Singapore thread: SPG edition

Singapore thread: SPG edition

Feel free to ask any questions about Singapore life, employment and education.

No bullying pls

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what singaporeans do when they want to enjoy nature?
does Singapore have any mountain?

Which of the two languages (Chinese & English) is more dominant over the other for the average Singaporean?

What is the official language of Singapore?

What's the most singaporean thing about life in singaporea

Official language of documentation and examination: English
Commonly spoken language: English
Historical National language: Malay

Bullshit. You're all Chinese subordinates.

We just go to Malaysia, where there are forests.
Or we just fly to Japan
No natural disasters at all.

Are we still doing this, kek

We have some nature reserves, it's pretty big and nature-ish. We also have a botanic garden that has all sorts of weird flowers, trees and shit.

Tallest """"mountain"""" here is Bukit Timah hill at 163m. Amazing.

Older people generally prefer Mandarin, youngsters prefer English.

4 official languages: English, Mandarin, Malay, Tamil.

Can't deny that tbqh

Sure, we have two of the top 20 universities in the world
>Official language of examination
Makes a whole lot of sense right?

No we actually hate PRC Chinese, their all so vulgar and loud, I want to set them on fire

I'm trying to flee violence in america. I have a job here, and am semi-skilled with a decent amount of money.

I just don't want to get shot by niggers.

how can I make it over there? I speak 2 other languages and basic chinese, but want to improve.

Is Singapore white?

Some areas have more white, some areas less.
My area is flooded with Frenchies, so yea.

But we are still chinks tho :^)
And I have some dank PRC friends from back in my poly days, those that stay around and attempt to integrate instead of heading back to China are okay in my book.

But those immigrants that come here... Fuck that tbqh.

Skilled in what? We are a technological and research hub and we currently have a lack of engineers. Many MNCs here too so you'll find plenty of whites here as well.

Who would say has more political influence in Singapore...

Yellow or white?

Do you have an engineering degree or at least a basic hard science degree? Best would be chem eng degree, those are in high demand

Prime minister is yellow, most of the cabinet is yellow. Our deputy prime minister is a poo in loo though.

Only a few MPs (members of parliament) are white, if you could even say that. They're Eurasians 2bh.

Rank your neighbours!

aren't singaporean chinese already extremely skilled in materials science and stem already?

I am just a low level salesman, hence I said semi-skilled.

No particular group. This based dude made it such that no ethnic group has special treatment. There is affirmative action towards some minorities, but we're very much meritocratic.

7/10, thanks for accomodating my vacation spot, have a house in Perth
Forgot the picture

Most of us fall for the "Study Business for a Good Future!" meme tbqh.

t. Business School Student

>low level salesman
Yeah I don't think that's going to cut it here... Most English teachers here aren't even whites 2bh. You're better off looking for employment in other SEA countries where they'll hire you just for being white.

>Not medicine

I'm genuinely interested in traveling to Singapore for like a week long holiday or something of the like. I've only visited other western nations(Canada, Ireland, New Zealand, and Norway).

As is my main concern with traveling to any foreign country(short of Canada) what are some tips you can give me on not making an ass of myself.

Why does this American care about whites in Singapore so much?

Where is singapore?

Don't go to the Casino and splurge all your money

Don't be an asshole to the taxi driver or anyone in general.

Go to the Hawker centres, try all the food, they don't look as disgusting as some exotic japanese dishes

Don't go to the Mcdonalds, Subways, etc. no point going there as a tourism trip.

If you want you can go to Universal Studios Singapore in Sentosa.

Secret CHEEKI BREEKI spot that's not visible on the world map.

>Tfw not smart enough
>Tfw not in uni yet
Pls no underage

We're pretty western ourselves 2bh, everyone here speaks English (Singlish 2bh) and signs are in English, medium of education is English etc. etc.

>making an ass of myself
Just don't look down on the locals here tbqh. Most of us are quite insecure because of "Foreign Talents" (who aren't even white half the time) competing for jobs with us.

Otherwise just behave as you would in any other western countries.

>Pic related

Based Newton Food Centre

wasn't expecting that.

I guess I'll choose another country to flee to. singapore just seemed like the most stable country in asia.

Nah, I'm 18, planning to go into Medicine, just need to see my As, sigh, A level's a drag.

I thought you said ur in business school? Or did I misinterprete it?

I'm interested in a SGP citizenship. Is it easy for an American university student at a top school get a citizenship?

Poly student 2bh. Should've been more productive, now I've graduated with one of the lowest GPA in my course FUGGGG :DDD

If I can get into NTU I happy liao. Pls no SMU.

>A levels
Hey are you that NJC guy who has his As in 50 days or something?
You should be studying senpai ;_;

And yes it is, we're constantly importing foreign talents from other countries. Getting permanent residency is easier than citizenship tho.

Define top school
MIT? Caltech? Stanford?...

Hello Singapore!

Somewhere near a Cornell level school.

Umm no? There was an NJC guy, damn, surprised that people from that school actually visit this site. Literally the mug even after you burn out school.

Watching some spanish videos most of them say the secret to singapore's transition from a dumpster into a 1st world nation was giving the death sentence to druggies, corrupts, rapists and other criminals and ruling with an iron hand even with stuff like the chew gum ban.
Some others say this is bullshit and they just did it the natural way (through education, employment, etc)
Which one is it?

So be polite and explore new cuisines? Shit son, I do that everywhere I go. I'm also kinda concerned about all the random shit you can get stopped/fined by the police for(gum chewing, spitting, jaywalking, etc). Is this just a meme or are all the "WEIRD SINGAPORE LAWS" articles telling the truth?

Nah, no ones gonna jail you for bringing chewing gum. It's a meme law, it's literally the remnants of the assfuckery from early governance, which the government is too lazy to remove as it is such an insignificant law that it's just there.

>JC life

Mix of both 2bh. LKY (the dictator) is based AF, although some don't agree with his policies. Our government officials are paid a fuckload though (our PM is paid 2.2million a year, Obama only 400k a year) so we're pretty much incorruptible 2bh.

We were also blessed with being right on a busy trading route, so there's that.

Kek, I'm pretty sure literally everyone above the age of 12 have chewed gum here before. PRCs spit on the streets all the time. Jaywalking is fine everybody does that.

I see what you did there senpai

Well JC is the easiest way to get into Medicine whether local or overseas, probably overseas cause NUS is like insane.

do the chinese in singapore realize that the malays are just waiting for a chance to slit their throats malaysian/indonesian style? or have they forgotten about all of that?

what do you guys think of niggers?

Well, if that is true. We've already put them all in the police force, main military units are consists of other races.

As for niggers.
Yea they're fine

The plan is to fuck off once you're done with NS, study overseas, get a job there and never come back. Feasible?

>mfw police is majority malays
>mfw firefighters are majority malays

I like nigger music 2bh
pls no bully

Well it takes like 8 years to complete an MBBS, plus extra 3-5 years depending on your specialization to finish that. So most likely, will take flights back to visit family tho, cause that's important, at least to me

uh oh

they create the ghettos, my friend. you are naive,but I'm not lecturing you, just curious.

try looking up old philadelphia architechture. we literally built acropolises and greek stadiums in the city.

>like nigger music
I'm a little triggered. every time I hear it where I live I know someone is about to get shot. literally.

Never happened here tho, probably the niggers that actually make it here from the US are like law obedient educated ones.


>parents want to retire overseas because "SG is too expensive"
What did they mean by this?

Niggers aren't rich enough to trawl overseas, the only niggers that do are doing well for themselves and by extension, doing good for society. And that's the niggers we have here.

Sarong Party Girl senpai, look it up. Just girls of Asian origins (Chinese, Malay, Indian) who are gold-diggers snugging up to whites.

Oh wew

kinda like beurette a khel in France

where can I find pics of slutty SPGs for research purposes

>wanting pics of SPGs
They're all tanned skinny bitches with chinky features.

You can do better than that François

thx for the info, buds. I hope I get to be a guest in your country-city-state within the next year

Ayy senpai if you need any more tips just hit us up

I'm not French

Hi Hong Kong

Hi Singapore

why are singapore girls so fucking ugly? you guys suffer inbreed problem like your colonists too?

That's why we get our brides from Vietnam see.

>That moment you realize that good looking girl in SK and China look like Vietnamese.

No. Stay away from our poonanis.

How hard would be for someone with virtually a native-esque level of English to participate in some sort of exchange to work or study in Singapore. I've had work experience in everal areas and have a pretty nice resume for my age (3 uni degrees, first of my class, studied around europe). Does your government set up exchanges? Would it be fun?

>in one of the top jcs in Singapore
>in the middle of fucking prelims
>still on Cred Forums instead of studying
>still no gf

How did everything go so wrong

Studying here should be pretty easy, there are exchange programs all the time.

As for work, around the same as any other developed country I guess.

>in on the top jcs
Not bad already lah, as long as you can get into a university, life's set.

>still no gf
At least you're not a kv right?

Dunno if I can even get into uni. Grades aren't good. Parents can't afford overseas without a scholarship.


Kissing virgin? Yes I am. Fucking boys' schools man

Private-u? At least it's something. The only uni I can go is uniqlo fuck my life.

>boys' school
OH FUCKING LOL why are there only alphas and betas in boys' schools and nothing in between?

>why are there only alphas and betas in boys' schools and nothing in between

Not just that but you actually can't even tell which is which until girls come into the picture during jc and everyone's social life suddenly explodes. Out of nowhere you have skinny assholes wrecking pussy. Poly is the place to be.

>tfw biz student in NP
>tfw clubbing every week
>tfw only rekt 4 pussies in my poly life

Where did it go so wrong.

t. Skinny Asshole

Bump for dinner!

How's ur prelims son?
BBC/D fuck my shit up senpai

They are good looking.

How do I get a Japan waifu?

If I want to move there as a doctor will I get a good salary?

>In JC
>Want a gf
That's ur problem, wait till Uni lah, just study for A levels, more important

つ Amazon

If your country is not majority Islamic, what does the crescent on your flag symbolize?

Probably, there's many people who want to study medicine here because of that.

How do so many pleb-tier JC guys pull in 7/10 minimum gfs???

Represents a "young nation ascending". Bullshit I say, it's just to appease our majority Malay-Muslim neighbours, Malaysia and Indonesia.

Medicine is a cool meme because you can find work anywhere.

Yeap, and so is business, but they pay's good, can't fault that.

What we need now is engineers 2bh.

Want to do engineering. Should I join combat engineers in SAF, sign on, and somehow become MoD ?

Only if you're planning to go to university, they'll probably even sponsor you senpai.

>Should I
Are you one of those new batch fucks who get to choose their vocation?

why is chewing gum illegal?

Because people got triggered and jammed into locks and sensitive equipment, fucking shit up.

Some fuckers decided it will be ebin to dispose off their used gum on lift buttons, inside letterboxes, even inside people's fucking keyholes.

Then finally some vandals decided it will be funny to trigger subway trains by disposing their gum on the doors, and that was that.

It's just a prank bro

Because JC kids tend to be from richer families?

JC kids should be raped

Oh yeah that would make sense. But poly students are actually richer. I know some people who stay at Sentosa Cove, Orchard Residences and drives a landrover ;_;

Opens table at Zouk every week, nice guy.

It'll be nice to see the west turn into sjwland while you stay in the Far East desu. The prospects are really good, but people tell me it'll be dull as hell.

Well I know a PJC kid who's family has houses in Sentosa Cove and several penthouses both local and overseas

no it's not. Your bullshit actually affects us, evident from LHL implementing positive discrimination in our presidency requirements, and the bullshit race baiting crap on tv .

They taught me that in school, don't fk with women

I've been seeing a Singaporean girl on and off for the past few months. She's a real cutie but she's a bit of an SJW which makes it difficult to spend a lot of time around her.

What salary can you live a good life on in singapore?
Would you recommend a singaporean girl?
Changi airport is the best btw

Also, is singapore a conspiracy between china and the western world to create a super banking territory where the people speak english AND mandarin?

We are now in a race against the West, if they will collapse before they infect us with SJWery.

Every Singaporean should support progressiveness in the West to accelerate its effects.

I blame America for this.

$4000 should be okay.
No. Very high maintenance.
Thanks, I like Suvarnabhumi Airport.

That makes a lot of sense tbqh.

Way off. British ditched us when the Japanese came, then we got butchered. Then, we're like fuck Britain, we don't need you when after the war they wanted to come back. Then, Lee Kuan Yew zerg rush Singapore's economy, then that's how we got here today, true story, my grandparents can confirm

Would you mind deleting this post?


Not sure what information I'm supposed to glean from this image

Thanks for your imports, Aus land.

Please do! I will support this. I just hope the bullshitting here will be cease in few more years and I can actually move on.
btw, have you been to Sibu, Sarawak state? It's like Singapore, but the opposite.

Oh this is in Singapore. Why would anyone pay more for produce grown in China?

>It's like Singapore, but the opposite
What did he mean by this?

Idk, i usually buy Aus fruits.

>have you been to Sibu, Sarawak state
Do you want to leave the malaysian federation and join Singapore, and become our second state ?

Why are literally all the singaporeans at my college so nerdy? Are slackers just not a thing in high school there?

The more I research Singaporean society the more you guys look like lawful evil. Seems like a very oppressive culture with a thin veneer of progressiveness and anyone who descents gets unusually forcefully struck down.

No wonder I don't hear shit about Singapore, ever.

Please continue supporting our fruit industry

There's a reason why they're studying in America you know. The rest of us slackers just can't make it tbqh. There's many of us, just that we don't go out much.

sure, unless ur government starts allowing GM shit

Links to evil-ish stuff? I've always wanted to argue against singapore but most of the stuff like death penalties or military service seem pretty defensible.

I'm pretty sure most countries allow GM to an extent these days, it's almost impossible to avoid unless you go to farmers markets and such. Blame Monsanto.

Recommended places to visit and good restaurants in Singapore?

you can literally get whipped for littering

Nah, I'd prefer to be in my own Isle of Borneo Kingdom.
>will be forgotten by being a far far away state from federal government centre. Learnt through hard lessons
>Trust no more outsider because they are greedy pigs

Most of those posting under the US flag on Cred Forums, are self-hating whites and progressive millennials of the following type:

For them, death penalties and military service are the anti-thesis of a free society

There is nothing that is overtly "evil. It's all subtle corruption and over-reaction to any cultural descent or challenge to the status quo, which in my opinion is far more pernicious. I've know signaporeans and they come off as brainwashed-tier almost like north koreans.

Again, it's a thin vaneer of progressiveness that irks me the most. It's like they adopted western values only to save face with the rest of the world.

Nice meme.

You get a fine and have to serve corrective work order, that's all.

Let me guess, you're also one of those guys who think you'll get whipped for bringing one strip of gum into Singapore too, yes?

Doesn't America's beacon of freedom in the middle east, Israel, have compulsory conscription too.
On top of other countries like Finland and Germany and South Korea



>It's like they adopted western values only to save face with the rest of the world
singaporeans are some of the most backward, backwater superstitious retards I've ever met. They don't believe in freedom of speech, expression, human rights etc. It's like a condescending ruse they're playing with the west because that's how they get access to the goods

Singapore is home to many microaggressions against homos and transpeople, homosexuals and non-Chinese. There is more than enough ammunition here.

Has this thread become a daily general?
Good to hear as I'm very interested in Singaporean culture!

> Again, it's a thin vaneer of progressiveness that irks me the most. It's like they adopted western values only to save face with the rest of the world.
im sure they dont care what a stupid fatfuck thinks about them

Everything can be found here, it's an interesting article tbqh.

t. Totally not a co-author

And those in that video are the very people who demand """justice""" for """""innocent""""" Palestinians.

Thanks for the goods, I guess.

Thank you, I love Japanese culture!
>Singaporean culture


>Singaporean culture
>adopted from the west
pick one

I don't care what riceballs care about, pablito. Now kill yourself for being a a third-world nigger and uttering anything to me that isn't a request for aid.

> freedom of speech, expression, human rights etc.

All these have gotten America, is a thick black Mexican cock up the anus.

Anyway, you cunts are changing the definition so often it is impossible to keep up. It used to mean, don't throw people in jail arbitrarily. Now, if you do not bend over and spread your ass for progressives, you are denying their human rights. Ten years ago and Singapore was actually more liberal and sick of conservatism, but today, no one wants to play your stupid game anymore.

It is pretty weird challenging them on the authoritarianism. Literally every single one will shrug off the specifics, and say "We do things differently in Singapore and it works for us - we're a small country and everyone accepts we have to be careful - teehee!", even when you're complaining about the state literally suppressing democracy or the typical huge levels of inter-asian racism.

Hey I don't know about America, but we do things differently in Singapore and it works for us - we're a small country and everyone accepts we have to be careful - teehee!

Americans only care about addressing racism in only the superficial aspects, at the same time as niggers chimp out in their cities

>Malaysian culture
>Getting ripped off by government
>Being corrupt as fuck
>Being constantly inferior to Singapore and being sad

Pick all.

Any Malay Singaporean here?

I heard Singaporean girls are EXTREMELY thirsty for the white cock, how high would my chances of getting laid with CUTE chick over there be?

100% if you are not a German autist and agree to marriage immediately after sex

Would I have to sex her in front of the parents?
Also, would she want to marry in order to get out of Singapore or to keep me there?
I have no applicable skills that would grant me a job in SG.

I only know once girl from Singapore and she is 146cm and way too cute to even think about sexing her. She's just too tiny and innocent looking.

Like in all countries, there are loose girls and conservative ones, so it really depends. Although I'm sure your typical Singaporean ah lian would want to stay here rather than immigrate to some cold place where she can't speak the local language.

>grant me a job in SG
Why not just come here on vacation, Hans? Just hit the clubs, buy some drinks for the chicks and you're set. Although if you just want to fuck some Asian qts, you're better off going to other countries tbqh.

>Why not just come here on vacation, Hans?
Yes but you said I can only sex if I marry.

To be honest I would prefer to fuck a CUTE Malaysian or Indonesian girl wearing a Hijab.

Sorry, I was not the poster you replied to.

You can totally sex without marry there's loose girls everywhere, why would SG be a difference, lol.

>CUTE Malaysian or Indonesian girl
Malay girls are looser, yes, but they're not the ones wearing the hijabs. You want to ask the lads here, Mueller.

ASEAN is never helpful when it comes to making a sexytime happen.

>notice how defensive and touchy they get at criticism of their shithole country

i'm starting to believe it. you all just reinforced what the others were saying by being this assblasted

Here's your (You) lah!

Just be alpha or have money and you can fuck any girl on this planet, herr Kraut

So this is how Singapore gets bantered, interesting. That really showed us.

Singapore is a "FINE" city hehe

Ya lah!

do girls from singapore have cute feet?


Stop bullying durians

SG warship a cute

I unironically like durians tbqh. Do you, Lithuania?

Very petite and small, most of them have painted toenails as well. Due to our culture of wearing slippers/flip-flops, their soles might be a bit dirty though.

Generally they take good care of their feet, 10/10 would smell and lick again.

Never had the pleasure of eating one.
Are they sweet?

They smell very pungent, but yes they are incredibly sweet!

>Very petite and small, most of them have painted toenails as well. Due to our culture of wearing slippers/flip-flops, their soles might be a bit dirty though.
>Generally they take good care of their feet, 10/10 would smell and lick again.

Do you have any dedicated SG foot forums to share with a friend?

No doubt they have slightly modified poland flag.

Chinkapore girls are ultimate looser.
Requires loads of cash. UNLESS...
... you are white, that would be exception.

And the latest trend, zika'd frog babies.
>locally emerged
>tries to transmit zika to neighbours

Why does your anthem sound like a Christmas carol?

Was meant to reply

Unfortunately not too many people into feet here, so no.

I agree, Malaysian Chinese girls are cuter, nicer, more humble and require less maintenance. My mother was right, I should've gotten a Malaysian gf instead!

Ironically, the songwriter, Zubir Said, was a Muslim, kek

both bullshit.
they were just lucky because of their strategic location

isnt poland a strategic location aswell

Strategic location for being a battlefield, yes.

We are truly blessed with incompetent and corrupt neighbours, a natural deep habour, and the Straits of Malacca.

notice the butturt sardonic reply to everything because too inarticulate to discuss otherwise.

Everything foreigners say strikes too close to home for them, but because they live in a culture of no-confrontation and social ital oppression they take offense to everything.

Ahaha sings confirmed for thin skinned beta pussies

Why are you still baiting for (You)s here?

Do THICC girls exist in Singapore?

Also, are you guys all rich? Singapore is really expensive so how can you afford living there?

NO! Hands off on any malaysian grills including chinese.
Zika not welcome.

How's that inferiority complex working out for ya, cunt eyes?

you can try and obfuscate by claiming samefag as much as you like, but you aren't fooling anyone.

im just pointing that out
its partially right, but you understand yourself the US does'nt just rely on location right

Yeap. If you're into them, good. Most guys here aren't.

No, not all of us are rich. It's expensive, yes but it's still passable. Its cost of living is not in a league of its own, rather it's more on par with cities like Tokyo, London, New York or San Francisco.

Ahmad, we both have dengue leh, why you only care zika :^)

>t. Son of Malaysian immigrants

>Giving (You)s so freely and easily

How does Singapore compare with Hong Kong, for a guy that has been to Hong Kong.

Is it possible to get a white collar job there without a degree, or a fake one?


>dengue kills the host
>Zika will continue over generation

Zika containment dome over zikapore when?

Do you guys support the death penalty on drugs?
I think it's pretty amazing and I wish a lot more retarded drug tourists would get shot over there.

Ministry of Manpower will rape your ass, so don't even try.

Poverty containment dome over poorasia when ?

Weather: Singapore is like HK during summer, year round.
Traffic: We both drive on the left, but it's a tad bit better here. Public transport systems are world class in both cities
English: Our English is better than HK, marginally.
What else do you want to know?

>fake degree
Knowing Singapore... Don't even attempt to pull that shit here senpai.

WTF I hate Zikapore now!!!

I do 2bh, but do note that only drug traffickers get the death sentence for providing people with means of attaining drugs. Drug abusers do not get the death sentence.


Congratulation guys, we did it

Congratulations, you had enough bandwidth to make that post.



More like /asean/ did it senpai, but it's kinda dead now 2bh

Flips are gone, but at what price?

Have you ever watched a public caning?
Has a member of your family ever received a proper ol caning?


It looks something like this

Well I was in secondary school (middle school equivalent of the US), where I saw a classmate with a really shitty attitude, went as far as to shout and abuse the teacher, disrupting the entire length of the class. He got canned in front of all of us tho. Sure taught him a good lesson, fucking dumb shit deserved it.

What's the work culture like in singapore? And do you pay much in taxes?
I do chem eng, would you be willing to give me a job?

Would you love to cane a juicy ass once?


Foreigners' income tax rates are at 15%.
Work culture is generally more westernised than the infamous work culture in South Korea or Japan, but still Asian enough such that hierarchy must be respected and a certain degree of bootlicking is still expected.

>chem eng
We have a shortage of engineers in the country, come on down!

No thanks I'm good. If it's in the bedroom, then that's a different story :3

I'm alright with bootlicking, was just worried it might be like japan were you have to spend hours at the office for no real purpose.
Not sure I could handle the weather though, is it very humid?

Also nice dubs

We understand that it's different for westerners, so we won't really bat an eyelid if you were to knock off on time, although you might see your co-workers still rushing through paperwork at 5.30pm.

Hell, who knows. You might even end up in an all-white office! I've seen enough bars in the CBD areas that were packed with only white people, kek.

Extremely humid. Relative humidity is always above 50%, and the temperature never gets lower than 24c. Sometimes, it gets to a high of 34c with 60% humidity.

Personally, I spend 22 hours of my day in air-conditioned comfort, so I can't really complain...

Daily reminder:
>Frequently go over borders for low price daily consumer products and petrols
>relies heavily on imported cheap raw water supplied by "poorasia"
>live in rich housing, made in Bangladeshi
>tax and summons evasions, go back to zikapore and "I am safe!" from Malaysian authorities

You'll be begging for world attention if we proceed with the canal projects few more years to come, once the internal conflicts have been resolved. Just wait--
Oh wait, how about extra high petrol charge for any Singaporean plate no.vehicles?
Or maybe, once any goods, even gums, leaves Johor borders in possession of any Singaporean passport holder, mandatory high tax duties for every goods.
Modified bottled water? Easy, just make rumours of zika'd in the water.
Or maybe, imposed special tax for any tanker or ships en route to zikapore. And only zikapore route as it's destination.
Oh my god, I will be rich in no time just by taxes from my already rich neighbour!
But as usual, "muh island is small and please pity us", so we give the handicap. We are not stupid, you see.

Please go back to Malaysia once you've done your business over there or migrate to Aus.

>Please go back to Malaysia
I love Malaysia! Idk what's so bad about it tbqh. Malaysia has:

>My entire family
>Cheap and nicer food
>Bigger houses
>An actual countryside
>Cameron Highlands
>Friendlier people

Malaysia DOES NOT have:

My parents are going back to Malaysia once they've retired, is that good enough?

2/10 bait

Do you have a cute Malaysia Chabor waiting for you?

I love Joyce Chu!
>Some guy commits suicide at 1:40, kek

I have qt Malaysian cousins, but no qt waiting for me in my small kampung in bumfuck Perak because we've made a childhood promise ;_;

>Malaysia DOES NOT have:

>My parents are going back to Malaysia once they've retired, is that good enough?
Of course. But please make sure your physical and mental health are heavily screened. Just in case zika might follows you.
Malaysia welcomes anyone who can contribute it's progress in terms of urbanization and intellectuals. The government are kind of crazy right now but once the tumour have been removed, it will become great again.
Since you are in zikapore, please steal all the degrees and give back to Malaysia. We really need those.

I just wish she had an upper lip.
Her teethy smile gets annoying after a while.
Would smash the Hijab QT on the right @ 2:22 TBPH

If I spit my gum on the ground will i die?

It will be extremely painful

B-but but we're all [spoiler]chinks[/spoiler]

>Me in the middle

Any of you guys going hard on sepak takraw


That only applies if you are going back to West Malaysia.

In East Malaysia, chinks are welcomed, especially if they're not the typical snub chink. (Imagine the Indo-Chink)


>Relative humidity is always above 50%, and the temperature never gets lower than 24c. Sometimes, it gets to a high of 34c with 60% humidity.
wew, not sure I could handle it
Fucking whiteness preventing me from working in exotic places

Are these lyrics legit?
Malaysians I know irl are really nice, are singaporeans similar to malaysians personality wise?

Give it a go lad, believe in yourself!

>Are these lyrics legit
Yes, and Joyce's such a qt :3

>are singaporeans similar to malaysians personality wise
We share the same language, religions, customs and food. Singaporeans are more arrogant just because we're more successful and rich, but still not thick-skinned enough to not go to Malaysia to steal their petrol.

No, we're evil. Please go to Singapore instead.

How about kiasu?
Or maybe become a failure and kys where zikapore police wrote in report as "domestic accidents"?
(hence not being in top of world suicide list)


Personally, why do you like hijabis of ASEAN? You've got plenty of Turks hijabis, yes?

Who is she raging at for calling her korean? She's qt tho I agree

Don't be to hard on yourself, malaysians are lovely. Like innocent children struggling through in a world full of sin

>kys where zikapore police wrote in report as "domestic accidents"?
This 2bh, I heard of some soldiers shooting themselves in camp, not even reported in the news. Covered up by Mindef, $20,000 ($1000 for every year of his life) sent to the parents. Brutal.

>why do you like hijabis of ASEAN?
Malays are cuter mah :3

She's not really raging per se, more like its her composer who wants to make a controversial song (Namewee, check out his productions. He's been in trouble with Malaysian authorities several times before).

>You've got plenty of Turks hijabis, yes?
Yes, but Turks are ugly and Turks.
SEA Hijabis are QT.

>Who is she raging at for calling her korean? She's qt tho I agree
People kept commenting that she looks Korean and everything about her is fake so they made that song for the LULZ.


you... you gay bro?

What is the official dominant language of Singapore and why is it Chinese?

>malaysians are lovely
>innocent children struggling through in a world full of sin
We're the most evil and corrupt and poor and everything else not existed in other Asean countries.

Malaysia is not:
>culturally diverse & historically (Indonesia)
>rich (Singapore)
>transparent gommies (Singapore)
>relevant language worth learning (Indonesia)
>superior master race (Philippines)
>rich with oil (Brunei)
>known for qt waifu grills (Vietnam)
>known for qt traps and liberal progressive lifestyle (Thailand)
>extremism in terms of Islamism, kiasu-ness, and equality (Indonesia, Singapore, and Thai)
>strong currency & high GDP (Singapore, Brunei)
>cheap on consumer product (Indonesia, Thailand)
>cheap on petrols/gas (Brunei)

All we have are just evil and being irrelevant. Everyone knows Indonesian language and Bali tourist traps.
Everyone knows Singapore are brilliant, top uni, clean and rich.
Everyone knows of Bruneian Sultan black gold money and the Sharia Law.
Everyone knows Thai's trap qts and gay friendly.
Everyone knows Vietnamese qt grills and order-your-own-asia-wife
Everyone knows Philippines are paradise of nature, hard on druggies, on tier of Indonesia with her orangutans and her Acheh sharia.

But everyone doesn't even know where's Malaysia on the map. The smallest Singapore could be pointed out by a mere Western and Japanese child.
We are not a holiday destination. We're just a transit. Everyone from around the world just transit through us to go for the rest of Asean.
Hence, we're evil. Please avoid at all cost.

Have a friend who's broken heart because her bf commit suicide (he's Singaporean). Apparently something about the army. Don't really grasp into the details though

Only applies on Indonesia. Please go for Indonesian hijabis

He's bisexual. Singapore was progressive with qt traps before though.

>Apparently something about the army
When was this? Some guy shot himself in the head in Sembawang camp last year, pretty gnarly :/

Only it's not, it's English though.

OK give me one fucking definite answer:



Hello, Toni.

Old Chinese + Old Chinese = Chinese dialects
Old Chinese + Young Chinese = Mandarin
Young Chinese + Young Chinese = English

Old Malays + Old Malays = Malay
Old + Malays + Young Malays = Malay
Young Malay + Young Malay = Malay

Old Indian + Old Indian = Tamil
Old Indian + Young Indian = Tamil
Young Indian + Young Indian = English

The lingua fraca here is English. When 2 people of different races interact, it's in English. I speak Mandarin to my parents, who speak a Chinese dialect with one another, and English with my siblings.

I speak a mix of English and Mandarin with my friends, English being the dominant language

I speak English as much as possible, only when the shopkeeper is Chinese do I speak Mandarin with them.

Everyone is encouraged to speak English with one another except during mother tongue lessons. Still, poorer-educated people hang around their own race and speak in their own languages.

Lingua Fraca in Malaysia is Malay, so when a Chinese and an Indian interact, it's in Malay. Might be English in KL, but in rural areas, it's Malay. Chinese dialects are more common in Malaysia, so you have Chinese kids speaking to one another and their parents in whatever dialect they speak. Hardly anyone speak English on a regular basis.

Will this do?

You people are fucking WEIRD.

Multi-culturalism at its best :DDDD

Ludwig, it depends on the occasion.

Formal (Malay, English, Mandarin (if audience are mostly Chinese), Tamil (if audience are mostly Indians)
Daily basis (Chinese dialects, Malay state dialects, Tamil, Bumi's state dialects, Manglish, bahasa pasar/rojak)

I would suggest you to learn Malay, basic Mandarin (for haggling) and improvised your English a little bit to suit local Manglish.

It wouldn't be a surprise if a person here are multilinguals.

I can speak English and Mandarin fluently only :( My dialect and my Malay needs brushing up.

Malaysians can speak their dialect, Malay and passable English :(

>tfw only bilingual


>But everyone doesn't even know where's Malaysia on the map.
I know where
Just because i use Singapore as guide



Tell me about the orchids.

And how do you feel about having only the second largest container port in the world?


At first glance, we already know who's local Chinese or not. :D
>Cina balik China applies to Chinese dialect monolinguals
>Banana applies to Singlish/Manglish monolinguals
>Cina kecek Kelate applies to multilinguals and are welcomed here! (they're despised by monolinguals Chinese though)
I'm not so sure on how bilinguals are perceived. Maybe worse.

Told you, I am an irrelevant transit terminal. Please go to Singapore or Indonesia. Please.

Idk man, they're pink and lovely and nice to look at???

And FUCK Shanghai tbqh.


>Cina babi balik ke Cina!
I thought this is for PRCs :o
>tfw your grandparents only spoke Chinese dialect and hardly any Malay
Bilinguals in what language? Is it true that there are more and more Mandarin and Malay bilinguals nowadays, or are Chinese students not even bothering with Malay at all? (preparing for the inevitable flight to Australia and all)

-> 臺灣是天堂。

/singapore/ and /pinoy/ needs to go back to /asean/ la its sad and lonely tbqh.


不同意,來新加坡或馬來西亞才懂什麽是夏季 tb.h
請上載多些腳 ;_;

Very comfy here 2bh, I still lurk /asean/ tho :3 I can never leave our /asean/ friends behind lad

t. kawan awak

>請上載多些腳 ;_;




>I thought this is for PRCs
Not necessarily. Includes local Chinese that actually brings PRCs worker here. (since babies of local Chinese are declining)
Malays hates this trends (thinking it's another invasion of China), but from both sides of Chinese and Malays, there are uninformed people assuming things. Hence the racial tension.
So Malays hates Chinese and Chinese hates Malays kind of thing.

Pairings of any major national language. >Chinese + English
>Chinese + Tamil
>Chinese + Malay

>there are more and more Mandarin and Malay bilinguals nowadays
Becoming less and actually rare jewels.

>are Chinese students not even bothering with Malay at all? (preparing for the inevitable flight to Australia and all)
Most of young gen, yes. Manglish all the way. Some are even a hardcore banana because of the high level of kiasu-ness.

instagram la

Kinda hot Hans

Oh yeah, there's that "CINA BABI, JANGAN CABARKAN HAK AKU!" meme. Same here 2bh, Malays having more babies, Chinese having less. Yet Malays are still scared of being rendered extinct by Chinese.

>Chinese + Tamil
As rare as finding a unicorn 2bh.

>Most of young gen, yes. Manglish all the way. Some are even a hardcore banana because of the high level of kiasu-ness.
>tfw young chink cousin only knows Chinese and Cantonese
>tfw I, a Singaporean Chinese, have to help him do his Malay homework
Holy balls, you're not wrong at all.

Is it true that SG is full ? I may want ot visit Sg one day just to look around and shop.

Any fine items I can take home as a souvenir?

>Any fine items I can take home as a souvenir?

Look, Zika is spreading like wildfire in ASEAN countries, here we have some documented case just last week.

How did Singapore get cucked so hard? And in what ways are not a colony of China?

Nah m8, head on down to Lucky Plaza, Orchard on a weekend. Tonnes of your female compatriots there 2bh.

>fine items
Not much 2bh, mostly the same old tourist shit you get. Shopping here is also more expensive so there's that. I can only recommend food items, but you might already have them back in Flipland sold by Chinese shops.

>cucked so hard
We decided not to pull an Israel and piss off our more powerful and populous Muslim neighbours. Certain concessions like having our national language be Malay and recognising the Malays as the indigenous population have to be given.

>not a colony of China
Most of us speak English here. There is widespread disdain of the PRC and their people here. US navy ships regularly dock in our harbours. Otherwise yeah we're like a mini-China (like HK, with a larger minority population).

I thought anyone intending to sign on gets to choose their vocation.

>2 of the top 20 unis
Which ones?

Top 20 is only american and british unis pretty much.

National University of Singapore and Nanyang Technological University. I assume he's checking via the QS rankings, in which case yes, 2 of our universities are in the top 20 of the world .

Nothing wrong with GM food tbqh.

National service for us is pointless once you sit down and think about it. The gahmen just forces propaganda down our throats and don't give us a choice.

>Singaporean """"""""""""""""culture""""""""""""""""
We have our food and Singlish I guess…

Mate a benevolent dictatorship has been proven to be objectively the best way to do things. And that was what we got.

That's like literally every country.

>QS rankings
After checking numerous rankings, QS is the only one that places singaporean universities anywhere close to the 20 mark.

>tfw I will just buy basheer bookstore to buy those artbooks.


I'll look around to see what I can get... Minus Zika.

It's all very subjective. I am of the opinion that at least NUS is a top 20 university, and NTU is a top Asian university. As for you, which ranking system would you utilise?

Durians smell sweet to me, even the bitter ones. But that may just be my weird sense of smell.

Going to bed now lads


See ya.

My sleeping hours are fucked up so see if I can stay up overnight to reset them. Worked a few times before.

Also if we're going to become a general thread what should we call ourselves? /sg/?

>British ditched us when the Japanese came

no we didnt, we just got fucking wrecked

Like you mentioned.
It's subjective.

For National Universities, the most popular ranking is that of U.S. News

For Global Unis, I would check more than one ranking and draw conclusions from there.

Pretty much every single ranking places US unis at the very top, with the exception of QS, which is a chinese ranking and mixes things up quite a bit. Placing quite respected American unis way down.

Berkley, and Yale are way down. while in US measures they are at the level of princeton and Harvard.

QS puts a lot of asian unis as better in better positions than pretty much any measure.

Will people report you if you play music on the streets?

Nah, fucking young uns do that all the damn time! And they even sing along to it by God.

>muh racism
Yeah because pandering to non-white delusions of equality has worked out SO GREAT in America.

kill yourself, nigger

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic. Also how is the internet connection speeds there? Aussie tier?

One of the world's best desu

Morning lads


me too.

Hey I'm black
Will i be discriminated from certain places or activities?

Americans seem to be obsessed with races.

Why are mixed Asians so damn attractive?


What's the average cost of living in Singapore

Are the caning punishments for chewing gum and other normal things just a meme?

Just a meme, bro.

*rescuing this thread*

Planning to sign on SPF here. Regulars, is it true that diploma holders can now advanced to a senior rank?

American in Singapore on business here. It's a lot less first world than I expected. Hawker centres are awesome though.

>Singaporean """"""""""""""""culture""""""""""""""""
Also, don't forget about kiasu, the national identity

Stop being tsundere Sakurahime

Morning lads


Have you been to Newton Food Centre or Chomp Chomp? Best hawker centres in SG 2bh.

B-Baka niichan! Kuso

Not him but I haven't been able to find the cheapest hawker centres in SG.

There's a pretty cheap one in Bugis but I'm quite sure there's a cheaper one.

The cheap ones are usually in the heartlands, like in Woodlands, Choa Chu Kang or Paya Lebar. If it's air conditioned, it'll probably be more expensive. Cheapest I've been to is at Woodlanda Old Town, just outside the Train Checkpoint to Malaysia. It's a good place to have your breakfast before heading off to a day trip in JB, imo.

While I was there I had an old cab driver tell me Singapore is only successful because of its stability and location. He thought the place is still really corrupt, and it is super small with no resources, but because it isn't nearly as corrupt and ghetto as other neighbouring countries, Singapore prospered. MNCs need to have a location/do business somehow in SEA, and for a while Singapore was the only place you could really go (somewhat still is).

Is Malaysia rightful Singaporean clay?

>really corrupt
This 2bh. You always see us in the top few spots of anti-graft reports and rankings, but the truth is very different. Our PM is paid $2.2 million a year. Compare that to Obama at $300,000 a year. It's corruption, but state-funded corruption.

No, Singapore is rightful Malaysian clay.

Every japanese person i know who has been to singspore can't believe how singapore is 101% man made. Kek.

How many Singaporeans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, they hire cheap labour from Bangladesh and India and make them do it.

They lost all rights to claim the moment they kicked us out. It's not like we wanted independence from them at the time.

>state-funded corruption
Goes hand-in-hand with a benevolent dictatorship. I'd prefer this over the alternatives.

We just get our maids to do it.

>state-funded corruption.
I'd call it legalised corruption

Just 5 pajeet slaves

Your kind barely exists here.
Nobody above the age of 30 will be able to accept you.

As long as you don't chimp out.

I went to the big one in China Town and a couple small ones.

Hardly any blacks here 2bh. Most of them are tourists or executives.

I used to see a black man working in my firm (it's an MNC). Lad just moved from the USA, didn't have any friends. When it's lunch time he put on his earpiece and just waltz down the elevator alone, feelsbadman

Not true at all. It's complicated but the Johor Sultans still have their rightful clay in Singapore, forgot where.

>Aunt just came from MY
>Worst pimple outbreak in months
>Waiting for enlistment, no job or school
>Friends all in army, no one to go out with
>Broke up with gf 3 weeks ago
>Waking up at 3pm, sleeping at 5am
>Never leaves the house unless it's to drive my dad around

Oh God, my aunt probably thinks I'm a useless virgin NEET doesn't she??!!

Can you drive me around?kek

Get a temp job until you enlist.

Yea like driving me around
Will pay in cookies

Migrate lah!

>12 from bump limit

>Would you recommend a singaporean girl?

I can answer this one cause singaporean gf


>He's a white european who can't figure out how to fuck asian girls

Just end your life mate