Anyone got hot stories about girls farting/shitting?

Anyone got hot stories about girls farting/shitting?

>get some self respect. Or at least have some shame.

>i was fucking my ex in the ass and a turd came out and fell on the bed

Confirmed, this happens. They don't take it well if you make a joke.

for real? wtf

Like a full on turd or just a bit of shit?

Why wouldn't you take a shit before ass sex?

no they dont
because the only people that schedule anal sex are porn stars. and stopping to take a shit is kind of a turn off.

i often listen at the toilet door to hear my gf or other girls fart. I think it's hot as hell

>fuck a chick in her ass and dumped a load in her (kinda jerked off and then busted my load in her ass cause she was right)
>she goes to the bathroom in my apartment like 30 ft from me (Nyc) and sits down to piss
>farts out a huge load at the end and you could really hear it both volume and loss of control. It was quite literally her ripping a huge fart of my cum out of her ass
>"you did that to me, it's your fault and laughs"

Life has we good to me so far anons.

Are you from New Orleans? Bearded lady?

Confirmed. I do this to my wife regularly. If I hadnt just came, the cum farts would be such a turn on.

i have fucked 5 women in the ass, 2 on a regular relationshio basis, and none have shat.

>be me, maybe 12-13
>family reunion in florida
>rent cabins on beach, july so water is nice
>walk in on my 15 year old cousin pooping
>both caught off guard
>slam door, run back to water

She didn't shit, she just farted my cum out of her ass. Fairly obvious based on the sound and context, plus that was it.

Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
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Lyrics
Once there was this kid who
Got into an accident and couldn't come to school
But when he finally came back
His hair had turned from black into bright white
He said that it was from when
The cars had smashed him so hard

Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm

Once there was this girl who
Wouldn't go and change with the girls in the change room
But when they finally made her
They saw birthmarks all over her body
She couldn't quite explain it
They'd always just been there

Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm

But both the girl and boy were glad
'Cause one kid had it worse than that

'Cause then there was this boy whose
Parents made him come directly home right after school
And when they went to their church
They shook and lurched all over the church floor
He couldn't quite explain it
They'd always just gone there

Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm

Oh oh
Oh oh

When I was seven. I moved to a new neighbourhood. Unpacking and what not. My mum hears a knock on the door. It's the kids from next door. A boy who was probably in his late teens. A girl around 13. And a girl my age. They ask if I wanted to play a bit of backyard football with them. "yeah sure thing". Having a good time. Making new friends. Eventually, the eldest and middle child leave. So I start playing with the girl my age. We form a pretty good friendship. Everyday after school we would play in our backyard and first floors of our homes (first floor was a carpark/storage). One day on the first floor, we were all by ourselves. She asks if I wanted to play some grown up games. Being young and innocent, I didn't know what she meant... Continue?

Feels really good when she's all cleaned up...ask her to try to push your dick out while you're in there...bucket will cum


She squeezes a fart in-between her asshole and your dick... god tier feels.

You shy ass kids will never know

No

Yes you annoying faggot and don't keep saying "continue?" Just dump the whole story dumb nigger

Bump

Well then. So she asks if I wanted to play these games. I had no fucking clue what she was on about. She said she will show me. We are still wearing our school uniforms. She lifts up her skirt. Exposing her panties. I'm thinking holy fuck what is going on... But keep going. She turns around. Pulls her panties down. Bends over and pulls her ass apart as far as possible. I was stunned. But in awe. She tells me to come over and start licking her. I listened and did as I was told like a fucking well trained dog. But because I didn't know what I was doing, I was licking both her pussy and asshole. She let's out this big fart as I'm licking her asshole. She let's out this little giggle right after. This doesn't feel right.. But I can't stop. She tells me to get on my back. So I lay down. She walks over and sits on my face. She said she's going to keep playing with the cars that we were originally playing with. So I'm laying there. Nose pressed hard against her asshole. Mouth and cunt mashed together. While she's playing with cars. She kept letting out a little fart here and there. She eventually finishes up and goes on like nothing happened. I'm thinking what the fuck. Next day, pretty much the same thing again. She said she wants to fart in my face some more. But she couldn't fart. As much as she was pushing out. Nothing was coming out. We literally thought of ways we could get this to happen. We figured, heaps of junk food would do the trick. So we run up stairs to steal some. She eats all this junk food. Couple of hours later she started farting again. She's asking me to use my fingers this time as well. Eventually, she felt a bit sick in the stomach from all the junk. So she walks in the back yard. And takes this shit right infront of me on the lawn. All while laughing.

This weird relationship went on for about a year. I was obsessed with this girl and her fun adult games. My parents ended up splitting and I had to move away. I was devastated.