YOU COULDN'T EVEN GET A CROP DUSTING LICENSE WITH THAT KIND OF FLYING
>TRY GRAPPLING AWAY FROM THE ROCKETS NEXT TIME MS. BAGUETTE
>GAZE INTO THE IRIS OF LIBERTY BEATNIK-BOT
>WAR'S A LOT DIFFERENT FROM YOUR COMPUTER GAMES ISN'T IT LITTLE MISS SPANDEX
>YOU CALL YOURSELF A SOLDIER DRESSING LIKE THAT? WEAR THE UNIFORM SON!
>YOUR SMOKE AND MIRRORS WON'T SCARE THIS SOLDIER SPOOKS MCGEE
>MAYBE I NEED TO REMIND YOU OF WHY ITS CALLED A ZOO, MAGILLA GORILLA

>YOUR SMOKE AND MIRRORS WON'T SCARE THIS SOLDIER SPOOKS MCGEE

GUYS.
SPOOKS MCGEE

>WEAR THE UNIFORM SON!
Uh...

>MAGILLA
>GORILLA

But they do?

>MAYBE I NEED TO REMIND YOU OF WHY ITS CALLED A ZOO, MAGILLA GORILLA

>MAYBE I NEED TO REMIND YOU OF WHY ITS CALLED A ZOO, MAGILLA GORILLA
Nice.

Scout to Reaper
>HEY, AIN'T YOU THE KID I USED TO PICK ON BACK IN HIGH SCHOOL?

I'LL SEND MY CONDOLENCES TO YOUR POLAR BEAR HUSBAND

Sun Tzu = Zoo

HOLY SHIT

Are TF2 mercenaries okay with killing women?

thanks m8

that's some dangerous thinking, and i dont even know why. funny how that works

Yes they kill pyro all the time

Depends on the merc, really. I can see the Scout and the Engi having some issue with doing it. I mean, they'd probably still do it but yeah.

I think there'd be some hesatation at first but they'll get over it as soon as bullets start flying.

they're mercenaries, they're paid to murder people.
Half of them are insane

>Chivalry is dead and so are you.
>Nothing personal bleu madame, but I have to stay competitive.
>I get the feeling this dead gorilla was smarter than the people I work with.
>A skull mask? I'm more embarrassed than you are.
>You died as you lived, a fallen angel!
>A cigar is just a cigar, and you are just bad.

Pyro, Medic and Spy no question.

>half
While we're at it, throw Miss Pauling in there, she's just as fucked up as the rest of them.

I can see most of them objecting until the first shot is fired

What would the mercenaries think of the Omnic war after their experiences with MvM?

>Why aren't these robots dropping wads of cash?

>she's just as fucked up as the rest of them.
Not really. She's okay with killing and covering-up crimes, but that's it.

You fuckers got me dl'ing TF2 again

Try to find good community servers you like, casual matchmaking was a mistake.

Have fun.

>A gun that big doesn't suit a sissy like you.
>A grown man like you outta stand front for yourself, not behind staring at ass.
>This Babe Ruth here could use some sandwich.
>Quit fiddling with your toys and shoot for yourself for once.
>I like you. Especially the size of your head, comrade.
>Didn't knew they had so many gunpowders in Africa.
>Thanks for standing still, Aussie.
>Arizona winter days are hotter than those kerosenes you're spurtin' out.

For real, Soldier might actually shout "Back to the kitchen".

>We'll never get a crossover film/game
>Even if we did it wouldn't be as good as this thread
Shame

D.va would probably say someting like "Here comes the boss fight!"

She has no problem cutting up corpses, torturing enemies for intel, or killing.

He doesn't treat the chick he's banging now like that, though.

>>"JUMP BACK IN TIME ALL YOU WANT, REDCOAT. YOU WILL NEVER UNDO THE INDEPENDENCE OF THIS GREAT NATION, OR YOUR ASS KICKING"
fucking A, but probably too long

Of course the game and the movie shit all over that
>Comics
>Stone cold professional
>Games/SFM
>xdd so wacky retard lol!!!

>A fear of the unknown is understandable. You need not be ostracized anymore, my masked companion.

My old favorite server is dead
I don't know how I can return again

To be fair TF2 merchs are all assholes so they can write some great banter without worrying much about them behaving out of character
the reaper ones are pretty good

Yeah, I completely forgot about her giving Sniper some advice on burying dead bodies. Sorry, you're right.

Meet the Soldier came out 7 years ago

Only because Zhanna is just as crazy as he is

Blizzard is the king of unironically ironically edgelords because everybody else they make is bland as fuck

Soldier's a lucky man

>including the game
youtube.com/watch?v=knD6CqI3t04

>hard to write lines for him
just keep going extremely edge. it's working

>He could hate Zarya because she's a wanabee hero as opposed to his family members who actually had to live a horrible life full of hardship.
Wasn't Zarya's family killed by robots?

He earned those women, user.

Also

>American fucking a Russian

STALIN KEKED
T
A
L
I
N

C
U
C
K
E
D

Malthael is pretty good, he comes off as edgy, but his motivation makes complete sense

Reinhardt wouldn't jeer at any of the TF2 cast, he'd just try to befriend them and want to have a drink with Heavy and Demoman.

The opposite, the OW characters have very firmly established character traits, which is why writing anything for this particular TF2 vs OW banter scenario without getting out of character is difficult. Few of them engage in banter and almost none of them have any hostile relationship with one another that would lend to comical banter. Only a few exist such as Tracer mocking Reaper's edgyness.

The TF2 characters are a lot more generic, based around their roles rather and very broad traits than any sort of grounded character. Each of them are sooo wacky that their banter extends into killing the opponents and talking about game concepts and roles.

I want to see those two russians fight.

Fucking gold m8

>Reflect my foot up your ass, pal!
>Here's you right now: HEE-KA-WAKI- Dead!
>Lotta good that sword did ya!
>Quit playing darts and use a gun!
>Spent so much time finding peace ya couldn't find my bat in your skull!

>Ooooh, you can roll around on the ground! Don't you feel special!
>Guess your flashbang was so bright you couldn't see me hitting ya!
>It takes you six shots, it only takes me one bat to kill ya!
>It's high time you died, you loony bastard!
>This ain't a Western movie, pal, go back to Hollywood
>Oh man, look at the time! Oh wait, you're dead!

>What are you doing?! You're shooting balls at me!
>Hey, make one of those toilet things so I can shit down one of them!
>Oh I'm sorry, was my bat two inches too close to your face?
>Eat it, ya OCD fruitcake!
>You teleported somewhere just for me to kill ya! Good job!
>Spent so much time looking at shapes you didn't see me kill ya!

>HINGADINGA DURGEN you tiny little dwarf man!
>Bat A goes into Slot U, ya Swedish dolt!
>Oh man, you're so tiny! How do you even live?
>Suck on these Swedish meatballs, dwarfie!
>I shoved my bat so far down your throat, it came out your ass, you tiny tiny man!
>Next time, try building something that makes you 5 foot, shortie!

Whose the best husbando and why is it Medic?

Scout

To Tracer
>So uh... You come here often?

To Hanzo
>So much for that honor stuff uh?

To Lucio
>The only "beat" around here is you pal!

To D.Va
>Video games? What the hell are video games?

To Mercy:
>Well hellooooo nurse!

To Reaper:
>Looks like death doesn't walk anymore!

Demo/Soldeir
To Bastion
>WHAT HAS SCIENCE DONE

>Lad, I'd rather get a shield than to be a shield.
>Son, this is no place for a child to wonder around.
>Hmph, there's at least one war pigs for every fights.
>No sane man deals with explosives, aye?

Thats all I git

>Well helooooo nurse
Lost

no

bara a shit

Because most of OW's characters are stone-cold serious, so it's harder to mine humor out of them.

If you don't mind waking up with organs missing and him being more attracted to pidgeons than you sure.

>It's high time you died, you loony bastard!
heh

>Been years since I last played
>Look up my favorites list
>They're all dead and/or empty
Trade servers probably got hit the hardest, everybody just uses backpack.tf or scrap.tf for all their trading needs, especially because people are constantly looking for the best deals for maximum gain. Only ones that still have active population are minecraft ones because the autistic kiddies love minecraft.

Who needs kidneys, anyway.

Medic to Bastion
>Hey Archimedes, is zat bird a friend of yours?

well in that case so is reaper
>killed, and brought back forcefully through nanobots or some shit
>body is constantly degrading and regenerating at an accelerated rate, constantly in pain

>tfw you go to bed with medic and wake up missing your skeleton

That's how he lost his medical license.

Except Tracer, Reinhardt and Lucio, which oddly enough no one is trying to make lines for