COULD WE PLEAZ 'AVE AN ORK MOVIE?

there was this guy on Cred Forums like 2 years back who did the sickest 40K Ork impression

I hope he's still alive

It's a shame, because making a 40k movie is achievable with today's technology, but the universe is not attractive to anyone but the fans.

A Gaunt's Ghosts tv series could work well, considering it has less of the more wacky elements of 40k lore, but it's a big investment for something that probably wouldn't pay off.

Only retarded faggots give a shit about orks.

For a good but profitable 40k movie, there has to be enough explanation for the general public and eye candy for them but fan service and references as well.

Which is a damn shame because Warhammer 40k is not easy to explain while keeping the reasons why it is awesome.

Me dad's an Ork Player too ya git.
Coz it'd be so much betta if we wuz all skwakin' BANE BANE BANE CRASH DER ZOGGIN PLANE roite?

The little bit of text at the beginning of all the books could work as an extremely basic primer, but it's not going to be possible for them to condense all the lore into 1 movie. It's just not accessible unless you also read the Black Library books or you've played the tabletop game.

The reason I suggested Gaunt's Ghosts is because an army is fairly easy for people to grasp, and the other elements like Commissars and psykers and the like are easy to introduce.

Also a tv series would allow the necessary time for character and backstory development.

That actually makes a lot of sense.

As long as we get a Horus Heresy TV show, I'll be happy.

>Gots nowt else
>Cries yer orrtiztik
Oomie can't spell Ded Orky.
Got no sense uv oomer neever.

>Horus Heresy TV show.
Let me tell you exactly how this would go.

Network heads are drunk and high enough one day to OK this.

They quickly realise the budget required to do the whole thing is astronomical so they make massive sweeping cuts and simplify the hell out of it.

Fans hate the necessary changes. Particular hatred goes to Hugh Jackman as the Yiffy Primarch and the bad latex makeup on Magnus the salmon pink.

Normies are confused about which of the space american football players to root for.

It gets cancelled after a season or less.

Much as I hate to say it, anime would be a much more realistic way to achieve it.

...

>Anime
You really want Japanese "Writers" touching the Heresy? What is already a pretty convoluted saga would turn 10,000 episodes of incomprehensible nonsense and powering up. Never mind what they'd do to Sanguinius.

I don't think it's necessary to explain everything. I didn't know that the Emperor was actually dead for awhile despite everyone always mentioning him.

I never claimed it would be good. Just that it would be a more realistic way for it to happen.

You're right of course. Chances are almost certain a 40k anime would be god awful and alienate weebs and 40kids alike.

>A while
He's been "dead" for about 10,000 years plus or minus a handful.

At least anime wouldn't be afraid to depict the Primarchs precisely as powerful as they should be.

No I mean I didn't know he was dead until after a few months of getting into 40k.

Yes, I'm sure watching Sanguinius break the spine of a bloodthirster at the siege of Terra would be epically animated. Right up until he's voiced by a woman and blows the bloodthirster a kiss goodbye.

Or dying in the emperor's arms...
"Papa...sama...."
Single tear, drops in slow motion on a black backdrop, plinky plonk noise.
Cut to Emperor. He mad.

Yeah. Sounds great.

Oh. My bad.

It's hard to make a film about GW stuff because their whole shtick is to take themes from other media in the same genre and give it an absurdly dark treatment which borders on comedy. Some of it can be played straight while some of it is too ridiculous. They even had an Inquisitor called Obiwan Sherlock Clouseau at one time. It's fun to read about, harder to make a film about. I feel the only way it could have been done right is in the eighties and directed by John Carpenter or Paul Verhoeven.

I want you to be wrong, but you're right. A 40K anime would be a fucking travesty.

There's worse.
40K Toku.

>Roboute Guilleman
>ULTRA HEN-SHIN!
My brain, full of fuck.

Sure theres warcraft, but i want a movie about orcs. Classic orcs, like a world war 2, band of brothers, also comedy.

OP PAINT YOUR TV RED THEN U GET IT FASTER

>Eee fell fer (((Mekboy))) paint em red kunspirrusee
Good grot, don't ask why dem tins o red cost so menny Teef...

Definitely agree that a more grounded start would be better, but I think Cain would be the best introductory series.

It's a lot lighter, while still carrying the more serious parts, and most importantly is among the smallest scale conflicts you see in 40k.
Everyone else has system wide conflict, while Cain deals with planetary at most and often just regimental.

I want a movie about an Orc male - Human female love story.
They only need to paint Idris Elba green.

Cain's a good choice.

He's no Gregor Eisenhorn. IMO.

DUDE RACISM LMAO

holy shit i love Cred Forums

>Orc
Its spelled Ork.
>Male
They reproduce via spores idiot.
Educate yourself better on this autistic fandom dedicated to selling toys.

A movie about warboss Idris Elba deposing his spores on white human females would have been a success.

>He thinks spores are parastric and require a host species
LMAO
Educate yourself pleb.
Try biology 101 and Lexicanum.

>don't know shit about warhammer
>read about orks because bored
>learn that their beliefs become reality

pretty neat, actually

Its not as far reaching as some fans would have you believe, but yeah, its a cool concept.

this is no longer canon

Bulshit.
What you mean is you got butthurt by /tg/ jokes taking it too far now you refuse to accept it in tour head canon.

No more omnipotent morons?
That concept really gave me a Mr. Magoo vibe.

Ignore the Muppet saying its not canon.

It was never that they were omnipotent.
It was small things like red cars really do go a little faster, a piece of junk shaped like a gun with all the rightish gubbins in the rightish places will still fire even if its loaded with the wrong sized bullets and in the hand of a human would fall apart. Stuff like that. Minor things.

you obviously have no idea what you're talking about and are barely coherent in your rage

>It was small things like red cars really do go a little faster, a piece of junk shaped like a gun with all the rightish gubbins in the rightish places will still fire even if its loaded with the wrong sized bullets and in the hand of a human would fall apart.
Is it possible to learn this power?

Read some fluff son.

The low level gestalt psychic field, the Waagh energy, is still very much canon. Only its effects were exaggerated to comic effect on /tg/.

I'm apoplectic with indifference, but you are still wrong. Sorry.

Its innately Orky as far as I know.

>tfw no all guardsmen party band of brothers style series

They'd be brutalized in seconds. It would work better with space marines.

As someone said earlier...
>Normies are confused about which of the space american football players to root for.
You need to have someone a modern human being can relate to. Space Marines are indoctrinated super soldier monks, its not an easy sell to relate to that. Even if you followed a single recruit through the process of becoming a space marine, the film would either get bohghed down with the length of the process or there would be a sudden jarring cut between the character we knew and the Marine he has become.

The Space Marine video game did it right, one young zealotous hard line SM who takes the codex absolutely literally and everything else is heresy and one older SM who is wise and loyal, knows a lot but says little as your companions and the protagonist as a 'middle age' SM who is willing to take the whole religion around the emperor thing with the tiniest pinch of salt (also can withstand warp energy a little bit, which sees him taken in by the inquisition at the behest of the young marine at the end of the game).
It doesn't work if every one of them is like the first guy because nobody likes watching huge space racists, but if there's anywhere where you can tweak the canon a little to suit your needs it's in 40k.

>A 40K product designed for existing 40K fans made minor changes to a Marine to make thee story more interesting
Big fucking deal.
You and I are already steeped in the lore. We know they've got acid spit, extra lungs, a secondary heart. We know they are the decaying remnants of multiple millennia of genetic engineering by a demigod that created super humans.
We GET what a Space Marine is.

To Joe Public he's just a tall bloke in fancy armour who acts funny because of some silly space religion.

The all guardsmen party is a /tg/ story time about some grunts who get drafted into the inquisition, and have to navigate their way through the mire of mystery and CO incompetence.
Mostly done with luck, thievery and a fuckton of explosives

>Human grunts with an Inquisitor patron.
One of the best ways a 40k film could work. You get to introduce the world piecemeal, you have surrogates for the audience who are just as confused and curious as the audience is.
Honestly, a series of movies or episodes or even seasons of anime like this branching off to "backdoor piloted" tie ins would be a great way to get 40k out there if written well.

Daily reminder that Orks don't mean shit because the Tyranids will overrun everything.

an ork movie would be really repetitive and have no structure
they will ALWAYS work better as an antagonistic faction because they are great in small doses, but I couldn't deal with an hour and a half of "WAAAAGH"

>but I couldn't deal with an hour and a half of "WAAAAGH"
I think anyone who has ever spent time with overenthusiastic Ork players would heartily agree

they could just outsource the animation
korea is rivaling japan hard in animation now anyway
everything japanese animated in the legend of korra was horrendous, and the fans demanded the korean animators back
youtube.com/watch?v=luSB7CstoYo

How does the Lord Inquisitor look better than any CGI in history, despite being a fan-movie spearheaded by one guy?
youtube.com/watch?v=cZc6cr6G2E4

I don't understand how Hollywood CGI has never looked this good

You're either deluded or very sheltered if you think this is "the best BGI in history". Fucking Final Fantasy Spirits Within had better character models and facial animations.

You already have one, it's called mad max fury road.

>yfw i win a national painting contest of warhammer in my country.