Hello Cred Forums, i really want do commit suicide

hello Cred Forums, i really want do commit suicide,
please dont judge me, please dont fuck with my decision, just tell me what is the fastest way to die, i wont hang myself, i have no gun, i just want to die, really quick, now, please help me.

Why not buy a ton of weed and smoke it all on a deserted island somewhere while eating coconuts from trees?

Literally anything is better than suicide and hell

I bet you're just trolling anyway, 0/10 and sage

Go find train tracks, and put your head on the rails. Don't jump, that makes a Mess. Or don't kill yourself. There's an idea

Jump off a building.

>just tell me what is the fastest way to die
Hot fudge enema overdose
Quick and tasty

well if you decide to go through with it you should just try doing something insane, like try to destroy half the world, that would surely end in your death, but if you do accomplish it, well you did something with your life at least. just don't blow up the world, or half of it, that was a joke, do something though, don't just sit down and take it without a fight.

Well I mean carbon monoxide while your sleeping is a pretty quick and painless death

Why not buy a ton of weed and smoke it all on a deserted island somewhere while eating coconuts from trees?

Literally anything is better than suicide and hell

I bet you're just trolling anyway, 0/10 and sage

no im not trolling, i want a answer. and to the train guy, i won't jump in front of a train, because i want to die for myself, not destroying everybodies future.

Helium tank and gas mask does the trick.You just fall asleep and never wake up.%100 painless.OP,if you don't care about your life
Try this first.If you don't care about your life,live it on the edge and go backpacking or some shit.You might even rediscover your passion for life

more replies please, now.

>dress in gorilla suit
>kidnap kid
>go out like Harambe

op here. isnt there any way, with usual ways, i just want to die without disturbing other people. like take a venom or cut my head of, please give me advice to kill myself without trouble for other people. its my 3rd bottle of whiskey now. and no, i won't terrorize other people you stupid son of a whore.

>I want to die
>all your suggestions suck

Just fucking do it faggot. If you're so hung up on people being affected by your death or by finding your body, you're not ready to die and you're just being a pussy

Seriously just go hop from a building or cut your throat. It's not fucking hard to find a way

What does it matter if it hurts, you will be dead

keep drinkin m8

Also, a death is never "no trouble for anyone" so if that's stopping you then you won't do it.

Said it once I'll say it again.Helium tank and gas mask man.You're bound to disturb someone if you "cut your head off".

say your name you fucking ignorant idiot. i will cut it into my arm, just for you

Maybe wait til your sober to plan this out

kill yourself

Buy a gun and shoot yourself

Okay now you're just wasting time. If you really wanted to do it you'd find a way already, you're just wasting everyone's time

Go get some help or do something, nobody is gonna sit and cry with you.

i'm more drunken than sober, i have everything to lose, but i dont like to be a human, please believe me, i hate being a human, i'm more interested in the way that comes after my life. i regret being a human being, i fucking hate it, i hate nothing more than humans, and this is why i want to die.. and this is true, so plese give me advice.

Read and reread this boring, idiotic thread till your head explodes.

Yeah, yeah, it's kinda hard though, suffocation will definitely traumatise the person finding you, as will lots of blood, so cutting/bleeding out is out of the picture, overdosing on meds is unreliable at best. Poison is the only way, there's the whole car exhaust fumes thing, it's not such a bad way to go, or just inject something into your veins, like an air bubble, does that work? I dunno.

Build a transparent box with a hole for your head that seals at the neck with a grommet, get in, get comfortable, feed garden hose into it and let it drown you, your brain will release the chemicals to ease you into death quite nicely with drowning once the worst is over, put some toy fish in there, wear a suit

Just fucking do it and quit being such a melodramatic pussy, that is the only advice you can get

There are a million ways to do it within 10 miles of you, so fucking get started

Jesus this is the most retarded OP I've seen today

Make sure you die making this world a better place for the rest of us.

if anybody thinks i'm trolling just say your name, i'll cut it into my body.

Attention seeking fag confirmed

Do it the right way,
1)sign up to be an organ donor and sign a DNR and other stuff like that.
2)Go near a hospital
3)hang yourself/break your neck/put a nail in your brainstem.
4)save a couple of lives

You can't die from weed dumb fuck

Eat 195 bananas or go on a trip somewhere and try to rekindle your love of life

Retarded post is retarded.

Agreed, if all else fails, find some money and take a greyhound somewhere you've always wanted to go. It can completely change your perspective, and you'll look back at how retarded you were.

...

my name is Jeff and i think you're trolling

If you want to commit suicide, do it the right way, go and assassinate someone who's evil, kill the president of the Democratic Republic of the Congo or seek out child rapists and teach them a lesson. Do something you'll be remembered for ya gook

Honestly not reason to kill yourself my dude if your life is really that low you need a change of scenery I thought about killing myself a couple years back I was super depressed after losing my parents and didn't know what to do with my life, I ended moving to Austin TX and I work at an auto parts store which I know sounds shitty but I have my own home and I'm engaged I've honestly never been so happy in my whole life. So stop being a big funding baby you nigger and move those feet there's a place for you in this world

Never go alone. Be sure to bring some company along your journey

You fucking idiot. Now that you've learned you got nothing to lose in your current life, it's time to take risks. Go live in another country. Message the hottest chick in your facebook and ask her for a one night stand, cause, well, you never know. Go to a club and dance and grind every girl until you get kicked out by a bouncer. If you die taking some risk you've never thought you would ever in your life do from before, then wasn't it worth it?

Don't believe him, OP; I'm Jeff.

fuck off, i'm the real Jeff

Cocksucker, don't make me go all Jeff on you.