Cred Forums I need some serious advice/guidance

Cred Forums I need some serious advice/guidance.

weigh 450+lbs
dont have a job
dont have money
dont have a car
am honestly seriously depressed
have distanced all my friends/lost most of them
mom is sick/dying (6-12 months)

Starting tomorrow I am going to start getting my shit together.

As of right now my plan is:
Eat 1200 calories
Look for job online to save up money for a car so I can get a real job (I have experience in I.T)

Any advice, thoughts, or shit talking would be greatly appreciated.

Things I need help with:
Any good places/ways to get an online job (I just need enough money for a car)
Creating a paradigm shift in life so I am less of a piece of shit?

Im a failure, I dont know what to do, but I have to try for my mother.

Sorry if this is rambly/retarded/lame

I don't have much to contribute but you should stick to your plan OP. Hope you're successful.

Go vegan if you're 100% serious about losing weight. Don't worry about 1200 calories. Vegan diet of 2000 calories per day you will still lose weight very rapidly if you simply walk every day as far as you can manage. No snacks. Drink lots of water. No juice or soda.

scat porn for money at first
then, work mac donald
easy AF

Why now? What changed?

Eat a carnivore diet and lose weight in no time. You can always camwhore, or work for a call center at home. Good luck my friend; find health.

I appreciate that man.

I actually was vegan for 6-8 months in the past when I was eating 1200 calories a month, but it was extremely hard to track all of the micro nutrients/get them in while remaining at 1200.

Will you buy my scat porn?

I live with my mom and we got the news that she is getting worse/extremely worse.

Thanks for the advice, and kind words. Can I camwhore as a 450+ lbs man?

Consider praying to God for help.

the fact that youre going to try makes you a better person than before. Goodluck man!

Agree

You are probably the retard that shitposts in BBC threads about how "superior" you are and repost "Bbc is a myth" picture in every thread. LMAO.

That's a fucked amount of calories. Download myfitnesspal and use that. It'll suck at first but it gets better and your cravings go away as your body adjusts.

Avoid simple sugars and meme diets. Losing weight is half the battle, the other is keeping it off and a meme diet is a fad.

Every time you're about to snack ask yourself if that is the snack hats worth being a fatass over. If that is worth feeling like shit over.

Don't listen to this idiot. Just stop eating so many carbs. At 450 pounds eat small portions or nothing at all honestly or go on a keto diet. Veganism is a horrible and unhealthy fad diet

Are you me? Sounds almost exactly like me. And you can eat way way more.
I'm only 350lbs and eat 2100 cals and sit home all day and still lose 4lbs a week

1. You've got like a 99% chance to fail. Keep that concept in mind when you start making excuses to fall back into old habits. To succeed, it will take what seems to you to be extraordinary willpower.

2. Bump your calorie count up. 1200 is too low and will likely have you binging within the next two weeks.

You can go a month or more without eating if you weigh 450+lbs. It's hard for the first few days but it gets easier. Drink water and a little coffee

Fat fuck

Thanks for the advice.

I mean, for what its worth, I don't but I imagine it is someone similar to me, or in a position like mine. You gotta cope by holding on to whatever you can, you know?

I know its low, but I have done it before, and I think I can again. If it becomes an issue I will raise the amount. I think I will just always have to count calories, forever.

Thank you for the kind words, yo.

I am just going to the calories thing, I have a had great success before with it (over 100lbs lost).

You are right. Thank you for helping build an honest perspective. I will reconsider my caloric deficit.

Thanks for the info!

:(

Gonna be honest with ya, you should also make some post on Reddit if you're desperate. They're kinder

this is such terrible advice a vegan diet is terrible for people who can't control their eating habits.

>be fat
>become vegan
>now I'm fat and malnourished

gtfo

Get some nude pics and vids of a girl and sell them on kik omegle and here even.
I've done it and made great money.

I apperciate 4chans ability to not take itself seriously and help maintain an honest perspective. For long term support I may consider it.

Thanks for your input.

Part of depression is the self-recriminatory remarks and low self esteem.
You're not a piece of shit, you're just under pressure and have been for too long.

Start slow, or you'll break and then be even harder on yourself.
Go for walks, find a simple job and that's it.
Walking, working, sleeping - and I suppose, talk to your mother about important things before she goes.

When the walk/work/sleep/talk pattern is accomplished, add more things - but never overtax yourself. And remember to have at least one full day of nothing to relax in.

Best of luck user.

Pic unrelated

teach yourself how to code

Look up "tyrese gibson motivational" on yt and watch the majority of videos that pop up. Thank me later

Don't just consider it, do it right now. Although Reddit might be slow when it comes to responses, the quality of responses honestly better off on Reddit than here.

At the very least try out other boards on here for certain advice; Cred Forums isn't known for such

Losing weight: Car advice: Never visited this place but advice in general: I don't know about finding a job, my inexperienced ass would just say to find some local fast food place or like you said, to look for some job online.

Why is losing weight the top priority? Your mother is sick and the solution you need to lose weight? That’s fucking selfish. Sure it might help get the job, but that’s the priority- find a fucking job first.

You haven’t been working for a while? I’d say not if your asking as dumb a question as ‘do I look online for jobs’- yes, that’s the only place to look. That’s such a retarded question I’m thinking this is bait.

1st priority- get a job. If you haven’t worked for a while, any job. Anyone who hasn’t worked for 3 months loses their work fitness- they struggle through 8 hour shifts for a while, till they get work fit.

Employers know this, so they know anyone who has been unemployed for a while is a gamble. So to get a good job, start with anything, then apply for better jobs.

posting on Cred Forums is not IT experience

A MAJOR part is also goals. Setting goals is huge if you want to maintain your losses and get better. Yea, have the long-term goal of major weight-loss, steady income, etc, but short term goals are also massive.
-look at a weakly weight loss goal.
-Apply to a certain number of jobs per day
-Exercise a certain amount per day
Having short-term goals allows you to maintain motivation for the long haul

>If you haven’t worked for a while, any job

Bad advice. Finding a job isn't that hard. There are many labor jobs you can get hired without an interview. You can't do jobs like that. You probably can't even stand at a register for 8 hours. Look for something that isn't labor related, and it might be a good idea to start with something that is part-time.

Fair points, but we don’t know his labour market. A chronically unemployed neet is unlikely to walk into an IT job- in my 1st world company unemployment is at a record low, but IT jobs are heavily contested, and the presently unemployed are first to be cut. A job is most important to get a momentum and experience

...

Fuck, thank you. You are right, and I am gonna focus on shifting that negative chatter about myself into positive. I also really like your simplistic approach. I am going to use some of this. Thank you.

I have actually been looking into this. Any resources, ideas on what language, or anything?

I will.

You are right, I will do it right now. Thank you for the other places.

Right, I dont disagree with what you are saying I just think we have a misunderstanding. I dont believe I am in the physical position to work a job that I have to go too. My goal is to lose enough weight/get my mobility up enough to be able to find a higher paying IT job in my area. I agree, my first priority is finding any job first.

I have been out of work for about a year. My question is more centered around resources because I have been having no luck with flexjobs and my membership ran out. I can understand how that looks retarded. Thank you for your advice, you are right. It is my top priority and is something I will focus on. Thank you for you serious and honest perspective/input.

Haha, I have never posted on there. I 1-2 years of I.T. experience work related to Managed Service Providers.

Thats great advice. I will focus on making micro goals that add to my macro goals. Thank you for bringing this up.

You are right, I cannot. I will look both online and locally for something related to IT or data entry related work.

Sorry, I could have put more information in this. I live in Salt Lake City. I do have experience already in IT.

hey fuck off

That's a rare pepe. Never seen it before.