Critic kino edition

Isn't that Ebert's life story?

mayo > kermet

when has he ever done this? he frequently bashes a lot of his favourite actors

Warcraft

His Sex And The City reviews are comedy gold.

>it's a Mayo talks about how much he laughed at some shitty comedy episode
every episode he reviews a comedy, the greatest part is when he describes the different kinds of grins and laughs he did

"lots of laughs all the way through"

Mayo is a massive fucking pleb to be honest.

Here's the thing:

>dear (x) and (y)
>good doctor(s)
>listener undergoing surgery/running a marathon
>Wittertainment Related Injury
>clergy corner/cartoonists corner/etc
>hello to Jason Isaacs
>how do you follow us on snapchat?
>flappy hands/banging the table
>Mary Poppins/The Exorcist/Silent Running
>tv movie of the week is 2am on Film4
>the BBFC
>ask me the secret of comedy
>showbiz anecdote
>colonial commoners
>DANNY DYAWWWW
>ZZZACK SNYDER
>SHUTUP BUTTWAD!
>Huge Action
>the Wittertainment Cruise
>not without flaws
>the Code of Conduct
>other (x) are available
>the good lady professor (her indoors)
>Dougal and the Blue cat
>Well done U
>Contributor cites their swimming certificate as qualification
>all requests Friday
>Outer Hebrides Film Festival
>skiffle
>The Flibbity Flongs of the Blippity Bongs
>he was lovely, he can come back any time

What's your favourite meme? And which ones am I missing?

Love to hear about how problematic movies are because they don't have a black transgender lesbian as the lead character!

He never does this.

lots of laughs all the way through and if you ask me anything the answer is no

>Simon, do you know-
>No.
>Simon, have you seen-
>No.
>You know that film where-
>No.

your list is not without its flaws

Wow ... this was written by a 12 year old? Wow.

please provide an example of this

And annoying to boot. No, you interrupting the guy isn't funny.

Forgetting
>McGeee, McGeeeee, McGeeeeeeeeeee yeah!

retard

Sorry, I was trying to do the wittertainment meme where Simon reads out a letter and Mark is amazed by a child's verbal dexterity

It's quickly becoming my least favourite meme

Personally I suspect that Kermode's kid is a bit slow

Ha

he never directed a movie?

what fucking film did he direct? I must see it

as a rule of thumb, I respect his opinion if it doesn't involve gender politics.

this. he was so close to be honest with his assesment of the new ghostbusters but his cuckself got the better of him

GOAT interview:
youtube.com/watch?v=zfuaWPicXfY

Commode is barely above RLM
The critics I enjoy reading are Nick Pinkerton, Jonathan Rosenbaum, David Bordwell, Richard Brody and a small amount of Armond White

Every Ben Wheatley film

its true he does this alot, but i dont mind it.

>a small amount of Armond White

OPinion discarded

True but Mayo is just a dj and doesn't review anything.

>It's a William Peter Blatty anecdote
>It's a meeting my wife anecdote
>The Ninth Configuration
>Hackers
>SIR ANT-THONY HOPKINS
>Toes curled so much they were in his ears
>Bathe in CHLOROX
>Laughed like a drain
>Really?!

He enjoyed the Twilight films.....like all of them. He recently said he marathon-ed them during his break.

Male Nudity:

>Oh I love Richard Gere. I wouldn't mind seeing him naked. Even my wife knows how I feel about Richard Gere
>Could have done with more male nudity
>Funny that the Hemsworth guy plays a dumb beefcake
>Let's read out this letter from a woman saying how hot male actor is
>Let's read out letter from gay man saying how hot male actor is

Female Nudity
>Problematic
>Leering
>Grubby
>Bathe in Chlorox
>Don't trust the director
>Gender politics are 'all over the place'
>No letter ever mentioning appearance or desirability of female actor ever even makes it to be read out.
>Simon Mayon says something along the lines of Cate Blanchett is attractive: Mark groans and tells him to stop and that it's creepy

I bet he has to behave for his wife by treating male desirability as a good thing and just ignoring or condemning any form of acknowledgement of female desirability. Reminds me of an ex-girlfriend who was able to comment on how good looking men were but if I ever did the same she would get angry and ignore me for the rest of the day

youtube.com/watch?v=r__j6Znnghw

watch how much mark falls over himself to praise this brave woman of colour

I wouldn't say that he is the greatest but he is one of the few popular real professional critics. All of the other mainstream 'critics' are just YouTube personalities. All they can do is just talk about the plot. Like that's it. The plot is the only thing they can talk about and they don't even offer criticism just name the things that happened in the movie and how they were stupid or didn't make sense.
Literally if a critic can't make a review with its any plot spoilers he is doing his job wrong.
I may not agree with Kermode half of the time but I ll take him over any YouTube movie reviewer

>art with a capital F

I don't get their boner for her. Is it because she's the only director they can get to come on the program regularly, or what?

Well he's leagues above any YouTube reviewer, but that doesn't exactly say much. Thing is, often his reviews don't have great depth either. It varies, but some film he does a few quick sentences and doesn't really touch on anything other than the plot and a quick comparison of other films that do the same thing better or worse. Then sometimes it feels like the review is less of a review and more of an essay placing the film in relation to other films in the genre or other works the Director/writers have done. I realise this is a large part of film criticism, but sometimes it doesn't feel like he's entirely judging the film on its own merits.

It seems sometimes, although many will disagree, that he allows gender politics/director's history/contrarianism to colour his opinion of the film. Sometimes it feels like he does prejudge a small bit.

I like his partner on the BBC News show, he's nice

it's because she is a she who is black. you get lots of lefty slap on the back points for that provided you don't mansplain or something equally horrible.

Yep I agree that being better at film criticism than Jeremy Jahns isn't exactly a high praise.
I thin his shorter reviews are sometimes due to the time limitation that radio broadcast has

It is totally. And whatever film she ever makes, whether it's good, bad or indifferent, he will praise it to high heavens. It's so obvious that there is a great amount of goodwill straight away if you tick the lefty checkboxes.

Have either of you seen her films? Are they not good?

Read his writing. He doesn't have time to go in depth on the show.

They're okay.

Yeah, I realise that. I alluded to his longer form reviews in that reply too.

I don't have any real problem with him, certainly not as much as some others in this thread, and I find the show, by and large entertaining. He frustrates me a bit sometimes and I think he likes the smell of his own farts a bit too much.

I have all their shows from when they started uploading them, March 2005 I think. I wonder is there any way to get a hold of the shows from 2001 - 2005.

>I wonder is there any way to get a hold of the shows from 2001 - 2005.
Just get a hold of the shows from 2001 - 2005 :^)

It could still just be the fact that she's the only vaguely successful director who will come on the show semi regularly. Or maybe they're just friends.

I haven't seen them but Mark is known for playing up to identity politics for slaps on the back.

I'm sure they're perfectly fine films

I can't believe it. I walked right into your trap

His politics are completely shit, and he has a serious issue with masculinity, but his passion for and knowledge of cinema is unrivaled, and his charisma is magnetic.

I love listening to him whenever he sticks strictly to cinema and completely detaches his political leanings.

spot on

>I love listening to him whenever he sticks strictly to cinema and completely detaches his political leanings.

Which unfortunately these days, is never.