Be me

wtf guys I didn't know
should I just kill myself then?

Go ask a brazil bro to help you get laid, or get an escort.

Go to Brazil

Wew lad
E
W
L
A
D
I thought blazil was one of the easiest countries to get laid

The answer is always the same: YES!

why are you still virgin at your 29s?

You live in it.

Like what the fuck man, you're 29, you probably have a job and some money to spend. Unless you want to be a wizard, fuck a whore like, tomorrow.

how does this happen?

Its not easy If you got a small dick, most girls are used to monster cocks so theyll just laugh at you and walk away. Pure girls go for successful guys, which clearly isnt op case

You might have more luck in Brazil.

By the time they find out the size of your cock it's usually too late to turn back.

>Its not easy If you got a small dick, most girls are used to monster cocks
kek

This.

In Canada for example women only like 9inch BBCs, I can't imagine how much worse it is in Brazil.

You have my utmost sympathy, Brazilanon.

You have to be trolling.

Brazil is one of the most sexually open countries in the world.

If you are really that desperate go to Cambodia or Thailand.

what is current cocklet cutoff size?

8x8 inch.

If your dick is less than this you'll never get laid

>Pure girls

wew, glad I managed to lose my virginhood when it was still 7 x 7

>tfw fat
>tfw 6.5" x 5.5" monster cock
feels good man

You got lucky

I only have a 7.5 inch penis and I'm only 186 cm here in Canada and girls wont even look at me

Feels fucking bad man

All the girls here only want Chad or Tyrone's big 11 inch cock. Even the men with 9 inch dicks here are cucks because they can't compete

top kek

>tfw fugged many girls with my 15cm cock

Dude I'm like 5'6 or 5'7 and my dick is only like 5 inches, it's like I'm a black, gay, jew, and the girls are Nazis

p sad tobehonestfamalama
just got back from my second date with a qt nurse, coitus is inevitable. why havent you walked into traffic yet and just ended it?

nah, just got lucky that I when I had my sex the cocklet cutoff age was 7 x 7 (Im old)

am actually only a meager 7,32 by 7,10

girl I lost my virginity with was quite disappointed, but nevertheless she had to go through with it since we signed the sexual contract kek

Have 4.7 inch cock and have no problems with girls. Why you think every girl need bbc

Western girls idolize porn

That's only cause girls in Russia have never been with a BBC before

Maybe different in Russia but here in North America

Women ONLY want 195cm+, 25cm long and wide penises belonging to fitness model Chads

Lucky...

I've still yet to have sex

>That
>Monster cock

kek

That's fucked up
I like qt asian girls here and my cock is like bbc for them lmao. Some girl once said to me it's too fat, no joke.

>12cm
>big anywhere in the globe
Not even in Korea, brah

i don't have sex because i'm to intelligent 2bh

>TFW penis too big to be in porn

>TFW too rich to have nice things

this

It's now about how big your dick is, it's about how small your brain is. Unfortunately my brain is too big, which turns girls off.

pitiful copout monkeyboy, you're scared of women and failure. admit it already

>tfw 19 kv

*tip*

t. average intellect

>be me
>32 years old
>virgin
>never had gf

I'll be having sex today on your honor, fellas.

Farewell.

Do you even try to talk to women? That's the first step

>tfw 21 kv
I'm alright now because I can legally drink :^)
I'm not empty inside

>tfw turned down every girl that has ever asked me out
:^)))
kill me

No that's for normalfag scum

>tfw lost virginity before having first kiss

not really

>talking
>TO PEOPLE

Brazil and colombia

Only normies try to improve their lives instead of complaining about them

Die normie

Are you going to tell us more about yourself, OP? I feel like you're leaving out important information.

Are you hideous? Autistic? I know that in Brazil socio-economic status is a big factor when it comes to dating. Are you successful in your trade?

If you can answer N/N/Y I'll volunteer as tribute as I will be in Brazil in December.

pls be in
R I O
I
O

...

Sorry but not even close

Want to be my 3rd gf i have kind of a polygamy thing going on

Pls be in
D O D O M A
O
D
O
M
A

p-pls... ur the first girl I've talked to besides,my mom I'm so nervous I'm shakinh

No, First World countries are. Finnish, Kiwi and other women are the most promiscuous.

>I'm a kissless virgin who has literally never had a girlfriend
>a normalfag who should gtfo
Breh...
I'm covered in acne on my back and chest and butt and everywhere, that's why I've turned down every girl who was interested in me in the slightest. It's been like this for several years now.
I'm not a Chad, Chad.
I did have a girl come up to me near the end of high school and say she thought I was retarded because I never ever said anything while out in public. What she didn't know was that she was right.

excellent rebuttal, genius. way to show your true form...not only a scared, loser virgin but also a certified evasive dipshit

Take accutane dumb fuck

it'll fix your acne

Even Chilean women are more promiscuous. Too bad they are fatties.

If you're that old and haven't gotten any in Brazil, just give up or get a prostitute

And no I'm not normie, 21 khv

You know there's medication for that shit, right?

I did, bud.
I've gone to a dermatologist, too, but nothing ever worked.
I swear I've been cursed.

How high of a dose?

If accutane can't help you're legit fucked senpai. Wtf

Id get multiple opinions, see more dermatologists.

You have a rare acne or something if accutane doesn't help you

wow how did you know? T R I P P Y

>I did have a girl come up to me near the end of high school and say she thought I was retarded because I never ever said anything while out in public.

...

Pls reply

How high of a dose accutane did you take? Pics of acne?

>I did have a girl come up to me near the end of high school and say she thought I was retarded because I never ever said anything while out in public. What she didn't know was that she was right.
fucking kek

I remember in HS asking a really ugly pimply ginger girl if she'd like to go to the cinema with me and she gave me this very insecure but willing "y-yes" and then I said "well I don't want to go with you"

not my proudest moment desu. then again, I'm now old and browsing Cred Forums at 6 in te morning, so she had the last laugh, probably

Brazil

why don't you guys understand??? you just have to TALK TO THEM, just be yourself in front of the girls and in no time you'll be having some ;))

not probably. definitely. why you no sleep netherbro?

So that's how it looks from the outside

Feels good being tall and big

worked till very late, couldn't sleep, sort of slipped into default shitposting modus

girls don't care about looks! they care about attitude! believe me, just be nice

They do care about looks, that's why I look good

what are you saying? I'm not good looking at all and even I get some girls eventually!

Yeah but you get the ugly ones

how are they gonna know the size of your dick anyways

rofl so autistic

Are you a virgin?

I'm saving myself for OP. Sorry.

FUCKING NORMIES REEEEE

I guarantee you only 1-2% of people on Cred Forums will ever even come close to fucking one of those "qt's they post in their threads.

You people are so fucking autistic about women it's pathetic. There is no reason that you should be an average looking dude and not have a girlfriend who looks somewhere around your attractiveness. If you don't you literally have absolutely no drive for something. if you want a girlfriend you're going to have to man up and fight for it. Learn from this nip here you hapless fucks.

youtu.be/gmq-20dCE1M

Psst. OP might be dead so I'm willing to reconsider. wink wink.

When I go on a date I always gently steer the conversation into the direction of penis. What you want to do is make innuendos and penis talk, so that penis becomes an ever present an ACCEPTED word in the girl's mind.

It helps tremendously to go to a restaurant that serves meat, specifially sausages. This is KEY, an din fact my method might not even work in another context (have not tested yet)

Now, I have this local German restaurant that is ideal for my method. See, by my year long experience of internet browsing skill I have found a type of sausage that is almost a one on one copy of my penile member.

When it's time to order food, I'll just say something like "I'm in the mood for something expeirmental", then """"unknowingly"""" pick said sausage off the menu.

Then once it is served I'll act all surprised, like, "Omg... Wtf, that looks exactly like my penis now! KEY is to act really surprised, and then on the same time observe her reaction (difficult but doable with practice)

If you see any approval emotion on her face musclutare, you can usually make sure that she wants a sex with that sausage, or at least would not mind it.

From there it's really easy desu.

It's really a quite simple tool actually.

>You people are so fucking autistic about women it's pathetic
ehm speak for yourself

OP here
>There's people falling in this bait

Most of it is satire

Only like 10% of the posts are from legit autists who are kissless at 18+

See lol

OP pls tell me we're still on for December.

How about coming to mexico

pls

>I'm a grill btw
You're tearing me apart Lisa

i hear ya. that's exactly what im doing now. feels meh man

I'm 19 and kv should I kill myself?

take my purity instead

I'm hideous, i'm autistic, i'm neet

i live in the mid-east btw

No you should apply yourself

shut the fuck up i claimed her first

this is the hardest country to get laid so don't botther.

take swiss-bro redpill

That's absolutely ridiculous. Just find a naive excuse to invite her back to your place at the end of the night. If she's interested in the first place, she'll say yes. Otherwise, she'll come up with something.

People form opinions about you pretty quickly, and that includes your attractiveness. Unless you completely spill your spaghetti, a girl who's already attracted to you ever so slightly doesn't need anything but slight goading (ofc this varies depending on the person and the situation) to hop into bed with you.

>If you failed just give up! There's no way to recover!

Protip you dont learn much, it's easy as fuck to get laid

...

Brazil, for sure

Oh my bad didn't catch the sarcasm

Good one brazilbro

/MG/?

nah, GO, the state brasilia is in

...

Me on the right

You taking picture

feio, autista, desempregado, e burro também? pqp... GO fica no centro-oeste, cara. em ingles seria "mid-west". mid-east seria centro leste.

They are also the most feministic, what's your point?

DELET THIS

*goes back to waiting for OP*

why don't you just go after the chinks?

Post ur pussi

>why don't you just go after the chinks?

>why don't you just go after the chinks?

only after you post yours

your shithole is the answer

jokes on you, I actually did

anywhere with legal or very lax prostitution laws my dude. which is to say basically everywhere outside the US, and Nevada in the US.

that was meant towards brazil specifically, not as a general statement. it probably applies to slootxico as well tho.

If you can't get laid at home, you won't get laid abroad.

Unless you pay

>every girl who was interested in me
Chad old go

You could go to a brothel

Or maybe just stop by the old Glory holy

I got a lot of matches when I used tinder with a fake Japanese location and in a few other places as well.
If women in other countries find me attractive then maybe I could get a gf. Too bad I'm stuck in Sweden.

You tried sex dolls?

this guy gets it

m8 why bother, I'm literally in the same boat as you, why risk making a phone call with a hooker and come off like a dumbass or roaming around at night to risk an std?

Just watch porn, only difference really is the hole, either you earn it with the lady of your life or you don't, a hooker won't do shit

Otherwise did what the 3rd guy said and go to the Philippines, that's how my parents met