Computer, create England, now fill it 1,000,000,000 muslim immigrants each wearing a sucide vest packed with enough explosive to destroy a small Tesco. In the middle of England place one naked copy of the historical figure known as Farage, provide this person with a butter knife and one packet of monster munch.
now Computer, remove safety protocols and engage on my mark
Mark/
Other urls found in this thread:
poleaboo.wordpress.com
youtube.com
youtube.com
twitter.com
edition
going to work bye
what is this gimmick? i don't watch nerd shit
geeee calm down it's just music
it just sounds good mate
have a nice day
going to do a poo but leaving my mobile on the charger so will be doing a crossword puzzle while pooing instead
Computer simulation from Star Trek with /brit/ memes plugged in
Señor Bean......
Enjoyed this post.
my gf is fit now but i can tell she's going to age terribly
should i get out now?
gtfo runt
...
Mr Bean.......
Go fuck your self no taste shill. I hope your sister is a beurette and has a bastard child with an ignorant west African
Odd thinking I've wanked atleast 200 times this year
actually i've watched all of old doctor who
could never watch star trek though because it was too boring
post una velas
The fat MexicANUS.......
I did 810 in 2013 and I kept a spreadsheet
We're not American we don't care if you burn our flag. Just more money for British flag making companies and a nice reminder we'll never be Mexican/(insert shitty third world entitled shitskin nation)
haha alri mate calm down
it's just music. stop getting so flustered over music
*does an impressive jump*
La grasa MexicANO......
insert hahahahahaha
>Computer, re-create america in the early 21st century
>location
>an area where humans used to purchase goods and food
>You're white so you don't get it. You're just an ape that listens to rap in the club to turn up. You're a white nigger relishing in the worst of black culture.
I'm angry
...
thats cause you're black
Cred Forums: the general
that's actually a pretty solid poo, good effort on the part of the yank that managed to shart that one out
can one person even make that much poop
(insert a joke against british people)
are you black? do you feel like current trap music is giving your community a bad image or something?
omg im so random l0l (LOL!) this totally me
i have a pickachu plushy that i got for christmas in 1999 in my room, probably the oldest thing i still own
(Insert a picture of an overweight 33-year-old Mexican man wearing sunglasses)
(insert memes)
Computer, create 100 self-aware Adolf Hitlers with complete knowledge of this ship & their status
strength as holograms.
Computer, disengage safety protocols.
JF out
I still have the stuffed toy given to me on the day of my birth.
Enjoy it for now m8, that shit doesn't need to last just don't get her pregnant
I'm a runt who works at walmart and someone literally shat on the floor once in the furniture department.
it was a big shit too
>Red
>Orange
>Green
fuck off billionaire
but why?
remember to brush your teeth lads
Who is this? is it the Mexican communist poster
Yeah haha
yes xD
...
Yes he is called Mr Bean
He admits it
Mr Bean
post pictures of it btw
love how the pirate takes /lat/ memes too seriously hahaha
I don't have any pictures of it
might make some peppermint tea because i've got a garden and i've got a pot with peppermint growing in it x
go for it lad
remember to insult Sheffield as you brew it
might make some nettle tea
you what?
lads its really starting make me lose my shit when people arent putting edition on the end of the op
insult Sheffield what's so bizarre about it
>"We have received many complaints about illegal immigrants working in markets including Vietnamese and even South Asians who were stealing jobs from Thais," Thai immigration police chief Nathorn Phrosunthorn said.
>"They should be doing the jobs that Thais don't want to do, like work as house cleaners," he said.
Post rare pepes
If I come to Thailand and have sex on the beach will I get my head caved in?
Sheffield, Australia is a great place you cunt
(insert rare frogs)
the illusive skinhead frog
No, you might get arrested and have to pay a 10 pound fine though.
Posting hate crimes is illegal, boyo
(insert rare beans)
saw a guy with a valknut tattoo
what are the odds he's a nazi?
what they've actually named some pisspot colony "Sheffield"
howling
(insert memes)
>people that unironically support communism
Kel, he literally looks like a bean with tiny eyes in that one ahaha
hahahahaha she's cancelled on me again on my day off ahahahahaha
mmm no, i like the idea of state capitalism and a red tsar ;)
idk I was actually going to get it but then I seen this meme and now I'm afraid it might have certain connotations
ah yes the modern """""""man"""""""" of the 21st century
if you're a billionaire could you help me cute this disease I have that nobody can figure out
>it was a big shit too
for you
the blood group tattoo on the inside of the arm looks good but scared it might also have connotations
If I were a billionaire I wouldn't be shit posting on a Vietnamese stock exchange forum.
>Work at a train station
>See those Northern Line meme trains roll by every day
>Try not to cry
activated my almonds lads
You forgot
>go on strike
Laser appointment today
Pushed my bastard paki father in the hallway as he was standing in front of the door to the stairs
Got a spine like a fucking flump lads
>Computer, Interior crocodile alligator, create a Chevrolet movie theater
>Disengage safety protocols
do NOT respond to it
good one
>COMPUTAH *hic*
>CREATE FIFTY JEWLIAN BASHEERS BUT WIT NO FECKING MOUTS SO DEY CANT YAP ON
>NOW CREATE DE OYR ARR AYE
>DISENGAGE DE SAFETIES
I have more right to post here than you do
~60% of ""people"" go through life in a cave so social norms and are a burden to the righteous 2bh
shit completed
that crossword was p hard desu
Ny times puzzle no. 0129
IGNORE IT
might become a Mormon for a laugh
Imagine Jesus would be a bit cross at me abandoning Catholicism though
Last time Jesus "got cross" it didn't go well for him
ngl my first thought when you said sheffield was mr. sheffield from the nanny
>trains being held because someone collapsed
Gonna be even later for work lads haha xo
>Mormon
please dont become a fucking degenerate
>"Oi mate mind me searching through your computer for illegal images of frogs?"
Holodeck Maintenance Technician Gowron here.
The sperm drainage tanks were clogged again so I had the computer beam Troi in there to clear it out. Crisis averted.
Need a boyfriend desu
might friend request the polish girl on facebook
...
global warming?
*takes cold side of the pillow I've been saving for 30 years*
try this son
*Chucks out a casual Dab*
*Transitions into a sonic run and flees the scene*
Big thunderstorms here lads
Flash flooding all over the place
Doggo is scared of the thunder ;-;
I kept spelling KEK
going to play fifa all day :^)
Have a more fitting Nazi frog
why do we use beta male as an insult when a beta actually replaces the alpha when he dies in a lot of animal hierarchies?
Noice
DO NOT want to go to beddy byes
Because the alpha ain't dead yet, you beta bellend
>Work Monday to Friday 8 - 12 in the afternoon
>Easy as fuck desk job
>Earn 1,000 a month
This is the bloody life lads let me tell you
they think so highly of themselves that they refer to themselves using the third person plural
The alpha/beta dichotomy doesn't exist in humans nor does it exist in wolves (it's actually a far more complex hierarchy with several at the very top)
Beta is just a term that's become synonymous with milquetoast
Any boarding school anons here?
Went to Tonbridge tbqh.
having some beans on milquetoast lads
having some milquetoast on a lad, lads
Yes
Went to Woodberry Forest
1. You're a sick cunt
2. hardest dab you've ever hit?
Getting my daily dose of Molyneux and Sargon lads
need a girl with a fat arse and perky tits
...
just watched the butterfly effect
so kutcher leaves amy smart to be diddled by her dad?
what a bastard
My name is Bill Wilson
*takes drag of cigarette*
I'm a deep undercover CIA agent
>hardest dab you've ever hit?
Almost pulled my arm dabbing yesterday haha. Almost as bad as when i did the nae nae (LOL)
He copied and pasted it from a fan on Facebook
Nice try
Call me...... Deep Throat
the lad is completely fucked in the head
his things about your birth family arent your real family makes me think he was probably molested or something
When I return from the East I will lead you all to victory
I'm actually hilarious when it comes to memes and stuff
wish that translated into real life
1. Organisms succeed by acting upon universally preferable behaviour.
2. Man is the most successful organism.
3. Therefore man must have acted most successfully on the basis of universally preferable behaviour.
4. Man’s mind is his most distinctive organ.
5. Therefore man’s mind must have acted most successfully on the basis of universally preferable behaviour.
6. Therefore universally preferable behaviour must be valid.
>tfw in the 99.99th percentile.
If you take a look at my cash reserve you will see that I have $945 left after 100 independent trials where I methodically bet $10 each round with 99.99% accuracy in basic strategy.
As you can, it is around $50-$60 less than when I started at $1000. This proves that The House has a -0.6% advantage in the game.
The only way to beat them is to come up with an ingenious betting deviation strategy.
>tfw went from broke to half million dollars in one hour.
had some chives on cream
>Organisms succeed by acting upon universally preferable behaviour.
begging the question; stating what need to be proved.
Also, computer, let him swim the Channel and beg forgiveness and shelter from the Belgians.
is this a new meme?
listened to some skinhead rock now my youtube suggestions make me look like a nazi
underrated post
1. All organisms require universally preferred behaviour to live.
2. Man is a living organism.
3. Therefore all living men are alive due to the practice of universally preferred behaviour.
4. Therefore any argument against universally preferable behaviour requires an acceptance and
practice of universally preferred behaviour.
5. Therefore no argument against the existence of universally preferable behaviour can be valid.
the fuck is this name though chives it sounds like some venereal disease
szczypiorek in polish (memorise it)
having some peppermint tea that i made
quite good
It's just green onions you spacker
This is why foreigners should get the fuck out of /brit/
It's all a game to us. We believe in nothing.
It a game and you unwitting norms are the pawns.
I spend months getting to know the innermost workings of you roaches and I play with you minds subtly. Changing you to fit my needs. After I get bored I move to the next one. Toodles.
>the new power rangers will never be as good as the old ones
come to england while you still can
FUCK OFF no it isn't
chives SPRING onions you stupid fucking YANK
>this
>onion
Anglos are dense
FUCK OFF YOU SEPPO CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
that's just really thick grass
>be Polish
>got UK citizenship in April
>mfw voted Leave
do NOT lump them in with us
Terribly patriotic of you my countryman :)
business idea: only eat off disposable paper plates with disposable plastic utensils so i never have to do dishes
bloody hell I shall glass you proper
>tfw whitey called me an impoverished card counter today
>tfw im mad because it is true
I reckon I could take on the American military
would be tough but I would prevail
stop shitting up /polska/ with your photos you crossdressing freak
switched from dermol to E45
it's very oily, not a dan
>BBC has an article on Pepe the frog
That's it lads, it's over
you're a paki for God's sake
why haven't your people stoned you yet
>you have lived to see a cartoon frog accused of racist connotations become a point of fierce debate and contention in a US election
how'd you get those?
I thought all drugs were made illegal in may
>tfw branded a racist for looking a simple frog meme
2016 is shid
im going to bed
hope you wankers dont exist when i get up
but you're going to be an ugger with a snipped cock
how's that for a solution
>it's a "the polish girl gets on Cred Forums and ridicules pakipoo" episode
belter
please stop talking to him
We call these pijpajuin, litt. "dick sucking onions"
Vehemently agree with all of these posts.
enlightening
found a pack of cigarettes in my wardrobe from when i used to smoke when i was a teenager, it doesn't have one of those gross warning labels that they have now
what should i do with them? smoke them?
*googles the image*
wild onions eh
*sips tea*
fuck I bought Assam
Give a go and post results mate
the pack will unironically be worth about $10
They're stale as fuck now that's for sure but if you like the taste of stale tobacco then go for it
hid an old pack of ciggies in some aussie's wardrobe
I can see him now on my spy camera, he looks well confused haha
m8 a pack of cigarettes from the shops costs upwards of $15-20 these days
they're sealed
>I can see him now on my spy camera
Alri Poleaboo
good one
fat fuck thinks chives, wild onion, white onion and spring onion are the same vegetable
Quite the sense of humor.
business idea: get the lads around and smash this poles skull in
I'm p sure I could take on any Australian male
Mate when was the last time you bought durries?
They're like $30 now
nice 1
of course
I've even smoked real WW II era cigarettes, we found them on the attic of my friend's house, they belonged to his grandpa.
It was a Belgian brand and the paper had turned yellow. Still was nice though.
really? can't believe people still buy them, what a bunch of cucks smokers are
Business idea: post cigarettes to Australians
Saudi Arabian billionaire Khalid Abdullah al Saud handed £400,000 by taxpayers every year
Yeah, prices are insane now m8.
I only buy them when I go out with the lads
Queen tried to use state poverty fund to heat Buckingham Palace
Aren't ciggies like £1 a pack in Thailand
Was she burning the notes?
>yfw ciggies are going to be $40 a pack by 2020
bit of a lemon if you still smoke though haha
Men are more likely to complain about ads than women, ASA finds
£1.50~
That's because all ads are these days is racemixing propaganda
Think you've been on Cred Forums too long lad, most normies don't care about race mixing
Faggot
ads never really make fun of women though
the polack is a janny
he deleted my post with wild onions and blocked me for "garbage outside of Cred Forums" despite him being the one to bring up onions in the first place
you'd be surprised the views people have on other races
you just dont proclaim it to the world
Maybe you should take the hint and leave, fucking yank
...
Cute new girl started at work today
Already looked at her Facebook and saw she has a bf
neither a janny nor a polack you tit
p good gimmick though
giz a look at her
the gf starts her new job today
hope her colleagues aren't a bunch of stalkers haha
hmm
Is the US military easy to get into?
It seems like half the yanks on Cred Forums have been in it at some point
Who /hateful white supremacist/ here?
fuck off bartek
This
Most people are secretly racist. I knew some half Irish girl who was a really nice, plain, creative person but was a literal turbo rorke in private
What's the name of that actor? I feel like I know him from somewhere
I'm more British than you'll ever be despite not having queen's mug on my currency
Polack is a racial slur for Polish people you nitwit
do gay men get turned on by their own dicks?
>Poles
>racial
ah yes
your gay if you touch your own willy
Considering I'm actually British and you're a fucking slav I doubt it
...
what if I force you to touch my willy, does that make you gay?
*Does the DJ'ing at the /brit/ crimbo do*
*Everyone is dancing, having a good time*
ARE YOU READY??!!!!
WOOOOOOO
I SAID - ARE. YOU. READYYYYY????!!!!
WOOOOOOOOOOO
*Turns up the speakers and blasts Agadoo*
*Turns on the disco lights and smoke machines*
*Everyone goes mental*
who /innocent meme frog/ here?
*goes doopin' mental*
that makes you gay
hmm no you've betrayed the white shores of Dover for Foster's and cork hats
#notallpepes
Fuck off racist, /brit/ is a multicultural general. Refugees welcome.
...
>the rise of a hero
>never actually saved any pepes because I thought it was just a stupid meme
>they now piss off lefties with their mere existence
may have to get this collection started
You can tell this was made by a non native English speaker
Getting my daily dose of the Negro News lads
youtube.com
me
how can you not have any saved
theres like a million variations
perfect for every reaction desu
the only pepe you need desu
yeah I might make an improved version
that is one smug frog
toad*
Pepe's actually a toad
t. knower
amphibian*
the missus
you sure?
gonna call "her" Ricky
Just got back from tesco
Man was their with a child. Child starts asking for him to buy some sweets, he says no and the child starts throwing a tantrum
The lad starts smacking the child, I couldn't believe it, smacking a child like that
By what right does a man think he can strike his wifes son?
back from my 3 day ban lads
did you miss me?
>made it to 5'11 and then stopped growing
NOOOOOOOOOOOO I ALMOST MADE IT TO 6 FOOT MASTER RACE
>6'1
feelsgoodman
skinny as fuck though :/
Yes
I will never give oral to a British girl and hear her say:
>"cheers luv :3"
why live guys?
A Pepe a day keeps the normies away
>tfw 5'5"
pipefitting elite lads haha end me
janny
>not just resetting your router and deleting Cred Forums cookies
m8...
>tfw virgin media
>tfw 5'11
>tfw younger brother 6'2
hahahahaHAHAHAHAHA
...
just did a good cum
I've had half of that
>5'4
if god is real, hes a cruel sadistic bastard
soon youll need a dictonary to understand nigs
good luck finding a cute cockney girl nowadays mate
>the sitting alone in Uni class
At least I have you /brit/
:)
Been fantasising about a Native American resurgence in USA and Canada desu. Really hope that they'll overcome their degenerate alcohol addictions, form a unified front, and drive the European and African invaders from their native land.
?tfw you'll never give oral to a canadian girl and have her queef in your face and say "sorry, eh"
haha yeah
*walks away*
>5'11
Here lad
*Places 'King of Manlets' crown on you*
Why are ALL redditors so tolerant?
I have a static ip address and even if i call my isp and say someone is ddosing me they tell me they cannot change it.
It was meant to be a permanent ban for "spamming" but luckily my appeal got accepted.
it might not have been good for the native americans at the time
but i'm glad the US and Canada are melting pot nations with no one dominant ethnoculture
really places we should all look up to
doing a listen
Yeah, I'm sure that will happen any day now.
rorke
didn't even realise you could get a permanent ban other than for posting cp or whatever
t. Merkel
Nah they're a very cucked people in my experience. They know it too, and can't do anything about it, hence why they drown themselves in alcohol.
alri rorke
I really like Jeremy Corbyn, I wish him a very long life and hope he remains leader of the Labour party throughout.
Same
t. Tory
Heh, yeah, the mods don't seem to be fans of that "AAAAAAAAAAJ" spam.
cheers luv the cavalry's here
this will be my second reply to this post, which i will use to point out that smokers are runts
i got broads in Atlanta
>tfw downvoting my opinion
censorship tbqh
i want a woman from essex
>t. Tory
How are your 3 kids doing?
What's the most autistic thing you've said to a girl?
>Can't get into England because he's a megarunt
>I-I don't like your accent anyway!!! I didn't want to go there in the first place!
static IP's are a thing
check your router and you can see when the IP ease expires, then unplug your router at the same time and it will allocate you a new one
the only runts are those who care what someone else puts in their body, the health effects of second hand smoke a negligible compared to all the "fresh air" the CBD is so famous for.
Sent a rope bondage hobbyist a message saying 'I wouldn't complain if you did that to me' last night
Mr Farage tell me about your sexual organs.
panda panda panda panda panda panda panda
im going to fuckin beat up this nerd Canadian if he makes another dweeby edition like this
Good post
>camping out with group of friends
>3 of my mates and one random girl laying in a tent
>randomly ask her if she spits or swallow
>everyone laughs and find it funny
>she then picks my nose
sheep sheep sheep sheep sheep sheep zzzz
Every morning I fall to my knees and thank Allah I was not born an Irishman.
exceedingly good post
it's quite comfy desu
>canada
Shadilay boyos
What's the haps?
windy out
that's more human contact then I've had in a while
grats brah
alri
imagine building your whole life around the idea of being a right wing contrarian
alri
dont have to imagine :)
>imagine
imagine building your whole life around what kind of person you prefer to put your willy in
nu thread
heteros am I right haha
>Irish
Was kind of hoping for some angry rorke replies desu. Bit awkward haha
your b8 is bad and you should feel bad
watching a documentary about city 40 lads. the utter madmen crew snuck into the city with residents ahahah absolute balls fo steel theyd be in a fucking gulag in siberia forever if they got caught
*cough*
yeah..
where?
>can't post my excellent post because there will be a new thread relatively soon and I won't get any (You)s
>can't start a new threads because the cleaning man will delete it
think this is how the catholics came up with purgatory lads
new
been on this hire bike for 9 months now
how long does a usual RTA insurance payout take?
i know exactly how you feel