Why was this so shit?

>"We all like Rey"

Because she's not, she's just a normal hero in the heroes journey

because it wasn't what you expected

yeah it surely is the fat neckbeard alt-right keyboard warriors bigotry that lead them to believe that amirite?

Because you expected a 2 hour TFA roast which would further confirm your raging opinion, which wasn't announced and Mike literally says it in the beginning and in the title that it's a review of the current state of SW. Yet you somehow just denied all that for some reason

Also, why are there no jokes or skits from the review posted on any of these threads?
Before the whole board was plinkett buzzwords and now nothing?

>napalm is birth control
>all the gay characters in sw
>"lonely gay"
>lucas salad unboxing
>tfa fan service

That ring theory part was too long tho

then how comes she is good at everything, has a tragic backstory that doesnt affect her character at all and everybody is interested in her?

it wasn't
it was just a review of a state of star wars franchise and to some extend current state of cinema as a whole.

you're stupid or something?

The thing with the new Plinkett is that it's not about the new Star Wars, it's about Mike. You see, he's obviously having some sort of middle life crisis and made this video for an ego boost: "I invented the star wars reviews posted on youtube!" "TFA is a decent film because of MY contributions!" "millenials BTFO!" You will start to realize some lines in the video like "I AM the internet" may not have as many layers of irony as you thought.

It's the reason why a fat, balding man was the only one to point out the supposed lack of sex in the film, as he lacks sex himself (ED or Jesse simply doesn't want him physically anymore) and projected his crisis into the movie. Other youtube reviewers didn't notice this, because they can easily cum with their gfs or porn.

He is feeling old, and can't properly critize TFA because it makes him feel the same way he felt as he watched A New Hope for the very first time. He'll leave the movie alone but make fun of younger fans who are just having fun (like the guys in the convention), presenting them as obssesed fanboys, while the Ring Theory segment ironically exposes him as an obssesed nerd who has probably seen every Star Wars film 50 times or more.

He became George Lucas. He became Plinkett.

The review was weak and the rest of it was a retread of previous commentary on the franchise.

He liked TFA so it wasn't as funny. No one cared about that ring theory he spent had the video on. We know the prequeks suck. He also patted himself on the back too much.

To be honest, they should have waited for all three to be released before making this review.

but the ring theory bullshit was boring as hell.
I couldn't give a shit about it and hat to fast forward that part

Because he actually loved the new Star Wars, so even when he's shit talking the movie it sounds like shilling.
Although he did point out the biggest issue with it (not a single aspect of this movie was original) he downplayed it.

Because the Plinkett reviews were meant to be complete deconstructions of universally loathed movies and TFA was just meh so there wasn't really much to say.

>How come she is good at everything
The force, being a junker on a shithole of a planet (possible involvement of being a force birth)
>Tragic backstory
I suppose we'll find out
>Everybody interested in her
Lets list em off shall we?
>Finn
First order troop most likely seeing one of the most attractive girls he's ever seen
>Han Solo
He's actually a good guy that wants to help people
>Kylo Ren
Another Force sensitive being in a galaxy that is very light on them

>then how comes she is good at everything

she's the lead character in a family movie that has spaceships and magic, you can suspend your disbelief for all that but can't stop being angry that a girl won.

>TEN MONTHS LATER

it wasn't because there are some people actually believing this kind of shit
moreso it showed what marketing can do. with their recent video they pointed out rt bullshit.

for fuck sake come on...
for people that call each other pleb for a better part of a day you're not giving any thought to what is actually presented.

It's 50% prequel bashing, 30% filler "humor" that makes amy schumer look bearable and 20% empty non-criticism that's actually "subtly" praising the movie. Can't believe Rich and Jay allowed this.

It's pathetic you actually posted this long of a paragraph that projected him in such a bad light without actually adressing any of the movies points

Luke doesvnot succeed as much as he does in ANH.

so spaceships and magic justify bad character writing?

so now the force is an excuse for bad character development?

>Lets list em off shall we?
You forgot how the resistance instantly trusts her for some reason.
Also, how after Han dies, Leia consoles Rey instead of Chewbacca
She is a typical Mary Sue, sucking all attention to her, like a black hole

They probably didn't want to alienate too much the reddit cucks who give them money.
It acknowledged a few flaws (the shitty monster chase/Scottish mafia scene; yellow yoda) but didn't go any further.

>The force is an excuse for bad character development
The light side of the force has always been shown as the stronger side. Rey as a strong Force sensitive was able to tap into it an overcome Kylso who was super conflicted/injured. How is this an absolute failure of a decision?
>Chewie hugging her instead of leia
Valid point but all in all not that importent to the film unless you want it to be

>Typical Mary Sue sucking all attention to her
So every main character is a mary sue/gary stu because the movie is centered around them?

I think you think that Cred Forums is less mainstream than it is

it is just bad storytelling, when the hero uses lightsaber for the first time and is able to easily overcome the main villain, who was jedi/sith for years.

>So every main character is a mary sue/gary stu because the movie is centered around them?
If every character cares about them, even if it doesnt make sense story wise, then yes

>>How come she is good at everything
>The force, being a junker on a shithole of a planet (possible involvement of being a force birth)
so she's not a mary sue because magic can explain all her mary-sueisms. deus ex machina much?
>>Tragic backstory
>I suppose we'll find out
so the movie isn't shit because it'll make sense if you watch the other ones? the work cant be judged on its own? wew
Everyone was written to have a motivation to like Wesley Crusher. He still was a mary sue.

Well maybe because it was one of the dullest reviews in the history of RLM . Each of the points ranting on about the "ring theory" is indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the black jokes, the reviews' only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of hype, all to make memes less magical, to make anons asshurt as they try to use mental gymnastics to make this review "good".

Perhaps the die was cast when Mike "Black bulls need to breed Rey" Stoklasa bowed to the fans and agreed to create yet another Plinkett Review; he made sure the review would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?Just ridiculously convoluted ranting about the prequels. The Plinkett series might be anti-Lucas (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-Kino series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the TFA part of the review was good though
"No!"
The points are weak; the pacing was terrible. As I watched, I noticed that every time Mike was getting into his stride, he had to make yet another "lol Mr.Plinkett is a lunatic" joke.

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that stupid joke was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Mikes's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that he has no other style of editing or comedy. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Plinkett "Star Wars Awakens" by some faggot on r/RedletterMedia. He wrote something to the effect of, "Guys this isn't the best review but its a new style and you guys over hyped it" And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you get hyped for RLM content you are, in fact, trained to be disappointed.

just like the new Plinkett tbqh

>It's bad story telling
Lmao ok, why is it bad story telling? It's been a trope for centuries? The good hearted hero beats the evil experienced hero. Doesn't make it a bad story

>If every character cares about them
Here's a list of characters that didn't care about Rey
>Poe
>General Hux
>Snoke

There ya go, I've found your black Swan!

The new plinkett is to the old plinketts as the Star Wars prequels are to the originals. It's like poetry.

Because it's a buzz word that lost all of its original meaning?
Might as well call her a cuck.

He spent the first entire hour complaining about people who like the phantom menace and calling them pee pee poo poo pants stupids. Who the fuck cares, what does people liking the phantom menace have to do with TFA.

>Lmao ok, why is it bad story telling? It's been a trope for centuries? The good hearted hero beats the evil experienced hero. Doesn't make it a bad story
do you understand the concept of a character arc?

it usually involves struggle and character growth, not the hero beating the overpowered villain from the beginning.
Imagine if Luke had beaten Darth Vader in a new hope, with zero training. How dull would have been the other two movies?

>Here's a list of characters that didn't care about Rey
Good job for finding some side characters who had like two lines. And I am 100% sure Snoke is gonna try seduce her to the dark side in the next movie, so he will care about her a lot.

Kylo is no Darth Vader

Hi Jay

Hi Mike

Hi Rich

Hi Josh

Because no one got that it was a subtle satire of the soft reboot format, in which Plinkett's character basically repeats the same criticisms, retreads the same ground, but in a NEW way for younger, millenial audiences

Nice projection.

ok but it was still shit

>Rey was a bored small time girl who dreamed of better things
>Escaped from planet under military fire
>Went to leave and go home
>Realized she wasn't made for the boring Jakku life

There ya go, that's development that happened

>It should follow the exact same formula as the OT

Wait until it's all out but I have no idea in one way or another Kylo is going to beat Rey next time they face off.

>Three main characters integral to the plot
>Two lines

Do you literally want me to go on IMBD to show you that they all actually had more than two lines?

Because FUCK MOVIES

BOMBSHELL FACT INCOMING:

TFA was actually a good movie and Mike didn't have much ammo to shit on it.

>Rey was a bored small time girl who dreamed of better things
>Escaped from planet under military fire
>Went to leave and go home
>Realized she wasn't made for the boring Jakku life
>So she overpowered the strongest Swordmaster in the galaxy in battle after reading his mind
seems legit

>Wait until it's all out but I have no idea in one way or another Kylo is going to beat Rey next time they face off.
A movie should be able to relay on its own merit
"Ok it was shit but wait for the sequal" is not an argument

Because you're a contrarian and you piss your pants when people like things you don't like. So you bitch and whine and make SURE everyone knows how "reddit" they are for liking something inferior to your interests.

>that's supposed to make it okay
uhh..

If A New Hope was released today, Luke would be considered a Gary Stu.

>why is everyone so interested in him!!!
>he's so good at everything!
>blows up death star without even using his targeting computer!!!!

I predict that Kylo and Rey will switch roles and good Kylo will beat evil Rey.

Because he was desperate to see rey get BLACKED

Because he has nothing interesting or funny to say anymore.

Uh, yeah. If you're reading a Modest Proposal as an actual suggestion that you should eat Irish children, you're going to have a different reaction than if you realize it's satire?

Don't forget the shitstorm we'd have because Leia is such a stronk womyn

Don't forget

>author self-insert
>Luke Skywalker
>Luke S
>Lucas

here is your (you)

Mike came off really scared to have a politically incorrect opinion the whole review.

>can't argue points
>"y-y-you're just baiting!!"

Waste of trips. I'll be taking those now. *pulls brim of hat over eyes*

>only Obi Wan interested in Luke
>only thing he is good at is Flying a ship, which is explained by his backstory of flying a lot on Tatooine
>blowing up the death star is the only remarkable thing he does in the movie and its the big pay off

>proficient with blaster despite being lowly farmboy
>able to swing across large gap with woman in arms while being shot at
>even Han loves him within first 3 scenes of meeting him

wtf are you talking about? He was kinda ok at shooting blaster, but not nearly as good as Han.
And Han Solo kinda looked down on him, treating him as a stupid farmers boy

he should have waited until the new trilogy is done

He was a lot better at aiming than trained professional soldiers.

>good shot kid that was 1 in a million!!
>asks him to come with him on ship and join crew
>comes back to risk life and limb despite fulfilling his basic motivation to save luke

Sums it up perfectly

>He was kinda ok at shooting blaster

Is this bait?

Because she's no more competent than the average protagonist in am adventure movie you stupid fuck.

youtube.com/watch?v=qcrvXD8uCZg

NEW VIDEO
E
W

Plinkett reviews has jumped the shark, obviously

He came back because of Leia, not because of Luke

everybody was better at shooting than trained professional soldiers

translation: WAHHH WHY DIDNT PLINKETT HATE ON TFA HARDER, HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PARROT HIS OPINIONS LIKE A FUCKING SHEEP NOW????!?!?!? KEK!!

No it's more that you're a weak-minded fuckwit easily swayed by meme-logic.

I had the impression that Mike didn't have the inspiration to make a Plinkett review, but it was requested from the fans and he did it for the youtube views.

Because Mike didn't want it to be good enough to make people want another one.

why are you white knighting Mike, when the new Plinkett was obiviously garbage?

If it was just for views why did he make it so fucking long?

She defeated him while he was in obvious agony from a wound he got from a gun the movie had twice established as being insanely powerful. He was bleeding all over the place and pounding his wound to numb it, I'm not sure how much more obvious they could have made the situation for you

lol

i liked it, wasnt as good as the first star wars reviews but was about on par with his star trek reviews

Cred Forums only watched his star wars reviews so they think that every time theres a plinkett video it has to be solid gold every time. retards

his tng reviews are way better

then i envy you, since you seem to have a pretty low quality bar when it comes to reviews

>He came back because of Leia, not because of Luke

Yeah that scene where Luke shames him for leaving being the last one we see Solo in before the one where he decides to turn around clearly illustrates he came back for Leia. You dummy.

>he came back because of Leia

Are you retarded? Han literally comes back to save Luke. The love triangle was originally going to be won by Luke until they changed Leia to be his sister in the late, late redrafts of Empire (so late that the kiss between made the film).

Talked more about TPM nutjob 'circle' theories than he did about the last movie.

Compared to all his earlier videos this was utter shit

i dont wanna sound offensive, but are you guys mabye autistic? Do you have problems with grasping human interactions?
It is well established in a new hope that Han and Leia are flirting a bit with each other, Han has the hots for her (and Luke is kinda jelaous), then when Han Solo wants to leave, Leia is offended and says that he will get his promised reward, but nothing more (implying her).

This, i have no idea why he spent so much time on it. He could have spent 5 minutes making fun of them. Instead he felt he needed to spend an hour talking about why the obviously don't make sense.

Should have just made it a seperate video. But who would want to watch that?

if they make me laugh and provide new insights to the movie then they are good reviews.

his new review did that

>that part where he insinuates that people are undeniably attached to the OT rather than the general Star Wars brand because of the OT merchandise lately

That was retarded. It's fucking Star Wars, people will buy anything with its name on it.

>So... you got your reward and you're just leaving then?
>That's right, yeah! I got some old debts I've got to pay off with this stuff. Even if I didn't, you don't think I'd be fool enough to stick around here, do you? Why don't you come with us? You're pretty good in a fight. I could use you.
>(getting angry) Come on! Why don't you take a look around? You know what's about to happen, what they're up against. They could use a good pilot like you. You're turning your back on them.
>What good's a reward if you ain't around to use it? Besides, attacking that battle station ain't my idea of courage. It's more like suicide.
>All right. Well, take care of yourself. I guess that's what you're best at, isn't it?
>Hey.. may the Force be with you!
--------------------------
>What's wrong?
>Oh, it's Han! I don't know, I really thought he'd change his mind.
>He's got to follow his own path. No one can choose it for him.

Do me a favor. Guess which characters are saying which lines.

Not him, but didn't Kylo pound his wound to draw power from the pain? However you can better argue that he is not a true Sith (which is why the power-pounding didn't work and only made him weaker), and he was emotionally torn from just killing his da.

But even so, even with justification for why the movie's climax battle has been so easy for our protagonist to emerge victorious from, it's just not a good experience for the viewer. She gets overpowered in the first seconds, then goes into some Force peace-of-mind thingie where she closes her eyes all cool-like, and then she just wins the battle without a scratch. This is the most important part, without a scratch. And that makes it boring for the viewer, if there isn't any kind of tension because you know she just magics the fuck out of any dangerous situation -without a scratch-, especially in the bloody climax battle. But it's okay because it's explained that she's Force-sensitive.

>Plinkett didn't validate my opinion so that means EVERYONE hated it, r-right guys???

>if its popular it must be good
nice argument

>You forgot how the resistance instantly trusts her for some reason.
The Rebellion gave Han and Lando the rank of "General" after Han nearly up and left after getting paid and Lando literally betrayed Rebel-aligned royalty and a general to the fucking Empire. They're a pretty naive sort.

>Also, how after Han dies, Leia consoles Rey instead of Chewbacca
Bad writing, but doesn't make her a Mary Sue.

Because it was an insecure projection rather than an actual review.

TFA had nonsensical elements brought into the franchise while also debasing the legacy of older beloved characters, just like the prequels.

But, like most star wars nerds, an appeal to nostalgia beats a critical eye. So instead of either actually criticizing the movie or not doing the review at all, he took the easy way out by did a repetitive tirade of Hollywood trends and an obviously contrived fan theory that could've been done in 3-5 minutes.

And? Luke is borderline incompetent outside of a few moments in the OT. I love that about Luke, but do you want the new trilogy to be even MORE like the original?

Because it proved more than before Mike is an obsessed fanboy

>The Rebellion gave Han and Lando the rank of "General" after Han nearly up and left after getting paid and Lando literally betrayed Rebel-aligned royalty and a general to the fucking Empire. They're a pretty naive sort.
And that was bad writing, aswell. No wonder RotJ is considered the worst of the original triology.

>Bad writing, but doesn't make her a Mary Sue.
If this was the only incident, then no. But all those little incidents add up

Yet if the video had mostly negative ratings, you would be posting a screenshot of that here.

I think we're going to see in the next two movies that Kylo Ren is not exceptionally force sensitive.

Sure, he's got some force powers, like the ability to sense people he's connected to (which Leia exhibits) but he fails to read Rey's mind and is instead overpowered by her--someone who's power literally revealed itself just then. He also fails to move the lightsaber at all. Rey moved it. He couldn't even get it to jiggle.

To explain his ability to stop shit or move people, there was an EU story where a non-force sensitive outfitted his gauntlets with technology that simulated force powers, especially force lightning, which back then was seen as something unique and not a video game power upgrade.

Mr. Plinkett V: The Phantom Pain

it didn't challenge my opinions either. there are a million and one reasons why TFA is shit but mike just says "it's a good movie" and then talks about interracial sex.

I didn't like the video.

I agreed with them for the most part, and I'm fine with them doing something different (even though I wanted to see them rip apart TFA, a movie I loved), but the video they made just lacks the focus. They go after a ton of different things loosely related through Star Wars, but never really bring it all together or go as in-depth as they should. It feels rushed. It feels not thought out. And for a video that took forever to release, that's a bad sign.

That all said, I still like them and their videos. I'm still subbed. I still watch the latest HitB. I just don't think this Plinkett was good, and hope they either retire him for good, or do better next time.

>Kylo Ren is not exceptionally force sensitive.
Would make sense. Leia wasn't very strong in the Force, and Han couldn't even use the Force.

>Do me a favor. Guess which characters are saying which lines.
He can't because he's only seen the original trilogy once, a long time ago when his dad was watching it.

>And for a video that took forever to release, that's a bad sign.
Disney had to approve it.

Notice how for every plot hole and critique he finds an explanation (plays devil's advocate). He doesn't excuse only the most nitpicky parts but then he himself says they're just nit picking and he liked the movie.

First one is Yoda.

Second one is another Yoda.

Third one is a Chewbacca.

It's possible Disney is paying them. The part where they claim everyone is getting paid out by Disney would definitely make a whole lot more sense that way.

But no, I think they genuinely like TFA because it is a return to the Star Wars they loved.

>It's possible Disney is paying them
They literally call TFA a "scam" in the Plinkett review, you dumb fuck.

>Disney had to approve it.
I really hope you're just trolling and aren't legitimately this retarded.

Hey, dude, watch your language.

You're on thin ice, buster.

One more cuss and I'm calling your mom.

he stopped a fucking blaster bolt mid-air dude

>to explain his ability to stop shit or move people, there was an EU story where a non-force sensitive outfitted his gauntlets with technology that simulated force powers

Do you even know how to read?

Dude careful

might be serious.

The lengths autists will go to defend their pretend Internet friends is incredible. The review was shit.

THEY LIKE ME SHUT UP

It was too adventurous, everyone thought so too

ok you got me
Let's not forget who's writing these films though

>a bunch of huge fucking nerds who love stealing shit from old stories and making it theirs

So you're saying it's plausible

1.5 million views for a 2h hour review
It can't be that bad

e-celeb fags get million of views on "drama" coverage, its can't be that bad
>views meaning anything
especially when the TPM review has 7+m views on the first part, and way less with further parts

Because another decently prominent online personality already dug into that. What really can you add?

You're missing the point. Just because the script gives explanations as to why she's good at everything doesn't matter. From a narrative stand point a protagonist who never loses is boring. You don't get it.

His audience has always been millenials. Why does Cred Forums always talk about millenials like they aren't millenials too? We're in our 20s, we're fucking millenials.

Pottery. One job

using his gloves dingus. did you even watch the movie?

Can I have more like this?

Because you were expecting it to hate TFA, but it didn't.

Everyone here wanted some spicy new memes and to have RLM vindicate you for feeling "Rey's an ebil SJW ploy" or "waaah, NIGTROOPER" or "why haven't I been told everything in one film"

But instead you got a forced and half baked "fuck you" to all the people that demanded this.

The Prequel Reviews worked because they were objectively terrible movies being dissected for the shit they were.

This was just pandering fan service, unable to find real fault with an average to good reboot, so instead turned into an ironic diatribe against fandoms and those who exploit them.

>then how comes she is good at everything

The ghost of Obi Wan had been lecturing her about everything, for her entire life.

Because you don't get told everything on film 1 of a trilogy.
And they are going to pull a Revan on Rey.

Pretty sure a lot of people were expecting it to at least address the actual movie and challenge their views, not talk about diversity and sex for the whole duration of the 'review'.

It wasn't though

He was right again ,needed more Interracial romance

Because he pushed the prediction that she is the reincarnation of Anakin, thus all of the stuff she is magically good at would be her remembering all of Anakin's old skills. This review wasn't that good because it's clear SWTFA is setting up a lot of stuff for the next couple movies, so if he did nitpick the film, most of his problems could be solved by the next movie. There is, at this point, no way to be sure and Mike probably doesn't want most of his critique to become null and void in two years. If we wanted a full rundown like we had with the prequels we would have to wait for this story with Rey and Finn to be over and discontinued, but that could take 6-10 years and by then Mike could be dead from alcohol poisoning. So its best to stick with bashing the prequels and saying you are excited to see what happens and hope all your questions will be answered.

What's to challenge?
It was an inoffensive reboot.
The End.

Because he was punching down, not up.

It's fun to point out how someone above you is completely incompetent at their job. It's not fun to listen to someone smugly bash clickbait sites that no one ever took seriously in the first place.

who?

Spent an hour beating an already dead horse. Aside from a few nitpicks he barely talked about the TFA or made any effort to deconstruct how shockingly safe and uninteresting the whole spectacle of it was. TFA being "good" is no excuse, he could probably could have made an hilarious nitpicky review of Citizen Kane if he put his mind to it.

>bash clickbait sites that no one ever took seriously in the first place

This. It was entirely something they've percieved from their own obsession with the movie. It's common knowledge clickbait sites are not worth any time.