Why did the chicken cross the road, Ray?

Why did the chicken cross the road, Ray?

It doesn't matter, because i'm no road and ain't no chicken crossing me.

It's a doggy dog world Ray, and I'm a diamond in the ruff

I once told a woman that I was lost in her eyes. That was a lie, Ray. I never get lost. I never even owned a fucking map.

They say the early bird gets the worm. I'm the one that gets the early bird.

Ever hear about the Butterfly Effect, Ray? It say's that a butterfly can flap it's wing in Australia and cause a hurricane in the Caribbean. Right now, I'm in Sydney with a first class ticket to New Orleans and I forgot my water wings.

You know what, Ray? This city has a short fucking memory. One you're at the beginning of a sentence standing tall and proud. The next day, you're smashed in the middle of a jumble of letters without any way of knowing if you're an "i" or an "l." Thing is, Ray, I'm like a forgotten old tee, and nobody crosses me.

Opposites attract, and birds of a feather flock together. What that tells me is if physicists and ornithologists can't agree, might as well cut your science classes, Ray.

My father once told me that where there's smoke, there's fire. What he didn't tell me was that where there's fire, there's heat, and I'm all outta sunblock.

They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away. Tell me, Ray, what would be kept away from a man that only eats lemons?

You catch more flies with honey than vinegar, but what about blood ray. Sometimes you have to bleed before your catch is reeled in. Here I am, stuck like an English monarch and the flies are so thick you can cut them with a knife. This town stinks Ray, and there ain't nothing sweet about it. Caspere knew this.