Give me you weirdest shit Cred Forums

I've fucked most of my friends mom's....even the ugly ones...I love fucking married older women especially the ones that have daughters I've dated.

Youre fucked up homie.

I fucked up my back after 3 years of sucking my own dick when i was a teenager. I used to trip on DXM every second day and the comedown always med me SUUUUUPER horny. Dont blow yourself on drugs, kids. Train yourself to be flexible first. Its gonna take me years and thousands of dollars to fix this shit.

>Fucked up
>Roaming Cred Forums
Tell me something I don't already know.

Vargas?

No

Post a pic so we know who you're talking about.

Myself and my girlfriend/baby momma both have HIV.

were now the only people we can be with for the rest of our lives

...

Looks like she loves to suck dick.

I sucked a dude's dick

would spaff on face

how romantic

Yup ... In college she got on meth ... From what I heard she did things to get that meth

No one I've found from her school can confirm though

I'm a massive fan of serial killers, and have been since I can remember. The thought of taking a life is nearly intoxicating to me, but I haven't acted on it. So instead I browse the rekt/gore threads and Bestgore.com to fill my need. I've gone to a therapist and we talked about it, I'm on seroquel and antidepressants. It hasn't helped, and I'm worried one day I'll do it and will dissapoint the people who care about me by being caught.

Ok I will. The vast majority of people who fuck off on Cred Forums are clearly fringe, emotionally fucked, anti-utility brand of person. Out of this massive group of sexually depraved individuals creating a new norm within Cred Forums, you are sexually depraved.

...

Luckily shes hot af and so is her mom so she should age pretty well so I dont mind. I love that bitch.

>I'm worried one day I'll do it and will dissapoint the people who care about me by being caught

wow dude you really are a psychopath if that's what concerns you the most about murdering people. glad you're trying to get help. i guess try and think about how you would feel if someone killed someone close to you. unless your baiting me. in which case fuck you.

same user. why are we like this?

>Implying he himself isn't a sexually depraved individual
>Roams the same website
Okay, well, unlike you, I'm not repressing my degenerate nature because I couldn't give a shit about the opinion of people whom I'll never meet.

is ageing really an issue for you both though?

I also hope to find more people that know her and might have more pics or just share nudes with them of her so they fap

I do exactly the same

I don't know I always flake. I love the idea of just dressing up, but as soon as I cum I feel remorse

Actually we are both undetectable now. The drugs they have now allow you to live a pretty long and normal life. We had a son and he wasnt born with it. So yea, we good.

nice try though fagotron

You've done it?

Because all people are freaks, but some are uninhibited.

I wouldn't target someone with a family. It'd mainly be drifters and homeless people that no one would miss. That way I'm making the least impact possible and would reduce the chances of me being caught.

I fap to dog-porn sometimes and I'm a vegan.
Seriously.

My girlfriend is a vegan too. She loves animals and she'd be devastated if she found out.

I tell blatant lies on Cred Forums... or do I?

My secret is I hate this pic

Just because animals cant talk, doesn't mean they cant consent.

There are better forms of communication than speaking, anyway. After-all, words can lie.

Why would a vegan be upset that you jerk off to dog porn? All it means is that she only eats vegetables and shit.

Unless you're trying to say your girlfriend is a cunt.

Thats how it starts numbnuts. Try killig yourself instead.

Ps, a lot of homeless people are lowkey badasses who have killed people before. Mainly other homeless people. Watch out, man.

You ever consider the fact that people have a right to their lives and existence, no matter how shitty and isolated they are?

If you're a big fan of serial killers, then you'll also know that some started out by killing vagrants and eventually it just wasn't enough; it's a slippery slope.

My family told me if I express my transgender thoughts to them they'll kick me out of the house so no shaving legs in the summer, no more buying nail polishes and cute stockings, no more posing as a girl on omegle in order to bait straight guys, my wish to become a trap is dead :(

>inb4 an hero

Move out?

how old are you? just get your own place if your family wont let you be a faggot

Yeah, I'm in the first year of psychology university and I don't think my job will be enough to pay a rent :/ plus social anxiety....
I'm 20

i have holes in near of my d.

No we don't.

3 holes actually

Fucking stupid pdocs. The "antidepressants" will make you far more likely to go it. They sensitizing and disorienting effects in just about everybody who takes them.

Good luck with the brain damage and subsequent neurological problems (sensation and movement disorders, etc) you're going to get from the seroquel, though, and all the other health problems it causes.

I hope you get NIDS / neuroleptic induced deficit syndrome.

Pics?

anyone else with Misophonia out there?

>they have desensitizing and disorienting effects
At it's worse, it's like feeling you're in a movie and life isn't really real and you're just an observer.

They also have the right to defend themselves. And id give them that opportunity, but If they couldn't, then it's too bad. Whoever would be able to kill me would have all my kills as well. There's no shame in dying, as long as you die fighting.

I guess it all sort of revolves around my interest in cannnibalism and repurposing human bodies.

I have bought a new gaming laptop and all the pictures are gone, I only take them in the winter since I can hide my shaved body and painted nails.
Sorry to disappoint you, user.

Big Pharma > Pseudoscience > Psychiatry.

Psych drugs are a scourge on humanity. And to think they have millions of kids on that shit now. It's fucking enraging.

Fuck, I was on antipsychotics/antidepressants for a couple years, and the observer thing always fucked with me. It lets your mind kind of work, but it felt like my body was just aimlessly walking around

...

How long does it take for you hair to grow back?

The leftmost pile of pills is one pill short. that's irritating.

That's not a secret. That's just a ridiculous fantasy.

She's definitely not a ranty activist cunt, she's just very empathetic. And I'd probably look like a hypocrite. For lots of vegans it's more than just not eating animal products. The root of the issue is humans exploiting animals in different ways for their own ends. So I definitely feel a bit conflicted about the fapping, but can also appreciate the slight irony. Lulz.

user, you might be right....
I was on 6 different medication, 6 fucking different medications for my bipolar 2 disorder.
They made me feel like I'm not real anymore, the side effects wouldn't go away and I actually tried killing myself because they made me feel more suicidal...I dunno, maybe for some people help but psychiatry is not mathematics so it sucks.

you fucking autistic cunt

Anyone want more ?

No shit that's how it starts. Ignorant slut.

And yes, I know homeless are dangerous, why do you think I'd target them? Itd be closer to sport hunting but with an actual threat involved.

Body hair = fast, the facial hair not so fast
Hair on my head VERY fast but they don't let me grow my hair :( I fucking hate my life....

Catfishwoman?

Alright edgelord…

Everyone in this thread has been reported to the appropriate authorities. Have fun getting raped in prison sickos.

and it's not even one short.

my first orgasm
i was 12
i was in a girls swimsuit
i sucked myself off

The tabs KEK

Whereas I don't get those feelings, and have been thinking about going off my meds anyhow.
If anything it just makes me tired, which isn't really the worst side effect, but I'll probably stop them anyhow.

I'm in a sexual relationship with my supervisor at work. 40 year old milf with a trusting husband who has no idea.

Shit's fuckin' cash yo.

Well, as long as your happy user. I don't understand the whole vegan thing, but as long as you can tolerate it, you're a step ahead of me

Not him but I've done it. The guy was older and treated me just like a girl. I got so into it that I came while he was fucking me. The idea that you are making a guy cum with your mouth and ass is a complete turn on.

how the fuck is that even weird you stupid bastard?

Cool. I'll be sure to write you every week. Will you come visit aswell?

I'm just a huge fag probably, but its a great time killer. But at the same time, its a big time waster. I'm doing it now as we speak, when I should be doing literally anything else.

Yes
Tits

once i basically raped my ex 5 times while she was passed out drunk

I was a life guard at a local pool when I was a kid. The showers in the women's locker room didn't have hot water so after morning swims the women and I (one of only 2 men that worked there out of 7 total) would wash off in the men's room. Of course they kept their suits on and so did I. On multiple occasions I got rock fucking hard and saw all of them checking out my boner. I never made a move because I was beta as fuck. On one occasion I pretended I was using the urinal and there was a half wall between the showers and the urinal and stared at and had a conversation with the one girl while I came. I'm 99.9% sure she knew what was up.

Do you have a job where you fool around with the person in charge of you?

At work? :^)

I'm not gay but I made my friend(we're both men) suck my dick when I was 11 and i like the oral sex feeling -and this continued till I was 14.

Sure you like

I fucked my 1st cousin while she was passed out on bars. I also came in her because I knew she was on birth control. She never said anything. So I don't think she knows.

Accidentally ate rabbit shit one day

Yes
More?

Right? Also I love to think what would my friends and family think. How did you meet him. I keep talking to this one guy who has a lot of clothes but I can never man up and get fucked.

Jeez, what a beautiful day.

Just don't ever act upon it. Always remind yourself how much you don't want to bring pain and sorrow to others families. Go find a purpose in life... other then killing people.

kek. this is my favourite one. you fucking faggot.

Let my male dog fuck me on a biweekly schedule from the ages of 10 to 14

You are user or Femanon?

m-my nigga

what does unrape mean?

Joseph?

Please be femanon

Thanks user!

Did you let the dog cum in you?

No. Very tempted to say yes to fuck with Joseph though…

Ama

user. :(

Didn't know shit about sex, skipped sex ed in middle school because of a move. seen dogs fuck before and thought they looked like they were having fun or some shit.

Sorry senpai.

dogs don't really definitively cum... it's just constantly shooting out super thin cum.

i'm strait, but I go to all the gay hookup spots around me and charge older guys money to fuck me. I figured i might as well make money doing something that feels good. Cause believe it or not, prostate stimulation is awesome.

I like to stick things in my butt

Whew that feels good to get that off my chest.

yep. how edgy kid. the "real ones" don't talk about it like you do. or at all. maybe they keep "journals", or "souvenirs". they have very little feeling/emotion about anything. one of the reasons that they do it. to feel something. yeah, therapist. they cannot be helped/cured. and any therapist who has any credentials would spot a threat, and would be monitored, or committed. you post reeks of attention-seeking. sad.

"I'm a straight guy who enjoys getting assfucked by dudes"
That's not what straight means.

i continuously push the boundaries with my co-worker, although she has a boyfriend and i have a girlfriend and we're all good friends. Over the last 4 years I've repeatedly stolen her panties/bras AND admitted in confidence to her that I'd done so. I also used her sweaty gym panties to sniff and jerk off with and filmed myself doing so in her bathroom. I also told her about how one day when I was house sitting for her, I jerked off in her bed and remade it so she wouldn't notice. The key to all of this is waiting about a week after I commit each act. By then, it's a "confession" and she's more interested in why I did it, than chastising me. I sent her a cock pic from that time in her bed. She stopped talking to me altogether but when I went to her house she let me in so I could apologize. It's a weird relationship. I think she wants me, but she's got strong religious morals that make her blindly loyal to her boyfriend. I can tell she's into it because of how much she wants to know about why I worship her so much. I also take pics of her all the time bending over, pics of her legs and thighs from underneath the booth at restaurants. I do it with her boyfriend there. He never notices and she never tells him shit. It's pretty fun.

I got sexy/nude pics off of my best friends facebook while I had access to it without her knowing. Tried to blackmail her unsuccessfully

I think about leaving my wife because of many reasons but most of them stem from lack of sex due to a medical issue with her vagina. she has pretty much 0 interest now, we just moved to a new country together, and I'm 25. I can't imagine living my life in this sexless way for too much longer and we seem to fight all the time anyway. too edgy with no sex which i think adds to the problem....

fuck ive never told anyone

It's 2016, grow up.

In another 30 years in the U.S, there will be no such thing as genders or sexual orientations. Everyone will be gender blind and will fuck everyone else.

Well, except the most socially isolated of the bigots and rednecks, of course. But they will push the government to far and get their shit rekt in a civil war before then.

Havin not acted on anything, there's nothing that can actually be done. Especially as I never made a threat, or said I'm going to act on these urges, just said that I have these feelings and I don't want to act on them. Big difference man.

Also just gotta say, aren't serial killers the fuckin definition of "edgy"?

It's funny. I hope you fuck humans now, not animals.

Kill drug dealers. probs make some money too.

you sound 14, man.

Fucking shit sake. We need a social cleansing to remove you disgusting fucking abominations from the face of the earth.

Try visit a psychologist, user, leaving her while she's having a problem is selfish and not nice

I killed a man

Yeah.. Right.

Do people actually keep unpublished nudes on their facebook accounts? How fucking dodgy is that?

I have a co worker who changes her shoes and I love the smell of her socks and sweaty feet. I sometimes sneek to where she keeps her shoes and took them to the nearby bath room and smelled one while I jacked off in the other, than put them back.

Story

not unpublished album, from conversations

Sorry, on mobile currently and hate the format, so I'm just trying to get the reply sent out and move on with it. I'm reading right now too, my bad user. I hate coming across as a dumbshit.

let me guess you shot a man in reno just to watch him die

Cheated on my girlfriend with four different girls. Gonna be more.

I once stook a toothbrush up my ass.
Not that weird, but oh well.

We have the power of the Jews, the banks, the economies of the world and all the politicians that serve it.

The cleansing will be to the other side, user.

Say goodbye to your "normal" bullshit that only persevered because of drunken fathers beating "the fear of God" into children for no other reason but they were stupid illiterate fucks who knew no other than what their fathers had taught them, which was that.

I had sex with my best friend's girlfriend at a party. We were both sober but he was past piss-wasted drunk. Never told him

It started like immediately after we got married three years ago. I thought i could deal with it with some non-intercourse related sexual activity but its dwindled into nothing over the years. It gets harder to find the positives in this relationship. We're both broke and fight over the smallest amounts of money, no sex or sexual activity. I just feel unhappy all the time and wonder if theres someone out there that will actually make me happy

Thanks for the advice.

I pray this is bait.
And I'm the fuckin user who wants to kill people, that's how fucked up you are.

Yes, the only reason things have been the way they have throughout human history until now is because fathers sat their sons down and said
>Listen boy, you have a penis, that means you are male, it is only O.K. to put your penis into females, if you every feel otherwise, you are evil and must pray to god for forgiveness, if you don't repent, you will be punished with eternal hellfire.

>brain too young for logic and critical thinking. Accepts lesson as absolute fact. Brain continues developing around it.

wat

>straight
>loves getting fucked by dudes
pick one

Are we related?

No, the fact that you disagree AND ARE THE GUY WHO WANTS TO KILL PEOPLE only proves to make me the better person.

Dumbass.

>people happily enjoying other peoples bodies without getting hung up on who has what body part = worse than murder

How do you cheat on your girl user ( mindsets?)

I'm a Sissy Abdl. Be mad h8ers

Straight = sexual attraction
Sex = an activity that exists independent of sexual attraction
You = fucking retarded.

Are you from Virginia or Texas?

I get it now. If pussy and tits make my dick diamonds but I like prostate stimulation but don't pop a boner to when I look at cocks, it does not make me gay to let a man fuck me.

You are a genius, user.

You're also retarded.

Would you care to explain?

With logic, of course.

I play with my poop and scoop it out of my butthole for fun!

I met the guy via adam4adam. We met at a hotel he set up after chatting for a long time (be careful about the pushy ones). I finally decided that I just had to know what it felt like, and if it was terrible I wouldn't try it again. Luckily it was amazing the first time. He fucked me three times (it was also a turn on that he wouldn't leave my ass alone and kept wanting more). Just give it a try and be safe about it user. I think you'll like it. I prefer women but sometimes I'm just in the mood to just be pounded and my ass owned by a hot daddy.

found the tumblrfag

Having sex with men, makes you a homosexual. You may not like the look of cock but you enjoy the feel of it, that's gay of you. You may feel that you're straight, but in fact, you are a rampaging homosexual who's deep in the closet.

See this can be proven with pics

...

Banged a 4yo girl. I was 5yo at the time. Pussy and ass. We moved away a few months later, Always wondered if she was as perverted as me when she grew up.

Commit suicide you fucking mentally deranged faggots

But the feel of a cock is the same as the feel of a dildo, or a doctors finger.

Does that mean that people who enjoy their prostitute examination are homosexuals? That they should divorce their wife, find a man and move on as if the last 30 years was just a big, confused mistake?

Tough to timestamp, hand is busy playing in my magic puddy

Not that user, but I just like fucking and don't limit myself to girls. If that makes me a fag to you then I'm okay with that. I'm having a great time.

When my 17 year old housemate fell asleep in my bed, I licked her feet and came on them. Good times. Good times.

i'm 17 and fucked a 13 yo girl from my brother's class

...

...

Jesus fuck

>but why

That's it. I'm out.

Goodbye thread.

I always fantasized about doing that. Was it tight

Wtf is up with you?

Kys for gods sake you are bottom of the food chain

>Edgy child detected
You have to be 18 to use this site.

When I was 16 I took the v of my sister's 11yo best friend

Every time I think I'm done, Cred Forums reals me right back in

8/10, had a pretty good chuckle

Seems pretty alpha to ne

no thanks, but nice dubs.

No, this gif was alpha as fuck
I have it on my comp but wont let it be posted twice.

This gif is pretty alpha too

yeah it was like a fucking dream
she also had a lot of pubic hair for her age

>ex gf

>NEWFAG

So is this. Would you fuck it?

By any chance did this used to be him? I don't see a chicken neck.

Yes. More?

>2016
>cant tell the difference between men and women anymore

...

I took some ecstacy around 2am and I've been masturbating nonstop to incest porn. I played video games for the majority of the peak and it kicked ass. I'm skipping work today

Different one, but this is also a man.

i'm transgender and haven't told my family

I have been on hormones for 2 years and basically look like a girl but whenever I am home or around my family I wear a beanie with all my hair hidden and thick winter clothes to hide my tits. My older sister almost saw my boobs when I got out of the shower yesterday, she asked me how long I had long hair a few hours ago and just now she dropped off a brand new girls hair brush outside my door as a gift, I think the jig might be up.

Yeah, I live with my SO now.

I have spent 10 years planning for what I will do when civil war breaks out not to mention stockpiling ammo and hideing weapons.

...

Can you give your child up for adoption, and be together at the bottom of a lake, please?

...

You think so?
Anyway, your sister seems supportive, so that's good.

has anybody got the webm of the trap in the hot tub?

I'm 19
I had never cummed
When I'm jerking off and I got to that point, I'm peeing instead of cumming
I don't know what's wrong with me

I didn't want her or anyone to know my secret. If she did find out I have no doubt she would do my nails and show me how to dress but on the other hand my dad hates faggots and probably would kick me out.

Not zombies just civil war. Cant wait to scalp a few dozen liberals. I want to make a belt.

Not a man

how the fuck did you manage to last until 19 without cumming

yep

no

....

I don't think shit is vegan

I just technically can't, I think my dick is just broken

unprotected anal with 3 dudes lined up. not even I would do this

i'm only pretending to live

me neither. would have to be at least 5

Tell her you'll stay married as long as you can get some poontang on the side

Stook? Is that like being fooked by a toothbrush?

has it always been like that? i mean, did you ever try to cum before?

Yes, I tried multiple times to cum. I don't really care about this because I'm virgin and I don't have plans to impregnate someone. But I do have wet dreams every 1-2 months so I don't know why I can't cum by myself and I pee instead.

Do you dry orgasm, or not orgasm at all?

Did you have sex more than once?

Well, I'm not sure when it's orgasm and when it's not. I can masturbate until my hand doesn't get tired.

Got my dick sucked by my ex's little sister a few years back, been screwing her for the last 5 years now. By the way she's 16.

I'm obsessed with a girl who lives 10000 miles away. This is a girl I will never meet.

>girl on right, pic related.

yeah, the next time was a few weeks later, was much better. Fucked her about 20 times in all.

Is that Masha? I haven't heard that name in years.

2 years ago, when I first turned 18, I met an older man online old enough to be my grandfather....met him and we had sex. 2 years later still haven't told anyone, and ran into him at a club when I was out with my friends at a club and almost had a heart attack.

did your sister find out?

Yep.

she knew we had sex a couple times but not that I took her v.

Wow. Are you into girls? I feel like it would be fun to try and help you out with that

What did your sister say about that?

Did you cum inside her?

I've posted this before, but I blackmailed a coworkers wife for nudes. I posted them here a while back. Now I enjoy when people see her nudes.

nothing really, she didn't really care that much. Probably helped that her friend was the one who initiated it.

yeah only like 4-5 times though

Yes, I am
>but user how?
I don't know what kind of porn could do that if nothing did to this point.

I have a gay crush on my best friend

Do you have normal hair distribution? (under arms, pubic)

I'm more hairy than average, I think
I also tried shaving my pubic

bumpp

pics?

are you openly gay?

There's got to be some sort of holy grail of kink. I'm invested now. Could be something weird and obscure - it is for me, but I happened to find it when I was much younger. Have you looked into obscure fetishes? fetishfuel.wikia.com/wiki/Examples_of_Common_Kinks,_Tropes,_Clichés,_and_Fetishes

bomps

i got a DD horse dildo lately. not the biggest one, but pretty big
when i stick it most of the way in, my own cock turns blue
i'd post pics but I have a cold ATM, coughing and snot everywhere

Not my weirdest, but I'd love to find a guy who's into the 'bored and ignored' type of thing

My first sexual experience happend when I was 14. It happened with my 8 year old cousin. Her mom and moms boyfriend were out of town and she was staying with us. My mom was a nurse and was heading out for her shift and left me in charge of her. I mostly let do what she wanted and tried to ignore her and play video games. She asked if I would play outside with her. I said no but she could play in the backyard of she wanted. Some time goes by and I hear the back door open and her come in so I go to check on her. She is completely filthy. Coverd in dirt and spiderwebs and some black crap that was grease maybe. I tell her she's dirty and has to take a bath. The smile she had instantly went away and she put her head down. She mumbled she didn't want to. I thought she was just being bratty so I told her she didn't have a choice. She mumbled ok. I run the water for her and tell her to get in, I had intended to let her get in and stop the water at her waist after she sat down. She comes into the bathroom still dressed. I repeat to her get in. She doesn't say anything she just walks in with a sad look on her face but holds her arms up. I understood and undressed her. After I got her in the tub I turned my upper body to reach for the towel to set by the tub. As I'm turned I feel my shorts pulled down and a tiny hand grab my penis. I completely froze in terror. I wanted to scream stop or don't but I didn't do anything I didn't move I stayed twisted to side even. I almost had myself together and turned back to stop her when she put my penis in her mouth. My eyes closed my head tilted up and my mind turned to ice. I couldn't do think or feel anything but pleasure. I came in her mouth and she spit it into her bath water. After I came I had a huge sense of guilt and fear I asked her why she did that. She looked down and said her moms bf taught her what she was supposed to do at bath time. I wanted to tell my mom about him but was afraid of being caught to.

You got the horse dildo used in DD? Are you sure it's authentic?

this was like last week?

Masturbate to beastiality, only husky on girl. I have a strange love for guys in girl clothes and would love a little sissy boy for my own, my boyfriend would never do any of these things for me let alone let me touch his asshole. My ex let me finger his ass and I loved it, I'm unsure as to why I love sissy boys and traps so much it's odd for a female to do so. I may have an interest in children typically 10+ I never done anything or will ever do anything. I wouldn't mind a guy peeing on me and I'd love to try an orgy, a lesbian orgy is my fantasy. I been with other girls but I never had any success in acquiring full satisfaction. I love girly feet that are small and cute, I want to dominate a man. I want whips chains etc on either me or him. I'm both a Dom and a sub depending on the mood. Id love to sit on a man's face while playing skyrim or cod. I have a daddy Dom fetish and I'd love to Have a man bathe me and dress me and put diapers on me. My dream though is to own a rather large house with my future husband and own a sex slave. She will ware only lingerie and dog ears. She will sleep on the foot of my bed, eat from a bowl on the floor and be treated like my little pet, she will be treated well but punished if wrong. Me and my future husband will pleasure ourselves with her willing body.

>butt why
>butt

tinychat
com
/blogvideo