When the movie is bad

>when the movie is bad

>When you go to the theater*
Fixed for you OP

when you're an average low brow human

>when the grill is too cute that your boner pushes your popcorn box onto the ground

Based popcorn trick

>not just buying the boner box popcorn so it just nestles inside

>Paying the price of a full bone-in ham for them to cut out a hole that's much too big for your penis
Yeah sure you fuckin dork

>eating wet juicy popcorn
nahh I'll pass although it does make you feel very warm and comfy

>too embarrassed to ask for the three inch BB so you just pretend it's not worth it

Why would you want a 3 inch battleship?
That doesn't even make sense!

idktf

>when you awake from your two hour butter coma

>when the thread is bad

>when the board is bad

>when most of the people here are between 16-22 and have grown up on this site, more specifically, on Cred Forums Cred Forums and Cred Forums, have been moulded by it, and so can't make anything funny or original and can only post memes and memelets
>when this mass lack of an outside sense of humour makes the posts repetitive and bad, and thus, the site bad

I do this regardless of the movie being bad or not.

>the cinema made the movie

It honestly bothers me like hell how people disrespect the cinema.

It's that one moment where you're supposed to stop looking at your phone. No bullshit, just you watching a fucking movie. People who talk/use their phone/dirty the place needs to be hung from a fucking tree.

Lmao you get paid to clean up so there are no consequences if I kick over those buckets of popcorn people leave after the movie. Have fun buddy.

no one respects movies, and why should they, it's probably some crap like 90% is these days

>when your a shit person

seriously kill yourself if you do this

One time I left a used diabetes injector angled upward in the seat.

When I have some soda left in the bottle I pour it over the seat when the movie is over. The thought of the next guy sitting in that chair and it fucking up his clothes is so fucking funny to me

typical nigger behavior

I rub boogers and phlegm on the armrests before I leave.

ITT: people making pathetic trolling attempts by claiming they do cunt things irl


hey guys! I once skinned a cat alive

>When I have some soda left in the bottle

This has never happened to you. You push the straw into the corners to suck out every last drop of soda.

As a security guard seeing stuff like this really annoys me, get a life you god damn assholes

>be me
>go to cinema with then-gf and some friends
>gf sits left of me, buddy right
>halfway through movie gf starts massaging and rubbing my dick
>don't remember shit from the flick
>recall a break from fondling and buddy saying "as long as your dick doesn't come out I'm fine with it"

In hindsight this was a really fucking funny situation.

This

I once saw a hobo shoot up in the back row and drop his needles on the seat.

I shot up in the bathroom before I watched Dark Knight Rises. No better way to experience the plane scene for the first time.

I shot up something too before watching The Dark Knight Rises if you catch my drift

No I usually only drink the first half litre and have some left over after, I never drink too much because I don't want to have to go to the bathroom and miss out on the movie.

>drinking makes him pee in the timeframe of a movie
are you a woman

>when your legs and butt are sore but the seating place is too short
You manlets don't know how bad this feels

>tfw my cinema has reclining chairs

I bet your peasant cinemas don't have that

>suck out every last drop of soda.
I think you're the woman here

Well some movies are pretty long bro, if I have to pee after 2 hours it's not that rare. Plus drinking a lot is like pouring oil over a fire.

thats fucking gay

lol

Am I the only one that waits till most people have left, pulls down the crack of my pants then drops a dookie right on the seat? I was drunk the first time and I've been doing it for years and never been caught, literally a victimless crime

what's the best way to eat these without disturbing others around you?

>It honestly bothers me like hell how people disrespect the cinema.

Listen up knuckleheads, you have a job to do, and I'm going to make sure it gets done. No one is getting paid for nothing on my watch. If my taxes go to your wages and you don't have to do a damn thing, then I'm gonna make you do something. That's why I always buy two boxes, just in case I finish the first one and have nothing left to throw. Those 2 minutes you spend bending over to pick up my shit make up for the 50 cents to your 10 dollar hourly wage. My messes give you a reason to work. My messes are the reason you can put food on the table. If I don't make a mess, then your kid isn't going to college. Tough luck.

>I always buy two boxes, just in case I finish the first one and have nothing left to throw.
KEK

Love these threads

>when you buy the Boner Box intending on getting a hand job from your date
>but once you slip your dick inside, the warm moist popcorn feels so good that you just start angrily fucking the popcorn box