/brit/

youtube.com/watch?v=2riqL4GOfR8

having a right laugh at this

watching mr reddit

WE HEARD YOU

>made a ballbusting joke at work

how could this go down well?

>these nice £40k cars going for £15k

why aren't you getting yourself a 70,000 mile ting

alri

I hereby christen this thread: Remainia

Whats the difference between a crush and a oneitis again

Fancy this bird but I'm not arsed if it doesn't go anywhere cause I've got tinder and all that

5 1 2 3 4

Where did you come from, where did you go?
Where did you come from, Cotton eye Joe!

would be VERY nice

Imagine being a runt who constantly checks the post number awaiting eagerly the 300 mark so they can disrupt the natural ebb and flow of the tread just so people will post in their runty thread

>4 reddit flags

literally what's the point?

You CONSTANTLY obsess over Korea and Korean girls.

Korea and Korean girls NEVER think of Britain and British men.

Literally turbo runts

There was this new girl being showed round and she stomped on a spider

I said to someone "I'd let her stomp on my bollocks" and we had a chuckle then he called me out on browsing /brit/.

Now I am haha

2,1,3

>just woke up
>work in 10 (ten) hours

it keeps happening

youtube.com/watch?v=QCLX_XLW_7M
doing a sad

archery mentioned

Lads apparently I got with a girl from work last night but I don't remember it at all

She's quite qt but how do I not make it awkward because I want to put my willy in her.

how is that even possible? /brit/ cant have more than 100 unique posters

Had to sit next to two grown men chatting about football for a 40 min train journey.

Just imagine being that much of a runt. Really made me think.

Are those twats still crying about losing?

>6 (SIX) more hours until I can go home from work

...

>a tripcode

literally what's... yeah, fucking exactly. do one.

Fuck off
FUCK off
FuCK OFF
fUCK OfF

I considered doing something not for £15k but almost £5k and I would be paying £3k on insurance

I'll wait until I'm 21 or 25 before I get a really nice car

wew micayla replied

should've joined in

Where do you work? The 1950's?

put your willy in her without permission

All my exes live in texas

got the shits

No
Would gf her desu

holy fuck you're good

my friend that lived down the street was number 3 in my province for a while

he used to let me shoot at this haybale in his backyard, good times

yep lol, whats up dude

ignore the flag im on holiday in the US. hence why i called you "dude" in the beginning of my post. these yanks are rubbing off on me hahaha

but yeah dave you keep on truckin' and always remember to thank God

76 in that thread apparently
if we get rid of non-brits (excluding Irish posters) there's probably like 70

this is a banger, killer mikes a very underrated rapper

youtu.be/6lIqNjC1RKU

FOY

what does a girls hand feel like

One of my exes is Alexis Texas

>'s
*grabs you by the throat and holds you over the edge of a cliff*
drop that apostrophe before I drop you

Imagine being so much of an autist that you stare into space for 40 minutes rather than engaging with the people you're sitting beside

Just IMAGINE being that much of a runt. Really made me think.

People have boring repetitive lives so all they can talk about is sports

It's like Videogames for normal people

Bit like your own, sissyhands

>getting the train
>calls others runts
ahhhhhh
yes

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

like pussy

no need for that attitude, I asked a simple question, a simple answer would've been adequate.

regardless, I trip because I have the option to have an identity on this imageboard. we are not robots, we are humans and we're all unique.

glove full of salty sand and milk

I need to move to Texas.

I bet you love yanks rubbing off on you, all over your face.

ask me how I know you're a virgin

White woman + black man = Violent unruly nigger child

White man + black woman = Lawful, respectful and eloquent mixed race child

kind, but at least RTJ have done pretty well for themselves
though tbf he already has ridiculous credibility from featuring on like four Outkast tracks

obviously not everybody posts in every thread and there are lurkers but thats comfy as fuck going to work with a /brit/ lad

the man kicked the ball to the left
> EEEEE BY GUM HE KICKED IT AGAIN DID HE? FUCKN ELL AND TO THE LEFT AND ALL? FASCINATING
yeah and what's more is... get this lad
*leans in*
he kicked it....
> aye?
he kicked it... he kicked it with his FOOT
> EEEEE NEVER!
E DID!
> EEEEEE MY LAD

>yes, that's it, obsess over bread & circus while the powers that be exploit you. I'd offer you some of this lysergic acid, but i think your pineal glands are beyond saving; would be better off giving you arsenic at this point.

little sister is a massive weeb
might scribble all over her anime posters

How

I'm not though

Lads, what's Sankeys?
Is my mate good if he's DJ'ed there?

black men make terrible fathers

Bf lives in Ireland

>regardless, I trip because I have the option to have an identity on this imageboard. we are not robots, we are humans and we're all unique.

Hit her a dig, give her a shiner my dude

what is a oneitis?

i dont want a oneitis

Club to ping your tits off in Manny
Yeah pretty good desu

x

>tfw INTJ master race

Too many spics.

The Pacific Northwest is the promised land.

anyone else get a stutter randomly?

the man

kicked the ball

to the other man

but this other man tried to stop it

how thrilling is that like

pirate scumbags
youtube.com/watch?v=7jRFjE1xeSM

>sharing something banal with the class and the teacher going "and?" and everyone laughing

>living in the north
>has to get the train
and you probably have to ride this as well haha

Soft and warm. Please tell us you have held a girls hand and are just memeing.

You gay or sumthin?

>out the other night with some mates
>girl who just got engaged is out with us
>see her kissing two random lads in the club

feels bad lads

are all girls like this?

>tfw no £200k/week salary

Hope you told her bf

why do you feel the need to use a proxy?

kinda. started stumbling my words more a few months ago
though tbf I think I was sorta depressed so it might've been some bent side effect of that

post los simpsons

//65065195
Don't reply to me, you haven't the faintest idea who you're dealing with. I could squish you back into the primordial ooze from whence you came... if you were worth the effort.

Scurry away while you still can.

no. my gf gives me a play-by-play of every time she has an interaction with a male that is interested in her. she's crazy loyal and i can sleep easy.

how worth is the rouble?

that isn't me, just some other enlightened scholar that sees sport for the trivial distraction that it is.

I live in London and earn more than you, jog on.

Business idea:employ me to do nothing and shitpost all day

yeah you dont want that feeling at all

its only for serial killers and neckbears

>Ronald Reagan was an actor, not at all a factor
>Just an employee of the country's (((real masters)))
>Just like the Bushes, Clinton and Obama
>Just another talking head telling lies on teleprompters

Looks like killer Mike is the most redpilled rapper out there, he knows about (((them)))

...

used to live in Texas
ama

yeah im memeing i held a girls hand once during some weird exercise in art class once

I feel like I was made to be an Englishman's wife and carry his children 2bh lads

what will you be planning on buying?

No she's just a massive slag.

went out with a few of my education drop-out normie mates the other night.

I unironically heard the phrases "I prefer learning at the University of Life, y'know?" and "We're all one race...the human race. Skin colour means nothing." during the various conversations of the night

or she tells you about the ones she wasn't attracted to and rides the rest

*POUND

Feeling unusually racist tonight

>first day of freshers week
>flatmates are out partying
>I'm still in posting on /brit/
At least I worked out the theme tune to the old Braniff ad thing that was used in the credits of South Park.

Bb Eb G F D Eb Ab Ab Ab Ab D Eb

bad rhyme

mine is super loyal too, but apparently she's cheated on her previous bf multiple times so I'm not sure if she is loyal

What's your business plan?

>Autism the post

describe the aroma of your bellend by comparing it to a crisp

omg a cute french girl posts here???????????????????

>in a good 10 hours time I will start 2 weeks of working in a call centre for absolutely no monetary compensation

Hmm, really makes me think

Hello friend!

Fuck off back there and take your sister with you.

good lad.

all 10 are top lads

>tfw redpilled political rap will never play on the radio

>Things that never happened:the post

>things that didn't happen

dont think i could ever deal with having a gf because i wold have constant paranoia/jealousy about shit like this

no

did you tell her bf?
you need to despite how much you think it'll hurt him and get multiple people to back you up

...

which state should I move to, lads? there are so many choices.
only one requirement so far: hot

Mong
Go out with them tomorrow or you'll have no friends ever

trotskyists like to follow human nature(they all suck dick)

Nah sounds good in the actual rap with the instrumentals and that I assure you if your arsed to look it up

Who /inanaeroplaneoverthesea/ here?

Honestly feel awful for you lad.

Whent he job centre tried to get me to do 'experience' with them I said no and they threatened to sanction me so I said 'keep your money' and left.

Never been back but have a job now. No idea if I'm on some sort of permanent sanction but they never contacted me agian.

genuinely see it all the time

luigi floating on an egg over the sea

you will fuck up your life for three years if you don't partake in freshers activities, not even joking.

it's early af, smash some voddy and get out there asap unless you want to be a friendless neek living in halls or a solo bed-sit for your entire uni career.

She's told me about rejections she'd made to so called "high-value" men included rich boi chads so idk desu...
once a cheater always a cheater, my gf broke up with her ex bf because she met me and wanted to fuck, but wasnt a cheater

Come live with me in California :3

here la

wasnt nice, she had fat hands

...

jalisco

No doubt it was a cold night for the groom in the cuckshed

Was in the old thread for 30 mins before I realised nobody was posting

Why does everyone on /brit/ work in a call centre?

don't know her bf m8

kek I literally did the same thing

You're supposed to phone them up and say you want to cancel JSA but I just never did and I never heard from them again

must be a semi-common occurrence desu

california obviously
been to 31 of them so i know better than most

>American mongrel
No.

who /n+/ here

dunno
depends what I can afford and what will be a good deal

maybe an e46 m3 in good nick, but it's a bit bland because everyone and their uncle has one

got a big willy lads

the UK lacks social mobility

lel

have been there before

how worth is the pound?????

yeah, but how did she kiss them?

did they put themselves onto her or was she up for it?

>decided to fuck up both opportunities the DWP sent me and ignore their emails/phone calls
>will probably get cut off after next month
>decided to postpone suicide
what do i do over the next few months (ideally making money)

The preferred term is "contact centre"

your mum lacks physical mobility

...

ugh the australians are awake

time to hide the good gimmicks

Spooky

ready salted

how is that relevant she's engaged

Awful cunts aren't they?

I'd just finished uni and they clearly thought they would just use me for free labour because I said I wanted to do the civil service fast stream, they took that as meaning be a runt like them.

She was a complete cunt too but when I said keep your money you could tell how defeated she was losing all her little power over my life.

Was genuinely not worth the fifty quid a week.

matt

I really wish I was kidding. I was shocked to hear one phrase uttered, but I literally heard both on the same night (by two different people).

One of them works at pubs and dropped out of his BTEC course a few years ago, the other is a decent guitarist who decided to travel Europe a year ago and spent his time busking and chilling with stoners who let him stay with them. He's very, very lefty, was a vegan for a time, and says a lot of fedora tier quotes.
But he's a good lad. Bit of a druggie and an alkie but he's got a sense of humour and some charm

The joke is they never told me it was a call centre.

I have experience in labouring and engineering and she even mentioned they were looking for apprenticeships and what not.

Wouldn't be so sour about it if I wasn't going to be working for a private company, wouldn't mind doing charity for charities and whatnot but fuck contributing to the private sector for fuck all.

get a second gen saab 9-3 instead mate

piss off we've got enough coloureds

Prawn cocktail 2bh

>call centre for free

literally fucking why?

would be great to tell those power-tripping runts to do one tbqh. Never been on the dole but I imagine that would feel good.

respond plz :(

this is very true.

honestly, freshers isn't THAT important but if you're staying in your room, you'll be THAT guy who people will just smile at and pretend to like.

Arizona

>friend is fucking some girl behind her LDR bf's back
>wants me to meet her

nah

top couple hundred in the world for total time, fight me

>it's early af, smash some voddy and get out there asap unless you want to be a friendless neek living in halls or a solo bed-sit for your entire uni career.
What if he just doesn't want to party? I went out partying numerous times and clubbing was just complete shit. Would rather meet mates through shared interests than through necking down horrible drinks that'll make me feel like shit tomorrow and then my friends will turn out to be completely different and unrelatable when sober.

I hear there's good money in trading illegal materials for money.

Just a thought.

she was cute in the show

cheese and onion

what a load of shit
I lived at home during my first year and still do, and I still go out and I even obtained a gf

Why'd you go to uni then lol

no idea what you're trying to say friend

Thinking of buying a nice sweatshirt with leather elbow patches, is this a good idea? Feels like a good idea but i will let /brit/ have a veto

...

doesn't everyone?
youtu.be/K9PWB7TBxSo?t=2m11s

It's not all bad, if you're worthless then you can't expect to get a decent job for nothing.

I asked a construction company to do voluntary work with them, did 5 weeks and at the end of it they gave me a job.

Yeah the entire thing was absolutely ghastly, staffed by utter cretins who treat you like some horrible clueless chav. Demeaning desu.

Life experiences mate. Reason why I went to UCLan, it's the designated University of Life.

>once a cheater always a cheater, my gf broke up with her ex bf because she met me and wanted to fuck, but wasnt a cheater
I still love her, but no where near as much as I used to and a fraction of a percent that she loves me back

I'll break up with her when she stops being a good study tutor

Too many poofters

Welcome to Tory Britain.

I know lads on here like to wank themselves off over the tories because of 'muh immigrants' but fuck the Tories , seriously.

>Ahhh yes, these private companies will totally be incentivised to hire people to pay them when they can have a free stream of labour from the job centre who have no rights and will have no option but to obey

I don't hate anybody in this life but I wouldn't piss on IDS if he was on fire, he should neck himself.

>Calls people scroungers and makes it easy to sanction people with cancer and who are physically unable to work
>Takes 6 months off his taxpayer funded position when his wife got a very treatable form of breast cancer because he said it was too tough to turn up to parliament.

CUNT
U
N
T

Why do you keep linking your shit threads?

You've been doing it all day, nobody cares.

still dying to know the conclusion to sershlads story

used to really enjoy his blogposts about the call centre and the quest for the work gf and i NEVER got to find out the ending

>having to work for free in order to progress to being a wageslave
Literally worse than slavery

smelly little finnish maggot

t. finnish gf

>nice sweatshirt
no such thing

sorry...i am trying to ask how powerfull is the pound

HULLO

HULLO

WE ARE THE BILLY BOYS

...

a lot

>tfw nearly 19

I'm a bit too old to still be working as a pot wssher for my dad's business, aren't I?

What's a good proper part-time job for a legal adult?

All good Frenchwomen should bear english babies imo.

i'd still go out with her in spite of the jaw

I feel like you just want one of my brutal dora drops

Tax the bankers the bonuses and pay the soldiers footballers wages!

can't swim lads

is this more common in britain since your beaches are shit and only billionaires can afford pools?

it's part of uni culture, just suck it up and endure it for a few weeks you big wimp.

Alcohol is a serious social lubricant, if he's outgoing and affable he could make friends without clubbing but I doubt that's the case.

do one you youngun

>just move to america

hmmmm yes this is very simple to do if you're a white brit

NO

it's fucking IMPOSSIBLE

can't believe she is only 18

Epic meme response lad well done XD

Imagine living in one of these runt "frat' houses drinking coca cola can size beers

google it lol

*tuts*
I do.......... not not for that post, I was keeping it 100 there (as blacks say)

You've got some nuts showing your face here billy big balls

KING BILLYS ON THE WALL

no everyone goes for swimming lessons at the local baths in year 3

only niggers and uber runts can't swim

pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=122920413

Dude tallboys lmao

i tried, but i prefer to read opinions from pirates here

I really like the 9-3 Viggen and it's on my list of cars to get, but they're pretty rare and they're probably going to get rarer

I'm only 19 now so I've got a few years before insurance drops quite a bit.

We get taught to swim in primary and then again in secondary if you were too much of a spazz

>friend just left for uni
>calls it "college"
>lives on rez
>trying to get into a frat
>always snapchats him "crushing" a 355 ml can

maximum runt

there's something kind of offputting about Mexicans and other spics not just refusing to give (You)s, but refusing to give any number clue at all to show which post they're replying to

genuine autism

why do americans dress so fucking badly

grew up 5 mins from the local swimming pool and never learned to swim lol

>I've been a single mum for 13 years to my now 13 year old beautiful daughter...

hmmmm, maybe you could work both in

Was this a themed party? I'm finding it hard to believe all these dorks are wearing the same exact thing unironically

the floor around the beer pong table always gets sticky

...

355ml what the fuck are you serious

I'd love to drink yanks under the table

She's not fucking 31, 41 maybe

the other guy hit the nail on the head

sweatshirts are just jumpers for nonces

FACT: the pound is the most powerful currency in the world

The latin generals are next level lad

>people that think a larger serving of beer is more 'manly'

you are a turbo-runt.

>DUDE I TOTALLY SLAMMED A SIXER LAST NIGHT

What is it with spics and the Fanning pigs?

top lad. never get a soft top variant of the 9-3 or ill roll you down.

i see at least 4 9-3's a day in my city but rarely any viggens :(

you're the weirdo that never leaves his room and people just say hi to when they see you to not make it too awkward

smash and dash

literally don't even get drunk off an entire bottle of vodka

can't wait to go back to uni and absolutely fucking destroy everyone with my dangerously high alcohol tolerance

355ml is the standard north american can size for beers and soft drinks and the like

...

when brexit happened everybody said that the world would suffer an economic collapse haha

snapped my banjo string

simpsons season 7 is my second favourite season

Just wait for the next invasion.

fucking hell lad you're cool

where can i get molson canadian in the UK

want to reminisce

But a new set at the music store silly

bit minging

DUDE I TOTALLY SLAMMED A FRICKIN TALLBOY DOWN MY GOSH DARN GULLET LAST NIGHT AT THE FRAT PARTY I WAS WASTEDDD DUDE!

OMEGA ZETA FRATHOUSE BABY!!

Ordered bogof domino's last night
Eating the other one cold now

yeah wouldn't think of getting a soft top anything unless it's a super classic car

there's only 2 of them on autotrader, one of them is a softtop, and the other has 200k miles on it
certainly a bit cheaper than they used to be, but I still wouldn't be able to afford the insurance on one

blacks and bays
and dapples and greys
all the pretty little horses

How

t. closet ameriboo

I can't wait, hehehe.

want a job lads

want to move on in life

Y-yea. Jjj-just a joke haha. Meme

My dad OWNS the dealership

molson is garbo mate

houston is a nigger city, but despite of that, they have a NASA installation there

>100% TWs today, topped off by this email:

>Hi
>I liked your profile and Im interested in booking a 2or3hrs session.
>would you do lots of kicking in the balls, if so would you do this for most of the time and how hard would you kick them.

>also would you do any cock biting if so how hard, if so how much of it would you try and bite.
>u happy to really go for it
>Maybe we could a scenario for this and I wanted something else too
>Thanks

runt life

what is a good tv show on netflix that i can watch

seen breaking bad, stranger things, sons of anarchy

rate my list of cars I want to buy and are a realistic purchase lads

BMW E46 330Ci
Volvo C30
C70
V70 T5/R
V60 Polestar
850 T5
480
VW Type 3 Squareback or Fastback
Scirocco
Audi A3 TDI
Jaguar S-Type V8
Saab 9-5 Aero
9-3 Viigen
Mercedes E430 Estate
Mazdaspeed 6
FIAT Panda 4X4
Honda S2000
Ford Mondeo ST-220

tried to fuck my mattress

here you go lad

*hurls a jobbie at you*

wahhheeyyyyy

not reading a word of this

stranger things

how many of you lads are /ck/, /diy/, /out/, /fit/, /o/, Cred Forums and /k/?

REAL masculine interests

>match of the day 2
>united lost

Always sunny in phillidelphia is God tier

runtmobiles

good song
youtube.com/watch?v=ydAIdVKv84g

fuck off you runt, as bad as sports-fans.

What even is the difference between a jumper and a sweatshirt. This is kind of like a jumper.

Hmm.

Cred Forums rarely talks about sailing

Everything except /o/ and /ck/

/heem/ 4 lyfe

>no mx5
not even fucked off son, just dissapointed

Who here /patrician/?

/brit/, /bleep/, /fit/, /lit/, /ck/

Ah yes, the Dennis Trident is much more to your tastes

Trust a yank not to know what a banjo string is, I bet you don't even have yours.

I am.
I'm not masculine.

Does anyone recognise this symbo

House of Cards, Fargo, The Killing, Archer, Always Sunny

only Cred Forums Cred Forums and /o/ nowadays desu la

stop saying "ameriblubber"

it hurts my feeling

post toot

the fuck is /bleep/?

tegaki

Needs more Volvos IMO

Business idea: buy a new car every year but use the majority of the money to buy it by trading in last years car

>Adolf Hitler "didn't just pick on them [Jewish people] for no reason". - Roald Dahl

haha what

Hey

Trust a runt to fall right into my trap

same thing, but 'sweatshirt' is the most unflattering word of all time and used exclusively by the geriatric

ah yes, the ultimate hairdressers car

Daredevil.

>scenes from 20 year old kids shows still make me well up

I'm an adult, why does this shit still make me react like this?

If you lads aren't trying to become the peak of masculinity in physicality, intelligence, mentality and social ability then your a lost cause

This is why white people are considered soft these days, we were a different breed 100 years ago

music plebs listen to

who /gettingshitfacedoffbiered'or/ on a sunday night here?

any man in

>pards

loooool

Same model of car though mate, that's how you fully execute such a brilliant plan

good lad

-_-

Why would you say that when you know that I just used that word :///////

>Heinrich and the corpse factory

Fuck off, scoot'N'shoot.

Hi

Women aren't trying very hard to be traditionally feminine either these days

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/German_Revolution_of_1918–19

Well he wasn't wrong.

fs lads girl from tinder I went on a date with unmatched me lads

t. Mickey 'statistical IQ of 93' Rorke

>An outcall to a hotel last night with a lovely guy who wanted me to tell him how his wife gets gangbanged by black guys. An easy booking. Didn't even have to have sex ;D

What gimmicky/useful thing can I buy online I can put in my room/house/wear around preferably under a tenner

what word?

>that grill
mate even if theyre being ironic they truly are benders

i wouldve said rx7 but youd need to get a full refit on the engine and potential chassis work done

Me

a union jack

new

did it go badly or are you just uglier in real life?

stitch-up bruv

none of your beeswax

Would you rather:
>A gf who has been a prostitute (but has now quit)
Or
>A gf who has almost exclusively fucked black men
?

I'd love an RX-7 but yeah the maintenance possible puts me off

Big deal, doesn't mean we aren't intelligent. An IQ test is a very skewed measure of intelligence and is specific to one very type of intelligence: Logic.

PS a Jew invented IQ tests and Jews apparently have the highest IQ of all

coalburners are all really trashy, would rather date an ecort

>An IQ test is a very skewed measure of intelligence
It really isn't lad