Dear Hollywood

reddit: the post

>"there really is no need to try and do it over."
>$$$

You're looking at a business from a creative standpoint. However, that del Tor / Mountains project is something I want more than anything else in the world. Can't believe Prometheus prevented it...

if they remake blair witch project into a completely different movie id be okay with that. watched it for the first time the other day and was bored the entire time.

only redeeming feature was thinking about boning heather inside the tent before the blair witch shows up and spooks us.

id agree though that hollywood should fuck off with the remakes of good movies. if they want to remake movies there are plenty of shitty movie out there, and some of them would make good movies, they have interesting plots or characters, they just need to be made correctly. stick with stuff like that please.

What a brave and refreshing opinion. This is why I come to Cred Forums

Anybody have a pic of the witch tho?

well i have news for you. you might want to be sitting down for this.

>no fucking love story in it either.
That's why they're not making it.

OP really doesn't understand shit about the movie industry. Like "nobody's asking for remakes" then why are they selling like fucking hotcakes? If they didn't make money they wouldn't keep making them.

...

OP I am not "Holly Wood" and I doubt she posts here

Isn't that just some shit from the Conjuring or something?

>grave encounters 2

Got news, OP, and you're not going to like it. Hollywood doesn't make movies for you. They make them for normies, the ones what just want to forget their shitty lives for 2 hours. Not someone sitting there thinking about theme and elitist shit.

If that's what you want, stick to lower level production and foreign flicks.

lol, it does look like that though

>Why don't you let del Toro make his version of At The Mountains of Madness. Wow, great idea right? And no fucking love story in it either.
But that's not an adaptation, you fucking faggot.

I agree with the overall message, and think the film that kills hollywood will almost definitely be a reboot, but you gotta understand familiarity breeds both contempt and hella profit.

>the ones what just want to forget their shitty lives for 2 hours
The whole reason I want to get into filmmaking is that I want to craft my life around avoiding reality.

Don't give me some bullshit excuse about normies, you can make fun movies without being corporate-processed shitpiles.

*IS an adaptation

Dear person writing a rhetorical letter to Hollywood,

Nobody cares

Sincerely, The Internet

If they just knocked a zero off their budgets and produced more original IPs, the industry would probably be at about the same level of profit margin they are today.
I'd be a lot more happy too, and willing to spend money going to the movies.

Friday the 13th remake was better than the original tho

i just saw it and i liked it. Thought it was proper spooky. too many jump scares though, dont care for em really

The only reason to do a remake is if the first one had serious limitations that hobbled its full potential (the same kind of limitations that today are a matter of course).

So this means that even if Hollywood unfucked its shit, there'd still be another 40 years of reboots and remakes for our kids and grandkids to suffer through.

Blair Witch was good in 1999 because it was the first time anyone ever thought of making a "found footage" film, watching it nowadays after being exposed to hundreds of films who were inspired by that is a waste of your time

I personally have always wanted to see a Six String Samurai remake done by Edgar Wright even though I haven't seen the original, I think it fits his sensibilities.

Found footage was a thing before the original Blair Witch, but the second half of your statement is entirely true.

why does google say it has 100% on RT

>remakes or reboots
>posts Blair Witch
That's a sequel, isn't it?

>Carpenter's was a remake

I'm so tired of people saying this. Carpenter's was the first one to actually follow the real plot of the original sci-fi novella. The movies before that were only based off the idea, not the story.

Just got back from this. Wasn't that great, mostly a retread of the original. REC was much scarier than this

The scene where she was crawling through that small passageway was really the only good part in the movie, shit made me beyond fucking claustrophobic

I dont know whos idea it was to show what the witch look like but they're a fucking idiot, it completely ruined what made the first one good.

Fuck you, we knew this would be a bad movie no matter what, the least they could've done was showed us the witch.

>witch is now a giant creature with long arms and legs/generic dirty woman in rags/naked faggot behind a tree
really made the first film a lot less scary

...

I was annoyed by how many times they did the "person comes up behind someone and startles them by grabbing their shoulder" thing. Even one of the characters in the movie was like "would you all stop doing that!?" They obviously knew they were doing it too many times, why fucking leave those shitty parts in the movie?

cheap jump scares that's why

But I like found footage.

...

The new Blair Witch movie is actually good.

Eat a dick.

How bad was it? I heard they show the witch and its got the longface.

it's just really average and predictable. If you have seen the original and the trailer for the new one, you can probably play out the entire movie in your head without even seeing it.

You have shit taste in everything.

I'll probably pirate it, no interest in seeing shitty found footage in the theater.

This is great. You're naive for paying, though. Really, what did you expect?

What if that just makes the movie better? I mean one of the complaints I heard was that it felt too produced. Seeing a shitty cam rip might change that

You're probably right. No desire at all to see this on the big screen so that works for me.

>then why are they selling like fucking hotcakes?
They're not, at least not domestically. All the remakes are to make bank off franchises that are well known overseas so they can bleed the Chinese market dry.

You want new stories? Tough shit, since we still have 900000 more relics to drag out of obscurity to turn into film franchises and trilogies. Check back in 50 years.

not gonna lie to ya. this movie scared the shit out of me.

It really wasn't. I'm not a huge fan of the Friday the 13th series, but the first one was at least decent, the ending was kind of a twist when you watch it for the first time.

The "remake" was just them taking iconic imagery from the entire series and throwing it into a bland slasher. Even the insane sequels were better than that turd.

I've always wanted to do my own two part remake. Follow the original story with better cinematography and practical effects for the first film, hardly change anything to the story other than dialogue and pacing. And the second one would be kind of a mix of the second and third movie. We have to go from burlap sack Jason to hockey mask Jason.

But, what do I want out of Jason? Simple. I want him to run. Why run? Because that's fucking terrifying.

I'm not talking about a jauntily jog, I mean a full on linebacker "IMMA GIT YOU AND WRECK YOU" kind of run. People laugh when Jason walks through a door and it's splinters. You have him sprint through that motherfucker, fall flat on his face, but immediately get back up in a split second with the full intention of ripping you to shreds makes it more realistic, fast paced and pretty fucking scary.

I think that simple thing would make it interesting again.

>yfw she broke the stick figure

unfortunately, they spoiled that in the trailer

Did they? I never noticed it

>"would you all stop doing that!?"
that's what the audience said

If you're talking about the recent 'The Thing' that was a prequel. Not a reboot or remake. John Carpenters The Thing was a remake of an older film.

Blair Witch is a sequel, not a remake or reboot.

Learn the difference idiot.

SPOILER:

THEY ALL DIE

James Donahue thinks there's a chance his sister Heather may still be out there following her disappearance 20 years ago. He and his three friends, plus two locals, go into the woods to investigate.

Lane almost survives after following the witch's orders but Lisa kills him with her pocketknife. She and James make it to the end but are both killed when they turn around to see the witch after facing the corner.

No they don't.

Blair Witch logo looks like camel toe on a fat girl.

Seems more like an anniversary sequel, like Independence Day sequel.

>Nobody asks for remakes. We want NEW CONTENT, stuff we never seen or heard before. Not an old story wrapped up in a new CGI blanket.

Sequels and rehashes is what makes money nowadays, Hollywood offers what the audience wants like every industry

You are pretty dense

Leaked pic

Jokes aside some anons in another thread said it was tall, grey and lanky. They compared it to the thing from Have Encounters 2 I think.

>after facing the corner.
does it have something to do with the guy that killed the 7 kids in the first movie? It didnt quite seemed to connect with the rest evn though you can hear kids in the forest when they chase heather

movie was pretty good tbqh pham

Sorry man, they do.

[spoilers] I just saw it, you see her (or what you must assume is the witch) a couple of times for less than a second, she appears as a tall, lanky nude, decrepit, feral woman. Honestly, if you expected them to show the witch, and had an established idea of what she would look like in your mind, that is what she looks like. Kindof disappointed to be honest, but I don't know what they'd have done otherwise. Actually, I'd have liked to have seen glimpses of a figure but not the whole figure, like just some dangling feet or something spooky to imply there's a witch but you don't actually see her. [/spoilers]

spoopy

Sorry i fuged up the spoiler

It could have been a better movie. The sound mixing was terrible, every noise was a gigantic boom like there was some fucking mountain troll walking around, and it really got under my skin how the "shots" from their earpieces almost never lined up with where they should have been, especially in the end, though I did at first think the idea was a neat way to try and get past the question of why the fuck anyone would run through the woods at night and look through their camera.
Could have used more subtle things to instill some dread, there's a lot of shots where a carefully positioned figure off in the distance that goes unnoticed could have given the audience the impression that these characters were not safe, they were being watched, and were always very close to their ends. It also completely ignores the value of silence, except for right before cheap jumpscares. The few glimpses of the witch were actually some of my favorite parts, and I hoped that there wasn't a closeup of it because I thought it was much creepier to not see it super well, though part of my hoped not to see it because I thought it might actually be terrifying, so in some capacity it elicited the response that it set out to. Movie could have been better, should have been better, but Hollywood is some bullshit so it was mediocre.

>del taco
>>>/leddit/

>but I don't know what they'd have done otherwise

not show her at all of course. an unseen, unknowable horror is always scarier than even the best designed monster

>spooky things in the distance that the characters didn't see

I was positive they would utilize this so I was scanning every shot but I didn't see anything :( Missed opportunity. I hope after the movie's released we'll see in a few shots (like the early drone shots for example) people will find the witch staring at the camera or some shit. That'd be neat.

>it was mediocre because of hollywood

100% agree.

I mean, I would like and appreciate that, but then the entire movie would be a total repeat of the original like in every way. I almost feel they had to show something of the witch.

read the script (it's online) and you'll understand why your precious mountains of madness never got made. it's terrible even by del toro standards. and universal shitcanned the project long before prometheus because the combo of terrible script + 150 million budget + del toro insisting on an R-rating (because lovecraft needs explicit sex and violence, just like in the original stories amirite) was too much idiocy for a greenlight.

I had my fingers crossed for creepy figures, man. It's so much more effective than a tight shot of a character turning and OH NO STARTLED BY ANOTHER PERSON! Thanks for the cheap jump, but can I have a tingling dread creep down my spine or something?
Also, they missed another opportunity with that one bitch and her foot. Expected maggots or corruption, but nah.

[rec] was one of the best horror movies of the last 10 years

The original Blair Witch film works so well because it had literally no Hollywood bells and whistles. It is what found footage was always meant to be, no special effects, no budget, nobody actors, literally looks like a real home video some dumb college students shot for class and then it all goes wrong and they're genuinely lost and freaking out and not getting along. It is fully grounded even when creepy and weird shit happens. It doesn't feel manufactured or ridiculous. I haven't seen the new one, but it looks like an overproduced, high budget, generic modern horror film. The absolute opposite of the original in every way. When you miss the point so hard that the very spirit and core of the film is that compromised in your sequel/reboot, then you fucked up.

Saw it last night and was disappointed. I love the original but this was just forced jump scares and no overall creepiness. Build ups and releases all the way through. Startles over story and atmosphere.

>died alone and suffocating on her blood

rip qt hipster

I think what I disliked the most was that the video that prompted them to go into the woods in the first place was actually a piece of their own footage. Those kinds of shenanigans just don't make sense to me in the universe that is presented in the film.

Probably the most shocking and interesting part of the movie.

Agreed.

yeaahhhh, I felt they were copying that Dyalatatatatpov Incident movie in a way, but here it doesn't work because they're just in the fucking spook dimension

Like for it to make sense I guess the witch herself put the tape there because she's omnipotent as fuck?

I'd say The Descent, too. Not found footage but a brilliant horror film.

I actually liked that aspect. It gives you a sense that the witch is far more powerful than you'd initially assume. Like she's intricately manipulating these people in ways they could never imagine. Time and space are nothing in the face of pure magic (or whatever etherial force the witch utilizes)

Go to bed Professor Hawking

I'm found out. Good night you simple minded fags. Imma hit up my boys Bill Nye and NDT for some late space talk. HAWKING OUT!!

That begs the question, to what end? Why them specifically? I was fine with the Grave Encounters time fuckery while they were in the woods, but if affecting time outside of whatever spooky pocket hell the Witch resides in, then why would she even need or want to do that particular thing?

The good for me were the visuals, that scene where they get out of their tents and there's a fuck ton of figures along with some super large ones was really well shot and actually unsettling. The Witch's house of horrors was a really good segment, too.

The bad was that it suffered everything else most found footage stuff suffers from nowadays.

>forcing your jumpscares in from the characters literally saying hi to eachother all of a sudden

I'm guessing it's a "No Mouth and Must Scream" dealio where she's still mad as fuck for what people did to her and she can only reach out to a select few to torment/get revengeance on

I guess, maybe, but I still don't feel like it quite fits the rest of the movie, you know? Then again, I don't think time travel plots are anything more than cheap gimmicks, and this one doesn't really hide itself well.

Member freddy? yeeeee I member freddy!!

i haven't seen it, but i imagine she looks like the thing from mama.

the witch is a generic long skinny thing like that in rec or any other

the film has shit tier bad unknown actors. boring set up that takes too long and a really short ending with few scares or even significant moments. it's literally just like wandering empty halls in doom but encountering no one

>We want NEW CONTENT

Uh-huh. And how many of you went to see the latest entry in the Star Wars franchise?

Vote with your wallet.

Inside tied with The Descent. The first Rec was alright but like all found footage flicks it has zero rewatch value.

she didn't look like this?

LANE?