Character goes to a bar

>character goes to a bar
>orders a beer
>only drinks one or two gulps before leaving

>Bartender doesn't ask and patron doesn't say what kind.

>patron doesn't awkwardly sit at the bar trying to get bartender's attention with eye contact, head bobs, and hand movements while being ignored for 10 minutes before being noticed
>doesn't even end up ordering the wrong thing once he's finally noticed

This happens. Bartenders are supposed to be able to give you something they think you'll like.

Learn to have a presence.

>Character lights up a cigarette
>Immediately tosses it

lol

>orders beer
>the fake prop beer in the bottle is not even bubbly

That sounds like: learn to be a douchebag

It's always better to be direct. Waving money around to catch the morons attention is a good start, if he gives you a sideways look or any attitude you leave and go somewhere else

>not being a mouse at a bar means you're a douchebag

I can see you're socially retarded. My sympathies.

>not finishing your beer in one or two gulps

Whatever, at least I'm not a numale faggot desperately trying to fit in. Kissing the bartenders ass, vying for his attention just to get an overpriced beer placed in front of you with a complimentary look of contempt; the only thing you'll get for free and in abundance

Nope, I've seen betas act this way and there's no chance in hell I'll ever stoop to that level

>not drinking cheap vodka at home

Just can't relate

>getting your drink asap means you're a kissass or numale

Yeah, please don't contribute to the gene pool.

if you're constantly getting looks of contempt from bartenders of all people, you should probably reevaluate your personality user

nigga u dumb

>is autistic
>drinks vodka
let me guess, finn?

>Character doesn't stay till he spent his last 20 dollars and then goes home and drinks mouthwash and imitation vanilla and whatever few beers he has left trying to get a deeper buzz

I really can't get into those movies.

>getting your drink asap means you're a kissass or numale

Yeah, because of the means you use to get it. ie: kissing ass
Your money isn't enough, you have to apply chapstick and slather his asshole in front of everyone with no shame whatsoever. You're pathetic man. You think you're cool because you have the beer vendors ear, you practically stuck your tongue in his anus and emptied out your wallet to pay homage

What message are you sending out by doing that?

So just to be clear, the only people who get their drink in less than a few minutes are those who vigorously rim the bartender's asshole?

When was the last time you had a real social interaction?

Just kill yourself already

Who hurt you, user?

American

>character goes to a bar
>orders a heineken beer

>car gets crushed by object
>person nearby clicks their keychain remote
>*beep brrp b-*

>character goes to a bar
>plays pool
>nobody keeps score, they're knocking any ball in while talking
>sometimes they both take their turn at the same time

Who hurt you, user?

>Doesn't even pay
>No one stops them or so much as looks at them funny

>>character goes to a bar

lol u tk him 2da bar|?

>character goes to a pub with friends
>does not get approached by a massive drunk patron insistent on repetitive monologues and occasional bouts of anger, physical threats and constant homoeroticism
>does not get left at the table with the aggressively rapish drunk when friends suddenly get up and move to a different one
>does not have to crawl out of the toilet window at 4 AM to get home without causing the guy to freak out
Really can't get into this.

>patron orders his first drink
>barkeep stares at his hand as it shakes

Just me?

>pots black off the break

Literal autism

PABST

>character says "let's go to the pub"
>it's actually a bar

>projecting this hard

Lol this fucking aspie is triggered so deeply, he may even need medical attention.

Literally go "Hey bartender!", not moving around like a jackass.

>spying device is flickering and making strange beeps

>character demands WHISKEY all one word, gruff
>bartender places a shot glass and the bottle
>character throws shot glass against the wall, starts drinking from the bottle
>is somehow not thrown out on his ass by the bouncer

>super intelligent alien/being new to human civilization
>watches TV for 2 days and learns the whole human history and every language