I FUCKED UP BAD I NEED HELP Cred Forums PLEASE TELL ME WHAT TO DO

U r pathetico

Checkd.
Post her dad facebook. I'll talk with him

Nah m8 ur just some bloke from the internet avin' a laugh

this

why are you lying

You should probably kill yourself because you're a dumb ass little faggot.

i'm doing transoformation of functions.

[code]y=+/-af(+/-x=+/-c)+/-d[/code]

shit sucks,

that's what you get for making an immature, extremely unoriginal joke.

you have the sense of humor of a teenager

So you texted her sister's phone to ask her a question when she was sitting in the same room as you? Why don't you work on this story and try it in like a week when we've all forgotten this cancerous fake story?

cover story
>one of her friends said she was feeling nauseous
>"oh must be morning sickness!"
>"gotta get that abortion!"
>"FUCK YOU I'M NOT PREGNANT"
>hilarity ensues
>every time someone complains about feeling sick to their stomach gotta ask them if they got that abortion

/thread

is it an innie or outie? I have an innie and i don't have any need to wash it.

>Being 18
>Sounding like youre 16

gtfo underage nigga

Send her a pic of a cloths hangar

OP is obviously an underage faggot

I'm sorry user, but now you have to marry her.

>Mexican
>no sex until marriage
Nigger have you ever even seen a real Mexican? They're all pregnant before marriage you faggot.

i'm mexican, tell this to her dad:
"era puro pedo, señor"
that means "i was only joking, sir"

get your ass outta there OP

stop fucking calling me underage im EIGHTEEN assholes

"It was pure fart, sir"
nice try asshole

You're fucking dumb and deserve whatever is coming. If your adult ass gets some 16 y/o possibly pregnant, you should know better. Use some protection. She ain't gonna be a le to go get a fucking abortion without some parental permission anyway. What did you expect would happen. Is this fucking bait, cause it retardo enough to be

You text your gf, who has a super religious and Mexican family, did she get an abortion. Low and behold you're going to get your ass beat. So you waste our time with your fuck up and call us assholes because you don't like the answers we're giving you? No, we are not the assholes. You are OP, you're an asshole for wasting our time with your stupidity.

>im EIGHTEEN
>GF, did you get the abortion yet??
Nigga you aint 18

>im EIGHTEEN assholes
>EIGHTEEN assholes
That's a lot of assholes for a 16 year old to handle

no do you wash the insides of ur asshoole?

Ask her if she forgot the codeword.

Then say that it was code for a present for your friend (Insert bullshit name)

Make something up, be creative.

This is definitely the only way...

>after you post her nudes

in mexico "pedo" (fart) is a normal word on an average person which can ean situation, joke, etc. i was trying to be nice with you since no one here believes you

OP, fake text her fake sister a fake picture of a fake coat hanger and a fake vacuum cleaner and then say if that doesn't work you're going to fake punch her in her fake stomach or fake throw her down a fake flight of fake stairs to fake abort that fake baby.

Easy OP... Go find a new gf... This bridge has been burned.

i'm not faking you retards

he won't stop texting me he seems really mad do i call him?

tell him this:
"lo siento, señor, fue una broma muy pesada y no, no he sostenido relaciones sexuales con su novia, entiendo que ella debe hacer eso hasta el matrimonio"

I guess your gf's dad is Ricardo Diaz

gotta use a q tip for that

lol. Should ask her what to do.

i dont think i ever put a q tip in my belly button

this is why I still visit this site

can confirm

Thats quiet disgusting. You may be walking around with undiscovered batceria. Wash it out you sick faggot.

era = was pura = pure pedo = pedo sr = sr

You're telling him it was some plot to fuck your own son's dead aborted foetus's ass

Yes, it might save your ass to go over there like a man and apologize for your autism

...

lmao dude these feels so fake

Just tell them straight up.. The more you let it sit the worse it's gonna get

Nigger

Nigger

Niiggar

"Son, did you fuck my daughter?"

>incest

nigger

Nigger

Tell him this, OP.
BOTH YOUR DAUGHTERS PUSSIES BELONG TO ME. FUCK OFF BEFORE I TAKE YOUR WIFE'S TOO.
This will establish you as the alpha male.
>trust me, I married a Mexican

Nigger

>dating super religious spic
>expecting anything other than this outcome

Fuck is this from a Saw movie?

Yeah, It's either from 5, 6, or 7(3D).

tell them the truth?
the longer you wait the less your chances are.

Explain the situation to everyone, you'll still get shit, but only as much as you deserve for being this fucking stupid.

kill yourself useless coward...

...

saved. holy fuck im stupid

Call her dad and get it over with. Let him rage and apologize.

Tell the truth. Better to say something now than later; but even if you say something, you still deserve any shit they might give you.

Fuck her dad and whisper sweet nothings in his ear, like how you're sorry.

They're Mexican, so they'll either beat the shit out of you, or force you into keeping the baby and marrying the daughter. Or both.

I say own up to it and hopefully talk shit out.

This is fucking bait. If she is over there with you then why would you have to text her to ask about this supposed abortion?

LEAVE THE COUNTRY

WITHIN 24 HOURS THE CARTELS WILL COME FOR YOU

GET OUT!!

Hija, imbecil

I'm looking forward to a new gore video, like they one with no hands, no face who slowly got his throat slit with a dull knife.

OP you are going to live forever in gore threads on the internet if you don't man up and talk with the father.

The other alternative is that you are getting married and become a father. Never expect much live from her family

>I gave her my whole burrito, if you know what I mean

If you have any brains at all...ANY intelligence...

then you'd blame it on auto-correct.

See how an innocent question like "Did you get the bottle yet?" turns into "Did you get the abortion yet?".

Time to man up you beta retard!

su cajones es muy grande miho

This. OP, it's your only option.

Yeah right you underage cucker. Fuck off Cred Forums

nigger gon nig

tell him NO, I'M GAY and insist it is a misunderstanding. Act gay for the rest of your life anywhere near Mexicans just in case.

this is smart

Kek

>"Bottle? What bottle is my daughter supposed to get, son?"

YOU FUCK MY DAUGHER?

Are you simply too retarded to tell them it was a joke? I don't see what the problem is.

SON YOU FUCK MY DAUGTER?

This is the best idea today on Cred Forums.

blaming auto-correct is the solution to most of life's problems. Even pissed spics.

Tell him:

"Si senor. Le inserted mi penor in su puta hija. No tengo regreto's."

You want fuck daughter

DID YOU FUCK HER? SAY IT

shrooms

This. Did you at any time tell anyone that it was a joke, OP? Or are you going to continue to let MexiDad build up his Mexi Family Army to come by and skin your face off

Brow just say you two fuck around like that he'll think it's stupid but oh well

roll

Either this is bait or OP is the pussiest 16 yo faggot who won't man up and fix his mistakes.

They're all pregnant even before puberty.

Go and bore somebody else with your incompetence.

WHY YOU PUSSY FUCK MY DAGHTER? FUCK ASS NEXT TIME

Preach

Nice shop.

WHY YOU FUCK MY DAUGHTER, SON? FUCK ME INSTEAD.

So he just literally welcomed you in his Family be glad!

Also Fake as Fuck.

Also wy he gets Help for Free since now?

I WILL SHOW YOU HOW TO FUCK ASS SON, DEEP MEXICAN STYLE

Fukkin kek

WE WILL BOND. DO NOT WORRY. PLEASE CALL AND TELL EXACT LOCATION. TIME TO BOND

The bottle of lube, duh

Kek

>A Fernando reporting in
lol u dead gringo.
>gringo in green

Nigger

Do it and post response

Rekt

you dumb cunt, you fucked up bad

YOU USED A WHOLE BOTTLE OF LUBE ON MY DAUGHTER? DID YOU FIST MY GIRL?

You GOTTA wash that shit, Cred Forumsros. Just a little soap in there while showering. If you don't, you pretty much just have another anus on the front of your body, smell-wise.

Seriously, stick your finger in there right now and smell it.

i hope u took this nice guys advice, you would think he is trolling you in spanish but he is looking out for you... dumbass. lol.

I care so much that I hope he does it correctly with a baseball bat so he doesnt hurt his hands.

>you play stupid pranks you get fucked user. this is a learning opportunity for you

pedo means fart literaly but era puro pedo is like it was a fart/joke, this Cred Forumsro is not shitting you

you tell him" i only did anal sirm though she did clean my cock after cause atm is hawt"

con su hija pedazo de pendejo

Tell you u took a nap and that why you didnt answer the phone, and you were joking about the abortion thingy, tell them they can check if they dont belive you (to convince them)

Why didn't you automatically text "*bottle" right after you fuck.

just text him "no i diddent" you fucking retard, say sorry for the bad joke and then move on.
God damit you fucking autists dont realise that being straight forward and honest is always the best solution.
You remind me of that pasya with an autist getting arrested at a drug store for faking passing out 5 or so times just cuz he forgot his money, instead of just FUCKING SAYING SO!

>no i diddent

Tell that OP, he will realize how autistic you are

nope.
TITS or GTFO!