Suicide by car: how fast do you have to drive into wall/tree to gaurantee death? How big of a cliff...

That'd be the worst though, drowning sucks.

I heard there was a Darwin award given to a guy who took a bunch of pills, set himself on fire, tried to hang himself by jumping off a bridge, and attempted to shoot himself all at once. Apparently the bullet missed him and severed the rope instead, so he wound up falling into the water in such a way that the fire was put out and caused him to vomit up the pills. Then he got rushed to the emergency room where he died of hypothermia.

Don't know how true it is but it's pretty fucking hilarious for someone to fail so hard at killing themselves.

Op here don't have a shotgun and scared of height. But most importantly I want it to look like accident that way my family won't be as hurt and they'll get my insurance too

Give car to poor friend who needs one. You jump off cliff, ya selfish prick!

you again?

I owe 20 thousand on it

sounds like he won to me.
an heros 1
doctors 0

Thanks I'll aim for 100 at a tree or wall no seatbelt

if people know you're sad and the police tells them you didn't use seatbelt they will think something's up

not trying to talk you out of it, but genuinely curious why you want to end it OP.
Also, what kind of car? that's important to know

also this, insurance will find any excuse to screw your family if it's a possible suicide

i don't think OP cares about insurance

And you can think of me when you forget your seatbelt
And again when your head goes through the windshield.

Also. Don't do it bro. Talk to someone.

I mean, there are plenty of ways to make your death look like an accident for insurance.

There are also numerous ways to kill yourself in general, or kill yourself painlessly (if that's what you're going for).

There are also reasons for NOT killing yourself.

Why not make a list of all four and see where they overlap or which one takes priority over all the others?

I don't personally care if you do or not, every person has the right to decide when/where/how they want to check out. I definitely don't want some smug douchebag trying to stop me if I decide I wanna go, just a non-suicidal user here looking at the situation from an objective point of view.

What kind of car? The first question will depend on the safety features, but "as fast as the car will go" will probably still do the trick, especially if you full speed doriftu sideways and wrap around the tree.

Cliff? 50-100 feet into the ocean ought to do it.

These both seems like potentially very painful ways to go. Probably get real shitty drunk first, but then I'd worry about you taking others with you on the way out.

>shotgun in mouth
Lol'd at worst idea ever
Takes me 2 seconds to google that and find out why

I wonder how many anons who are moralfagging Cred Forums up these days have ever sucked a dick to have a place to sleep so they don't freeze to death or get rained on. Or how many have been repeatedly molested/raped by a family member on a regular basis. Hell, I'd be curious to know how many have even gone a few days without a decent meal if ever at all.

The world's just as much a dark, decaying, cruel place as it is a happy, sunshiney, hugs and kisses place. If we really go down the list, there's a lot more bad in the world than good. So how do I, or anyone really, feel we have the right to tell someone it's better to stick around if they're already set on doing the exact opposite? How do we KNOW sticking around is better than the alternative when none of us even know what's on the other side with any real certainty?

Not trying to get philosophical, just curious if it genuinely makes you feel like a better person or makes you feel like you "did your good deed for the day" by telling some rando on Cred Forums not to off themselves?

see

and thats it? just being a fag and give up?

evolution. the weak give up, the strong struggle, and sometimes win.

Drive off the grand canyon.

maybe you're the fag for sticking around and paying into a system whose main objective is to fuck you over as much as possible? who knows

point is, none of us have been dead yet could be all the an heros are sitting on top a taco pyramid with 100 hos ready to blow them at the drop of a hat are laughing at us for being the stupid ones.

of course the people who TRIED to off themselves and survived are going to say they regret it now. i'd regret it too if i tried to blow my brains out and survived only to be stuck with half a skull, looking like a mutant, and now having everyone i know watching me like a hawk to make sure i couldn't try it again and finally succeed.

...

Took you 2 seconds to figure out why you're retarded? Damn if only most retards could be this quick...

Op here. This is what I've been thinking! I'm 2000 miles away but wouldn't mind one last rode trip before I go. But still need to make it look accidental. Maybe drink a ton first at least

Dodge Dart 2015

...

Scared of heights? What? You're killing yourself...

Drinking a ton will probably have the opposite affect you're going for. You ever see those idiots who drive drunk and wipe out an entire family in a collision but just brush their pants off and walk it off themselves? Alcohol makes your body relax which is weirdly beneficial if you're being bounced around like a ragdoll across the pavement and helps you survive more times than it helps hurt you.

depends on the vehicle. if you got a shitty made vehicle that crumples up like tissue paper, then probably lower speeds. your best bet it to get t-boned on the driver's side, so your best bet will be just to pull out in front of a semi, or drive out onto the track in front of a train with your driver's side facing the said vehicles.

Yeah but most people don't kill themselves because the system itself is flawed. Most people kill themselves because they're fucking miserable by personal life events (breakups, people dying, loneliness, etc.), not because they didn't get a promotion or because their taxes are too high.

>being drunk makes my body less susceptible to physical injury
You can't actually believe this...

Fuck this shit. Don't risk the safety of anybody else just because you want to die, there are plenty of other ways to off yourself

neither one of us can say with certainty what the "majority" of people kill themselves over. we CAN try to piece together SOME reasons with notes they leave behind, things they say to people beforehand, etc. This excludes a great majority of people who never say a word and just do it.

At the end of the day, I've got no right to say that a breakup isn't "important enough" to someone else for them to kill themselves, but "high taxes" are.

Thanks for paraphrasing what I said, but it IS a very real phenomenon that does occur in many instances of drunk driving and is very applicable to OPs situation. Really, I'm kind of astounded that you don't know enough about the subject to realize it DOES happen on a fairly regular basis.

Then swerve into the tree, don't make it a straight shot. Hitting a strong tree on the driver's side of the vehicle will kill you instantly. Lean your head against the window to ensure that it does maximum damage to the brain. Worst case scenario, you won't do enough damage and your brain maintains some form of consciousness, but I highly doubt that you wouldn't die instantly on impact. The faster you go, the smaller the chance of survival. A head on collision is much easier to ensure you will die, but it may look suspicious. Take time to consider this, user. I don't care about you, and I have no reason to, but you should ask whether or not you want to end the one life you can live prematurely without seeing what the rest of life has to offer. It doesn't really matter, you'll die either way, but maybe you'll find something worth living for if you give it a chance.

Thanks user for the advice and words. Good luck to you

Mom's 1995 Ford Winstar

>DODGE YOURSELF

Sign up for the Mars Mission, nigger. It's a one way trip, and you'll make history committing suicide by being the first faggot to go to another planet.

See you starside.

Op- coincidently, I do have a tax lien against me and just lost my career. I broke up with my gf too but that doesn't really bother me. The lack of meaning and enjoyment in life is what really does it

Obviously you're all in highschool and don't know physics.

Speed should be appreciable, yes, but what kills you is the fuckton of deceleration.

/thread

why not jumping off the cliff? oh right, cus you're a coward

>implying the reason the drunk driver survives more often is because of the physiological reaction of a central nervous system depressant

It has nothing to do with the fact that they are drunk, it's because they are almost always the one that cause the collision and therefore the impact it usually through the front of the car instead of the side (and therefore safer). It has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that their muscles are more relaxed or whatever the fuck

Just dont wear seat belt going 60 mph into a wall or >50 ft cliff
You will surely be at least brain dead by the time of impact
Unless you are a lucky bastard and end up paralyzed neck down

Yeah, no shit. The faster you go, the smaller the margin of error.

>The lack of meaning and enjoyment in life is what really does it
So there you go. In the end, it's not about the situation you're in, it's about how you handle it. Obviously there are things that make it more difficult to handle, but in the end it is your own ability to stomach the negative events of life (or not) that determines your choice to suicide. Suicide is far too personally subjective to be categorical, IMO

Actually, you're both partially right.

OP how about you get a 5th of Ever Clear and shoot that up your ass. Then go driving somewhere in the mountains. Then see what happens. You should either die of alcohol poisoning or car accident or both if you are unconscious accident term the accident then the alcohol will have time to get into your blood. Does drunk driving still count as an accident for insurance purposes?

There was a whole episode of American Dad about it.
Also just ask Gary Busey.

he doesnt wanna die scared yo

>drinking
>driving
>Grand Canyon
azdailysun.com/news/grand-canyon-leads-country-s-national-parks-in-suicides/article_cc3ae92c-861e-5750-96fd-2a7d84cec546.html

Nobody will think that you 'accidentally' drove 2000 miles from home and killed yourself bud, sorry. I know its a romanticized idea, but it will look VERY intentional

that's gonna make your death possible suicide even if you're shanked on the street dude

livescience.com/24979-alcohol-injury-outcome.html

Lol my auto correct fucked up the part about after the crash happens. Anyways if you are unconcious after you crash the alcohol will kill you.

Buy a part for your car, something you might have trouble installing, like a radio
Pick a cold day of the year to do it
Park your car in the garage to keep warm
Have engine running with heater going
Sit in car, reading instructions, let your engine purr you to sleep
Goodnight sweet prince

Either way you do it you should include giving your self an alcohol enema.

Of course I'm a coward- if I can't handle depression and tax liens and unemployment and lonliness- I sure has hell can jump of a cliff! Plus the more it looks like suicide the less it'll hurt the people I do have left like my sis and mother. Otherwise I'd just do that exit bag.

I was just in a thread where Op an hero'd by car.

A good user posted the last minutes on twitter:
twitter.com/Nodescape

This guy knows how to do it peacefully. Unless you're speaking from experience but it didn't work. Lol

The newer cars are built so this can't happen. I drive 2015 dart

>Plus the more it looks like suicide the less it'll hurt the people I do have left like my sis and mother
How does that make any fucking sense?

Damn that makes me excited to do it! He died right?

Sorry I meant "less"

I was referring to a neutral, head-on collision between a completely sober person and an individual who's the exact opposite. And YES, it absolutely has everything to do with their body being more relaxed. There are tell-tale signs that sober patients present with that drunk people often do not after a car wreck. One of many being lacerations around or fractures of and around the ankles. This is because a sober person, with even a split-second of recognition they're about to wreck, naturally brace themselves against the floorboard with their feet. This causes the kinetic energy to travel up their feet through the knees and into the hips. A shitfaced-drunk person doesn't even realize they're about to wreck and oftentimes won't even see it coming so they just don't do this and thus they don't present with these injuries A LOT of times.

You're the only one trying to over-complicate this shit when it's really very simple. wtf would i know though i'm just a paramedic, i'm sure you're a surgeon or something.

How about you just leave the country for a new life. Either way it will traumatize your family. Especially your Mom and Dad. They will be devastated. Why not at least be alive and have a fresh start. Plus it sounds like you're in some shit but it's shit that can be fixed.

I guess he would have to get an old beater car then. That's a good feature though for those of us who don't want to die.

Not sure.
Link to vid of it:
periscope.tv/w/1RDGlLaNZdMGL?q=driving the impalla#

Thread about him here:

best meme of 2016

My be he will have to use a lawnmower or something else then. Hey OP you got a lawnmower?

Ah kk thanks for clearing that up bro, hey just for kicks can you drive a car off a cliff when you're a drunk so you can show me for sure? Thanks bro

When i choose to exit, i am going to drink lots of booze, take sleeping pills. and go to sleep in my car , which is parked in the garage with engine running. Goodbye to my miserable existance.

just go and jump off a cliff

another autist butthurt when they try to go Bill Nye to prove some weird point and get shot tf down from someone who doesn't hang in a la-z-boy all day. better luck next time.

OP it sounds like you have all fixable problems. Is it the problems that make you not want to live or do you just want to die?

Sorry, I actually agreed with most of what you said originally but that last
>wtf would i know though i'm just a paramedic, i'm sure you're a surgeon or something.
had just enough of a douchebag touch to it that it eliminated my desire to grant you any credit

Bro I got 99 problems

If you don't have the balls to off yourself what makes you think you'll intentionally crash into something?

Go as fast as you want you uneducated twit. If you don't stop faster you won't die.

no big deal, nothing personal was just surprised by how adamant you were that my proposal was just so unbelievable. I'll concede that there are plenty of instances where alcohol won't help you at all, like falling off a roof or down a flight of stairs or something. with that, you're just fucked either way sober or not haha

I think the problems were the symptoms of not wanting to live. I quit my job six months ago because I couldn't take it- panic attacks and depression. I then spent six month in my room unable to leave- ordering food and toiletries from Amazon and sneaking out mostly at night to walk my pup. The money ran out of course and I was evicted and I hopped in my car and drive from the west coast to the east coast to crash at my moms. They say: wherever you go there you are. And that's how I feel after being here a week. I think I'll lie and say I got the job of my dreams or something in another state and kiss my mom goodbye and the hit the road for a few more days till I find a tree or wall or cliff and speed into it.

If your car is made of diamonds, remember this:

Pocket-protected scientists built a wall of iron and crashed a diamond car into it at 400 miles per hour, and the car was unharmed.

They then built a wall out of diamond and crashed a car made of iron moving at 400 miles an out into the wall, and the wall came out fine.

They then crashed a diamond car made of 400 miles per hour into a wall, and there were no survivors.

They crashed 400 miles per hour into a diamond travelling at iron car. Western New York was powerless for hours.

They rammed a wall of metal into a 400 mile per hour made of diamond, and the resulting explosion shifted the earth's orbit 400 million miles away from the sun, saving the earth from a meteor the size of a small Washington suburb that was hurtling towards midwestern Prussia at 400 billion miles per hour.

They shot a diamond made of iron at a car moving at 400 walls per hour, and as a result caused two wayward airplanes to lose track of their bearings, and make a fatal crash with two buildings in downtown New York.

They spun 400 miles at diamond into iron per wall. The results were inconclusive.

Finally, they placed 400 diamonds per hour in front of a car made of wall travelling at miles, and the result proved without a doubt that diamonds were the hardest metal of all time, if not just the hardest metal known the man.

You could go to Panama and fuck Latin pussy, you will probably find a nice Latin girl to be your wife. They use dollars and money goes a lot further down there. You could probably have a decent life down there. You wouldn't have to devastate your family either. Just tell them you need a new start. They won't understand but they won't be traumatized by wondering where they went wrong with raising you.

^ problem with user these days, white knights and new fags act like this. The man asked how fast.

Then like I said go to another country and leave your problems behind. Everyone has problems bro. You're not that special

periscope.tv/w/1RDGlLaNZdMGL?q=driving the impalla#

learn from our an hero. he did this less than an hour ago

Sounds like you already have it all planned out pretty well. I'd say 60mph+ should be enough to get the job done.

Fucking classic kek

Well if all of you faggot kill your selves no one will be here anymore

He's dead lads

If OP's not that special, then what reason would he/she have to stick around and not off themselves?

I know a bitch in her 50s who had her son commit suicide like 4 years ago. She's still fucked up to this day. I figured she was always a crazy bitch though.

nobody an hero

godspeed OP you had the balls to do what none of us here ever could RIP 2016 you will be remembered

Sounds like someone is well versed in their TNCC!

if your killing yourself stream it on periscope

Because no one is really that special. Everyone is mediocre in their own ways. Now killing your self because you're a piece of shit who rapes kids and shit. Yeah kill your self. But usually those people don't want to die

Everyone is mediocre so why don't we all just kill ourselves? Why live another day? It won't matter anyway in the long run. These don't really seem like reasons to stick around in all honesty user. You're a real motivational speaker.

speed doesn't matter, making sure you're crushed does

Kek. This website cracks me up sometimes.

...

Why not just sit behind the wheel in a car compactor in some backwoods junk yard? Don't have to worry about speed at all, just let the machine do all the work and you can drink all you want while you wait. Problem solved.

OP, why not just try the ol'

>razor wire noose
>super glue hands to side of head
>run/jump off a building

It would look like you pulled your own head off

I like this. But I want loved ones to think it was an accident so they don't spend the rest of their miserable existences thinking they could have stopped me. I was kicked out at age 16 while living abroad and have been all by myself sense. Don't need anyone thinking they have to get involved now that I'm at my end of my story.

>

OP is already dead

I'm pretty sure your only in middle school because you have to be autistic to not know this

I'm pretty sure your only in middle school because you have to be autistic to not know this.

You wont have the guts to go through with it, just give it up.

so just go hang in a dumpster with a large bottle of liquor instead.

you'll get tanked, pass out, and likely won't wake up when the dump truck shows up. your parents will just think you were looking for a place to sleep for the night and you'll be compacted into a little cube before you even wake up with a hangover. all looks like an accident. you're welcome.

Brilliant

he could also wake up as the shredder

guess even that's preferable to whatever shitshow OP's life has become so still seems like a win-win

GOD DAMN LOCH NESS MONSTER

or roll the windows sown, pleb

dude if anyone wakes up the shredder, candide was right

>best of all possible worlds

this is a superior option OP
You can always kill yourself later, maybe even more plausibly accidental

the lack of meaning and enjoyment is not really worth it, as it will go away one day. or you can just try some good ssris and that should do the job for u

You need to be going at least 88 mph to make it Marty!

cheesespin.net/
suicide when you can