/MWNN/ - formerly /cric/

Would you let him fuck ya missus?

Maybe if I had a missus

William Rain is an actor m8

Anyone know where I can get one of those hats Jobe Watson was wearing today?

Just got the Swift White Hawkstrider lads

Does getting wheeled off an airplane in a wheelchair not count as an incident?

was that after he drank thirty something beers on one flight?

Just got paid to post this post lads

how do I get in on this lad

County championship starts in five lads

52 of those half size airline cans yea.

straffo.

tell me about Boland

based boon

I remember hearing the first thing they did after landing was go to a XXXX sponsorship event where he just started drinking again. Pretty sure the pilot literally diverted the plane mid flight too to give him time to drink all 52.

>teachers aides

Literally nailed it, that's exactly what he reminds me of. Generally well-meaning but has no fucking clue how to interact with people, and probably thinks all this dumb shit he does is normal. I knew a few kids with aides when I was young but never knew them through high school, always wondered how they would turn out. Might go stalk a couple now

...

Found one

Interesting

>criminal justice
what a fucking meme, fast track to unemployment
I bet he told people he studies law too

What an ugly cunt.

The guy's pretty ugly too actually.

Be educated
Don't watch anime
Don't over indulge in games
Go to gym
Eat well
Drive a Mercedes-Benz

And you should be there lad

They have a pretty crappy rugby team that features in the Currie Cup and Vodacom Cup.

Probably full of alcoholics like all the Western Cape. Can't really elaborate more, I hate the Western Cape

growing a beard to hide my weak jaw and chin lads

The other I remember from like year 3 has a Donald Trump cover photo, barely any info and publically shares "memes" like this

Also still have an ignored friend request from him from like 6+ years ago

Fascinating

really makes you think

...

where did you find this?

His old MySpace profile.

#StraffosBruceTour2017

GIVE POWER TO THE RAIN GODS, HELP /CRIC/'S COUNTY WIN THEIR FIRST EVER CHAMPIONSHIP

\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/

I am literally from somerset and I don't appreciate your appropriation of my culture

Speaking of which, where the fuck is Jynn?

>that twitter dp
christ, I can only imagine what an edgy cunt he was back then

>tfw no jynn gf

...

i was talking about the @4chancricket dp

mate you have no idea

The Boland (Afrikaans for "top country" or "land above"[1]) is a region of the Western Cape province of South Africa, situated to the northeast of Cape Town in the middle and upper courses of the Berg and Breede Rivers, around the mountains of the central Cape Fold Belt. It is sometimes also referred to as the Cape Winelands because it is the primary region for the making of Western Cape wine.

Although the Boland does not have defined boundaries, its core lies around the towns of Stellenbosch, Paarl and Worcester. It may be understood to extend as far as Malmesbury, Tulbagh, Swellendam and Somerset West. This is approximately the area included in the Cape Winelands District Municipality, which was formerly called the Boland District Municipality. To the southwest lies the Cape Town metropolitan area, to the northwest the Swartland and West Coast, to the northeast the Great Karoo, to the east the Little Karoo, and to the south the Overberg.

The "Boland" name is given to a number of sports teams from the region, including the Boland cricket team and the Boland Cavaliers rugby union team.

honestly putin would have made a great trap

Getting so many (You)s from the KP tweet lads

>this is what krazyntini has been reduced to

This has the potential to be a cracker

Both teams HAVE to win, so middlesex can just trundle along and declare with a lead of like 150, but only give Yorkshire 10 overs to get it hoping they all slog out. Sick meme time.

might have to go there for a holiday lads

I wouldn't come anywhere here right now hey lad, we've had like no rain in the whole of the country.

Maybe come next year sometime, but keep an eye on if it's had rain, you don't want to visit here when it looks like Bloemfontein in the middle of winter

>I wouldn't come anywhere here right now hey lad, we've had like no rain in the whole of the country.
any chimpouts?

seen these replays at least three times now

how do I find a gf lads? I have literally not copped feelings for a girl in the last three years

Cut out the porn lad

haven't watched any for six months, it's all a bit shit

Always chimp outs this time of the year, because students protest, and by that I mean riot like it's Apartheid still, over fee increases in tertiary institutions. And demand that it should be free. Please don't tell me how fucking retarded the above is, I already know.

But the country right now is in a but if a drought, hoping for rain next year else water restrictions are going to become aids

You know, I was like you lad, but I met an Australian girl who literally is flawless in my eyes, never cares for anyone as much as I do for her. So if you want, I can set you up here some. If you are in decent shape and a bit of a looker, can hook you up with this:

www.jennalithgow.com

I would unironically move to South Africa for that

You sound like you have no sex drive then, if you're not feeling attracted to girls or watching porn. Are you on antidepressants or something? Can't they fuck with your sex drive?

Yeah, but I'm on half the dose that I used to be on when my sex drive was alive and well

I'm still attracted to girls physically, just nothing beyond that

youtube.com/watch?v=_AzCgE43OXg
#elite

Then do it lad. She's a nice girl.
And she likes brunette dudes.

I am unironically moving to Australia next year to be with the girl I found there, so if I can do it, so can you

he also apparently came in to bat tipsy in that GOAT one dayer

I remember there was one pakistani guy who played in Imran's team that used to bat drunk all the time

And Ponting had a spring in his bat during 2003 WC final.

>subcontinental coping techniques

Lunchtime doco on Bob Willis lads

Gonna have to try and pirate all these, they're great

Sky Sports have the best stuff on during breaks, I wish someone autistic enough recorded them all. All we ever get in Australia is Taylor going fishing and Healy and Slater spouting """"""""""truthbombs""""""""""

Literally watched all of them this week. Yesterday was Derek Underwood, Day 1 and 2 were about the England in West Indies tour of 1980. Fascinating shit.

I miss the days when they'd show replays of older games when the game was rained out or something. Nowadays they just put on daytime tv programs that were too shit to make daytime fucking tv.

bloody middlesex

>middleSEX
lol xD

youtube.com/watch?v=3DZQIjp4vjo
they did this and that's all that matters to me

this

l-lewd

Just imagine how fucking terrifying that would have been. I get the whole context behind why Lee was doing it, but fuck me I'd be shitting bricks

6 an over does it lads

Inshallah the skies will open over Lords

what did he mean by this?

forecast is decent desu, its coming home lads

Will Trescothick hang himself over this?

...

already crying on sky

...

...

...

bollocks

Based fucking Lyth

Based fucking Lees

not liking this

Draw Tbh

not gonna happen

bresLAD

>

...

>somerset supporter
fug

What a crock of shit.

If you think anyone but Somerset should have won then you have no soul.

Also:
>winning a game of cricket by shady dealing and throwing away runs

Disgraceful...they are even justifying it by saying "we did what we had to do to win".

That's not why I watch cricket; it's meant to be dignified. If I wanted people fucking each over to win at all costs I would watch football.

Bullshit.

>being this fucking mad
should have beaten middlesex this season then

:^)

>missing the point this badly

It's not about winning. Its about cricket as a game.

The discussion at lunch was all about the ECB favouring flamboyant pyjama cricket over First class and the reason is because it appeals to cretins like you.

County cricket is glorious precisely because it's quiet and relaxed and a comfortable way to spend a warm summer Sunday.

If I wanted contrived declarations and cheerleaders and fireworks I'd watch the IPL...although possibly I'd hang myself first out of shame

>It's not about winning. Its about cricket as a game.
So you just wanted Middlesex and Yorkshire to bat out a draw in a must-win title match?

Get real.

I'm not saying its perfect but you can't honestly tell me you felt comfortable watching that carry on...

You may say it's OK because the ends justify the means but for me it's just a shame...

Yesterday when Yorkshire were trying to get that 350th run; it was exciting and fun and a great advert to keep the CC alive.

And then today happens and it just...cheapens the whole thing.

I mean if you're happy Middlesex won then great, but be honest...is it as fulfilling as it could have been?

no offence, but you're mad af right now. i'd you have a couple of pints and then sleep it off

That's fair...I'm pretty mad

I'd just like to hear one person admit that it wasn't exactly kosher.

maybe the third umpire was a rabbi

i don't know enough about cricket to know how common stuff like this is desu

that doesn't even make sense

Last time was in 2006 IIRC.

So I'd imagine it happens about half the time there is a compelling reason to (County titles etc.)

Maybe it's just because I hold cricket to a higher standard than other sports...I have precious little to be optimistic about these days and cricket always seemed to me to be the last bastion of civilisation.

Recent decision by the ECB have pushed cricket to move away from this and be more like other sports so I guess I just see this as yet another reason to lose hope.

for some reason i always thought the rabbis have to be present during the slaughter for it to be kosher

Serious question...is it OK to use the term kosher?

Occasionally it slips out in conversation and I'm never sure if I'm allowed to say it or not...

but there isn't really a point in sports, if you don't try to win. and if you look at this season's results it seems pretty hard to win a fc match without resulting to this

you're right, rabbis inspect companies/premises where kosher food is produced. but if the third umpire were a rabbi he wouldn't have let anything not exactly kosher happen, would he?

it's fine

why are people suggesting the match was fixed? I didn't watch it but it makes fucking sense to declare in a must win match. and it also makes sense to fucking slog to win in a must win match
retards why would they bat out a draw when that means they cant win the title
LITERALLY dont understand

It wasn't that Middlesex declared, it was that Yorkshire threw deliberately easy balls so that Middlesex could get to a declaration target sooner. The number of runs and number of overs left was agreed between the two teams behind closed doors.

This happened last year too iirc. Probably happens often desu.

Problem, Somerset?

Oh fuck off mate that was a fantastic ending

Holy shit kill yourself declaration bowling is a 10/10 meme and needs to happen more often

>Middlesex declare, target of 240
>People claim they've thrown the match away
>Yorkshire get bowled out
>People claim they've thrown the match away
Make your fucking minds up chaps.

Cricket was the winner

>to know how common stuff like this is desu
pretty rare. That was a unique situation because a draw was not an option for either team. 9/10 times in that sort of scenario one team would be playing for the draw.

This has literally been a tactic for CENTURIES you fucking freshcunt.

>muh history
>muh sanctity
>muh cricket going down the drain
>declaration bowling is literally an archaic tactic from the era where a county trophy was the pinnacle of cricket and is a complete rarity nowadays

Fucking educate yourself, then kill yourself.

Day three starts at 3:30pm today lads, not 4:30pm.

Literally just got changed to go down to the nets and it started pissing with rain while I was changing

seething

>cricket

amirite

Just woke up

Has mwngf become a parody of himself?

Anyone got a full video of the declaration bowling? Just seen Franklin's dismissal and I fear I may have missed the meme of the year

Reminder that play could have resumed yesterday but the BCCI forced the day to end because they wanted to increase the chance of breaking the partnership

Genuinely impressive batting from Poo Peeland

Latham riding his luck a bit but yeah I'm impressed. Kane, despite the fact that he was out once, didn't look troubled at all. They need to get into a lead before 3 down if >we are to have any proper chance though.

how do i have sex lads

Find a busty sri lankan girl, slip her a micky and go to town like you were playing first grade cricket again

Tbh they both did very well rotating the strike and keeping the pressure on the bowlers, which is what Australia's problem against Sri Lanka was.

>at the press conference after play India's batting coach Sanjay Bangar seemed to suggest New Zealand deliberately took breaks so as to slow the game down in the second session, which had hampered the momentum his spinners were trying to build.

Absolutely seething with fury and damage control

I can just imagine the naan dust and raita flying off his fingers as he said that.

Will Bane score 100?

That's rich coming from India

You now remember Ishant """"accidentally"""" walking out with two right hand gloves at Sydney in 2008

I'd put a few dollars on it. The lad is unironically going to be NZ's greatest ever batsman

>"There's a lot of coaching manuals and theories in cricket, but I have now worked out that you are better off not moving your feet." Somerset's James Hildreth after making a hundred on a fractured ankle

I put a bit on when he was on 0 but cashed out after the edge behind. Still made 300%

Just got objectified by a group of girls lads, absolutely livid.

Yeah and left/right helps. I feel like Latham's compulsion to sweep will get him out though, both his big chances came from him sweeping balls way outside off.

>despite the fact that he was out once
pleb falsehoodbomb

friendly reminder that this happened youtube.com/watch?v=4yelcrRg-HM

>paying $5
>cash out before he's even made 50
>make 300% profit
stop it

He literally was, he edged it and he fucking knew it.

A bird in hand's worth two in the bush lad

creaky handle m8

here it comes

TAYLOR
A
Y
L
O
R

>FAILOR

time for manawatu's brave Luke Ronchi to save us inshallah

New Zealand's two greatest ever test batsmen at the crease right now

>Luke Ronchi has a 59.50 average
how the fuck?
he's shit

What a man

Freshie

Heard Ivana can fit two in her bush mate

Time to pooicide

Cricinfo poo in loos not even trying to hide their bias. Fucing street shitters.

COLLAPSE

BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE
BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE
BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE
BANE KILL COLLAPSE BANE KILL COLLAPSE

>XD LE ALLROUNDER GOES AT 6
>XD LE KEEPER GOES AT 7

I thought we ended this meme?

trust in le glasses

Tell me about Santner why doesn't he wear the glasses

Twatling batting after Santa actually makes sense lad

le glasses

Reminder that >we could have batted for another 45 minutes yesterday but the BCCI didn't want that because they wanted kane to get out after being not out overnight breaking his concentration

It makes zero sense and if you think otherwise you are objectively a retard. Santner bats at 8 domestically, Watling bats in the top 3.

Ronchi on elite watch

The BCCI literally took a rake to the pitch overnight, can't have statpadwin not turning square

Literally time for LRPL Taylor to retire

Did Vettori teach Santa how to bowl like Warnie taught Smith

>switch on the cric
>171-4
JUST

Just remembered Mark Craig is in this XI

Thank fuck, we desperately need a cheeky 41*

thank god hes a better bat than a bowler

he's literally going to be the kiwi SPD Smith

he unironically averages 47.85

Going to regrip my bat lads

thoughts on going for the Glenn McGrath foundation pink meme?

espncricinfo.com/magazine/content/story/1058378.html

wtf how did the umpire give taylor out?

no drs is such a meme

Club colours, matching the colour of your gloves/shoes or kill yourself

Can't stand cunts who rock up in whites with all the coloured bits being a clusterfuck of no aesthetic

>if you take out all his good innings against good teams he has no good innings against good teams
bravo

I know them stats trigger your autism Danny

When has he done anything in the last few years? the 290 was on the flattest pitch in the history of the game, he's been invisible whenever we've needed him and the average is only inflated because of his unbeaten 350 v Zimbabwe

made a meme lads

santa on steady ship watch

Nice one lad you should PM it to Smart and cool cricket memes that don't toe the line and hope they give you credit

I would but then you autists would dox me

Okay just like send it and ask them to credit "Matt Poster", /cric/'s official alias

What does Santa have to do to become Vettoroldcunt 2.0?

Debut at age 18 and average 33 for two decades

Vettori would have been elite if he played in a better side Tbh

Yeah, he was an elite holding bowler who was forced to be a spearhead because there were no proper attacking quicks half of the time.

le crystal ball gazing

learn meme scoops and demand he bat at 10 or 11

other than that he just needs to keep improving his spin

Why didn't NZ attempt to rope in Jeetan Patel for this tour? I realise he's said no in the past but it would be worth a shot, all of the english pundits rate him as the best county spinner by miles and miles, and since they're playing Ronchi at age 35 bringing him in for just this series before he retires wouldn't be too bad. And it wouldn't exactly cause him to miss many domestic games (probably just one for Warwickshire)

>wrongkey
>35

Didn't know he was that fucking old

>using Ronchi as a specialist batsman

this actually might work out

Just got back from work.

Yeah it's the reason everyone gets so annoyed every time he's repeatedly picked. Shit for the last 18 months and too old. But he is a class above the other keepers in domestic, got two hundreds in shield last season from only like 5 games

execute those cunts with the horns

There's something so aesthetic about a left armer going super wide on the crease, floating the ball in, pitching on middle and straightening directly down the line of the pitch

>Tim Zoeher kept for WA and Australia
>later played for the Netherlands
>replaced with Ryan Campbell, who kept for WA and Australia
>later played for Hong Kong
>replaced with Luke Ronchi
>later played for New Zealand
>replaced with Same Whiteman
>currently holds a british passport

really makes you think

>New Zealand's brave Neil "Vaggner"

reminder that this happened youtube.com/watch?v=DWkVD3NDWg4
>punched

/afl/ is up lads

Doing some world quests right now lads, waiting for goosey to log on so we can do raid

>ywn have a qt curry cricket watching gf to go watch the cricket with and then come home to eat lamb saag that she cooked the night before

Yeah.
>forced to be our batting opener, bowling spearhead, captain, coach and selector because we're so shit
JUST

>New Zealand vs India
>Australian flags everywhere

The inferiority complex is real.

Do it.

who /comfy/ here?

>not having the better batsman play later in the innings when the pitch is worse

Fleming would be disappointed in your lack of muscular tactics, daniel

Tbh
got the next week off uni and I've got absoltely nothing to do

>not bowling right arm pure

Ronchi Ltd

Because having a cheeky pint at 2 in the morning or saying no to touring the WI deserves getting dropped far more than averaging 28 in nearly 50 tests as an opener, according to Mike Hesson.

I recommend lots of weed and KFC while watching the cric

I wish the australians would fuck off back to their nrl containment thread.

>missus dragging me to a dinner at 7
>just got /comfy/ and ready to watch GOATchi smack a cheeky 150

Relationships are overrated lads

based fucking third kiwi

I'd like to see Buttler in the XI as a specialist batsman and let Bitchstow keep for England

>LE EBERY ONE WITH A LE DECEND LIFE IS LE BAZED TURD GEEWEE XDXDXDXD

wrong way around mate

t. Trevor Bayliss

here's your (YOU), FHG

Fuck I mean have Buttler keep

Ronchi's unironically looking good

just woke up lads

>kane out
in the bad desu

>2/77

is stadpashwin over?

He unironically averages 59.50

puke ronchi

Over

reminder I had Santa=Ashlose

More blog posting from shitinfo

Tbh there might be something to the Ronchi opening meme
Can't do worse than Guptill

That's the meme you fucking freshcunt

rather have him at 11
at least guppy is prone to bouts of form every once in a while

Is moving a different country for the sole purpose of posting with a rare flag /cric/ approved?

yeah mate

I hope our spinners appeal every ball desu.

Somebody help me find a job abroad (with accommodation).

P.S. I dropped out of college.

desi here

ill sponsor you

Did you move from India or were brought up in the states?

>The lad is unironically going to be NZ's greatest ever batsman
Honestly, he already is

born and raised here, also I'm only half

>when your own family calls you gora

He wouldnt have got into Australia (pre-2007) or any South Asian side

he would have been elite as fuck for South Africa or England tho

>it's another krazykunt gets back from work and replies to every single post in the thread with pointless "truthbombs"

bit tired of this rerun

its funny because its actually true everytime you point this out

girlfriend is pissed at me for watching cricket all day, wew lads

>Rajkumar: "Reverse swing with a 5 over old ball? What are you talking about?" Ah, my bad. I forgot. It was conventional swing

jesus, I could be a better cricinfo commentator than this bloke

gf dumped me last month lad

I have literally avoided the sexual/emotional attraction meme for years

Should Australia invest some time and resources into making abos GOAT at cricket?

>New Zealand is unironically doing better in Asia than both South Africa and Australia

What a time to be alive

you alright lad?

>if it's old it must be reverse
>if it's new it must be conventional

The fucking state of this guy's understanding.

unironically yes

they'd make elite fast bowlers and they have great eyesight

tame pitch tbf

>Darwin and Perth were the only capital cities to record falling [house] prices, while all other cities rose both in the June quarter and last annual period.

Good thing GateNEET has that accounting degree so that he can calculate the depreciating returns of all his investments

Oh fuck off, this is spinning just as much as the Sri Lankan decks that Australia got manhandled on.

Bit worried about never getting another gf desu.

slightly less than Australia and much, much less than South Africa

you'll be fine, if someone as autistic as me managed to get a qt then anyone has hope

>it's an australians can't comprehend anyone doing better than them episode

>Michael Clarke’s comeback in Sydney club cricket may have stolen the headlines on Saturday, but a 16-year-old leg-spinner from Nepal gained plenty of attention as well.

>The youngster, who turned 16 last week, impressed in his Sydney Premier Cricket debut at Mosman’s Allan Border Oval on Saturday, claiming 1-17 from eight tidy overs for Western Suburbs. Lamichhane is a star for Nepal’s Under-19 side, but he’s already made it known what his No.1 priority is. "My dream is to play Big Bash," Lamichhane said.

"Test" ""cricket"" on SUICIDE watch

I've literally done nothing but praise New Zealand's batting this thread

I unironically have a small penis and suffer from PE.

it doesnt seem to be turning as much
maybe the cabbies could get more out of it

not like they're going to know that on face value m8

No one on /cric/ should be crazy surprised if NZ has a better tour in India than Australia does.
Australia got BTFO in the UAE and NZ got a draw

It's ruined my confidence, and inside I know that my ex-gf dumped me because of it.

If I was a chad with a huge cock who could fuck all day, she'd still be with me for sure.

if you're at uni go for international students, many of them are pretty curious about the white piggus

Finished with uni m8. I just turned 25.

I'm off to watch the AFL.

Feel free to watch our sport.

Australia's incompetence against spin really gets the grey matter going Tbh

The SCG generally gets a bit of turn and all >our players play on that regularly, there's all the training facilities and shit that Cricket Australia fund and a lot of the players play in India during the IPL. >Our batsmen are generally quite good by current standards too. On paper there's no reason why >we should suck so much

...

no early christmas lads
JUST

Based RC

What happened to him after his fifth death and resurrection?

INDIAN FIRST INNINGS LEAD

he's in /afl/ right now and has promised to return for the big bash

ha ha time for new zealand's 6th greatest batsman of all time

hes been in a few afl threads
said he might grace cric with his presence in summer

can't wait for BBL fantasy tttt

>Feel free to watch our sport.

Not him, but I will. Not because I actually care about your sport, but because I am ABWS. I will literally support ANYONE playing Western Shitney in anything

>ball is fielded

*rapturous applause*
*horns everywhere*
*cheers for 30 seconds*

...

FUCK

we're done

Oink oink you big fat pig

goblapsed

lmao

>SOSHIT

What would have to happen for there to be an L.A.
riot sized chimpout in Melbourne or Auckland?

Does anyone else get really fucking angry when Mark Craig shows up on the screen?

if two bowlers get a five wicket haul with a single ball who gets to keep it?

>BLOT

we dont riot unless its really important
so a war declaration or the gov revoking the treaty of waitangi or something like that

probably the one with the better economy

New Zealand's shit

same here
biggest demonstration here would have been the moratorium marches during the vietnam war

Two good New Zealanders at the crease

Watching Country Calendar lads, amazing how much a multi million dollar business can be started with a $12K loan if you're were a baby boomer, but I guess I'll just pull myself up with my bootstraps.

That was a pretty bad collapse from the kiwis, they could have had a first innings lead. Now they're fucked

Just got back from the loo, what happened?

>statpadeja

jadeja got a three wicket maiden and ashwin stadpadded

this guy fucking sucks and has terrible stats. Why does he play test cricket?

...

t. Andrew Strauss

he averages like 47 or some shit as a batsman

because of being no, he's in the squad to bowl not to add token 50s to the score

Enjoying my cricinfo ball-by-ball analysis Poo Peelanders?

>tfw handsome as fuck

seriously hope you didnt vote for anyone other than phil goff lads

is that actually him?

thats some big swing

can """"he"""" save it?

I actually fucking despise Boult more than any man in international cricket

off to bed

That's his twitter pic yep.

Say my name

anyone know if sushi shops are open on sundays
do japs even take holidays?

The only two cricketers I have ever despised are James Anderson and Ian Healy. The former because he is such a fucking little bitch and the latter because he gives me migraines.

Fales is up there as well, but I more pity him than despise him.

Heading off to the nets lads

would unironically want to watch an AUSvNZ match played in Asia

>slinky

who the FUCK came up with that nickname

my feather deed

hi daniel

unlike daniel i have only casual cricket knowledge lad

Anyone wanna meet up at Showies and watch the last session? Good tv's by the bar and can talk shit with some of the birds down there that know about sport.

genuinely interesting truthbomb about scotland and new zealand's accent

>unlike daniel

>unlike

>girls at a sports bar
>girls knowing cricket

might move to poo peeland lads

It's a strip club lad and most of the girls will negotiate to do a house call at yours if you're so inclined. Win / Win.

Who the fuck goes to showgirls?

that indian milf lads

>open /afl/
>frogposting
>wogball tripfags
>pictures of American "sports"
I dont think that semen slurping poomunity is for me lads

Obviously not insecure name faggots like yourself who would probably stammer and have shaky hands when tipping, before saying "y-you too" when the girls thank them.

You've probably never even been to Femme Fatale after cricket training on a Monday night with the lads for some banter and team bonding.

I went with the lads to hush hush once, such a fucking depressing and desperate atmosphere.

Can't really see why people bother with it.

/rug/

Wagner bowls @ 135 and pretends he is Mitchell Johnson. Surprised he has lasted this long

Get out of our thread please and we'll stay out of yours

-Your big bros from /rug/

>Mark Craig
>2 runs from 8 balls

Is he, dare I say it, finished?

>He doesn't appreciate the heart that goes into Neil Vaggner's chin music

agree with this, its quite gross. I don't really understand how some slut shaking her meat around is enjoyable for guys. Much more enjoyable to go to a bar to relax after a long day of cricket desu

can >we get a wicket

m'sportsbar

tfw banged some girl who worked at showgirls 2 weeks ago

tfw you didnt use a condom

What a rooster! What does she look like? If it's the half asian that keeps dressing like she's the bond girl from Skyfall imma be pissed.

don't know what she dresses up as, i caught her at another bar where she was just in regular clothes. pretty sure she was half brown, not sure cause i was almost blackout drunk

Oh man I've been down that road. We used to hang out with a few of them out of hours on when I was working in hospo to pay for uni. Lovely girls for the most part, but without fail, all of them have a fatal personality flaw which has gotten them to the point that they're stripping. Much easier to keep the whole thing professional and on their turf - you don't wanna get sucked into their world any more than a client - customer relationship.

I know what you mean. I met a few of them on a Sunday a couple weeks ago and I remember one of them was asian, maybe she was the one you're talking about. I can't find the one I banged on their site under performers, maybe she just worked at the bar, but my mates reckon there's no such thing as a girl who works there as a non-stripper

daniel apparently

I didn't realise it was possible to be as bad at cricket as I am lads
I was literally better in my under 10s days than I am now

Ha! Didn't even realise they put the girls on the website - just checked, my bond girlfu isn't there. But they're bringing in girls from all over the world so often, it's like a bloody conveyer belt. We were in there for the super /rug/ final and we were chatting to an aussie and irish bird who had been flown in for a couple of weeks - there was probably 35-40 girls on the floor for roughly the same number of punters, it really was a full court press.

>being pathetic enough to go to a strip club

I'd honestly neck myself

Might get a cricket coach to fix my bowling action lads. Would they take a 22 year old or would I get laughed at? Keep in mind that I literally cannot get the ball on the pitch or not bowl full tosses.

Just imagine for a second that you were Sodhi

You afraid of seeing your mum on stage lad?

Not even ams is this lame

You are literally posting in a NZ v India in the subcontinent thread m8, you wrote the book on lame.

saved to my /rug/ banter folder

When will >we declare?

250 lead

Want a gf lads

Literally just vomited everywhere lads

had my first girlfriend for the last 6 months, the vagine is certainly not underrated lads

guptill on specialist watch

where do you cop one from lad

Based kane bowling bodyline chin music

got mine from uni lad she is in some of my classes and I got talking to her at a party. Shes pretty qt lad, from Singapore but her English is perfect

Umpball

fuck the BCCI, this game has been an advertisement for DRS

What is this line Wagner is bowling?

...

Why are indians incapable of understanding how nicknames work? All the nicknames they have are shit like "very very good batsman" "man who put ball on good length at a good speed"

Ordered a pizza lads, what are you blokes having for dinner?

It's lunch time mate

nothing wrong with planning ahead of time lad

That nepalese 16 year old lad Clarke brought over apparently went 1-12 or some shit in first grade

he sounds pretty decent, an exciting prospect

bangers and mash with a side of carrots lad

>16yo
>playing first grade

He is either literally elite or not 16. Given his origins, you can put 2 and 2 together

looks it Tbh

Can you really tell the difference between 15 and 25 with south asians?

yes, ama

How old really is Misbah?

How old really is Amir?

How old really is Herath?

How old really is Afridi?

How old really is the "17yo" Afghani leggie?

first four are all around the age they claim
the afghan is 19-20

fox sports are literally showing an eroitc tradie ad right now

Who are you referring to?

VVS are Laxman's initials.

talking generally, but VVS is one example of a shit nickname

Didn't even end up going to dinner, just ended up shagging the missus in the back seat.

Waste of a fucking night if you ask me.

Showgirls is great, if you like being surrounded by silent bogans with struggling marriages and strippers with fucking SJW attitudes.

pakistan - west indies in 4 hours

sounds like the last game was a bit of a meme so I might watch this one Tbh

you realise that means that this match will probably be boring, right?

nothing is boring with the west indies in meme cricket Tbh

this is fucking ridiculous

even more undeserved than Voges' average

there is literally nothing wrong with excelling on spin friendly pitches

...

based afghans saving german cricket

>Poo Peeland
kek

KEK

K E K

guess who's back?

just woke up

I run this shithole

Arsenal LGBT community here!

>a single kiwi post in the last 14 hours

Okay, it's time for you people to take a long, hard, look at yourselves. You're literally commenting on a game between two teams you don't support, that's being played when you should be asleep in your timezone.

Not even memeing, how do you people live with yourselves? What keeps you going? What stops you from chlorinating your own gene pool with a smith and wesson?

Because you're fucking pathetic.

Feel free to save this to your /rug/ banter folder, you neet shut ins.

*dabs*

Also thanks for the bump

KAFIR

Shitfield Shield on pooicide watch

do they broadcast sheffield shield games on tv?

Will /cric/ watch this? youtube.com/watch?v=QgxvDORKzec

they stream them on the CA website

only old cunts who don't leave the house would use that, and they don't know how to use computers

Do they still broadcast on grandstand?

Not for a few years, they replaced it with wogball

Does stuff like this ever happen in cricket?
youtube.com/watch?v=QixQMUu4CKI

...

>gif.webm

I only just noticed that daylight saving happened now AMA

Is this guy, dare I say it, the worst cricinfo commentator in history?

Poodictions for today's play?

SANTA TIME!

Just went unders on kohli lads

>sip my juice box

Reminder that Kohli is guaranteed a spot in the side for the next 10 years whereas Pujara will literally get the axe with his next score under 20, despite having an objectively better record

so another 100-150 runs and declare?

Kholi is a limited overs babby. This truthbomb WILL infuriate KrazyRapist

Umpball. Good thing there's no DRS to ruin Kholi's elite 45 average

Is the pig 3 keeping cricket alive or slowly destroying it?

Pissrat Pooli Ltd

>you were born too late to explore the seas
>you were born too early to travel the stars
>you were born just in time to see Mark Craig get 50 test wickets

Pitch is genuinely fucked now

what's the Kanpur of Australia?

Alice Springs

Just got home lads

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Seriously, even though we'll lose this by some margin, I'm happy with this match. Both bowlers and batsmen have done far better than expected, and Shitrat Overratedli fails twice.

lmao even the indian fans are calling this guy out

If you bowl them out cheaply from here and Bane gets a big score you might still win

Remember when you thought England could chase 400 in the UAE and everyone laughed at you? Yeah, that's what you sound like here. Even if the next six wickets fall for zero the match is still India's.

>bet365 not offering unders on brohit

rude

You got a good memory lad. I remember also thinking NZ could chase down 350+ from in England playing away and I was wrong. What's so tough just bore blocking and surviving the day on a turning pitch? They could at least get a draw

>no fielding restrictions
>day 4 pitch that was turning on day 1

Use your brain. Draw isn't on the cards either unless rain. NZ could block out 2.5 sessions tops.

Rain is entirely possible Tbh. Pitch deterioration is the problem here. I'd give New Zealand 1.5 sessions with the way shitters like Craig are bowling on this.

>falling for the Vargnah chin music meme
>getting out to Mark Craig

imagine, just for a second, that you were Virat Kholi

>Joey: "Of the 2 I rate Steve Smith the better captain, but KW the better batter (marginally). Kohli not quite there with the bat but has a very astute captaincy mind and with Cook around, Root will only get better."

>Steve Smith the better captain
>whitewashed by fucking Sri Lanka

> I rate Steve Smith the better captain

Goosey, you here m8?

Beginning to wonder if my shitposting has gone too far lads. People are now confusing me with joshy

Yeah m8, ama

sup connie?

based fucking goosey

nytimes.com/2016/09/23/t-magazine/travel/dhaka-bangladesh-traffic.html?_r=0

...

third world cities look comfy Tbh

SA v Ireland in 45 minutes lads

>Gareth Batty

what the fuck?

When's our next cricket match lads? It's been too fucken long and I'm thirsty for some summer cricket.

Santner has an odd action, he barely uses his right arm at all

South African ODIs next week

they're going to be fucking shit though since Stac and Hazlewood aren't playing

Morning lads. Just finished nightshift and enjoying a lovely dixons breakfast.

I don't want to hear Watling say another word

AWW COME OHN SLUNKAY

For fucks sake.

BBL can't come too soon.

how is kohli so /overrated/ ??

Holy fuck these Indian fans. Why cant they procreate the library atmosphere of Lords?

Is Taylor a specialist slip these days?

How do I tell my family I'm gay?

What's the fastest way to off myself?

have loud anal sex with a large black man while your family is in the house

You can choose any bowler from any era to hit the top of off stump in one ball to save your life. Who do you choose?

Shaun Tait

"Mum, Dad, brothers and sisters, I am gay"

Ashley Giles

Working on my costume for a halloween party at uni lads
I'm going as the memory of being rejected by the only girl I've ever loved

Ireland's odds against Australia are currently at 11.00

Get on it

>poo peeland

>statpadshwin

Imagine being an irish cricket fan

NZs two greatest ever batsman will surely see them over the line for a draw

why the FUCK is the guptill meme still going

"What do you mean son?"

RRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

DIDNT GET HOME IN TIME TO BET ON GUPTILL UNDERS

(couldnt use my phone)

I really really really really really like this picture lads

someone explain why to me because I can't make sense of it

>bet365 has markets on 'Hull Tigers v Mangalore United' T20
>doesnt have markets on BANGvAFG
?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Craig NZ top scorer @ 21

cheeky 5 on it

SportsBet lad

sportsbet is lame

theyre making me call them to place a live bet. Takes forever and you lose the good lines

lol faggot

i am literally with my oneitis after a year. she wants me more than i want her now. how does it feel? kek

What a lazy fucking Samoan cunt

If I didn't ground my bat when playing U10's the coach would drop me to bat no11 next week

Cheers LRPL, nice betting with you again

who's winning?

T20

>up at 7am on a Sunday
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

why didnt the Irish traitor play for Middlesex in the final?

>>>/rug/

Literally the first thing I learnt as a six year old at Milo Have-A-Go was to ground my bat. Blind coconut shit.

Just got hired as a jackaroo lads

India Wins lol

Watching some Brett Lee compilations lads

I miss Binga

new Preoccupations album is fucking elite lads

>the fucking state of rubel the rapist

An Oceanic XI could beat India Tbh

/rug/

post your Oceanic XI lad

Latham
Warner
Williamson (c)
Smith
Ronchi, unironically
Santner
Watling (wk)
MMarsh
O'Keefe
Starc
Lyon

Australia with williamson

Afghans now strong favourites. Didn't expect them to bat so well at all.

I think the Ireland meme is over lads. Their bowling attack is decent enough to be competitive against Bangladesh and the West Indies, but they haven't unearthed any batsmen for a decade

Rubel is getting hammered

At least Afghanistan have a future in cricket

Well Ireland simply haven't produced new players. They have been relying on same group of players for 10+ years now. Decline was bound to happen.

Afghanistan and Nepal are the real futures of associate cricket.

they've got a few young bowlers, but you're right about batsmen.

I really want Nepal to succeed, but apparently their administration is corrupt at fuck and makes the PCB look clever. Afghanistan are here to stay though, I don't think I've ever seen a country embrace and excel in a new sport in such a short period of time, especially in a country as fucked as Afghanistan is

Yeah corruption is so far holding back Nepalese cricket. But the passion about cricket is so intense there, they'll eventually come through.

youtube.com/watch?v=ydvz7WR95tU
the banglel v afghanistant game is being streamed for free lads

might be an unironically better side than

I really hope so. Michael Clarke just brought a 16 year old Nepalese spinner over to Australia to play first grade cricket in New South Wales and he went 1-18 off 8 overs, which is pretty impressive when you look at the quality of competition there.

this is getting sad Tbh

RIP Jose Fernandez

>sub-continent
>"real age"

>chat is just subcontinentals insulting each other

even if he's not 16 the guy definitely is in his teens

so business as usual?

Here comes the Afghan collapse..

execute all brother-in-laws

>sakib going past razzak

JUST

Afghans need 66 off 48 with 7 wickets in hand. What a finish! Please tune in if you're not watching.

this is not the cricinfo comment section bhai

w h y would you go for the second run

GONE!!!

Getting interesting lads

Bangla got this now I reckon

we wuz pastun n shit

desher bari koi?

Terrible fielding. If we lose this, it will be due to fielding.

Munshigonj. Apnar?

fcking Rubel and his fcking full tosses :

mashrafir desher bari

he ain't happy that's for sure *wink*

FUCK YOU MUSHFIQ REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

taskin you MAGNIFICENT BASTARD!