Hi and welcome to the Apple Store. My name is Jay Kuch, how can I assist you today sir?

Hi and welcome to the Apple Store. My name is Jay Kuch, how can I assist you today sir?

>shove gun in his face

I'll show you who's the boss of this gym

>actually end up in an Apple store because I want to get a replacement for my mom's gen 1
>ask difference between the new air and the other one
>they say there's no difference just the price
>read the little plastic placard on the table
>it actually specifies the processor and ram difference
who employs these people?

Hi Jay, i have a pc with i7 920, gtx 780, Asus PT6Deluxe and its awesome.

hello is it covered under warranty if I got my boyfriends semen in the internals

>Hi Mrs. Cuck do you sell anything that respects my freedom?


Most apple store specialists are morons who spout shit they don't know or understand

Hi there! My wife's ex-husband's autistic son has one of those! I only specialise in Apple products though sir


sorry for the long wait, long day helping so many people out with their apple products!

thank you sir, have a great day

our apple store specialists are trained to the highest degree possible. We only employ people who love our products

Would you like to replace all that with a brand new iMac? Its a great all in one solution for all your needs, and it comes with mac os!

sir you will need to pay an additional fee to clean out the old semen, Tim Cook's first official policy has CEO of Apple.

freedom is something you can agree to once you buy one of our great Apple products, like our new iPhone 7!

sir would you like to become a apple store specialist?

>We only employ people who love our products
Oh it shows

I really appreciate your input about our employees, thank you! Our new iPhone 7's and Apple Watches are now out!

when is the new macbook pro coming out

I went in my local apple store at the mall pretending to be retarded just to listen to them shill their products to me, was pretty fun.

Also the leaked apple handbook is real, they have a unique way of trying to relate to the buyer than just outright saying 'hurr durr apple is better'.

its coming out very soon sir probably next month. We're working hard on removing that unnecessary out of date port, the headphone jack, or as its known by most the "3.5mm jack." and replacing it with our lightening ports! We'll even offer our many ports starting at $30.

oh almost forgot my face!

I'm not sure why I love this thread so much, but I do.

This is my first Apple product. Please be gentle.

I did not get to your request, but sir our airpods are not out yet. When you do get a pair if you do lose them another pair is just $159 w/tax! Thank you for coming into our apple store!

thank you for the nice words, and thank you for coming into the apple store! We have new iPhone 7's and Apple Watches!

Thank you for joining the Apple family! Make sure you pick up a new iPhone 7, it just came out!

Do these fucks still replace Apple headphones for free?

sir we always do, our brand new lightening connector headphones that come with your new iPhone. If you want to charge AND plug in your headphones you can buy a wonderfully crafted Apple port for only $40!

forgot my face again! I just love Apple products so much. They all have something we call the "MAC Address."

>best guess for this image - Anima

Thanks botnet.

Anyone wanna sauce me up.