I have a problem. My dick is too small to pee standing up but my balls are too big to pee sitting down...

Holy fucking shit op you did my day

Try pissing with a boner

Tape ballssack to taint

Wtf, Atleast you have nice balls

Heart shaped balls

youtube.com/watch?v=ycxvxR3lM5M

I can't stop laughing

Did you stop yet?

Try cutting off your balls. It works 100% trust me.

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Op here. Are my balls really that big? Is this really that unusual

Well your balls look saggy enough for you to hold them out of the way while sitting. Your fat so that might not be comfortable though

No. I think they only appear to look big

I have huge man boobs too. Is that weird too?

No, they just look huge because your dick is so tiny.

It's 4 inches hard but I generally don't pee with a boner

You need to loose weight and get some pumps. Problem solved

If dubs op sharpie in pooper

4 inches is tiny. Literally nearly the medical definition of a micropenis.

This. Mostly the weight thing

Jesus Christ, OP. How do you even have sex? Is it even possible for you to penetrate a woman?

nice one

I have massive hemorrhoids so no

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I'm a virgin

Really? I'm shocked.

google - manhood101

Kek, fucking OP. Fucking devil you.

Anyway, if you were serious, dude, just take your main hand, and take two fingers, like you'd hold a ciggarette, and with the tips of those fingers, as you place them around your penis, you need to push your balls back slightly, so it can flow straight into the toilet, let it drip. Otherwise, sit farther back, let balls hang into toilet, push cock down, almost looks like how a woman wipes her vagina after peeing. Then grab a tissue, dab the end of your dick, and pull your pants back up.

Thanks

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Get a piss tube. You can find them in camping supplies. Your only choice unless you plan to start taping your balls like drag queens

Nothing, you are lucky. You have hair there, some men with moobs only have select hair, and it looks much worse.

If you do lose weight, make sure you have enough money to pay for skin surgery, it will hang around your body like one of those dogs with that loose ass skin.

Dude, there is no need for that, unless you are really fucking facially ugly. Do you realize how many women would fuck you, based off your belly alone?

There are plenty of people who will, you just need to put yourself out there, and not expect to land a 10 (Although you could - many tiny little things love big guys, it's a daddy thing)

Op post face

show dick hard

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Holy fuck OP, you're a true atrocity of a person. Any more flaws, or did you reach the limit?