So Cred Forums, I might get laid tomorrow if I play my hand correctly. How do I not fuck this up?

So Cred Forums, I might get laid tomorrow if I play my hand correctly. How do I not fuck this up?

Ask her to watch godzilla vs Mechagodzilla

Take a bowl of eggs with you.

Kukette smiles on you
>this frog isn't associated with racism

Will do, user. Will do.

When you talk to her really listen to what she is saying, don't just wait for your turn to speak. Remember names and use them when referring to the people. Girls notice that shit. It will show her you care. When it comes time for sex make it about her and don't skip the foreplay. Start with a massage and offer her a glass of water. Even if she doesn't want it she will appreciate it. Once your sticking your dick in her then you can think about you for a bit.

don't listen to /b

In other words, be a fucking pussy.

I can see the truth in that, thanks user.

No, not a pussy. But if you want to fuck and she's on the fence about it you better pull some shit to win her over.

>play my hand

I'm glad to help. Try to make her laugh a little too. But don't get to carried away. Godspeed user.

Yeah, I gotta persuade her to go further. I think I'm at the stage where we make out and shit, but I want to go further.

>Oldfag detected

Jokes aside, thanks Cred Forumsro, means a lot.

If your afraid you won't last long during sex, (don't base on masturbation) then just don't do it.

Ha yea I'm old and married (35) but I've banged my share of pussy and I keep my wife happy. I'm feeling helpful tonight or something.

This is terrible advice, user.

I'm not kidding about the massage man. It really helps her relax (that's what you need for it to happen) and I'm not talking about a basic ass shoulder rub. Watch a YouTube video on how to give a good massage. If you spend a little time before hand and learn something it will pay off for you in the end.

Eh, it's worked for me. But perhaps you might be able to offer something different?

Put spaghetti in your pocket

Don't be a fuckboy

Don't get your hopes up. Seriously. Everytime I thought I was going to get laid it never happened and only killed my confidence. Let it just happen naturally, it'll be when you least expect it. Just try to have fun and don't focus on getting laid.

You've already fucked up

it's not a big deal if you can't get an erection at first, it's normal, but try to focus really intently on it right before it's go time so as not to insult the lady

The listening part is good. The massage part is creepy as fuck. That's something I'd expect from a man with a ponytail. If you can make a woman laugh, you're in. But don't go in expecting sex, you're setting yourself up for failure.

Massage, glass of water, and other related bullshit, are maybe good advices for your third or fourth time. But for the first, you'll want to make it happen as naturaly as possible to avoid any awkwardness

It's kind of simple: when you're just talking, try to make coments that you can blame the dirty tought on her. Stupid example because I can't think of any better ones:

"Wanna play street fighter? I can set some handicap becausa otherwise >I'll be hard for you

Good advice. I was thinking more about when it's just you and her alone, making out. I don't know a single girl who does enjoy a massage. If she's still a little nervous or whatever it will help her relax and get her use to you touching her.

Those are great. Don't be a pessimist thinking nothing will happen, but also don't create expectations that it will. As you make out, every new meeting increases the chance that it will happen eventually.

I lost my virginity to my first gf but i wasn't her first. I didn't want to screw up and advance to fast (because I was beta as fuck). After two months she was all over me and basically "raped" me one day when I was drunk.

Oh and that was after I couldn't get it up sober a few days before. So if that happens, just chill and tell her that you're nervous because you like her too much. This usually is the truth and bitches love it (not as much as dick, but w/e)

Be somebody else

I guess I didn't consider OP to be a virgin.. If that's the case just try to have fun and don't force anything. There is a good chance your dick won't work. Don't worry, just do what the other user said and tell her you are nervous or you really like her or something. Good luck. But seriously, don't force anything.

this.
when you're making out, pull her shirt up a little, but then stop and just pull her in tighter

>How do I not fuck this up?

Be sure to cram your penis in her va-jay-jay, then trash around like a hooked fish until you both cum together.

Caress her belly, go up to her ribs and as close as possible to the bras without touching it. Make her hope you do, and frustrate her.

Shortly she'll be pulling your hand to do it at once.

OP, do not tell her you're nervous

Pretty much this. user knows his shit.

If and only if he doesn't get it up. Being honest can take you great lengths with women.

if she says no DONT FUCKING DO ANYTHING that she does not consent to.

follow this advice for immediate friendzone and prepare your fedora for maximum tipping your gonna need it son

Best advice I can give you.

Yea by all means, walk in, point at her tits, grab her box and pull out your dick. It actually happens just like the porn you watch..